7.

 

Должен признаться, если меня и потрясло, то только умная женщина... соблазнения; но еще более сильный голос, голос моего сердца, которому я отдаю себя. внимательно следила, боролась со своими софитами; я объявила Дюбуа, что я был полон решимости никогда не позволять себя развратить. Очень хорошо; она ответила: "Стань тем, чего ты хочешь, я оставляю тебя наедине с твоими извинениями". судьба, но если тебя когда-нибудь повесят, то тебе конец... не может избежать, благодаря смертельному исходу, который неизбежно спасает жертвуя добродетелями, по крайней мере, помните, прежде чем умереть. не говоря уже о нас. Извините.

Пока мы спорили, четыре спутника Дюбуа пили.... с браконьером, и так как вино располагает сердце злоумышленника к новому. и заставляет его забыть о своих старых бандитах как можно раньше. узнал о моей решимости, чем не смог сделать меня их сообщником, они решили сделать меня своей жертвой, своими принципами, своими принципами. манеры поведения, темное уединение, в котором мы были, безопасность, в которой они думали. наслаждались, их пьянством, моим возрастом, моей невиновностью... Всё. воодушевлял их. Они встают из-за стола, шепотом совещаются, они консультируются с Дюбуа, делая вещи, от которых у меня мурашки по коже дрожат от загадочности. с ужасом, и, наконец, ко мне приходит приказ... чтобы удовлетворить желания каждого из четырех, если я пойду на это. с радостью каждый даст мне корону, чтобы помочь мне на пути, если... они должны применить насилие, все равно это будет сделано, но... тем лучше охранять их секрет, когда они закончат со мной. ударит ножом и похоронит меня у подножия дерева.

Мне не нужно рисовать то, как это жестокое предложение повлияло на меня, Мадам, вам не составит труда понять, что я утонул в своем... на колени перед Дюбуа, я просил ее во второй раз стать моей... защитница: низкое создание смеялось надо мной, но смеялось над моими слезами:

О, Боже мой, вот она, несчастная малышка. Что? дрожать перед обязанностью служить четырем хорошим большим мальчикам один за другим. Другой? Послушай меня, она добавила, после некоторого размышления. над этими дорогими парнями достаточно велика для меня, чтобы получить помилование для вас при условии, что вы сделаете себя достойным этого. "

Увы! Мадам, что мне делать, я плакал сквозь слезы; Командуйте мной; я готов. Команда готова.

Присоединяйтесь к нам, бросайте с нами свою долю и совершайте те же самые поступки, без проявления малейшего отвращения, или это, или я не могу спасти тебя от остальных. Я не думала, что смогла бы сомневаюсь; принимая это жестокое состояние, я подвергал себя опасности дополнительные опасности, конечно, но они были менее непосредственными; возможно, я смогу избежать их, в то время как ничто не сможет спасти меня. от тех, с кем мне угрожали.

Я буду ездить с вами повсюду, мадам, и это был мой быстрый ответ. Дюбуа, я обещаю тебе повсюду, защити меня от гнева этих людей. мы с мужчинами никогда не оставим тебя в живых. Извини.

Дети, Дюбуа сказал четырем бандитам, что эта девочка - одна из тех. компанию, я втягиваю ее в это; я прошу вас не делать ей ничего плохого, не отталкивай ее от первого желудка в первые дни пребывания в нём; вы видите, насколько полезными могут быть ее возраст и лицо для нас; давайте воспользуемся ими. в нашу пользу, вместо того, чтобы жертвовать ими ради наших удовольствий.

Но такова степень энергии в человеческих страстях, которую ничто не может дать. покорить их. Человек, с которым я имел дело, не должен был обращать внимания. Причина: все четверо окружили меня, пожирали огненным пламенем. взгляды, угрожали мне еще более ужасно; они были о том. чтобы наложить на меня руки, я собирался стать их жертвой.

Она должна пройти через это, и одна из них объявила. слишком поздно для обсуждения: ей не сказали, что она должна представить доказательства того. добродетели, чтобы попасть в банду воров, и однажды... мало используется, не будет ли она такой же пригодной для службы, как и сейчас. девственница?"

Я смягчаю их выражения, вы понимаете, мадам. подсластить саму сцену; увы! их непристойности были такими. ваша скромность может пострадать, по крайней мере, так же сильно, если вы увидите их. без декораций, как и моя застенчивость.

Беззащитная и дрожащая жертва, я дрожала; я едва ли смогла силы дышать; преклоняя колени перед квартетом, я встал на колени и поднял свою слабость. чтобы молить мужчин, а сердце Дюбуа растопить....

&p>&cot;Мгновенно,

сказал тот, кого зовут Ку-де-Фер и оказался шефом группы, 36-летним мужчиной. силу быка и выносливость лица сатыра; "один момент, друзья: возможно, удастся удовлетворить всех заинтересованных лиц; так как добродетель этой маленькой девочки так ценна для нее, и с тех пор, как Дюбуа заявляет очень хорошо, что это качество, в противном случае, может быть реализовано. станут для нас чем-то стоящим, давайте оставим это ей, но у нас есть чтобы успокоиться; у нас теплое настроение, Дюбуа, и мы в таком состоянии. в, знаешь ли, мы могли бы перерезать тебе горло, если бы тебе пришлось встань между нами и нашими удовольствиями; пусть Тереза мгновенно раздеться так же обнаженно, как в тот день, когда она появилась на свет, а на следующий день... чтобы она удочерила одну за другой все позиции, которые нам нравятся. и тем временем Дюбуа насытит наши голодные, мы сожжем наш фимиам на входе в алтарь, от которого это существо отказывается. нас."

Я воскликнул: "О, Боже, что это ты делаешь! требуют от меня? Когда я предам себя таким образом Твоим глазам, Кто сможет ответить за меня?

Но Кур-де-Фер, который, казалось, тоже не в настроении, чтобы дать мне больше... или приостановить его желания, взорваться с клятвой и ударить по мне так жестоко, что я видел, что полное подчинение было моим последним средством. Он отдал себя в руки Дюбуа, а она оказалась в его руках. расстройство более или менее эквивалентно моему, и как только я стал как он того хотел, заставив меня присесть на четвереньки так. что я похож на зверя, Дюбуа взял в руки очень чудовищного. и привел его к перистилям сначала одного, а затем другого. алтарей природы, и под ее руководством наносит им удары. я здесь и там были, как у тарана, громопотрясшегося над ворота осажденного города в старые времена. Шок от первого удара Нападение заставило меня вернуться; разгневанный Ку-де-Фер угрожал мне. более суровое лечение, если я отступлю от них; Дюбуа - приказала удвоить свои усилия, один из вольноотпущенников схватил меня. и не дает мне поколебаться перед сотрясениями: они становятся настолько свирепыми, что я в крови и могу избежать ни одного.

Действительно, я бы предпочёл открыть вместо неё заикание Кура-де-Фера... двери, вместо того, чтобы видеть их разрушенными таким образом, но ей не придется и мы недалеко от капитуляции..... Энергично... энергично, Дюбуа... "

И взрывное извержение пламени этого развратного пламени, почти так же. яростно, как удар молнии, мерцает и умирает на крепостных валах. опустошенной, не будучи разрушенной.

Вторая заставила меня встать на колени между его ног и в то время как Дюбуа управлял им так же, как и она делала это с другими, двумя предприятиями. поглотил все его внимание: иногда он сильно ударил, но... очень нервно, или мои щеки, или моя грудь, иногда его грязный рот упал до моего сосания. В мгновение ока мое лицо повернулось. фиолетовый, красная грудь.... Мне было больно, я умоляла его пощадить меня, слезы выпрыгнули из моих глаз; они разбудили его, он ускорил его. он укусил меня за язык, и две клубники на моей груди. были настолько синяками, что я соскользнул назад, но не упал. Они подтолкнули меня к Нему, я был везде более яростно домогался, и его экстази....

Третий бейд, на котором я сел и расположил два несколько разрозненных. сидя на стульях и, сидя рядом с ними, взволнованный Дюбуа, лгунья. держал меня на руках, пока его рот не опустился прямо ниже. храм природы; никогда не представляете, мадам, что это за непристойность. смертный взял это себе в голову; добровольно, волей-неволей, я был обязан удовлетворить все его потребности..... Только небо! Какой человек, как бы то ни было. испорченный, может ощутить мгновение удовольствия в таких вещах..... Я сделал это что он хотел, затопил его, и мое полное подчинение обеспечило ему этого грязного человека, опьянение которого он был неспособен без этого... позор.

Четвертая привязана ко всем частям меня, к которым она была привязана. их можно было связать, он держал концы в руках и сел. в семи или восьми футах от моего тела; прикосновения и поцелуи Дюбуа взволнованы. я стоял прямо, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоя, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоял, стоя, стоя. эту веревку, теперь на какую-то другую, которую дикарь раздражал. удовольствия; я качался, я терял равновесие снова и снова, он летал в экстази всякий раз затягивал все шнуры, в конце концов. Однажды я упал на пол перед ним: таков был его замысел, и... мой лоб, грудь, щеки, щёки получили доказательства бредового состояния. он был обязан только этой манией. Это то, от чего я страдал, мадам, но... по крайней мере, мою честь уважали, несмотря на то, что моя скромность, несомненно. Нет. Их спокойствие восстановилось, бандиты говорили о восстановлении дороги, и в ту же ночь мы прибыли в Тремблай с намерением... приближаясь к лесу Шантилли, где считалось, что несколько хороших призы могут ждать нас. Ничто не сравнится с моим отчаянием от того. обязана сопровождать таких людей, и я решила расстаться с ними. как только смогу сделать это без риска. На следующий день мы сильно упал от Лувра, спал под стогами сена; я чувствовал, что нуждался в том. Поддержка Дюбуа и хотела провести ночь рядом с ней; но она казалось, что она планировала использовать его иначе, чем защищать меня. добродетель от нападений, которых я боялся; трое из воров, окруженных она и на моих глазах отвратительное существо отдало себя все трое одновременно. Четвертый подошел ко мне; это был тот. Капитан. Милая Тереза, я надеюсь, вы не откажете мне... по крайней мере, удовольствие провести ночь с тобой? И как он.... воспринимать мое крайнее нежелание, не бояться, он продолжал, мы будем поболтать вместе, и я не буду ничего пытаться без вашей Согласие. Тереза, Тереза, Цвот, плакал, сложив меня на руки, и все. глупость, не знаешь ли, быть таким претенциозным с нами. Почему ты беспокоишься о защите своей чистоты посреди нас? Даже если бы мы согласиться уважать его, не будет ли это совместимо с интересами группу? Не нужно скрывать это от тебя, дорогая, потому что когда мы договоримся. в городах, мы рассчитываем, что вы поймаете нас на дуплерах."

Почему, месье, я ответил, так как я уверен, что должен предпочесть смерть этим ужасам, какая польза я могу принести тебе, и почему ты Против моего рейса? Конец связи.

Мы определенно выступаем против этого, моя девочка; Кур-де-Фер снова присоединился, и вы... должны служить или нашим удовольствиям, или нашим интересам; ваша бедность.... налагает на тебя иго, и ты должен приспособиться к нему. Но Тереза, и ты же знаешь, в этом мире нет ничего такого. не может быть как-то устроено: так что слушайте меня и примите то. управление собственной судьбой: соглашайся жить со мной, дорогая девочка, соглашайся принадлежать мне и быть по-настоящему моей собственной, и я пощажу тебя. ...и зловещая роль, ради которой вы предназначаетесь.

Я, сэр, становлюсь любовницей Цитаты.

Скажи слово, Тереза: негодяй, а? О, я признаю. но у меня нет других названий, чтобы предложить тебе, что наш род не может жениться на тебе, несомненно, хорошо известно: брак - это один из тех. таинства, Тереза, и полные неизбирательного презрения по отношению к их всех, и никого мы никогда не беспокоим. Тем не менее, будь немного что рано или поздно ты потеряешь то, что так дорого для тебя. неизбежная необходимость, поэтому не лучше ли было бы принести его в жертву одинокому человеку, который после этого станет твоей опорой. и защитником, это не лучше, чем быть проституткой. все?"

"Но почему, должно быть, я ответил, что у меня нет другого выхода. альтернатива? Цитирую;

Потому что, Тереза, у нас есть ты, и потому что чем сильнее.... всегда была лучшая причина; Ла Фонтен сделал это замечание давным-давно. Честно говоря, он продолжал быстро, разве это не смешно? экстравагантность, чтобы присвоить, как вы это делаете, такую большую ценность для большинства. бесперспективным? Как девушка может быть настолько глупой, что поверить. что добродетель может зависеть от несколько большего или меньшего диаметра. одной из ее физических частей? Какое это имеет значение для Бога. или мужчина, нетронута ли эта часть или подделана? Я пойду далее: намерение природы состоит в том, чтобы каждый индивидуум исполнить на этой земле все цели, ради которых он был. сформировавшиеся, и женщины существуют только для того, чтобы доставлять удовольствие мужчинам, это то. чтобы просто возмутить ее, тем самым сопротивляться намерению, которое она имеет в твоих руках. уважение. Это желание быть существом бесполезным в этом мире. следовательно, один презрительный. Эта химерная пристойность, которую они имели абсурдность представить вам как добродетель, и что именно, с младенчества, далеко не полезен для природы и общества. очевидное пренебрежение тем и другим, эта пристойность, я говорю, в том. не более, чем предосудительная упрямство, с которым человек. храбрым и полным интеллекта, каким вы не должны хотеть быть. виновен. Неважно, продолжай выслушивать меня, дорогая девочка, я собираюсь доказать мое желание угодить тебе и уважать твою слабость. Я буду ни в коем случае не прикасайтесь к призраку, Терезе, чье владение вызывает весь твой восторг; девушка может сделать несколько одолжений, и... можно предложить Венере во многих храмах; я буду доволен тем. самая посредственная; знаешь, моя дорогая, рядом с кипрским алтарем есть расположите неясный грот, в который уходит Любовь, тем более... чтобы соблазнить нас: таков будет алтарь, где я сожгу. мой фимиам; никаких неудобств, Тереза; если беременность поражает. ты, разве не так они могут появиться, никогда не будет твоя симпатичная фигура будет деформирована таким образом; дева так дорожила девой. вы будете сохранены невредимыми, и для чего бы вам ни понадобилось... если вы решите его поставить, вы можете предложить его недостижимым. Ничто не может предать девушку из этого квартала, какой бы грубой или многократной она ни была. могут быть приступы, как только пчела перестанет сосать пыльцу, Каликс розы снова закроется; никто и представить себе не мог. были открыты. Есть девушки, которые знают десять лет удовольствия. таким образом, даже с несколькими мужчинами, женщины, которые были так же замужем. как и все остальные, и в брачные ночи они доказали. такой девственницей, какой только можно пожелать. Сколько отцов, сколько отцов.... множество братьев так мудро издевались над своими дочерьми. без того, чтобы последние становились на этом основании сестрами. менее достойной поздней девственной жертвоприношения! Сколько исповедателей имеют не использовали один и тот же путь к удовлетворению, без родителей. испытывая легчайшее беспокойство; одним словом, это тайна того. приют, это там, где он соединяется с любовью через узы. осторожность.... Должен ли я рассказать тебе далее, Тереза, что хотя это самый тайный храм, каким бы сладострастным он ни был. необходимое для счастья, не найдено больше нигде, и эта просторная и просторная... родной для соседней диафрагмы, намного меньше, чем то. Пикантное очарование местности, в которую не входишь, не обойдя стороной. где человек живет только ценой какой-нибудь неприятности; сами женщины получают от этого выгоду, и те, кто причина заставляет знать это разнообразие удовольствий, никогда не сосна после того. других. Попробуй, Тереза, попробуй, и мы оба будем довольны тем.."

 

8.

 

 

"О, месье, я ответил: "У меня нет опыта в этом деле, но я не знаю. слышали, что это извращение, которое вы рекомендуете оскорблять женщин. в еще более деликатной манере..... Это еще более оскорбительно. Природа. Небесная рука мстит ей в этом. Sodom приводит пример."

;

.

Какая невиновность, моя дорогая, какое ребячество, кавычки, либертина... в ответ; кто тебе когда-нибудь говорил такое? Еще чуть-чуть больше внимание, Тереза, позвольте мне внести коррективы в ваши идеи.

Пустая трата семени, предназначенная для увековечивания человека. родная девочка, это единственное преступление, которое может существовать Ä это то. гипотеза; согласно ей, это семя вложено в нас как единственное. цель размножения, и если бы это было правдой, я бы разрешил вам что отвлечение внимания - это преступление. Но как только будет доказано, что ее размещение этой спермы в наших чреслах недостаточно для того. что цель Природы состоит в том, чтобы иметь все это. занятых воспроизводством, какая тогда разница, Тереза, неважно, будет ли это разлито в том или ином месте или в другом? Человек, который отвлекает его от выполнения большего зла, чем природа, которая не нанимает на работу. все это? Разве те естественные потери, которые мы можем имитировать, не так ли? мы, пожалуйста, встречаемся в большом количестве случаев? Сама наша способность спровоцировать их, во-первых, является первым доказательством того, что они не оскорбляют. Природа в малейшей степени. Это противоречило бы всем принципам справедливости и справедливости. глубокая мудрость, которую мы повсюду признаем в ее законах. позвольте, что могло бы оскорбить ее; во-вторых, эти потери происходят сотни миллионов раз в день, и она провоцирует их. себя; ночные загрязнения, бесполезность спермы во время периодах беременности женщины, не разрешены ли они ее законами, предписанные им, и разве они не доказывают, что очень мало заботятся о том. за то, что может быть результатом этой жидкости, к которой мы так глупо привязываемся. несоразмерно большую стоимость, она позволяет нам тратить ее на те же самые отходы. безразличие само по себе приводит к тому, что каждый день все пропадает даром. терпимо относится к размножению, да, но многое хочет доказать. воспроизводство - одно из ее намерений; она позволяет нам двигаться дальше. воспроизводясь, чтобы быть уверенным, но это не более чем в ее пользу. если мы воздержимся от этого, выбор, который мы сделаем, будет таким же. ее. Разве не ясно, что оставить нам власть творить, а не созидать. создавать или уничтожать, мы не будем радовать ее или разочаровывать. она больше не принимает по отношению к тому или иному человеку такое отношение. что нам больше всего подходит, и что может быть более очевидным, чем то. курс, который мы выбираем, будучи лишь результатом ее власти над нами. влияние ее действий на нас, несомненно, будет гораздо более приятным. чем это может навредить ей. А, Тереза! Поверь мне, природа! очень мало волнуется из-за тех тайн, в которых мы настолько глупы, что не знаем. превратиться в поклонение ей. Каким бы ни был храм, в котором он ни находился. жертвуя собой, она сразу же позволяет сжечь ладан, один. может быть уверен, что дань уважения не оскорбит ее мудрости; отказывается продюсировать, отходы спермы, использованной на производстве, уничтожение этого. семена, когда они прорастают, уничтожение этого зародыша даже длительное... после его образования, все эти, Тереза, являются вымышленными преступлениями, которые не представляют интереса для природы и над которыми она насмехается так же, как над тем. всех остальных наших учреждений, которые оскорбляют чаще, чем они. служить ей. И цитировать;

Кур-де-Фер согрелся воском, объясняя свои вероломные пословицы, и вскоре я снова увидела его в таком напуганном состоянии. накануне вечером, для того, чтобы дать ему дополнительный урок. сразу же захотел присоединиться к практике для наставления; и, мое сопротивление но его руки сбились с пути к алтарю. предатель хотел проникнуть..... Должен ли я заявить, мадам, что..., ослепленный соблазнами нечестивого человека, довольствуясь тем, что сдался... мало, чтобы сохранить то, что казалось более важным; не отражая ни то, ни другое. ни на нелогичность его дел, ни на то, кем я был сам. с тех пор, как нечестный парень, обладающий гигантским... не имели даже возможности увидеть женщину в большинстве случаев. разрешенное место, и поскольку, по настоянию его родного извращенца. уж точно не было ничего, кроме как калечить меня; мои глаза, как я говорю, совершенно слепой ко всему этому, я собирался оставить себя и.... стали преступниками благодаря добродетели; моя оппозиция ослабевала; уже сейчас... хозяин трона, наглый завоеватель сконцентрировал все свои силы... энергии для того, чтобы утвердиться на ней; и затем появились услышал звук вагона, движущегося по шоссе. На мгновенно отказывается от своих удовольствий ради исполнения своих обязанностей. собирает своих последователей и летит к новым преступлениям. Вскоре после этого, мы слышим крики, и эти бандиты, весь окровавленный, возвращаются. триумфальным и обремененным трофеями.

&p>&cot;Давайте умно расшифровывать, &cot; говорит Ку-де-Фер, мы убили трех человек. Мужчины, трупы в пути, мы больше не в безопасности. разделен, Ку-де-Фер хочет, чтобы я получил свою долю; дело доходит до того. 20 луи, что я вынужден принять. Я дрожу от страха перед тем. Обязанность брать такие деньги, но мы все спешим. забирает его вещи и уходит.

На следующий день мы окажемся в опасности и окажемся в лесу... Шантилли, во время ужина мужчины считают, что их последняя операция - не стоило им того, и оценить общий захват не больше. чем двести луи.

Действительно, один из них говорит, что не стоило беспокоиться о том. совершить три убийства за такую небольшую сумму. "

Мягко говоря, друзья мои, ответы Дюбуа, это было не ради того. их сумочки, я умолял вас не жалеть путешественников, это было.... исключительно в интересах нашей безопасности; в этом виноват закон. эти преступления - не наша вина, пока воров повесят. как и убийцы, кражи никогда не совершаются без того. убийств. Оба преступления наказываются одинаково; почему же тогда.... воздержаться от второй, когда она может прикрыть первую? Что заставляет более того, вы полагаете, что ужасное существо продолжило. Сто луи не стоят трех убийств? Никто никогда не должен оценивать ценности, за исключением наших собственных интересов. Прекращение существование жертв ничто по сравнению с продолжающимся существованием наша, а не клещ, имеет ли для нас значение, является ли кто-либо из нас живым или в могиле; следовательно, если одно из двух дел включает в себя то, что самым незначительным образом влияет на наше благосостояние, мы должны... совершенно не раскаяние, определите, что будет в нашу пользу. совершенно безразличное дело, мы должны, если у нас есть хоть капля ума. хозяина ситуации, несомненно, действовать так, чтобы превратить ее в прибыльной стороной, полностью пренебрегая тем, что может случиться с нами. противник; ибо нет рациональной соразмерности между тем. влияет на нас и то, что влияет на других; сначала мы чувствуем физически, Другое касается только морали, и нравственные чувства создаются для того. обманывать; ничто, кроме физических ощущений, не является подлинным; таким образом, не только двухсот Луисов хватит на три убийства, но даже тридцати хватит. сантимов было бы достаточно, для тех 30 сантимов было бы достаточно. принесли удовлетворение, которое, хотя и легкое, но обязательно должно быть затрагивают нас в гораздо более оживленной степени, чем трое мужчин. убитыми, не имеющими ничего общего с нами, и злодеяниями, совершенными теми, кем мы являемся... ни капли не тронут, нет, даже не поцарапан; наша органика беззаботность, небрежность мышления, проклятые предрассудки, в которых мы находимся. были воспитаны, тщетные ужасы религии и закона, это то. что мешает идиотам и сбивает с толку их преступную карьеру, это то. что мешает им достичь величия, но все сильные и сильные. здоровый человек, наделенный энергично организованным разумом, который предпочитает себя другим, как он должен, будет знать, как взвешивать. их интересы в противовес собственным интересам, будут смеяться над Богом. человечество до дьявола, будет смеяться над законом и смеяться над законом. осознавая, что он должен быть верен самому себе, что все сам по себе. должны быть измерены, будет чувствовать, что самое большое количество зол. нанесение вреда другим людям не может компенсировать наименьших потерь в удовольствии или быть таким же важным, как и его малейшее удовольствие, приобретенное неслыханное количество злодеев. Радость ему нравится, она в нём, она в нём. его собственное, преступное действие не касается его, оно внешне его; ну, я... спросите, какому думающему человеку не понравится то, что вызывает у него восхищение. к тому, что ему чуждо? Кто не согласится совершить это деяние? откуда ~ он не испытывает ничего неприятного, для того, чтобы получить то. наиболее приятно двигает его.?"

"О, мадам, " Я сказал Дюбуа, попросил ее разрешения ответить ей. исполнительных министерств, вы вообще не чувствуете, что ваше проклятье написано в том, что вы только что произнесли? Самое большее, что может случиться. принципы могут подойти человеку, обладающему достаточной властью. нечего бояться от других, но мы, мадам, постоянно в страхе. и унижены; мы, по приказу всех честных людей, осужденные каждый закон, должны ли мы быть выразителями доктрин, которые могут только когда лезвие меча висело над нашими головами? Найдем ли мы мы оказались в таком несчастливом положении, когда оказались в центре общества; если бы мы были там, где, то есть, мы должны были бы быть, без нашей проступок и избавление от наших страданий, вам не кажется. может нам больше подойти? Как ты мог заставить его не умереть. который через слепой эгоизм хочет бороться с тем. объединенные интересы других людей? Разве общество не вправе никогда не страдать. посреди человека, который объявляет себя враждебным ему? И может ли изолированная индивидуальная борьба против всех? Может ли он льстить себе. он будет счастлив и спокоен, если откажется подчиниться обществу. контракт, он не соглашается отказаться от своего счастья. чтобы застраховать остальное? Общество поддерживается только непрерывно. обмен мнениями и добрыми делами - это узы. которые укрепляют здания, например, тот, кто вместо положительных действий не предлагает ничего, кроме преступлений, которые, следовательно, должны бояться. обязательно подвергнется нападению, если он будет самым сильным, затаившимся от сначала он обижается, если он самый слабый, но в любом случае уничтожен, ибо в человеке есть сильный инстинкт, который заставляет его охранять его мир и покой и наносить удары тому, кто хочет. беспокоить их; вот почему долголетняя выносливость преступника ассоциации практически невозможны: их благополучие внезапно становится невозможным Столкнувшись с холодной сталью, все остальные должны незамедлительно объединиться для того, чтобы притупить угрожающий момент. Даже между нами, мадам, я осмеливаюсь добавить: как ты можешь заставить себя поверить, что можешь поддерживать согласие между собой, когда вы советуете каждому прислушиваться только к тому. свои собственные интересы? Есть ли у вас какие-нибудь справедливые претензии. против одного из нас, который хотел перерезать горло другим, которые сделали это, чтобы монополизировать то, что было разделено между ними. коллегами? Почему, это великолепный панегирик для добродетели. доказывают свою необходимость даже в криминальном обществе... чтобы доказать... уверенность в том, что это общество распадется в три раза. не поддерживается Virtue!"

Твои возражения, Тереза, не тезисы, а слова Кура-де-Фера. Дюбуа объясняет, это изощренные министерства; наш преступник. братства ни в коей мере не поддерживаются Добродетелью; скорее, они поддерживаются Добродетелью. эгоизм, эгоизм, эгоизм, эгоизм; эта хвалебная речь Девы, которую ты произносишь. сфабрикованы из ложной гипотезы, выкидышей; это не в том. и все это благодаря добродетели, которая, веря себе, давайте предположим, самая сильная из группы, я не использую кинжал на товарищей по команде. для присвоения их долей, потому что, после этого, находки в одиночку, я бы лишил себя средств, которые гарантируют. то состояние, которое я ожидаю получить с их помощью; так же, как и то. единственный мотив, который удерживает их от поднятия рук. против меня Теперь этот мотив, как и ты, Тереза, совершенно верен. наблюдает, чисто эгоистичен и не имеет даже малейшего представления о том. добродетель; тот, кто хочет бороться в одиночку против интересов общества. должен, вы говорите, ожидать смерти; не будет ли он более чем уверен в том. погибнет, если, чтобы позволить ему существовать здесь, у него не останется ничего, кроме своего. страданий и брошен другими? Что можно сказать, что интересы общество - это просто масса объединенных индивидуальных интересов, но оно это никогда иначе, чем уступкой того, что эти частные интересы могут приспособиться и сочетаться с общими интересами; ну, что ж. ты заставил его уступить того, у кого нет ничего, от чего он мог бы отказаться? И тот, у кого много? Согласитесь, что он должен увидеть, как его ошибка будет быстро расти вместе с обнаружив, что он давал гораздо больше, чем получал. возврата; и, в таком случае, согласиться с тем, что несправедливость сделка должна помешать ему заключить ее. В ловушке этого дилемма, лучшее, что осталось для этого человека, не согласен ли ты, это то. бросить это несправедливое общество, уйти в другое место и согласиться. прерогативы для другого общества мужчин, которые, поместив их в ситуацию, сравнимую с его, заинтересованы в борьбе, посредством координации своих меньших полномочий, более широкие слои населения власть, которая хотела вытащить из бедняги то малое, что он хотел... одержимый в обмен на пустоту. Но оттуда ты скажешь. родится состояние вечной войны. Отлично! Разве это не так? вечное состояние природы? Разве это не единственный штат, в котором мы находимся. действительно адаптированы? Все люди рождаются изолированными, завистливыми, жестокими и жестокими. деспотичным; желающим иметь все и ничего не сдаваться, неустанно борясь за свои права или добиваясь их реализации их амбиции, законодатель подходит и говорит им: Прекратите так чтобы сражаться; если бы каждый немного отступил, спокойствие восстановилось бы. Я не нахожу никакой ошибки в позиции, подразумеваемой в соглашении, но я считаю. утверждают, что два вида индивидуумов не могут и не должны подчиняться никогда; тем, кто чувствует себя сильнее, нет нужды отказываются от всего, чтобы быть счастливыми, и те, кто оказался в беде. тем слабее оказываются и те, кто отказывается от бесконечно большего, чем то. уверяет их. Однако общество состоит только из слабых людей. и сильным; ну, если пакт должен вызвать недовольство как слабых, так и слабых. сильный, есть веские основания полагать, что он не подойдет. общества, и ранее существовавшее состояние войны должно выглядеть следующим образом бесконечно предпочтительнее, так как это позволило всем свободно заниматься спортом. о его силе и промышленности, в результате чего он обнаружил бы себя. лишённого несправедливого общественного договора, который требует слишком многого от общества. один и никогда не дает друг другу достаточно согласия; следовательно, истинно... умный человек - это тот, кто, безразличный к риску обновления. состояние войны, царившее до заключения контракта. безвозвратное нарушение этого контракта, нарушает его настолько же сильно, насколько и часто, насколько он в состоянии, полностью уверен, что то, что он получит от этого. Разрывы всегда будут важнее, чем то, что он потеряет. принадлежит к более слабому классу, ибо он был таким, каким был, когда уважал договор; нарушив его, он может стать одним из тех. сильнее; и если закон вернет его в класс, откуда он захочет. ...самое худшее, что может случиться с ним - это потерять жизнь, и это несчастье бесконечно меньше, чем то, что существует в оскорбление и убожество. Тогда есть две доступные вакансии для нас: либо преступление, которое делает нас счастливыми, либо петля. предотвращает нас от несчастья. Я спрашиваю, может ли быть что-нибудь. нерешительность, милая Тереза, и где же твой маленький разум найдет аргумент, способный бороться с этим?"

 

9.

 

"О, месье, " Я ответила страстью, что хорошее дело вдохновляет, Существует тысяча, но должна ли эта жизнь быть единственной заботой человека? Разве это существование отличается от прохода, каждый из этапов которого должен быть только если у него есть разумные основания вести его к этому вечному блаженству, приз, полученный от "Виртуозы"? Полагаю, вместе с тобой (но... это, однако, редкость, противоречит всем доводам, но неважно), я на мгновение дам тебе понять, что злодей... который бросает себя на произвол судьбы, может быть счастлив от этого. но представляете ли вы себе, что Божья справедливость не ждет того. нечестный человек, которому не придётся платить в другом мире за то. что он в этом делает? А! Не думайте наоборот, месье, поверьте. Нет, " Я добавил, слезы на глазах, " это несчастье. единственное утешение, не отнимите его у нас; брошенное человечеством, которое.... отомстит за нас, если не Бог.

Кто? Никто, Тереза, абсолютно никто; это неразумно. чтобы отомстить несчастным; они льстят сами себе. с идеей, потому что они хотели бы быть комфортнее. но не в этом смысле, чем меньше ложь: тем лучше, тем лучше. крайне важно, чтобы несчастные страдали; их унижение, унижение. страдания включены в то, что декреты природы, и их несчастные. наличие является полезным для общей схемы, так же как и наличие системы процветание, которое их сокрушает; такова истина, которая должна подавлять раскаяние в душе тирана или злоумышленника; пусть не раскаивается. сдерживать себя; пусть слепо, бездумно предаст себя. причинять всякую боль, ради которой в нём может родиться идея. только голос Природы, который подсказывает эту идею; это единственное. как она делает нас исполнителями своих законов. Когда ее секрет вдохновения склоняют нас ко злу, она хочет зла, она хочет зла, она хочет зла. она требует, чтобы сумма преступлений не была полной. достаточную для законов равновесия, единственные законы, по которым она является управляемая, она требует, чтобы были преступления, чтобы одеть весы; поэтому позвольте ему не бояться, не останавливаться на достигнутом, чей мозг - и его не слушали, пусть он безучастно совершает ошибку. он распознает импульсивность, только запаздывая и притупляя его. возмущает природу. Но давайте ненадолго проигнорируем этику. теологию, которую ты хочешь. Имейте в виду, молодой невиновный, что... религия, на которую ты опираешься, будучи ничем иным, как отношениями. между человеком и Богом, только почитание существа думает. сам обязан показать своему создателю, мгновенно уничтожено ли это. существование создателя само по себе доказано иллюзорно. Примитивный человек, испуганный явлениями, которые его беспокоили, обязательно должен был верят, что возвышенное существо, незнакомое ему, направляет его их деятельность и влияние; слабость заключается в предположении. силу и бояться его; человеческий разум, то слишком много в нем. младенчество, чтобы исследовать, открыть в глубинах природы законы движение, уникальные пружины всего механизма, который поразил его. с трепетом обнаружил, что проще представить себе мотор в этом Природе, чем рассматривать природу как свою собственную движущую силу, не считая, что он будет должны приложить гораздо больше усилий, чтобы назидать, определить этот гигантский... чем через изучение природы, чтобы найти причину того. поразил его, он признал, что это суверенное существо, он разработал ритуалы поклонения ему: с этого момента каждый народ составлял сам себя. повелитель в соответствии со своими особыми характеристиками, свойствами. знания и климат, вскоре появилось столько религий. Земля, как расы и народы, и вскоре после этого, столько богов, сколько богов. семьи; тем не менее, за всеми этими идолами было легко признают ту же самую абсурдную иллюзию, первый плод человеческой слепоты. Они одевались по-разному, но это всегда было одно и то же. Ну, скажи мне, Тереза, просто потому, что эти идиоты болтают глупости. о возведении жалкой химеры и о способе действия служить ему, должно быть, из этого следует, что интеллигентный мужчина должен отречься от определённого и настоящего счастья жизни, как у Эзопа. собака, должен ли он бросить кость ради тени и отречься от своего настоящего. радости от галлюцинаций? Нет, Тереза, нет, нет никакого Бога, нет природы. достаточно для себя; ни в чем мудром не нуждается она в писателе; однажды... предполагалось, что автор - ничто иное, как распавшаяся версия самой себя. просто то, что мы описываем в школе фразой, умоляя о том. вопрос. Бог предсказывает создание, т.е. мгновение. когда ничего не было, или мгновение, когда все было в хаосе. Если или другие из этих состояний были злыми, почему твой Бог позволил ему выжить? Было ли это хорошо? Тогда почему он изменил его? Но если все сейчас так и есть. наконец-то, вашему Богу больше нечем заняться, если он хорош. бесполезным, как он может быть могущественным? И если он не могущественный, как он может он будет Богом? Если, одним словом, природа движется сама по себе, чего мы хотим от того. Двигатель? И если он действует на вещество, заставляя его двигаться, как это само по себе не материально? Можете ли вы представить себе эффект от разум на материю и материю, получая движение от разума. не двигается? Исследуйте на предмет одного хладнокровного мгновения всех тех. смехотворные и противоречивые качества, которыми обладают изготовители эта исполнимая химера была вынуждена одеть его; проверьте. как они противоречат друг другу, аннулируют друг друга, и вы поймете, что этот божественный фантом, порожденный боязнь некоторых и невежество всех, это просто отвратительно. блаженство, которое от нас не заслуживает ни мгновения веры, ни минутный осмотр; жалкая экстравагантность, отвратительное отношение к тому. отвратительно для сердца, которое никогда не должно было исходить из того. темноту, чтобы погрузиться обратно в неё, навсегда утонуть.

Пусть надежда или страх перед грядущим миром вырастет из тех.... первозданная ложь, неприятности, Тереза, и прежде всего сдаться. пытаясь выковывать для нас средства сдерживания из этого материала. Слабый части гнусной грубой материи, после нашей смерти, то есть, от слияния элементов, из которых мы составлены. элементы, составляющие универсальную массу, уничтоженные навсегда, независимо от того, каким бы ни было наше поведение, мы пройдем через мгновенно попадает в тигр природы, оттуда снова появляется под другой. и что у него больше нет никаких прерогатив. который безумно курил чучело Виртуи, чем для другого, кто курил чучело Виртуи. в самых постыдных эксцессах, потому что нет ничего, с помощью чего можно было бы Природа оскорблена и потому, что все мужчины, в равной степени и ее утроба, в течение срока своих полномочий действовали совсем не иначе, как в соответствии с ее импульсы, с которыми все они столкнутся после своего существования, и один и тот же конец, и одна и та же судьба. Извините.

Я как раз собирался ответить на эти ужасные богохульства... когда мы услышали шум всадника неподалеку.

&p>&cot;To arms !&cot;; закричал Куор-де-Фер, более жаждущий поставить свои системы а не для укрепления их базы.

Мужчины прыгают в жизнь... и мгновение спустя им не повезло... путешественника привели в полицейский участок, где мы разбили лагерь. Опрошенный по мотиву, по которому он путешествовал один и так рано оказался за границей, по возрасту, профессии, всадник ответил, что его зовут... Сен-Флорент, один из самых важных купцов Лиона, что он... было тридцать шесть лет, что он возвращался из Фландрии. где он занимался делами, связанными с его бизнесом, что у него не так уж и много денег, но у него было. ценные бумаги. Он добавил, что его камердинер покинул его накануне. и что, чтобы избежать жары, он путешествовал ночью. намерение добраться до Парижа на следующий день, где он доберется до Парижа. и заключил бы некоторые из своих сделок, более того, он шел по незнакомой дороге, и, видимо, он... должно быть, заблудился, когда дремал на лошади. И, сказав что в обмен на все, что у него есть, он попросил о своей жизни. Его сумочка была проверена, деньги подсчитаны, приз не мог быть получен были лучше. Сен-Флорент имел почти полмиллиона, оплачиваемая по требованию в столице, имела также несколько драгоценных камней и примерно 100 золотых луидов.....

"Друг, " сказал Кур-де-Фер, хлопая пистолетом в пистолет Нос Сен-Флорента, ты ведь понимаешь, что после того, как у тебя появился ограбил тебя, мы не можем оставить тебя в живых.

О, месье, я заплакал, бросившись к ногам злодея. умоляю тебя не устраивать мне ужасное зрелище. приём в вашу группу, о смерти этого бедняги; позвольте ему в прямом эфире, не отказывай мне в первой просьбе, о которой я прошу тебя.

И быстро прибегая к самой необычной уловке, чтобы оправдать... интерес, который я проявил к пленнику:

Имя, которое только что дал себе месье, я добавил с теплом, заставляет меня поверить, что мы почти родственники. Не удивляйся, Месье, я продолжил, обращаясь к "Вояджеру". удивлен нахождением родственника в таких обстоятельствах; я объясню. все это для тебя. В свете этого, " я продолжил, еще раз. умоляя нашего шефа, в свете этого, месье, предоставьте мне жизнь невезучего существа, я покажу свою благодарность за услугу. полную преданность болезни, которая сможет служить вам. Интересы. "

Ты знаешь, при каких условиях я могу предоставить тебе то, что ты просишь, Тереза, ты знаешь, чего я требую от тебя? ты.... "

Очень хорошо, месье, я сделаю все, что смогу, я заплакала, бросаясь между Сент-Флорентом и нашим лидером, который был все еще собираюсь убить его. Да, я сделаю все, что угодно; пощажу его.

Дайте ему жить, но он должен присоединиться к нам, что последний пункт очень важен, я ничего не могу поделать, если он откажется подчинись ему, мои товарищи были бы против меня.

Удивлен, купец, ничего не понимающий в этом. кровосмешение, которое я устанавливал, но наблюдение за его жизнью, спасшейся, если он согласиться с предложением, не видя причин для того. колебания. Ему обеспечили мясом и напитками, так как мужчины желают покинуть это место до рассвета.

Тереза, Тереза, Кур-де-Фер сказал мне, я напоминаю тебе. обещаю, но раз уж я устал сегодня ночью, спокойно отдохни рядом с Дюбуа, Я позову тебя к рассвету, и если ты не придешь вовремя, лишение жизни этого плута будет моей местью за ваш обман. Извините.

Спите спокойно, месье, спокойно спите, я ответил, и считаю. Которого вы наполнили благодарностью, не имеет ничего другого желания, кроме как отплатить ему;

Как бы то ни было, это было так далеко от моего замысла, потому что, если бы я когда-либо верил. обман разрешен, именно в этом случае. Наши негодяи, слишком самоуверенные, продолжали пить и попадали в дремлет, оставляя меня на свободе рядом с Дюбуа, который, пьяный... как и другие, вскоре тоже закрыла глаза.

Используюсь этой возможностью, как только бандиты, окружающие нас. были преодолены сном:

Месье, я сказал молодым лионцам, самым страшным. катастрофа бросила меня против моей воли посреди всего этого. воры, я ненавижу их обоих и смертельный момент, который принес мне в их компанию. По правде говоря, я не имею чести иметь отношения к тому. Я использовал трюк, чтобы спасти тебя и сбежать, если ты одобряешь. это, с тобой, из этих негодяев, из их лап... благоприятные, я добавил, дайте нам уйти; я заметил вашу книжку, возьмите с собой вернуть, забыть деньги, они у них в карманах, мы не могли. верните его без опасности: месье, давайте уйдем отсюда. Ты видишь, что я делаю для тебя, я отдаю себя в твои руки; пожалейте меня; прежде всего, будьте не более жестоки, чем эти люди; послушайте меня. уважать мою честь, я доверяю это вам, это мое уникальное сокровище, они не разоряли его от меня."

 

10.

 

 

Было бы трудно сделать заявления с выражением признательности. из Сент-Флорента. Он не знал, в каких терминах выразить свою благодарность; но у нас не было времени на разговоры, это был вопрос полета. С ловким движением, я достаю бумажник, возвращаю его ему. тихо проступая, мы идем через копс, оставляя лошадь для боясь, что звук его копыт может разбудить людей; со всем возможным. мы достигнем пути, который выведет нас из леса. Мы повезло остаться в стороне к рассвету. за которым следует кто угодно; до десяти часов мы были в Лузарче и... там, свободные от всякого беспокойства, мы думали только о том, чтобы отдохнуть. мы сами

В жизни бывают моменты, когда обнаруживаешь, что, несмотря на то. богатства, которые могут быть велики, но, тем не менее, не хватает того, что необходимо для того. в прямом эфире; так было в случае Сен-Флорента: пятьсот тысяч франков. может быть, ждет его в Париже, но у него на руках не было ни монеты. человек, помня об этом, он сделал паузу перед входом в гостиницу......

Полегче, месье; я сказал, когда почувствовал его смущение, Воры не оставили меня без денег, вот двадцать луи, возьми их, пожалуйста, используй их, отдай то, что осталось бедным, ничего. в мире может заставить меня захотеть сохранить золото, полученное с помощью программы "Убийство и цитирование";

Сент-Флорент, чьи уточнения характера я в то время делал. не совсем оценил, был абсолютно не готов принять то, что я принимаю. выставил его на продажу, спросил, чего я от него жду, сказал, что готов. обязать себя исполнить их, и что он ничего не хочет, кроме как право оправдывать свою задолженность передо мной.

Именно перед тобой я обязан своей жизнью и состоянием, Тереза и Цвот, добавил он, целуя мои руки, я не могу ничего лучше, чем положить их обоих к тебе. ноги, примите их, умоляю вас, и позвольте Богу выйти замуж. затянуть узлы дружбы. "

.

Я не знаю, было ли это от интуиции или холодности характера, но я был так далек от того, чтобы верить, что то, что я сделал для молодежи. человек мог бы мотивировать такие чувства, как те, которые он для меня выразил, что я позволил ему прочитать в моем лице отказ, который я не осмелился прочитать. ясно выразился; он понял, не настаивал на дальнейшем и ограничивал себя. чтобы спросить, что он может сделать для меня.

Месье, сказал я, если мое поведение действительно не безосновательно... по вашему мнению, за всю мою компенсацию я прошу всего лишь поехать с тобой в Лион и найти мне место в каком-нибудь месте. правильный дом, где моей скромности больше нечего будет страдать. "

Ты не сможешь сделать ничего лучше, - сказал Сен-Флорент, - и никто не может... в лучшем положении, чем я, чтобы оказывать эту услугу; у меня двадцать человек. родственники в городе, " и молодой трейдер тогда уговорил меня рассказать о причинах моего отъезда из Парижа, о котором я упоминал. его я родился. Я рассказал свою историю с такой же степенью уверенности и уверенности. изобретательность.

О, если это так, - сказал молодой человек, - я буду полезен для того. прежде чем мы доберемся до Лиона; не бойся, Тереза, твои неприятности закончены; роман затихнет, тебя не будут искать и..., тем более, в приюте, где я хочу тебя оставить, меньше, чем в любом другом. другое. Член моей семьи живет недалеко от Бонди, очаровательного региона. недалеко отсюда; я уверен, что ей будет приятно получить ты с ней, я представлю тебя завтра. И цитирую.

В свою очередь, исполненная благодарности, я одобряю проект, который кажется. так мне подходит; мы отдыхаем в "Лузарчесе" до конца дня. и завтра, это наш план, мы получим Бонди, но шесть... далекие лиги.

Погода хорошая, - говорит Сен-Флоран, - поверь мне, Тереза, будет очень приятно идти пешком, мы доберемся до моего... поместье родственников, расскажет о наших приключениях. прибытие, я думаю, заставит тебя появиться в еще большей степени. Интересный свет. "

Не имея ни малейшего подозрения относительно замыслов этого чудовища. далек от того, чтобы представить, что с ним я буду в меньшей безопасности, чем раньше. когда был в печально известной компании, которую я покинул, я согласен на все; мы обедаем вместе; он не столько шепчет, сколько шепчет, когда ночью... возьмите комнату отдельно от его, и после того, как подождете. самая тёплая часть дня прошла, точно так же, как и то, что он мне говорил. четырех или пяти часов хватит, чтобы отвезти нас к его родственникам. оставить Лузарчеса и отправиться пешком к Бонди.

Это было около четырех часов дня, когда мы вошли лес. До этого Сен-Флорент ни разу не противоречил себе: всегда одно и то же достоинство, всегда одно и то же стремление доказать свою правоту. чувства ко мне; мне не следовало думать, что я чувствую себя в большей безопасности. Я был со своим отцом. Тени ночи стали спускаться на землю. лес и внушать религиозный ужас. порождает страх в робких духах и преступных проектах. в яростных сердцах. Мы шли по простым тропам, я шел вперёд, и я повернулся, чтобы спросить Сент-Флорента, были ли эти туманные тропы действительно те, за которыми мы должны следить, был ли у него шанс. не потерял рассудок, думал ли он, что мы приедем. скоро.

Мы прибыли, шлюха, и злодей ответил, свергнув меня... удар его тростью по голове, я потерял сознание.... О, мадам, я понятия не имею, что сказал или сделал этот человек после этого, но.... состояние, в котором я был, когда вернулся в сознание, подсказывало мне тоже самое. до какой степени я была его жертвой. Я была самой темной ночью, когда я проснулся; я стоял у подножия дерева, вдали от любой дороги, был ранен, истекая кровью.... позор, мадам; это была награда за все, что я сделал. только что сделала для несчастного человека, и принесла позор его в высшей степени, негодяй, после того, как сделал со мной все, что у него было. хотел бы, после всех злоупотреблений со мной, даже в том, что... большинство возмущений Природа, забрала мою сумочку.... содержащую то же самое. деньги, которые я так щедро предложил ему. Он порвал мою одежду, в основном. лежал в лоскутках и лентах обо мне, я был практически голый, и... несколько частей моего тела были разорваны, разорваны, заколоты; вы можете оценить. моя ситуация: там, в глубине ночи, без ресурсов, без чести, без надежды, без надежды, подвергаясь любой опасности: Я хотел бы поставить конец моим дням: если бы мне подарили оружие, я бы возложил на него руки и сократил эту несчастную жизнь, полную только чумы. для меня... монстр! Что я с ним сделала, я попросила себя. заслужил такое жестокое обращение своими руками? Я спасаю ему жизнь, восстанавливаю его. его состояние, он отбирает самое дорогое для меня! A дикое животное было бы менее жестоким! О, чувак, так это ты, когда ты не слушаешь ничего, кроме своих страстей! Тигры, обитающие в самых диких местах. джунгли перепелились бы раньше таких позоров.... эти первые куски Страдания увенчались несколькими минутами истощения; мои глаза, переполненный слезами, механически повернутый к небу; мой... сердце вскочило к ногам Мастера, который живет там.... этот сверкающий свод.... эта внушительная тишина... ночью... тот ужас, который затуманил мои чувства... тот образ Природы... с миром, близко к моей озябшей, обезумевшей душе.... все дистиллировали мрачный ужас, откуда вскоре появилась необходимость помолиться. Я опустился на колени перед тем могущественным Богом, которого отверг... нечестивыми, надеждами бедных и угнетенных.

Святейшее Величество, Святейший Один, я плакал со слезами. этот ужасный момент, чтобы наполнить мою душу небесной радостью, Который, несомненно, помешал мне попытаться покушаться на мою жизнь. Защитник и Наставник мой, Я устремляюсь к щедротам Твоим, умоляю Тебя... милосердие, посмотри на мои страдания и мучения, мою отставку. услышь мои умоляния: Могущественный Бог. Ты знаешь это, я... невинных и слабых, меня предают и плохо обращают; я хотел бы сделать то. подражая Тебе, и воля Твоя наказала его во мне. Да исполнится воля Твоя, Боже мой, все священные дела Твоя лелеяны. Я уважаю их и перестаю жаловаться на них, но если бы я не я не найду ничего, кроме укусов крапивы и крапивы, не так ли? оскорбить Тебя, государь мой, чтобы Ты молил Твоего ренессанса. возьми меня в грудь Твою, чтобы без проблем преклоняться перед Тобой. поклоняйся Тебе подальше от этих порочных людей, которых, увы, Я сотворил. Я встречаюсь только со злом, и чья кровавая и вероломная рука их удовольствие утопить мои горестные дни в потоке слез и в потопе бездну агонии."

Молитва - сладчайшее утешение несчастных; сила возвращается. как только он выполнит свой долг. Моя храбрость возродилась, я вырастил я собрал ветошь, которую злодей оставил мне, и.... Я спрятался в зарослях, чтобы ночь прошла в меньшей опасности. Безопасность, которой, как мне казалось, я наслаждался, удовлетворение, которое я только что получил... на вкус, общаясь с моим Богом, все вместе, чтобы помочь мне отдохнуть. и солнце уже взошло высоко, когда я открыл глаза. Для несчастный момент пробуждения отвратителен: воображение, освеженный сладким сном, очень быстро, и... ужасно наполняется злом в эти моменты обманчивого покоя. канули в небытие.

Очень хорошо, я сказал, что когда я осмотрел себя, это правда. есть человеческие существа Природа опускается до уровня дикой природы. Звери! Спрятавшись в этом лесу, как будто они летают с видом на человека, какая разница между ними и мной сейчас? Стоит ли быть рожденный для такой жалкой судьбы?.... И мои слёзы струились обильно, когда я медитировал в печали; я едва успел закончить свои размышления. когда я услышал, что где-то звучит примерно так: "Постепенно двое мужчин зависают". на виду. Я заткнул уши:

Иди сюда, дорогой друг, скажи, что одно из них, и это место нам подойдет. восхитительно; жестокое и смертельное присутствие тёти, которую я ненавижу, не приведет к тому. помешать мне попробовать с тобой то удовольствие, которое я ценю;

Приближаясь, они выстраиваются прямо передо мной. и настолько близко, что ни одно из их слов, ни одно из их слов. жесты могут ускользнуть от меня, и я наблюдаю... Только небо, мадам, сказала, что Тереза, прерывая себя, возможно ли, что судьба не поставили меня ни в какие другие ситуации, кроме таких критических, что это становится весьма критичным. так же трудно для Добродетели слышать их речи, как и скромность к тому. описать их? Это ужасное преступление, которое одинаково возмущает и то, и другое. Природа и социальные условности, этот отвратительный поступок, одним словом. рука Божья так часто поражалась, рационализировалась, узаконивалась Кур-де-Фер, предложенный им несчастной Терезе, несмотря на то. желания, исполненные против неё мясником, который только что принес с собой кровь. Короче говоря, я видел, как ее отвратительно казнили. на моих глазах, вместе со всеми нечистыми похлопываниями. фумблинг, все ужасные эпизоды самой медитированной развращенности... может придумать. Один из тех, кто отдал себя, был двадцать четыре года. лет, такой осанки и такого присутствия, можно предположить. повышенная степень, другая, примерно того же возраста, похоже, оказалась одного из его домохозяек. Этот акт был скандальным и продолжительным. Сгибание опираясь на руки, опираясь на гребень маленького холм, обращенный к зарослям, где я лежал, молодой хозяин выставил напоказ обнаженный перед своим спутником в разврате на нечестивый жертвенный алтарь, и... Последний, которого зрелище, наполненное рвением, ласкал идола, готовый обезвредить его копьем гораздо более ужасным и гораздо более ужасным. колоссальный, чем тот, с капитаном бандформирований Бонди. угрожал мне, но, не боясь мудрости, молодой господин, казалось. беззастенчиво готовился к храбрости вала, который был подарен он дразнил его, он волновался, волновался, покрывал его поцелуями, хватался за него, погрузился в себя, был в экстазе, когда проглотил его; вызванное преступными ласками, печально известное существо написало. боролся под железом и, похоже, сожалел, что этого не было еще больше. ужасно; он выдержал удары, он встал, чтобы предвидеть их, он поднялся, чтобы предвидеть их. оттолкнул их..... Тендерная пара, связанная законными узами, не смогла бы так страстно ласкали друг друга... их рты были прижаты... вместе, их вздохи смешались, их языки переплетались, и я видел, как каждый из них, пьяный от вожделения, привёл своего предателя. ужасов до конца в самом водовороте восторга. Уважение - и для того, чтобы сжечь ладан, нет ничего, чем можно было бы пренебречь. Тот, кто плачет вслух; поцелуи, пальцы, поцелуи, загрязнения, самые ужасные нюансы разврата, все сводится к тому. используемой для восстановления опускающейся силы, и все это увенчается успехом. реанимировать их пять раз подряд, но без того. кто-то из них меняет его роль. Молодой господин постоянно был тем. и хотя в нем было что-то, что подсказывало. возможность того, что он в свою очередь мог бы вести себя как мужчина. в одно мгновение даже появление желания. Если бы он посетил алтарь, соответствующий тому, в котором приносились жертвы. исполняется в интересах другого идола, и никогда не было никаких признаков того, что последнему угрожали нападениями.

 

11.

 

Ах, как медленно, казалось, проходит время! Я не осмелился уступить из страха перед тем. раскрытие; наконец, преступники в этой непристойной драме, нет... сомнения переполнились, встали и были готовы двигаться дальше по дороге. чтобы отвезти их домой, когда хозяин подошел к кусту, который... спрятал меня; мой капот предал меня... он увидел это.....

Жасмин сказал своему камердинеру, что нас обнаружили.... у одной девушки увидели наши тайны..... Подойди сюда, спусти сучку в открытое пространство, давайте выясним, почему она здесь. Извините.

Я не доставлял им хлопот, вытаскивая меня из моего дома Убежище; я немедленно ступил вперёд и упал к их ногам,

О, месье! Я плакал, протягивая руки к ним, смирился... жалеть несчастное существо, чья судьба заслуживает большего... сострадание, чем вы думаете; несчастий очень мало. может сравняться с моей; не позволяйте осанке, в которой вы обнаружите причину. любое подозрение, что он родился в тебе; скорее, это следствие того. горе, чем мои грехи; не усугубляйте недуги, которые подавляют. я, будьте так добры, что уменьшите их, сделав доступными мне означает избежать фурий, которые преследуют меня. И цитата;

"Граф де Брессак" (так звали молодого человека... чьи руки я упали) обладал разумом, содержащим большой фонд. зла и свободы; не очень обильное сочувствие. обитал в его сердце. К сожалению, это слишком распространено, чтобы обнаружить. люди, в которых жалость была стерта свободой, чьи обыкновенные эффект будет только усиливаться: будет ли это так, что большая часть его излишества требуют апатии души, или того, что сильный шок страсть придаёт нервной системе энергию, снижает её энергию. действие, факт всегда остается фактом, что либертина редко встречается у человека. чувствительность. Но в дополнение к суровости, присущей этому виду. чей характер я набрасываю, был также в месье де. Брессак отвращение к нашему полу настолько заядлое, ненависть настолько сильная.... что отличает меня от других, что я столкнулся со значительным с трудом привносит в его душу любовь, а я... пытался переместить его.

Мой голубчик, сказал граф, строгость его тона, если вы... ищем дуплеров, улучшаем твой стиль, ни я, ни мой друг. когда-либо жертвовать в нечистом храме твоего пола; если это деньги. умолять, искать людей, которые любят добрые дела. выполнить любое из этих описаний..... Но, негодяй, выкладывай.... Видишь ли, что произошло между месье и мной?"

Я увидел, как вы разговаривали друг с другом на улице, и ответил, Больше ничего, месье, уверяю вас.

Мне хотелось бы в это поверить, - сказал граф, - для вашего же блага. Хорошо, если бы я представлял, что вы видели что-нибудь еще, никогда бы не подумал. оживают там, где мы сейчас..... Жасмин, еще рано, у нас есть время. услышать приключения девушки, а потом посмотрим, что получится. покончить с ней. И цитата;

Молодежь садится, приказывает мне сесть рядом с ними. после чего я очень изобретательно познакомил их со всеми бедами, с которыми они столкнулись. которые поразили меня со дня моего рождения.

Ну, Жасмин, Жасмин, сказал месье де Брессак, как только я сказал. давайте на этот раз будем правы: справедливая Фемида обречена на то. это существо, давайте не будем страдать от замыслов Богини о том, чтобы помешать ей. так жестоко: давайте подвергнем преступницу смертной казни. произошло: это маленькое убийство, отнюдь не преступление. лишь в качестве репарации в моральной схеме; поскольку Иногда нам не повезло нарушить этот порядок. меньше всего мужественно исправлять ошибки, когда возникает такая возможность....".."

И жестокие люди, возложив на меня руки, затащили меня в сторону дерево, смеясь над моими слезами и криками.

Мы привяжем каждого из ее членов к дереву. Нам нужно четыре дерева. помещенный в прямоугольник, " сказал Брессак, срывая мою одежду.

Тогда с помощью их галстуков, носовых платков, платков... брекеты, они делают шнуры, с помощью которых я привязываюсь мгновенно. с их планом, то есть самым жестоким и болезненным. положение, которое только можно представить. Я не могу выразить вам того, что я страдал. казалось, что они раздвигают мне конечности от конечностей, и что мой живот, лицом к лицу. нисходящий и напряженный до предела, собирался расколоться в любой момент. мгновение; пот промокший лоб, я больше не существовал, кроме как через жестокость боли; если бы она прекратила сжимать мои нервы, смертного. страдание, несомненно, схватило бы меня: злодеев порадовала моя осанка, они считали меня и аплодировали.

"Ну, хватит, Брессак, наконец-то сказал. она может испугаться.

Тереза, Тереза, он продолжал развязывать мои руки и повелевал мне оденусь, покажу немного осуждения и пойду с нами, если вы... Присоединяйся ко мне, и у тебя никогда не будет причин сожалеть об этом. Мой тете нужна вторая горничная; я собираюсь представить тебя ей и..., на основании вашей истории, обязуйтесь заинтересовать ее своим интересом; я возьму на себя ответственность за ваше поведение, но если вы будете злоупотреблять моя доброта, если бы ты предал мою уверенность, или если бы не предал мою уверенность. подчинись моим намерениям, вот эти четыре дерева, Тереза, созерцайте участок земли, который они окружают: он может служить вам для того. могильник: имейте в виду, что это ужасное место - не более чем расстояние лиги от замка, к которому я собираюсь привести тебя. и что, по крайней мере, в случае провокации, я приведу тебя сюда по адресу один раз. "

Я сразу забыл о своих страданиях, я обнял графа на коленях, слезы стекают по щекам, я поклялся хорошо себя вести, но столь же нечувствителен к моей радости, как и к боли, ...

Позвольте нам не вмешиваться, - сказал Брессак, - и ваши действия будут говорить за вас, только они будут править твоей судьбой. Извини.

Мы продвигаемся вперед; Жасмин и его главный собеседник шептали замечания; я... смиренно следовать за ними, не сказав ни слова. Менее чем через час мы прибыть в замок мадам ла Маркиза де Брессак, чей замок.... великолепие и множество слуг, содержащихся в нем, заставляют меня видеть. что какой бы пост я ни занимал в этом доме, это, несомненно, будет более выгодным для меня, чем месье дю Харпин. I меня заставили ждать в офисе, где Жасмин очень любезно предлагает мне все, что способствует моему комфорту. Молодой граф ищет своего... тётя, познакомит её с тем, что он сделал, а через полчаса... сам пришел познакомить меня с маркизой.

Мадам де Брессак была 46-летней женщиной. красивой, и которая казалась очень респектабельной и благоразумной. в ее принципы и замечания жесткой экономии; в течение двух лет она была вдовой дяди молодого графа, который... женился на ней без всякого состояния, кроме прекрасного имени, которое он принёс. с ним. Все богатства месье де Брессака могли надеяться на то. зависело от этой тёти; что случилось с ним от его отца. едва давал ему средства, чтобы купить его удовольствия. доходы, которые мадам де Брессак получила, присоединившись к большому пособию. едва хватает; нет ничего дороже, чем удовольствия. граф был зависим; возможно, их покупают по более дешевой цене. но они умножаются гораздо быстрее, чем другие. Пятьдесят тысяч короны были доходом маркизы, а юный месье де Брессак - его единственный наследник. Все попытки склонить его к поиску профессии или профессии. оккупация потерпела неудачу; он не мог приспособиться к тому. отвлекал его внимание от свободы. Маркиза прошла мимо трех. месяцы из двенадцати месяцев года в стране; остальное время она жила в Париже, и эти три месяца, когда ей нужен был ее племянник. провести с ней время, были своего рода пыткой для человека, который ненавидел его. и считал, что потерял впустую каждый миг, проведенный за дверью. город, который был домом его удовольствий.

Молодой граф велел мне связаться с маркизой по поводу того. с которым я только что познакомила его, и как только я закончила:

Ваша искренность и наивность; мадам де Брессак сказала мне: "Не надо... позвольте мне подумать, что вы неправдивы. Я не буду спрашивать ни о чем другом. кроме того, что позволит мне поверить в то, что вы действительно дочь человека, о котором вы говорите; если это так, то я знал. отец, и это будет еще одна причина, чтобы проявить к тебе интерес. Что касается дела дю Харпина, я возьму на себя ответственность за то. уладив это с двумя визитами к канцлеру; он был моим... давным-давно друзья. Во всем мире нет человека величественнее. честность; мы должны доказать ему твою невиновность: все. обвинения, выдвинутые против вас, рухнут и будут сняты. Но подумай хорошенько, Тереза: то, что я обещаю тебе сейчас, не будет твоим. кроме как ценой безупречного поведения; таким образом, вы видите. эффект благодарности, который я прошу, всегда будет возвращаться к вашим прибыль. " Я бросилась к ногам маркизы, заверила ее, что она будет довольствуйся мной; с великой добротой она воспитывала меня и на меня. это место дало мне должность второй горничной на ее службе.

В конце трех дней мадам де Брессак получила информацию о том. который я искал в Париже; он соответствовал тому, что я хотел;... Маркиза похвалила меня за то, что я не навязал ей ничего мудрого. каждая мысль о несчастьях исчезала из моего разума, чтобы быть замененной. ничем иным, как надеждой на самое сладкое утешение. чего я и ожидал; но это не соответствовало замыслам Неба. бедная Тереза когда-либо должна быть счастлива, и если случайно окажется там. были рождены для неё несколько минут спокойствия, это было лишь для того, чтобы сделать так. более горькими из тех, кто терпит бедствие, чтобы преуспеть в этом.

/p>

Мы прибыли в Париж не раньше, чем мадам де Брессак. поспешил работать от моего имени: первый председательствующий судья пожелал. увидел меня, он с интересом услышал рассказ о моих несчастьях, дю. Клевета Харпина была признана, но напрасно. обязался наказать его, добившись большого успеха в борьбе с торговлей людьми. в поддельных банкнотах, в результате чего он разрушил три-четыре семьи, и откуда он собрал почти два миллиона, он только что переехал в Англия; что касается сжигания дворцовых тюрем, то это были убежден, что, хотя я извлек выгоду из этого события, я был не в том. и дело против меня было прекращено, так что.... судейские должности были согласованы, так что я был уверен. не было необходимости прибегать к дополнительным формальностям; я не задавала никаких вопросов, я был доволен тем, что узнал, что мне сказали, и вы скоро увидите. ошибался ли я.

Можете себе представить, что в результате того, что она сделала для того. мне очень понравилась мадам де Брессак, если бы она не показала. не предпринимала таких шагов, как те, которые она предприняла. навсегда обязал меня этой драгоценной защитнице? Однако, это было ни в коем случае не намерение молодого графа, чтобы я стал настолько близок привязанный к своей тете..... Но сейчас, кажется, подходящий момент для портрета. монстр.

У месье де Брессака было очарование молодости и больше всего обаяния. привлекательный лик; если бы в его фигуре были какие-то дефекты. или его черты лица, потому что они были слишком выражены. склонность к такому безразличию, мягкости, которая правильно принадлежит только женщинам; казалось, что одолжив ему атрибуты. женского пола, природа привнесла в него свои вкусы. ну.... Но какая же душа скрывалась за этими женоподобными милостями! Все пороки, которые характеризуют гения злодея, должны были быть такими. с которым он столкнулся: никогда не имел зла, злобы, мщения, жестокости, атеизм, разврат, неуважение ко всем обязанностям и, в первую очередь, к тем. из которых природа, как говорят, создаёт наши прелести, никогда не имела всего. эти качества были доведены до такой крайности. посреди всего его недостатки преобладали над другими: Месье де Брессак ненавидел его. тётя. Маркиза сделала все возможное, чтобы восстановить своего племянника. к путям добродетели; возможно, она вложила слишком много строгости в то. ее попытки; в результате, однако, граф. воспаленный этой самой строгостью, только тем более стремительно. отказался от своих пристрастий и бедняжка маркиза получила от ее преследований не осталось ничего, кроме его удвоенной ненависти.

Не представляйте себе, что граф часто говорил мне. по собственному желанию моя тетя действует во всем, что касается тебя, Тереза; поверь мне, если бы не мои постоянные издевательства, она бы быстро забудь, что она обещала сделать для тебя. Она бы заставила тебя почувствовать. в долгу перед ней, но все, что она сделала, это только благодаря мне; Да, Тереза, именно мне одному ты обязана, и.... спасибо, я надеюсь, от вас должно быть более бескорыстным, потому что... хотя у тебя красивое лицо, но это не так, и ты это прекрасно знаешь, после ваших услуг, к которым я стремлюсь; нет, Тереза, услуги, которые я жду от вас. ты радикально изменилась, и когда ты поправишься. убедившись в том, чего я добился от вашего имени. Спокойствие, надеюсь, я найду то, что имею право на то. ожидают от твоего духа."

Эти речи были настолько туманны, что я не знал, как на них ответить, ответила ему, как только смогла, и, возможно, с тем же успехом, что и я. отличный объект. Должен ли я в этом признаться? Увы! Да, чтобы скрыть мою недостатки были бы неправильным вашим доверием и плохим ответом. интерес к тому, что в тебе обострились мои несчастья. Тогда слушай, Мадам, из одной преднамеренной вины, в которой я должен упрекнуть. себя.... Что я говорю, вина? Это была глупость, глупость. экстравагантность.... никогда не было такого, чтобы она была такой же, но по крайней мере... это не преступление, это просто ошибка, ради которой я один совершил ошибку. были наказаны, и это, безусловно, не похоже на то. справедливая рука небес должна была использовать, чтобы погрузить меня в то. бездну, которая зевнула под меня вскоре после этого. Какой бы фол ни был. лечение, которому граф де Брессак подверг меня в первый день. Я с ним познакомилась, но все равно его было невозможно увидеть. часто не чувствуя, что меня тянет к нему непреодолимый. и инстинктивной нежности. Несмотря на все мои воспоминания о нем. жестокость, все мои мысли о его неприязни к женщинам, о том. испорченность его вкусов на берегу залива, который разделял нас... с моральной точки зрения, ничто в мире не смогло потушить этот нарождающийся и если бы граф призвал меня отдать свою жизнь. пожертвовал бы им ради него тысячу раз. Он был далеко от подозрений в моих чувствах... он был далеко, неблагодарный, от того, чтобы разделить причину слез, которые я проливаю каждый день, тем не менее, он не должен был сомневаться в моей страсти к тому. летать, чтобы выполнять все его приказы, угождать ему всеми возможными способами. не мог бы он не мельком увидеть, не имел ни малейшего представления о том. моё внимание; несомненно, потому, что они были инстинктивными, они были... также бездумным, и дошёл до того, что подал в суд за свои ошибки. служил им настолько, насколько это разрешено, и всегда прятал их. от его тети. Такое поведение в каком-то смысле завоевало у меня доверие, и все, что от него исходило, было так ценно для меня, что я была так ослеплена. тем маленьким, что его сердце предложило мне, что иногда у меня было... слабость верить, что он не безразличен ко мне. Но как быстро его чрезмерные расстройства разочаровали меня: они были настолько, что даже его здоровье было подорвано. Я несколько раз взял на себя смелость представлять он терпеливо выслушает меня, а в конце скажите мне, что человек не сломает себя от порока. он дорожил.

 

12.

 

"Ах, Тереза! Он воскликнул, что однажды, полон энтузиазма, если бы только ты... знал очарование этой фантазии, если бы только ты только мог понять. переживания от сладкой иллюзии быть не более чем женщиной! невероятная непоследовательность Я ненавижу этот секс, но все же хочется. подражать ему! Как это мило - преуспеть, Тереза, как восхитительно. это будет шлюхой для всех, кто будет иметь к тебе отношение. и проституции до их последнего периода, последовательно, в один и тот же день, чтобы быть хозяйкой носильщика, маркиз, камердинер, монах, чтобы быть возлюбленным каждого из них после того. другие, ласковые, завистливые, угрожающие, избитые, иногда победные. их руки, иногда жертвы, и у ног, расплавляя их с ласкает, оживляет их излишествами...... О, нет, Тереза, ты знаешь. не понимаю, что такое удовольствие для разума, построенного таким образом. моя.... Но, если ты можешь представить, что это божественно. физические ощущения фантазии, они не выдерживают, это... так оживлённо, что это так пикантно, что чувственно... заикается, перестает рассуждать, заикается, тысяча поцелуев. более нежные, чем следующие, не воспламеняют нас пылким рвением. приближаясь к пьянству, в которое агент погружает нас; увеличенный... в его объятиях, наш рот приклеился к нему, мы бы хотели, чтобы все наше существо... были включены в его жизнь; мы бы не сделали ни одного существа. с ним, если мы осмелимся пожаловаться, что нас пренебрегают. пусть он, более сильный, чем Геркулес, расширит нас, проникнет в нас; мы... у него была бы эта драгоценная сперма, застреленная в глубине нашей души. внутренности, потому что по своей жаре и силе, наши собственные прыгают вперед. в его руки..... Не думай, Тереза, что мы созданы как другие. у нас совершенно иная структура, и при создании мы, небеса, украсили алтари, которыми жертвовали наши селадоны... с той же самой чувствительной мембраной, что и твой висок. Венера, мы, в этом секторе, такие же женщины, как и вы в вашем... генераторное святилище; ни одно из ваших удовольствий нам неизвестно, нет такого, которым мы не знаем, как наслаждаться. в дополнение к ним наши собственные, и именно это восхитительное сочетание, которое делает нас из всех людей на земле наиболее чувствительными к удовольствиям. лучше всего созданное для того, чтобы испытать это; это очаровательное сочетание что делает наш вкус неисправимым, что превращает нас в энтузиасты и фринетики были одними из тех, кто имел глупость наказывать. нас... что заставляет нас поклоняться, до самой могилы, очаровательным... Бог, который восхищает нас. И цитирует.

Когда граф выразил себя, празднуя свои эксцентричности; когда я пытался поговорить с ним о Существе, перед которым он должен был... все, и от горя, вызванного этими беспорядками, его уважали... тётя, я ничего не почувствовала в нём, кроме селезёнки и плохого юмора. особенно нетерпеливо смотреть в такие руки и с таким нетерпением ждать... долго, богатства, которые, как он сказал бы, уже должны принадлежать ему. не видели ничего, кроме самой заядлой ненависти к этой нежной женщине, только самое решительное восстание против любого естественного. чувства. Тогда было бы правдой, если на вкус у человека есть были в состоянии так формально нарушить священный инстинкт закона. необходимым следствием этого первоначального преступления является страшная склонность совершить все остальные.

Иногда я использовал средства, предоставляемые религией, почти всегда. утешаясь этим, я попытался внедрить его сладости в это. душу порочного существа, более или менее уверенного в том, что он может быть сдержанный этими узами, если мне удастся добиться того, чтобы он ударил по соблазн, но граф не долго терпел моего использования такого. оружие. Объявленный враг наших святейших тайн, упрямый... критик чистоты наших догм, страстный антагонист. идею существования Высшего Существа, месье де Брессак, вместо того, чтобы позволяя мне обратить себя в веру, старался скорее работать над тем. коррупция.

Все религии начинаются с ложного предположения, Тереза, и он бы сказал. скажем: "Каждый предполагает при необходимости поклонение Творцу, но то. создателя никогда не существовало. В этой связи помните о себе. правильные заповеди некоего Кура-де-Фера, который, как вы мне сказали, работал над твоим разумом, как и я; ничего более справедливого, ни больше. точнее, чем принципы этого человека, и деградация, в которой мы находимся. иметь глупость удержать его, не лишает его права разумно хорошо.

"Если все произведения Природы являются результатом воздействия законы, по которым она находится в плену; если ее вечные действия и реакция Предположим, движение, необходимое для ее сущности, что станет с тем. суверенный хозяин дураков безвозмездно дарит ей? Это то, что вы делаете. проницательный инструктор сказал тебе, дорогая девочка. Что же тогда... религии, если не сдержанность, то тирания могущественных. пытался поработить более слабых? Руководствуясь этим замыслом, он осмелился сказать. к тому, кто утверждал, что имеет право господствовать, что Бог сотворил... утюги, с помощью которых жестокость его убила, и последний, озлобленный своими страданиями, неразборчиво верил во все то. бывшая мечта. Могут ли религии, рожденные от этих жуликов, заслужить уважение? Есть ли одна из них, Тереза, которая не несет в себе клеймо самозванца и глупости? Что мне в них всех опускать? Тайны, которые вызывают дрожь, догмы, которые вызывают возмущение... Природа, гротескные церемонии, которые просто вызывают насмешки. отвращение Но если среди них всех был один, который больше всего. особенно заслуживает нашего презрения и ненависти, о Тереза, не так ли? этот варварский закон христианства, в который мы оба входили. родился? Есть еще что-нибудь одиозное? То, что так возбуждает сердце и сердце. и не против восстания? Как так получилось, что рациональные мужчины все еще способны ...не доверяют туманному бормотанию, предполагаемым чудесам... противного создателя этого ужасного культа? Существовал ли когда-нибудь негодяй более достойный публичного негодования! Что он такое, кроме как проказой еврей, который родился от шлюхи и солдата в самом подлом мире. тушеное мясо, осмелился сбежать к пресс-секретарю того, кто, как они говорят, создал вселенную! С такими высокими претензиями, тебе придется признай, Тереза, по крайней мере, некоторые верительные грамоты необходимы. Но что это нелепый посол? Что он собирается сделать с тем. доказать свою миссию? Земное лицо будет изменено? чума, которая мешает ему быть уничтоженным? Солнце собирается сиять на него как ночью, так и днем? Тьмы не испортят его. больше? Мы наконец-то увидим, как воцарится счастье?.... Вовсе нет, это не так. это через фокус-покус, каперсы и каламбуры....

 

(Маркиз де Бьевр никогда не делал такой умный, как тот. Назарянин своему ученику: "Ты - Искусство Петра и на этой скале I. построит мою Церковь и Церковь; и они скажут нам, что остроумный язык - это одно из нововведений нашего века!

... что посланник Бога объявляет себя в мире; это в том. элегантное общество ручных работников, ремесленников и уличных торговцев, которое Небесный служитель приходит проявить свое величие, пьяным... ...с этими, с теми, с теми, с кем божий друг, Бог... сам приходит, чтобы подчинить ужесточившегося грешника своим законам; это он сам. ничего не изобретая для своих фарсов, но что может удовлетворить его. Льюднесс или его гурманство, которое этот хитрый парень демонстрирует. его миссия; как бы там ни было, он зарабатывает свое состояние. говяжьи спутники тяготеют к злодеям; секта - это секта. сформировались; догматы этой толпы сумели соблазнить некоторых евреев; рабов... римской власти, они с радостью принимают религию, которая, преодолевая наручников, заставляет их подвергаться только метафизической тирании. Их мотивы становятся очевидными, их индоминимум. разоблачает себя, мятежников арестовывают, их капитан... умирает, но смерть, несомненно, слишком милосердна для его вида. и из-за непростительного промаха в разведке. ученикам неуклюжего кабана позволено рассеиваться, вместо того, чтобы быть зарезали щеку к челюсти с их лидером. Фанатизм вызывает умы. в его руках, женщины вопят, дураки царапают и ругаются, имбецилы.... верьте, и вот! Самый презрительный из существ, самый злобный из всех. шарлатан, самый неуклюжий самозванец из всех, кто когда-либо входил, Вот он: смотрите! Боже, вот и маленький Божий мальчик, его папин ровесник; и теперь все его мечты посвящены мне, а теперь все его эпиграммы... становятся догмами! И все его ошибки таинственны! Его сказочный грудь отца открывается, чтобы принять его и этого Создателя, когда-то... время простое, внезапно становится сложным, втрое, для юмора его сыну, этот парень так достоин своего величия, но неужели святой Бог придерживается того. при этом? Нет, конечно, нет, его небесная мощь одарит многих. еще одно и большее одолжение. По зову священника.., Другими словами, странный парень, который врет, великий Бог, создатель... из всего, что мы видим, собирается унизить себя до такой степени. падая десять или двенадцать миллионов раз каждое утро в кусочек пшеничная паста; это верующие пожирают и ассимилируются, и Бог... Всемогущего тащат на дно их кишечника, где он сейчас... быстро превращается в гнусные экскременты, и все это для того. удовлетворение нежного сына, одиозного изобретателя этого чудовищного... безбожие, начало которому положил ужин в кабаре. Он заговорил, и... он был рукоположен. Он сказал: этот хлеб, который вы видите, будет моей плотью; вы... переварит его как таковое; теперь я Бог, а значит, Бог будет перевариваться. и, следовательно, Творец Неба и Земли изменится, потому что я говорил в самые гнусные вещи, которые только может сделать тело человека. выдохните, и человек съест своего Бога, потому что этот Бог хорош и... потому что он всемогущ. Тем не менее, эти болтовни усиливаются; их рост объясняется их аутентичностью, величием, величием, величием... возвышенность к ренессансу того, кто их представил, в то время, как в Правда, самая распространенная причина удвоить их существование, ибо заслуга в том. Ошибка становится не доказанной, кроме как присутствие мошенников. с одной стороны, идиотов - с другой. Эта печально известная религия наконец-то вступает на трон, и это слабый, жестокий, невежественный и невежественный человек. фанатичный император, обволакивающий его в королевскую мантию. четыре угла земли с ним. 0 Тереза, какой это вес. аргументы для расследования и философского мышления? Это мудрец, способный видеть что-либо в этой ужасающей куче басен, кроме того. отвратительный плод самозванства нескольких мужчин и недоверчивой доверчивости. огромного числа людей? Если бы Бог дал волю, чтобы у нас была какая-нибудь религия. другим, и был ли он действительно могущественным, или, если бы построил его более подходящим образом, если бы Бог действительно существовал, было бы это абсурдными способами. он бы передал нам свои инструкции? Разве это было бы голосом презрительного бандита, он бы показал. это было необходимо, чтобы служить ему? Был ли он верховен, был ли он могущественным, если бы он был просто, был ли он хорош, о Боге, о котором ты мне рассказываешь. через загадки и шутов, которых он хотел бы научить меня служить. и знать его? Владыка звездолетов и сердца людей, может. он не инструктирует нас, нанимая одного или убеждая могилой. себя в другом? Пусть однажды, когда-нибудь, на солнце. вторгаться в закон, писать огненными буквами, закон так, как он хочет. чтобы понять это, в той версии, которая ему нравится, то с одной стороны. Вселенной друг другу, все человечество прочитает его, увидит... сразу же, а затем будет виновен, если они не подчинятся. Но чтобы выразить свои желания только в каком-то незнакомом уголке Азии; чтобы выбрать для свидетелей самого хитрого и дальновидного из всех людей, для альтер-эго самый подлый ремесленник, самый абсурдный, он из тех. величайшей жестокости; чтобы сформулировать его учение так запутанно. невозможно разобраться с этим, ограничить знания о нем небольшой группой. отдельных лиц; оставить других по ошибке и наказать их за то. оставаясь там.... Нет, Тереза, нет, эти злодеяния не являются что мы хотим для нашего руководства; я предпочитаю умереть тысячу раз. смертей, а не верить им. Когда атеизм захочет пожелать мучеников, пусть это обозначит их; моя кровь готова пролиться. Давайте возненавидим эти ужасы, Тереза, пусть самые жестокие безобразия закреплют презрение, которое, к сожалению, является их заслугой..... Мои глаза были едва открыты, когда Я начала ненавидеть эти грубые мечтания; очень рано я сделала это законом. к себе, чтобы растоптать их в пыли, я поклялся вернуться в никогда больше; если ты будешь счастлив, подражай мне; как и я, ненавижу, отречься, осквернить этот ужасный объект этого ужасного культа; и этот культ... тоже, созданный для иллюзий, сделанный таким же, как он, чтобы его оскорбляли все. который притворяется мудрым."

 

13.

 

"О! Месье, я ответила, плакала, вы лишили бы кого-нибудь к несчастью ее самой искренней надежды, что ты засохнешь в ее сердце. религии, что является ее утешением. Крепко привязанный к его учения, абсолютно убеждены, что все удары, нанесенные против это всего лишь эффект свободы и страсти, так ли я должен жертвовать, хулить, богохульствовать, кошмарно относиться ко мне, сердце моё. самое сладкое пропитание;

Я добавил к этому тысячу других аргументов, они просто заставил графа смеяться, и его капризные принципы, подпитываемые более мужское красноречие, подкрепленное чтениями и исследованиями, которые я, к счастью, никогда не выступал, ежедневно нападал на мои собственные принципы, без того. трясу их. Мадам де Брессак, эта женщина полна благочестия и благочестия... добродетель, не знала, что ее племянник оправдывает свое дикое поведение тем. каждый парадокс дня; она слишком часто дрожит от того. слыша их; и поскольку она снисходительно отнеслась к тому. что для меня здравый смысл, чем для других женщин, она иногда брала с собой меня в сторону и говорить о ее разочаровании.

Тем временем, ее племянник, чемпион по куску, достиг точки. где он больше не пытался скрывать свои злобные намерения; не только если бы он окружил свою тетю всем этим опасным каналом. служил своим удовольствиям, но он даже носил смелость настолько. объявите ей в моем присутствии, что она должна была забрать это в себя. чтобы расстроить свой аппетит, он бы убедил ее в их обаянии. практикуя их на ее глазах.

Я дрожал; я с ужасом наблюдал за этим поведением. Я старался рационализировать мою реакцию, приписывая их происхождение себе лично. мотивы, потому что я хотел задушить несчастную страсть, которая сгорела. душа моя; но разве любовь - это болезнь, которую нужно лечить? Все, к чему я стремился. Против него просто раздуло пламя, и коварный граф... никогда не казался мне таким милым, как когда я собирался раньше. все, что должно было заставить меня ненавидеть его.

Я четыре года без устали оставался в этом доме. гонимый одними и теми же печалями, вечно утешаемый одними и теми же гонениями. сладости, когда этот мерзкий человек, в конце концов, поверил в себя. уверен в себе, осмелился раскрыть свои печально известные схемы. Мы были в в то время я один побывал на Маркизе, ее первой. ожидавшая его служанка получила разрешение остаться в Париже через летом, чтобы позаботиться о делах своего мужа. Однажды вечером вскоре после того, как я ушла на пенсию, и когда я подышала свежим воздухом. балкон моей комнаты, неспособность заставить себя лечь спать. из-за сильной жары, я вдруг услышал, как граф постучал. хотел поговорить со мной пару слов. Увы! Моменты, которые так жестоки. автор моих недугов, дарованных мне его присутствием, были слишком дороги для того. я осмеливаюсь отказать ему в этом; он входит, осторожно закрывает дверь и.... бросается в кресло.

Послушай меня, Тереза, и есть нота смущения в том. его голос, и я хочу сказать тебе кое-что очень важное; клянусь мне, что ты никогда не раскроешь ни одного из них.

Месье, я отвечаю, как вы думаете, способен ли я злоупотреблять вашими уверенность? Цитирую;

Вы понятия не имеете, чем бы вы рисковали, если бы хотели доказать. я совершил ошибку, доверившись тебе! Цитирую!

Самым страшным из всех моих бед должно быть потерять ваше доверие, Мне не нужны большие угрозы...."...и цитата; "...p

Тогда, Тереза, я приговорил свою тетю к смерти.... и это... это ваша рука, которую я должен использовать. Извините.

Моя рука! Я плакал, отчаянно от страха, и ты смогла это сделать, Месье, задумать такие проекты? Нет, избавиться от моей жизни, если... ты должен, но представь, что никогда не получишь от меня того ужаса. вы предлагаете."

"Послушай меня, Тереза, говорит граф, спокойно рассуждая со мной. действительно предвидел твое отвращение к этой идее, но, как ты понимаешь и понимаешь. я польстил себе верой в то, что смогу победить тебя. чувства... могут доказать вам, что это преступление, которое, как вам кажется. такой огромности, это, в конце концов, очень банальное дело.

Два злодеяния предстают перед тобой, Тереза. философский анализ: уничтожение существа, несущего в себе сходство с нами, и зло, с которым это разрушение - усиливается, когда это существо является одним из наших ближайших родственников. С по поводу преступления, связанного с уничтожением близкого человека, убедись, дорогой. Девочка, это чисто галлюцинаторно; мужчине не было предоставлено право способность уничтожать; в лучшем случае, он способен изменять формы, но... не хватает того, что необходимо для их уничтожения: ну, все формы равны. с точки зрения природы, ничего не теряется в огромном плавильном котле. где происходят вариации: все материальные массы, которые падают. в нее весной непрерывно перетекает в другие формы, и что бы там ни было. наше участие в этом процессе, а не в одном из них, нет необходимости говорить об этом, оскорбляет ее, никто не способен обидеть ее. Наши грабежи возродить ее силу; они стимулируют ее энергию, но ни один из них не ослабляет ее. ее; ее ничто не мешает и не мешает ей.... Почему! Что? имеет ли это значение для ее творческой руки, если эта масса плоти сегодня ношение конформации двустворчатой особи воспроизводится. завтра под видом горстки сороконожек? Смею сказать, что постройка этого двуногого животного стоит ей не больше. земляного червя, и что она должна проявлять больший интерес к тому. тот самый, чем в другом? Если тогда степень привязанности, или.... а не безразличия, то же самое, что может быть с ней, если.... меч одного человека, другой человек превращается в муху или лезвие... травы? Когда они убедили бы меня в возвышенности нашего когда они докажут мне, что это действительно так. важно для природы, что ее законы обязательно нарушаются этим. трансмутации, то я смогу поверить, что убийство - это но когда самое продуманное и трезвое исследование доказало мне. что все, что произрастает на этом земном шаре, имеет одинаковую ценность в том. ее глаза, я никогда не уступлю, что изменение одного из них... существа в тысячу других могут в любом смысле расстроить ее. намерения или плохо себя чувствует по отношению к своим желаниям. Я говорю себе: все мужчины, все животные, все растения выращиваются, кормятся, уничтожают и воспроизводят. себя теми же способами, никогда не подвергаясь настоящей смерти, но... простая вариация того, что их модифицирует; все, что я говорю, появляется сегодня. в одной форме и через несколько лет или часов в другой, все они могут... волеизъявление того, кто хочет их перевезти, изменить тысячу. тысячи раз за один день, без одной из директив Природы. ... что мне сказать? Без этого... трансмутатор сделал что угодно, кроме хорошего, так как демонтировав индивидуумов, чьи основные компоненты вновь становятся необходимыми для природы, он ничего не делает по этому делу, неправомерно квалифицируется как преступник, но... сделать ее творческую энергию, которую она обязательно лишится. тем, кто, проявляя жестокое безразличие, не осмеливается предпринимать никаких действий. перетасовывая, так сказать, палубу..... О, Тереза, это человеческая гордость. в одиночку квалифицирует убийство как преступление. Это тщеславное создание, воображающее. себя самым возвышенным из обитателей земного шара, самым величественным из всех. существенно, отходит от этого ложного принципа для того, чтобы утверждать, что поступок, приведший к его гибели, может быть ничем иным, как позор; но его тщеславие, его безумие изменяют законы природы, а не законы природы. одна йота; не существует человека, который в глубине души не мог бы чувствовать самое страстное желание избавиться от тех, кем он является. затрудненный, беспокойный или чья смерть может принести ему некоторую пользу; и ты полагаешь, Тереза, что разница между этим желанием... и его эффект очень велик? Теперь, если эти впечатления приходят к нам. от природы, можно ли предположить, что они ее раздражают? Будет ли она вдохновлять в нас, что могло привести к ее падению? Успокойся, дорогая девочка, мы не будем нервничать. не испытать ничего, что не служило бы ей; все ее импульсы. в нас входят агенты ее указов; человеческие страсти, кроме того. означает, что она работает для достижения своих целей. Если ей нужно больше. индивиды, она вызывает в нас похоть, и вот! творения; когда разрушения становятся ей необходимы, она вставляет месть, жадность, жадность, разврат, амбиции в наших сердцах и любовь! были убийства, но она не прекращала работать от своего имени, и... что бы мы ни делали, не может быть и речи об этом, мы - бездумные орудия ее капризов.

"Нет, Тереза, нет! Природа не оставляет нам в руках возможность совершения преступлений, которые противоречили бы ей. Экономика; известно ли когда-либо, что самые слабые имели возможность чтобы обидеть сильнейших? Кем мы по сравнению с ней? Может ли она, когда она создала нас, поместили в нас то, что было бы способно причинить ей боль? Может ли это идиотское предположение сочетаться с возвышенным... и каким образом мы видим, как она достигает своих целей? Ах! Это были убийства. ни одно из человеческих действий, которое наилучшим образом соответствовало ее намерениям, позволит ли она совершить убийство? Может, подражать, а может быть... травмировать ее? Может ли она злиться, видя, как человек поступает со своими братьями так. что она сама делает с ним каждый день? Так как доказано, что она не может воспроизводиться без разрушений, так это не действовать в гармонии. с ее желанием постоянно их размножать? Человек, который переезжает к нам. в этом направлении, который погружается вперед со всем возможным усердием. бесспорно, это тот, кто служит ей лучше всего, потому что это будет он. который больше всего сотрудничает с теми схемами, которые она постоянно демонстрирует. The The The главное и самое красивое из качеств природы - это движение. постоянно агитирует ее, но это движение просто бесконечно. в результате совершения преступлений, она хранит ее только посредством совершения преступлений. человек, который больше всего похож на нее, и поэтому самый совершенный. быть, обязательно будет тем, чья самая активная агитация будет становятся причиной многих преступлений, в то время как, повторяю, бездействие или ленивый человек, то есть, добродетель, должен быть в ней. глаза - как можно сомневаться в этом? Ä Наименьшее совершенство с тех пор. он склонен только к апатии, к вялости, к тому бездействию, которое может привести к тому. немедленно ввергнуть все обратно в хаос, если бы его звезда оказалась в хаосе. восходящего. Равновесие должно быть сохранено; оно может быть сохранено только в том случае. сохраняемые преступлениями; следовательно, преступления служат природе; если они служат она, если она требует их, если она хочет их, если она хочет, могут ли они обидеть ее? А кто еще может обидеться, если не она?

Но моя тетя - существо, которое я собираюсь уничтожить..... О, Тереза, по мнению философа, насколько это легкомысленно. кровосмесительные узы! Простите меня, но я даже не хочу обсуждать... они так бесполезны. Эти презрительные цепи, плоды нашего законы и наши политические институты могут что угодно значить для того. Природа?

Оставь свои предрассудки, Тереза, оставь их позади и послужи им. Я; твое состояние нажито. И цитата;

О, месье! Я ответила, испуганная графом де Брессаком, Ваш разум изобретает эту теорию о безразличной, безразличной природе; действуй скорее, прислушивайся к своему сердцу, и ты услышишь, как он осудит всех. лживые рассуждения о свободе. Разве это не сердце, перед судом которого Я рекомендую вам, святилище, где эта природа, которую вы возмущаетесь. быть услышанным и уважаемым? Если она выгравирует на нем крайность. ужас преступления, над которым вы медитируете, вы позволите мне, что это чертовски ужасно. Один? Страсти, я знаю, ослепляют тебя в данный момент, но... как только они умрут, как ты не будешь мучиться раскаянием? Чем больше ваша чувствительность, тем сильнее она будет вас жалить..... Ох Месье! Сохраните, уважайте эту нежную, бесценную жизнь друга; не жертвуй этим; ты погибнешь от от отчаяния! Каждый день... каждый день... как только тебя посетит образ этой заветной тети, та, которую бы бросила в свою гробницу твоя бездумная ярость; ты... слышала бы ее откровенный голос, произносящий эти сладкие имена. которые были радостью вашего детства; она присутствовала бы во время вашего детства. просыпается часами и, кажется, пытает тебя во сне. открывая своими окровавленными пальцами раны, которыми вы бы могли изуродовали ее; после этого ни один счастливый момент не засиял бы. когда ты живешь на этой земле, ты станешь чужим для того. удовольствия; каждая твоя идея была бы неприятностью; небесная рука, которого вы не цените, отомстит за те дни, когда вы отомстите. уничтожили, изобретая свою собственную, и не попробовав на вкус счастье от ваших преступлений, вы были бы убиты смертельной скорбью. за то, что осмелился их совершить."

Когда я произнес эти слова, слезы вернулись ко мне в глаза, я опустился к моим глазам... на колени перед графом; все, что свято, я умолял его. оставить в забвении печально известное забвение, о котором я поклялся ему всем. мою жизнь я бы спрятал..... Но я не знал человека, с которым я встречался занимался торговлей; я не знал, до какой степени страсти привели к преступлениям. в этой порочной душе. Граф встал и заговорил ледяным голосом.

Я прекрасно вижу, что ошибался, Тереза, - сказал он. - Я сожалею об этом, возможно, как за ваш счет, так и за мой счет; неважно, я сделаю так. найди другие средства, и ты потеряешь очень многое. без того, чтобы твоя любовница ничего не получила. Извини.

Угроза изменила все мои представления, отказавшись принять преступника. предложенную мне роль, я подвергал себя большому личному риску. и моя защитница безошибочно погибла, согласившись быть его. сообщник, я бы защищался от гнева графа и защищался от него. уверенно спасти его тетю; мгновенное отражение убедило меня. должны согласиться на все. Но разворот был бы настолько быстрым. показалось подозрительным, я пытался отложить капитуляцию; я был обязан граф часто повторял свои софиты, понемногу. в эфире, когда не знаешь, что ответить: Брессак поверил мне. Я оправдал свою слабость силой Его искусства и в том. в конце концов, я сдался. Граф вскочил в мои объятия. Ах, как я должен был быть счастлив, если бы его движение было вдохновлено другим. мотив.... Что я говорю? Время прошло: его ужасное. его варварский замысел уничтожил все мои чувства. слабое сердце осмелилось забеременеть, и я видел в нём ничего, кроме чудовище....

 

14.

 

"Ты первая женщина, которую я когда-либо держал на руках, - сказала Цитируй. Граф, и, честно говоря, это от всей души..... Ты восхитительна, моя Ребенок, кажется, блеск мудрости проник в твой разум! Что этот очаровательный ум так долго пролежал во тьме! Невероятно. " <Затем мы пришли к фактам. Через два-три дня, как только это случится, как представившуюся возможность, я должен был сбросить дозу яда. Брессак дал мне посылку, которая содержала его в стаканчике. шоколад, который мадам обычно принимала утром. Граф заверил мой иммунитет от всех последствий, и непосредственно я совершил передал мне контракт с аннуитетом в размере двух лет. тысячи крон; он подписал эти обещания, не охарактеризовав их как в котором я должен был наслаждаться их благами; мы разошлись.

<В разгар всего этого произошло нечто особенное, что-то слишком способное раскрыть чудовищную душу монстра. с которым мне пришлось иметь дело; я не должна ни на секунду прерывать себя. ибо, несомненно, вы ждете развязки приключений в этом приключении в которую я ввязался.

<Через два дня после заключения нашего уголовного пакта, граф... узнал, что дядя, по наследству которого он не имел ни малейшего отношения. считая, только что оставил ему доход в 80 тысяч фунтов стерлингов.... О, Боже! Я сказал себе, услышав новость, это ли тогда.... таким образом, небесное правосудие наказывает самый низкий заговор! " И прямолинейно раскаиваясь в этом богохульстве, сказанном против Провидения, я... встать на колени и просить прощения у Всемогущего, и радостно предположить, что это неожиданное развитие событий должно было произойти меньше всего изменить планы графа..... Что было моей ошибкой!

<Ах, моя дорогая Тереза, он сказал в тот же вечер. моя комната, как процветание обрушивается на меня! Часто я говорил. вы так думаете: идея преступления или казни - самое надежное средство для того. привлекают удачу; кроме злодеев не существует, кроме как для злодеев. <Что? Я ответила, и это невостребованное вознаграждение не убедило меня. Вы, месье, терпеливо ждете смерти, которую хотели поспешить;

<Подождите, граф резко ответил: "Я не собираюсь ждать двух". минуты, Тереза, ты не знаешь, что мне двадцать восемь? Ну, это так. тяжело ждать в моем возрасте..... Нет, пусть это скажется на нашей схеме, а не на нашей... хоть немного, дайте мне успокоиться, увидев, как все это приводит к тому. закончится до того, как мы вернемся в Париж..... Завтра, в самое последнее на следующий день послезавтра, умоляю вас. У нас достаточно поздно: приближается час оплаты первого взноса. четверть вашего аннуитета... за совершение действия, гарантирующего... деньги.... и цитата;

Лучше всего, что есть, что есть, я замаскировал страх перед отчаянным страстью. вдохновил меня, и я возобновил свое участие в конкурсе позавчера. убедил, бросил, бросил я неважно нел то ужасное вздутие, бородатол... помолвлен, граффит скоро скоростной, я разыгрываю трюк. и что я предупреждаю мадам де Брессак, что ты не можешь себе представить. итак, на обнародование проекта, молодой граф, наблюдая, как так так так и так так далее или иначе иначе иначе иначе обманывает себя, быстро прибегая к прибегает. К сожалению, это не так, фирменное стиле мести со стороны фирмы "Солидарность". Осталил альтернатива сіп "а сірі "а, но ничего віт "е. Продвижение вперед и назад; я решил предупредить. Маркиза, из всех возможных мер мер, увидимся позже. избрали избранных.

<Мадам, я сказал ей утром во время последнего интервью. Граф, мадам, у меня есть кое-что очень важное для того. раскрыть, но какой бы жизненно важный для тебя интерес, я не буду затрагивать его. если только заранее вы не дадите мне слово чести не нести никакой ответственности. обиду на вашего племянника за то, что у месье было храбрость на концерт..... Вы будете действовать, мадам, вы возьмете на себя ответственность шаги осторожности, но ты не скажешь ни слова. Смириться дать мне твое обещание, иначе я молчу. И цитирую. <Мадам де Брессак, которая думала, что это всего лишь вопрос о том. повседневные экстравагантности ее племянника, связанная клятвой, которую я даю. потребовал, и я все рассказал. Несчастная женщина ворвалась в дом слезы, узнав о позоре.... Чудовище! Она плакала, Я когда-нибудь делал что-нибудь не для его пользы? Если бы я хотел чтобы помешать его порокам или исправить их, какой еще мотив, кроме его собственного. счастье могло бы сдержать меня до предела! И разве это не благодаря мне он унаследовал это наследие, которое только что оставил ему дядя? А, Тереза, Тереза, докажите мне, что это правда, этот проект... помешать мне усомниться; мне нужно все это. может помочь погасить чувства, которые мое бездумное сердце осмелилось бы погасить. и в то же время сохранить для монстра.... " А потом я принесла пакет с яд в поле зрения; было трудно представить лучшие доказательства; но.... Маркиза хотела поэкспериментировать с ним; мы заставили собаку проглотить свет. Дозировка, заткни животное, и в конце двух часов он был мертв. после того, как его схватили ужасные конвульсии. Любые сомнения по поводу того. теперь рассеяна, мадам де Брессак приняла решение, она повелела мне дайте ей остаток яда и немедленно отправьте курьера с курьером. письмо герцогу де Сонзевальскому, связанное с ней, в котором он просит его пойти прямо, но тайно, перед госсекретарем и разоблачить. злодеяние племянника, жертвой которого она может стать в любой момент. стать; снабдить себя салатом кэша; заставить всех возможно поспешить приехать и избавить ее от негодяев, у которых было так много времени. жестоко замышлял забрать ее жизнь.

<Но это отвратительное преступление должно было быть совершено. немыслимое разрешение должно было быть дано Небесами. добродетель может быть получена, чтобы поддаться угнетениям злодея: животное. на котором мы экспериментировали, открыл графу все: он.... услышал завывание; зная, что его тетя любит зверя, он... спрашивает, что с ним было сделано; те, с кем он говорил, ничего не знают. и не дал ему ясного ответа; с этого момента. начали складываться подозрения, он не произнес ни слова, но я увидел. что он был взволнован; я упомянул его состояние маркизе, она сказала. еще больше расстроилась, но не могла придумать ничего, что можно было бы поделать, кроме желания. курьера, чтобы сделать еще большую спешку, и, если возможно, еще больше. осторожно, чтобы скрыть цель своей миссии. Она посоветовала племяннику. что она пишет в Париж, умоляя герцога де Сонцеваля потратить впустую ни секунды, чтобы заняться делом недавно умершего дяди. потому что если никто не претендует на наследство. бояться судебного разбирательства; она добавила, что попросила герцога. чтобы прийти и дать ей полный отчет об интрижке. она может узнать, будут ли она и ее племянник обязаны чтобы отправиться в путешествие в Париж. Слишком искусный физиономик, чтобы не упустить возможность заметить смущение в лице его тети, не заметить, как... Ну, некоторая путаница, написанная на моей, граф улыбнулся. и не менее был начеку. Под предлогом того, что мы берем набережная, он покидает замок, ложится в ожидании курьера. в месте, где человек неизбежно должен пройти мимо. Посланник, намного больше. создатель графа, чем доверенный миньон его тети. возражает, когда его хозяин требует, чтобы он увидел свои отправления. с собой, и Брессак, будучи убежденным в том, что, несомненно, он называет меня... предательство, дает курьеру сотню луи, вместе с которым инструкции больше никогда не появляться у маркизы. Он возвращается замок, ярость в сердце его, но он сдерживает себя; он... встречается со мной, как обычно, уговаривает меня, спрашивает, не будет ли это не так. завтрашний день, указывает на то, что важно, чтобы дело было совершено до того. прибытие герцога, а затем ложится спать с спокойным воздухом, вокруг которого ничего не стоит замечать. В то время, когда я ничего не знал, я был тем. все продумать. Было ли ужасное преступление, которое должно было быть совершено... действия графа сообщили мне позже, что ему, конечно же, придётся совершить его сам; но я не знал, как; я много догадывался. было бы неплохо рассказать тебе, что я вообразил? Скорее, давайте переедем. до жестокости, с которой меня наказали за то, что у меня не было захотел сделать это. На следующий день после того, как посыльный был перехватили, мадам выпила свой шоколад, как всегда, одетая, выглядел взволнованным и сел за стол; вряд ли я был вне игры. столовая, когда граф приставал ко мне.

<Тереза, и нет ничего более флегматичного, чем его... так, как он говорил, я нашел более надежный метод, нежели которую я предложил для достижения наших целей, но многие детали таковы. и я не осмеливаюсь приходить в вашу комнату так часто. в пять часов на углу парка, я присоединюсь к тебе, мы будем прогуляемся вместе в лесу, пока на нашей набережной я буду объяснить все это. "

<Я хотел бы подтвердить, мадам, что, независимо от того, было ли это влияние Провидения, будь то по причине чрезмерной откровенности, или по причине того. слепота, ничто не давало мне намеков на ужасные страдания, которые ждут меня. я; я верил, что я в свою безопасность, благодаря секрету маркизы. что я ни на секунду не представлял себе, что граф имел в своем распоряжении смог их обнаружить, но, тем не менее, я не был полностью уверен в себе.

&cot;Le parjure est vertu quand on promit le crime,&cot; один из наших трагические поэты говорили, но лжесвидетельство всегда одиозно по отношению к деликатному... и чувствительный дух, который вынужден прибегнуть к ней. Моя роль поставила меня в неловкое положение.

Как бы то ни было, я пришёл на встречу; граф не был поздно приехав туда; он подошел ко мне очень легко и легко, и мы отправился в лес; в то время как он смеялся и смеялся. шутил, как это было в его привычке, когда мы были вместе. Когда я пытался вести разговор на тему, о которой он мечтал. обсудить, он сказал мне подождать немного, сказал, что боится, что мы можем Если быть точным, ему не показалось, что мы находимся в достаточно безопасном месте; очень постепенно, без моего ведома, мы приблизились к этим четырем деревья, к которым я был так жестоко привязан давным-давно. Увидев дрожь прошла сквозь меня: весь ужас моей судьбы поднялся вверх. перед моими глазами, и подумать только, не удвоился ли мой ужас. увидел приготовления, которые были сделаны в этом деле. ужасное место. Веревки висели на одном из деревьев; огромные мастифы были... сдавались друг другу в аренду и, похоже, ждали. только я, чтобы утолить голод, о котором было объявлено. их зияющие, покрытые пеной челюсти, одна из любимых графов охранялась. их.

<После чего вероломное существо перестало нанимать всех, кроме тех. очень грязные эпитеты.

Она посоветовала племяннику. что она пишет в Париж, умоляя герцога де Сонцеваля потратить впустую ни секунды, чтобы заняться делом недавно умершего дяди. потому что если никто не претендует на наследство. бояться судебного разбирательства; она добавила, что попросила герцога. чтобы прийти и дать ей полный отчет об интрижке. она может узнать, будут ли она и ее племянник обязаны чтобы отправиться в путешествие в Париж. Слишком искусный физиономик, чтобы не упустить возможность заметить смущение в лице его тети, не заметить, как... Ну, некоторая путаница, написанная на моей, граф улыбнулся. и не менее был начеку. Под предлогом того, что мы берем набережная, он покидает замок, ложится в ожидании курьера. в месте, где человек неизбежно должен пройти мимо. Посланник, намного больше. создатель графа, чем доверенный миньон его тети. возражает, когда его хозяин требует, чтобы он увидел свои отправления. [...] [...]

"Что твоя двойственность сделала для тебя, недостойное создание? Ты рисковали своей жизнью, не спасая мою тетю: смерть - бросить, по возвращении в замок, я найду состояние, ожидающее. Я, но ты должен умереть; прежде чем ты умрешь, ты должен понять, что... добродетельный путь не всегда самый безопасный. обстоятельства в этом мире, когда соучастие в преступлении предпочтительнее. к сообщению. " И не давая мне времени на ответ, не давая мне ответить. доказательство наименьшего сочувствия к ужасной ситуации, в которой я оказался, он... притащил меня к дереву, предназначенному для меня, и с помощью которого его камердинер стояла ожидаемо. Вот она, - сказал он, - существо, которое хотело. чтобы отравить мою тетю, и которая, возможно, уже совершила ужасное преступление. преступления, несмотря на мои усилия по его предотвращению; без сомнения, это было бы было бы лучше отдать ее в руки правосудия, но закон лишил бы ее жизни, и я предпочитаю оставить это ей. приказать, чтобы она страдала дольше. <Двое злодеев в одно мгновение схватили меня за руку. Я голый. Красивые ягодицы, сказал граф в самом жестоком тоне. ирония, жестокое обращение с этими предметами, превосходная плоть... отлично. Обед для собак." Когда на мне не осталось вещей одежды. привязывается к дереву веревкой, прикрепленной к талии, так что я могу защитить себя, как только смогу, мои руки остались свободными. чтобы я мог продвинуться или отступить примерно на два ярдов. The The The приготовления завершены, граф, очень сильно продвинулся, сделал шаг вперед. смотрит на мое выражение лица, он оборачивается и проходит мимо меня; его дикарь как обращаться со мной, похоже, говорит, что его пальцы-убийцы ...как оспаривать ярость стальных зубов его мастифа....

&p>&cot;идем, говорим он своему лейтенанту, освобождаем животных, время. прибыл. "

<Они свободны, граф их возбуждает, все трое бросают. себя на моем бедном теле, можно было бы подумать, что они делятся этим. настолько мудрым, что ни одна из его частей не была бы свободна от нападения; напрасно я отвожу их обратно, они кусаются и рвут меня с новой яростью, и на протяжении всей этой ужасной сцены, Брессак, трусливый Брессак... если бы мои мучения разожгли его предательскую похоть... зверь... сдается, хотя и уважает меня, преступнику своего товарища. ласки

<Хватит, хватит, он сказал, что через несколько минут пройдет. давай. Свяжите собак и забросим это существо к её сладкой... судьба.

<Ну да, Тереза, он говорит, что разрывает мои узы, и добродетель в том. не практиковать за счет каких-то расходов; пенсия в размере двух тысяч человек короны, это стоило бы не больше, чем укусы, которые ты кусаешь. покрытый цитатами;

Но в моем состоянии я едва слышу его; я опускаюсь до подножия ноги. дерево и вот-вот потеряет сознание.

<Это очень щедро с моей стороны - спасти твою жизнь, Цитата. предателя, которого мои страдания обостряют, по крайней мере, позаботьтесь о том, чтобы вы... воспользуйтесь этой услугой.... &cquot;

Тогда он приказывает мне встать, одеться и уйти отсюда немедленно. По мере того, как моя кровь течет повсюду, чтобы моя маленькая одежда... только одежду, которая у меня есть, не запятнанана, я собираю траву, чтобы вытереть. Я сам; Брессак шагает туда-сюда, куда больше занят своими делами. мысли, чем заботиться обо мне.

<Моя опухшая плоть, кровь, которая продолжает течь из моей... множественные раны, ужасная боль, которую я терплю, все заставляет операция по хорошей одежде почти невозможна; никогда ни один из них нечестный человек, который только что вверг меня в это ужасное состояние... он... он... за которую я бы однажды пожертвовал жизнью, ни разу не пожертвовал бы им. проявить хоть малейший намек на сочувствие. Когда я долгое время готово:

"Иди куда хочешь, Цитируй, говорит он, у тебя должно быть осталось немного денег, Я не отниму у тебя этого, но остерегайся появиться в любой из них. мои дома в городе или деревне: есть два отличных места. Причины, по которым вы этого не делаете: вы можете знать, прежде всего, с таким же успехом, что роман, который, как ты думала, закончился, еще не закончился. Они сообщил вам, что с вами закон закон закончен; они сказали вам. Неправда; ордер на твой арест все еще в силе, дело по-прежнему теплое: вас оставили в такой ситуации, чтобы ваше поведение могло быть таким... наблюдаются. Во-вторых, ты собираешься пройти, поскольку... общественность обеспокоена убийцей маркизы, если она еще не убила его. дышит, я собираюсь проследить, чтобы она перенесла эту мысль в все домашнее хозяйство разделит его, и там у вас двое. вместо одного испытания: вместо мерзкого ростовщика, ты иметь для противника богатого и могущественного человека, который настроен на то. загнать тебя в ад, если ты злоупотребляешь жизнью его состраданиями. оставляет тебе."

 

15.

 

"О, месье! Каков был мой ответ, каковы бы ни были ваши суровости? со мной, не боясь, что я отомщу, я думал, что обязан предпринять шаги против тебя, когда это был вопрос жизни твоей тети; но если в этом замешана только несчастная Тереза, я никогда не сделаю того. что угодно. Прощайте, месье, пусть ваши преступления сделают вас такими же счастливыми, как и то. твоя жестокость заставила меня страдать, и неважно, что случилось. зарезервированное за мной Небесами, в то время как это продлит мою жалкую жизнь, Я буду использовать свои дни только для того, чтобы молиться за тебя.

Граф поднял голову; он не мог не взглянуть на меня. услышав эти слова, и когда он увидел меня дрожащим и покрытым слезы и, несомненно, боялся, чтобы его не тронуло то, что он увидел... жестокий ушел, и я больше никогда его не видела.

Искренне преданный своей агонии, я отступил назад и лежал. дерево; там, давая свободу моей ране, я сделал лес. звучит с моими стонами; я прижал свою ударенную раму к и пролил на душу все мои слезы.

<Боже мой, я закричал: "Ты так захотел, что это было зернистым". в Твоих вечных указах, что невиновные должны были попасть под власть... виновен и должен был стать их добычей: избавься от меня, Господи, я еще не умер. подальше от того, что Ты страдал за нас; пусть те, кого я терплю. Я обожаю Тебя, когда-нибудь сделай меня достойным награды, которую Ты сохранишь. для смиреннейших, когда в скорбях пред Ним предстанет Ты. да пребудут его страдания до величайшего прославления Твоего.

Ночь была закрыта: я почти не мог двигаться; я был почти вне моих сил. едва способен стоять прямо; Я бросил взгляд на чащу, где четыре года назад я спал ночь, когда я был в обстоятельства почти такие же несчастные! Я тащил себя, как мог мог и, дойдя до того же места, измученный моим кровоточащие раны, переполненные тревогами моего ума и скорбями от всего сердца я прошел самую жестокую ночь, какую только можно вообразить.

К рассвету, благодаря моей молодости и энергичному характеру, некоторые из моя сила была восстановлена; очень напуган близостью этого несчастный замок, я начал от него без промедления; Я оставил леса, и решил любой ценой получить первое жилье, которое может попасться на глаза, я вошел в город Сен-Марсель, около пяти лиги, удаленные от Парижа; Я потребовал адрес хирурга, один был дан мне; Я представился и умолял его одеть раны; Я сказал ему, что в связи с каким-то делом, на котором источник любви, я покинул дом моей матери, покинул Париж и в течение ночи были настигнуты в лесу бандитами, которые в месть за мое сопротивление их желаниям, меня. Роден, как называли этого художника, осмотрел меня с величайшим внимание, не нашел ничего опасного в моих травмах; если бы я пришел в ему напрямую, по его словам, он мог бы гарантировать, что в через две недели он будет таким же свежим и цельным, как и я был до моего приключения; однако ночь прошла под открытым небом и мое беспокойство заразило мои раны, и я не мог ожидать, чтобы быть ну меньше чем за месяц. Родин нашел место в своем собственном доме, чтобы подайте меня, позаботились обо мне, и на тридцатый день на моем теле больше не было ни одного остатка месье де Жестокости Брессака.

Как только я смог подышать воздухом, моей первой заботой было найти в городе какую-нибудь девушку, достаточно ловкую и умную, чтобы иди в замок маркизы и узнай, что там произошло с момента моего отъезда. Это видимо очень опасная любознательность без малейшего сомнения был бы чрезвычайно неуместен; но здесь речь шла не о простом любопытстве. Что я заработал пока Маркиза осталась в моей комнате; Мне едва исполнилось шесть Луи обо мне, и у меня было более сорока в замке. я сделал не думайте, что граф будет настолько недобрым, чтобы отказать мне в том, что было так законно мое. Убедил, что его первая ярость однажды прошла, он не хотел бы сделать мне такую ​​несправедливость, я написал письмо рассчитано прикоснуться к нему как можно глубже. Я был осторожен с скрыть мой адрес, и я умолял его вернуть мою старую одежду вместе с небольшой суммой, которая будет найдена в моей комнате. живая и энергичная крестьянка двадцати пяти лет взяла на себя обязательство доставить мое письмо и обещал сделать все возможное, чтобы вернуть меня все информацию, которую она могла бы собрать по различным предметам, о которых я дал ей понять, что мне нужно быть просветленным. Я настоял, чтобы превыше всего она скрывает название места, где я был, что она не произноси ни слова обо мне в какой бы то ни было форме или связи, и что она говорит, что взяла письмо от человека, который принес его от где-то в пятнадцати лигах отсюда. Жанетта ушла, и двадцать четыре несколько часов спустя она вернулась с ответом; это все еще существует, у меня есть это здесь, мадам, но, прежде чем читать, соизволил узнать, что было выяснилось в замке графа, так как я был вне его.

После того, как я ушел, тяжело заболел, маркиза де Брессак был схвачен ужасными болями и конвульсиями и имел умер на следующее утро; семья бросилась в замок и племянник, казалось, охваченный величайшим запустением, объявил что его тетя была отравлена ​​горничной, которая взяла Вылет в тот же день. Запросы были сделаны, и у них было намерение чтобы убить негодяя, если бы ее нашли; что касается остальных, граф обнаружил, что наследство сделало его очень богаче, чем он когда-либо ожидал, он будет; маркиза денежный ящик, карманная книжка и драгоценные камни, все они предметы, которых никто не знал что-нибудь, поставил племянника, кроме его доходов, в possession of more than six hundred thousand francs in chattels or cash. Behind his affected grief, the young man had, it was said, considerable trouble concealing his delight, and the relatives, convoked for the autopsy demanded by the Count, after having lamented the unhappy Marquise's fate and sworn to avenge her should the culprit fall into their hands, had left the young man in undisputed and peaceful possession of his villainy. Monsieur de Bressac himself had spoken to Jeannette, he had asked a number of questions to which the girl had replied with such frankness and decision that he had resolved to give her his response without pressing her further. There is the fatal letter, said Therese, handing it to Madame de Lorsange, yes, there it is, Madame, sometimes my heart has need of it and I will keep it until I die; read it, read it without shuddering, if you can.

Madame de Lorsange, having taken the note from our lovely adventuress' hands, read therein the following words:

 

The criminal capable of having poisoned my aunt is brazen indeed to dare thus write to me after her execrable deed; better still is the care with which she conceals her retreat; for she may be sure she will be discomfited if she is discovered. But what is it she has the temerity to demand? What are these references to money? Does what she left behind equal the thefts she committed, either during her sojourn in the house or while consummating her final crime? Let her avoid sending a second request similar to this, for she is advised her ambassador will be arrested and held until the law acquaints itself with the place where the guilty party is taking cover.

Madame de Lorsange returned the note to Therese; "Continue, my dear child," said she, "the man's behavior is horrifying; to be swimming in gold and to deny her legitimate earnings to a poor creature who merely did not want to commit a crime, that is a gratuitous infamy entirely without example."

Увы! Мадам, Тереза ​​продолжила, продолжая ее рассказ, я был в слезы в течение двух дней из-за этого ужасного письма; Я был намного больше пораженный мыслью об ужасном поступке, который он засвидетельствовал, чем отказ, который он содержал. Тогда я застонала, потом я виновата, вот я Я второй раз осудил за то, что был чрезмерно с уважением к закону! Так и быть, я ничего не раскаиваюсь, я никогда не буду Наименьшее угрызение совести, пока моя душа чиста, и пусть я никогда нести ответственность за любое зло, кроме того, что слишком много прислушался к справедливым и добродетельным чувствам, которые никогда не оставь меня

Я, однако, просто не мог поверить, что занятия и Упоминания графа были действительно правдивы, потому что они казались очень неправдоподобно: для него было бы так опасно иметь меня привел в суд, что я предполагал, что есть гораздо большая причина для его напугать перспективой столкнуться со мной, чем У меня была причина дрожать перед его угрозами. Эти размышления привели меня решить остаться там, где я был, и, если возможно, остаться до увеличение моих средств может позволить мне двигаться дальше; Я общался мой план Родену, который одобрил его, и даже предложил мне сохранить палата в его доме; но прежде всего, прежде чем говорить о том, что я решил сделать, надо дать вам представление об этом человеке и его окружение.

Родину было сорок лет, темноволосый, с косматыми бровями, сверкающий яркий глаз; была о нем какая особая сила и здоровье, но в то же время разврат. По богатству он был поднялся намного выше своей родной станции, имея от десяти до двенадцати тысяча фунтов в год; благодаря чему, если бы Роден практиковал его хирургическое искусство - не по необходимости, а по вкусу; у него был очень привлекательный дом в Сен-Марселе, который после смерти его жена два года назад, он поделился с двумя девушками, которые были его слуги, и с другим, который был его собственной дочерью. Этот молодой человек, по имени Розали, только что достиг четырнадцатого года; в в ней были собраны все прелести, наиболее способные возбудить восхищение: фигура нимфы, овальное лицо, ясное, милое, необычайно анимированные, нежные красивые черты, очень пикантные ну, самый красивый из возможных ртов, очень большие темные глаза, проникновенные и полный чувств, каштановые волосы падают ниже ее талии, кожа невероятной белизны ... сияющая, гладкая, уже самая красивое горло во всем мире, а кроме того, остроумие, бодрость, и одна из самых прекрасных душ, которые Природа еще создала. С участием уважение к товарищам, с которыми я должен был служить в этом по дому, это были две крестьянские девушки: одна из них была гувернанткой, другой повар. Та, кто занимал первый пост, могла быть двадцать пять, остальные восемнадцать или двадцать, и оба были чрезвычайно привлекательным; их внешность предполагала осознанный выбор, и это в Поворот вызвал рождение некоторых подозрений относительно того, почему Роден был доволен чтобы разместить меня. Зачем ему третья женщина? я попросил сам, и почему он хочет, чтобы они все были красивыми? Конечно, я продолжение, во всем этом есть что-то, что мало соответствует обычные манеры, от которых я хочу никогда не уходить; посмотрим.

В результате я попросил месье Родена позволить мне продлить мое выздоровление в его доме в течение еще одной недели, объявив, что в конце этого времени он получил бы мой ответ на то, что он имел очень любезно предложено.

Я получил прибыль от этого интервала, присоединившись к Розали, решившая обосноваться только в доме ее отца если бы не оказалось ничего об этом, откуда я мог бы быть обязан обижаться. С этими конструкциями я оцениваю бросает взгляд в разные стороны, и на следующий день я заметил что этот человек пользовался договоренностью, которая сразу же спровоцировала я в ярости сомневаюсь в его поведении.

 

16.

 

Месье Роден содержал школу для детей обоего пола; во время его всю жизнь жены он получил требуемый устав, и они имели не считал нужным лишать его этого после того, как он ее потерял. месье Учеников Родена было мало, но отборных: всего их было только четырнадцать девочки и четырнадцать мальчиков: он никогда не принимал их до двенадцати и их всегда высылали по достижении шестнадцатилетнего возраста; никогда у монарха были более красивые предметы, чем у Родена. Если бы были доставлены в тот, кто имел какой-то физический дефект или лицо, которое оставило что-то чтобы быть желанным, он знал, как придумать двадцать оправданий для отказа ему, все его аргументы были очень изобретательны, они всегда были окрашены софистикой, на которую никто не мог ответить; таким образом, либо его корпус маленьких учеников был неполным, или дети, которые их наполняли, всегда были очаровательны. Эти молодые люди сделали не ел с ним, а приходил два раза в день, с семи до одиннадцать утра, с четырех до восьми вечера. Если до тогда я еще не видел всей этой маленькой труппы, потому что прибыв к Родену во время каникул, его ученые не были посещение занятий; к концу моего выздоровления они появились снова.

Родин сам взял на себя ответственность за обучение мальчиков, его гувернантку присматривал за девушками, которых он посетит, как только он закончил свои собственные уроки; он учил своих юных учеников писать, арифметика, немного истории, рисования, музыки, и при всем этом нет другой мастер, но сам был нанят.

Я рано выразил удивление Розали, что ее отец, выполняя свои функции врача, мог одновременно выступать в роли учителя школы; мне показалось странным, сказал я, жить комфортно, не занимаясь ни тем, ни другим из этих профессий он посвятил себя обеим. Розали, которая теперь очень полюбил меня, засмеялся над моим замечанием; манера, в которой она реагировала на то, что я сказал, сделала меня более любопытно, и я умолял ее открыть себя полностью для меня.

"Listen," said that charming girl, speaking with all the candor proper to her age, and all the naivete of her amiable character; "listen to me, Therese, I am going to tell you everything, for I see you are a well brought up girl... incapable of betraying the secret I am going to confide to you.

"Certainly, dear friend, my father could make ends meet without pursuing either of these two occupations; and if he pursues both at once, it is because of the two motives I am going to reveal to you. He practices medicine because he has a liking for it; he takes keen pleasure in using his skill to make new discoveries, he has made so many of them, he has written so many authoritative texts based upon his investigations that he is generally acknowledged the most accomplished man in France at the present time; he worked for twenty years in Paris, and for the sake of his amusements he retired to the country. The real surgeon at Saint-Marcel is someone named Rombeau whom he has taken under his tutelage and with whom he collaborates upon experiments; and now, Therese, would you know why he runs a school?... Libertinage, my child, libertinage alone, a passion he carries to its extremes. My father finds in his pupils of either sex objects whose dependence submits them to his inclinations, and he exploits them.... But wait a moment ... come with me," said Rosalie, "today is Friday, one of the three days during the week when he corrects those who have misbehaved; it is in this kind of punishment my father takes his pleasure; follow me, I tell you, you shall see how he behaves. Everything is visible from a closet in my room which adjoins the one where he concludes his business; let's go there without making any noise, and above all be careful not to say a word both about what I am telling you and about what you are going to witness."

It was a matter of such great importance to familiarize myself with the customs of this person who had offered me asylum, that I felt I could neglect nothing which might discover them to me; I follow hard upon Rosalie's heels, she situates me near a partition, through cracks between its ill-joined boards one can view everything going on in the neighboring room.

Hardly have we taken up our post when Rodin enters, leading a fourteen-year-old girl, blond and as pretty as Love; the poor creature is sobbing away, all too unhappily aware of what awaits her; she comes in with moans and cries; she throws herself down before her implacable instructor, she entreats him to spare her, but his very inexorability fires the first sparks of the unbending Rodin's pleasure, his heart is already aglow, and his savage glances spring alive with an inner light....

"Why, no, no," he cries, "not for one minute, this happens far too frequently, Julie, I repent my forbearance and leniency, their sole result has been repeated misconduct on your part, but could the gravity of this most recent example of it possibly allow me to show clemency, even supposing I wished to? A note passed to a boy upon entering the classroom!"

"Sir, I protest to you, I did not -"

"Ah I but I saw it, my dear, I saw it."

"Don't believe a word of it," Rosalie whispered to me, "these are trifles he invents by way of pretext; that little creature is an angel, it is because she resists him he treats her harshly."

Meanwhile, Rodin, greatly aroused, had seized the little girl's hands, tied them to a ring fitted high upon a pillar standing in the middle of the punishment room. Julie is without any defense... any save the lovely face languishingly turned toward her executioner, her superb hair in disarray, and the tears which inundate the most beautiful face in the world, the sweetest... the most interesting. Rodin dwells upon the picture, is fired by it, he covers those supplicating eyes with a blindfold, approaches his mouth and dares kiss them, Julie sees nothing more, now able to proceed as he wishes, Rodin removes the veils of modesty, her blouse is unbuttoned, her stays untied, she is naked to the waist and yet further below.... What whiteness! What beauty! These are roses strewn upon lilies by the Graces' very hands... what being is so heartless, so cruel as to condemn to torture charms so fresh... so poignant? What is the monster that can seek pleasure in the depths of tears and suffering and woe? Rodin contemplates... his inflamed eye roves, his hands dare profane the flowers his cruelties are about to wither; all takes place directly before us, not a detail can escape us: now the libertine opens and peers into, now he closes up again those dainty features which enchant him; he offers them to us under every form, but he confines himself to these only: although the true temple of Love is within his reach, Rodin, faithful to his creed, casts not so much as a glance in that direction, to judge by his behavior, he fears even the sight of it; if the child's posture exposes those charms, he covers them over again; the slightest disturbance might upset his homage, he would have nothing distract him... finally, his mounting wrath exceeds all limits, at first he gives vent to it through invectives, with menaces and evil language he affrights this poor little wretch trembling before the blows wherewith she realizes she is about to be torn; Rodin is beside himself, he snatches up a cat-o'-nine-tails that has been soaking in a vat of vinegar to give the thongs tartness and sting. "Well there," says he, approaching his victim, "prepare yourself, you have got to suffer"; he swings a vigorous arm, the lashes are brought whistling down upon every inch of the body exposed to them; twenty-five strokes are applied; the tender pink rosiness of this matchless skin is in a trice run into scarlet.

Julie emits cries... piercing screams which rend me to the soul; tears run down from beneath her blindfold and like pearls shine upon her beautiful cheeks; whereby Rodin is made all the more furious.... He puts his hands upon the molested parts, touches, squeezes, worries them, seems to be readying them for further assaults; they follow fast upon the first, Rodin begins again, not a cut he bestows is unaccompanied by a curse, a menace, a reproach... blood appears... Rodin is in an ecstasy; his delight is immense as he muses upon the eloquent proofs of his ferocity. He can contain himself no longer, the most indecent condition manifests his overwrought state; he fears not to bring everything out of hiding, Julie cannot see it... he moves to the breech and hovers there, he would greatly like to mount as a victor, he dares not, instead, he begins to tyrannize anew; Rodin whips with might and main and finally manages, thanks to the leathern stripes, to open this asylum of the Graces and of joy.... He no longer knows who he is or where; his delirium has attained to such a pitch the use of reason is no longer available to him; he swears, he blasphemes, he storms, nothing is exempt from his savage blows, all he can reach is treated with identical fury, but the villain pauses nevertheless, he senses the impossibility of going further without risking the loss of the powers which he must preserve for new operations.

"Dress yourself," he says to Julie, loosening her bonds and readjusting his own costume, "and if you are once again guilty of similar misconduct, bear it firmly in mind you will not get off quite so lightly."

Julie returns to her class, Rodin goes into the boys' and immediately brings back a young scholar of fifteen, lovely as the day; Rodin scolds him; doubtless more at his ease with the lad, he wheedles and kisses while lecturing him.

"You deserve to be punished," he observes, "and you are going to be."

Having uttered these words, he oversteps the last bounds of modesty with the child; for in this case, everything is of interest to him, nothing is excluded, the veils are drawn aside, everything is palpated indiscriminately; Rodin alternates threats, caresses, kisses, curses; his impious fingers attempt to generate voluptuous sentiments in the boy and, in his turn, Rodin demands identical ministrations.

"Very well," cries the satyr, spying his success, "there you are in the state I forbade.... I dare swear that with two more movements you'd have the impudence to spit at me...."

But too sure of the titillations he has produced, the libertine advances to gather a homage, and his mouth is the temple offered to the sweet incense; his hands excite it to jet forth, he meets the spurts, devours them, and is himself ready to explode, but he wishes to persevere to the end.

"Ah, I am going to make you pay for this stupidity!" says he and gets to his feet.

He takes the youth's two hands, he clutches them tight, and offers himself entirely to the altar at which his fury would perform a sacrifice. He opens it, his kisses roam over it, his tongue drives deep into it, is lost in it. Drunk with love and ferocity, Rodin mingles the expressions and sentiments of each....

"Ah, little weasel!" he cries, "I must avenge myself upon the illusion you create in me."

The whips are picked up, Rodin flogs; clearly more excited by the boy than he was by the vestal, his blows become both much more powerful and far more numerous: the child bursts into tears, Rodin is in seventh heaven, but new pleasures call, he releases the boy and flies to other sacrifices. A little girl of thirteen is the boy's successor, and she is followed by another youth who is in turn abandoned for a girl; Rodin whips nine: five boys, four girls; the last is a lad of fourteen, endowed with a delicious countenance: Rodin wishes to amuse himself, the pupil resists; out of his mind with lust, he beats him, and the villain, losing all control of himself, hurls his flame's scummy jets upon his young charge's injured parts, he wets him from waist to heels; enraged at not having had strength enough to hold himself in check until the end, our corrector releases the child very testily, and after warning him against such tricks in the future, he sends him back to the class: such are the words I heard, those the scenes which I witnessed.

"Dear Heaven!" I said to Rosalie when this appalling drama came to its end, "how is one able to surrender oneself to such excesses? How can one find pleasure in the torments one inflicts ?"

"Ah," replied Rosalie, "you do not know everything. Listen," she said, leading me back into her room, "what you have seen has perhaps enabled you to understand that when my father discovers some aptitudes in his young pupils, he carries his horrors much further, he abuses the girls in the same manner he deals with the boys." Rosalie spoke of that criminal manner of conjugation whereof I myself had believed I might be the victim with the brigands' captain into whose hands I had fallen after my escape from the Conciergerie, and by which I had been soiled by the merchant from Lyon. "By this means," Rosalie continued, "the girls are not in the least dishonored, there are no pregnancies to fear, and nothing prevents them from finding a husband; not a year goes by without his corrupting nearly all the boys in this way, and at least half the other children. Of the fourteen girls you have seen, eight have already been spoiled by these methods, and he has taken his pleasure with nine of the boys; the two women who serve him are submitted to the same horrors.... O Therese! " Rosalie added, casting herself into my arms, "O dear girl, and I too, yes I, he seduced me in my earliest years; I was barely eleven when I became his victim... when, alas! I was unable to defend myself against him."

"But Mademoiselle," I interrupted, horrified, "at least Religion remained to you... were you unable to consult a confessor and avow everything?"

"Oh, you do not know that as he proceeds to pervert us he stifles in each of us the very seeds of belief, he forbids us all religious devotions, and, furthermore, could I have done so ? he had instructed me scarcely at all. The little he had said pertaining to these matters had been motivated by the fear that my ignorance might betray his impiety. But I had never been to confession, I had not made my First Communion; so deftly did he cover all these things with ridicule and insinuate his poisonous self into even our smallest ideas, that he banished forever all their duties out of them whom he suborned; or if they are compelled by their families to fulfill their religious duties, they do so with such tepidness, with such complete indifference, that he has nothing to fear from their indiscretion; but convince yourself, Therese, let your own eyes persuade you," she continued, very quickly drawing me back into the closet whence we had emerged; "come hither: that room where he chastises his students is the same wherein he enjoys us; the lessons are over now, it is the hour when, warmed by the preliminaries, he is going to compensate himself for the restraint his prudence sometimes imposes upon him; go back to where you were, dear girl, and with your own eyes behold it all."

Несмотря на небольшое любопытство в отношении этих новых мерзостей, это было гораздо лучше прыгнуть обратно в шкаф, а чем я удивился с Розали во время занятий; Родин Без сомнения, стали бы подозрительными. И вот я взял свой место; едва ли я на это, когда Родин входит в комнату своей дочери, он ведет ее в другую, приходят две женщины из дома; а также Вслед за этим Родин, все его ограничения сдерживают удален, свободен, чтобы потворствовать своим фантазиям в полной мере, отдает себя неторопливо и безоговорочно к совершению всех неровности разврата. Два крестьянина, полностью обнаженные, порется с чрезмерным насилием; в то время как он кладет свой кнут на один другой платит ему в натуральной форме, и в течение промежутков времени, когда он делает паузу для отдыха, он душит самым раскованным, самым отвратительные ласки, тот же алтарь в Розали, который вознес на слегка наклоненное кресло подносит его ему; наконец там приходит очередь этого бедного существа: Родин привязывает ее к колу, как он связал своих ученых, и хотя один за другим, а иногда и в как только его прислуга сдирает его, он бьет свою дочь, бьет ее от ее ребра на колени, полностью перенесенные от удовольствия. Его агитация экстремальна: он кричит, он богохульствует, он жгутирует: его стринги глубоко кусаются везде, и там, где они падают, там немедленно он прижимает свои губы. И интерьер алтаря и рот его жертвы ... все, за исключением пред-конца, все поглощено его сосанием; без изменения расположение других, довольствуясь тем, что делает его более благоприятный, Роден постепенно проникает в узкое место удовольствия убежища; Между тем, гувернантка предлагает тот же трон его поцелуи, другая девушка бьет его всеми остальными Сила, Роден на седьмом небе, он толкает, он раскалывается, он слезы, тысяча поцелуев, один более страстный, чем другой, выражая свой пыл, он целует все, что преподносится его вожделению: взрывы бомбы и развратный распутник смеет попробовать самый сладкий из прелести в раковине инцеста и позора ...

Роден сел обедать; после таких подвигов он нуждался в пломбировочные. В тот день было больше уроков и дальше исправления, я мог бы наблюдать новые сцены, если бы я хотел, но я видел достаточно, чтобы убедить себя и согласиться с ответом на сделать к предложениям этого злодея. Время для этого подошло. Через два дня после описанных мною событий он сам пришел ко мне комната, чтобы попросить это. Он удивил меня в постели. Используя оправдание чтобы посмотреть, остались ли какие-либо следы моих ран, он получил право, которое я не мог оспорить, осмотр меня, голый, и, как он сделал то же самое дважды день в течение месяца и никогда не оскорблял мою скромность я Я не думал, что смог сопротивляться. Но на этот раз у Родена были другие планы; когда он достигает объекта своего поклонения, он запирает бедра вокруг моей талии и сжимает с такой силой, что я нахожу Я, так сказать, совершенно беззащитен.

"Therese," says he, the while moving his hands about in such a manner as to erase all doubt of his intents, "you are fully recovered, my dear, and now you can give me evidence of the gratitude with which I have beheld your heart overflowing; nothing simpler than the form your thanks would take; I need nothing beyond this," the traitor continued, binding me with all the strength at his command. "...Yes, this will do, merely this, here is my recompense, I never demand anything else from women... but," he continued, " 'tis one of the most splendid I have seen in all my life... What roundness, fullness!... unusual elasticity!... what exquisite quality in the skin!... Oh my! I absolutely must put this to use...."

 

17.

 

Whereupon Rodin, apparently already prepared to put his projects into execution, is obliged, in order to proceed to the next stage, to relax his grip for a moment; I seize my opportunity and extricating myself from his clutches,

"Monsieur," I say, "I beg you to be well persuaded that there is nothing in the entire world which could engage me to consent to the horrors you seem to wish to commit. My gratitude is due to you, indeed it is, but I will not pay my debt in a criminal coin. Needless to say, I am poor and most unfortunate; but no matter; here is the small sum of money I possess," I continue, producing my meager purse, "take what you esteem just and allow me to leave this house, I beg of you, as soon as I am in a fitting state to go."

Rodin, confounded by the opposition he little expected from a girl devoid of means and whom, according to an injustice very ordinary amongst men, he supposed dishonest by the simple fact she was sunk in poverty; Rodin, I say, gazed at me attentively.

"Therese," he resumed after a minute's silence, "Therese, it is hardly appropriate for you to play the virgin with me; I have, so it would seem to me, some right to your complaisance; but, however, it makes little difference: keep your silver but don't leave me. I am highly pleased to have a well-behaved girl in my house, the conduct of these others I have about me being far from impeccable... Since you show yourself so virtuous in this instance, you will be equally so, I trust, in every other. My interests would benefit therefrom; my daughter is fond of you, just a short while ago she came and begged me to persuade you not to go; and so rest with us, if you will, I invite you to remain."

"Monsieur," I replied, "I should not be happy here; the two women who serve you aspire to all the affection you are able to give them; they will not behold me without jealousy, and sooner or later I will be forced to leave you."

"Be not apprehensive," Rodin answered, "fear none of the effects of these women's envy, I shall be quite capable of keeping them in their place by maintaining you in yours, and you alone will possess my confidence without any resultant danger to yourself. But in order to continue to deserve it, I believe it would be well for you to know that the first quality, the foremost, I require in you, Therese, is an unassailable discretion. Many things take place here, many which do not sort with your virtuous principles; you must be able to witness everything, hear all and never speak a syllable of it.... Ah, Therese, remain with me, stay here, Therese, my child, it will be a joy to have you; in the midst of the many vices to which I am driven by a fiery temper, an unrestrainable imagination and a much rotted heart, at least I will have the comfort of a virtuous being dwelling close by, and upon whose breast I shall be able to cast myself as at the feet of a God when, glutted by my debauches, I..." "Oh Heaven!" I did think at this moment, "then Virtue is necessary, it is then indispensable to man, since even the vicious one is obliged to find reassurance in it and make use of it as of a shelter." And then, recollecting Rosalie's requests that I not leave her, and thinking to discern some good principles in Rodin, I resolved to stay with him.

"Therese," Rodin said to me several days later, "I am going to install you near my daughter; in this way, you will avoid all frictions with the other two women, and I intend to give you three hundred pounds wages."

Such a post was, in my situation, a kind of godsend; inflamed by the desire to restore Rosalie to righteousness, and perhaps even her father too Were I able to attain some influence over him, I repented not of what I had just done... Rodin, having had me dress myself, conducted me at once to where his daughter was; Rosalie received me with effusions of joy, and I was promptly established.

Ere a week was gone by I had begun to labor at the conversions after which I thirsted, but Rodin's intransigence defeated all my efforts.

"Do not believe," was the response he made to my wise counsels, "тот вид почтения, который я проявил к добродетели в тебе, доказывает что я либо уважаю добродетель, либо хочу отдать предпочтение вице. Ничего подобного, Тереза, не должно быть, чтобы обмануть себя; на основании того, что я сделал в вашем отношении, любой кто должен был, как следствие моего поведения, важность или необходимость добродетели упадет в самую большую ошибку, и извините, если бы вы представили, что такова моя мода мышления. Деревенская лачуга, к которой я чиню укрытие, когда, во время охоты падает чрезмерное тепло солнечных лучей перпендикулярно на меня, эта хижина, конечно, не ошибаться для превосходящего здания: его ценность просто косвенная: я подвергаются какой-то опасности, я нахожу что-то, что позволяет защита, я использую это, но это что-то грандиознее на этом учетная запись? это может быть менее презренным? В совершенно порочном общество, добродетель была бы совершенно бесполезной; наши общества не будучи целиком и полностью этого вида добродетель или использовать его, чтобы меньше бояться его верные последователи. Если никто не принимает добродетельный путь, он становится бесполезный; Тогда я не ошибаюсь, когда утверждаю, что необходимость ничего, кроме мнения или обстоятельств; добродетель не какая-то вид режима, значение которого неоспоримо, это просто схема поведение, способ ладить, который меняется в зависимости от несчастных случаев географии и климата и, следовательно, не имеет никакой реальности, тот, который один показывает свою тщетность. Только то, что постоянно действительно хорошо; какие изменения навсегда не могут утверждать, что характеристика: вот почему они заявили, что неизменность принадлежит к числу вечных совершенств; но добродетель полностью без этого качества: нет, на весь глобус, две расы, которые добродетельны одинаково; следовательно, добродетель ни в каком смысле не реальна и ни в каком смысле не является по сути хорошей и ни в коем случае не заслуживает нашего почтения. Как это использовать? как опора, как устройство: политически принять достоинство страна одна обитает, так что те, кто этим занимается, либо потому что у них есть вкус к этому или кто должен развивать его из-за их положение, оставит вас в покое, и чтобы эта добродетель который уважают в вашем районе, гарантирует вам, его обычный перевес против нападений, совершенных те, кто исповедуют порок. Но, опять же, все, что на диктовке переменных обстоятельств, и ничего во всем, что назначает реальный заслуга добродетели. Кроме того, существуют такие достоинства, как невозможно определенным мужчинам; теперь, как вы собираетесь убедить меня что добродетель в конфликте или в противоречии со страстями быть найденным в природе? И если это не в природе, а в природе; как это может быть хорошо? В тех людях, о которых мы говорим, наверняка пороки против этих добродетелей, и эти пороки будут предпочтительнее этими людьми, так как они будут единственными модами ... единственными схемами бытия, который будет полностью согласен с их особенностью физические конституции или их необычные органы; в этом Гипотеза, тогда будут некоторые очень полезные пороки: ну, как может быть полезным, если вы продемонстрируете мне, что противоречит к добродетели полезно? В ответ на это можно услышать, что добродетель полезно для других, и что в этом смысле это хорошо; ибо если это предположил, что я должен делать только то, что хорошо для других, в свою очередь, я получит только хорошее. И этот аргумент является чистой софистикой: в вернуть за небольшое количество добра, которое я получаю от других благодаря добродетели, которую они практикуют, мое обязательство практиковать добродетель в свою очередь заставляет меня приносить миллион жертв, ради которых я нахожусь в нет мудрой компенсации. Получая меньше, чем я даю, я, следовательно, заключаю очень невыгодная сделка, я испытываю гораздо больше лишения, которые я терплю, чтобы быть добродетельным, чем я испытываю добро от тех, кто делает это со мной; договоренность не совсем поэтому я не должен подчиняться этому, и определенно добродетельные, чтобы не доставлять другим столько удовольствия, сколько я получаю от боли заставить себя быть хорошим, не лучше ли сдаться приносить им счастье, которое должно стоить мне столько страданий? Теперь остается вред, который я могу причинить другим, будучи порочным и зло, которое я сам перенесу, если бы все были похожи на меня. Были ли мы признать эффективную циркуляцию пороков, я, конечно, я представляю серьезную опасность; но горе испытал то, что я рискую, компенсируется тем удовольствием, которое я получаю, вызывая других быть под угрозой: и там! Вы видите, равенство восстановлено: и все более или менее одинаково счастливы, что не так и не может быть так в обществе, где одни хороши, а другие плохо, потому что, из этой смеси, вечные подводные камни в результате! и нет Подводные камни существуют в другом случае. В гетерогенном обществе все интересы одинаковы: у вас есть источник бесконечного количество страданий; напротив, все интересы идентичны, каждый человек, составляющий его, снабжен одинаковыми склонности, одни и те же перья, каждый идет вместе со всеми другие и с той же целью; они все счастливы. Но, идиоты жаловаться тебе, зло не делает для счастья. Нет не когда все согласились поклоняться добру; но просто прекратить выигрывать, вместо этого выкачивайте, оскорбляйте то, что вы называете добром, и вы не будете больше почитать что угодно, кроме того, что раньше у тебя был идиотизм зло; и каждый человек будет иметь удовольствие совершить это не в все, потому что это будет разрешено (это может быть, в некоторых случаях, повод для уменьшения его апелляции), а потому закон больше не наказывать это, и это закон, через страх это вдохновляет, что уменьшает удовольствие, которое видит природа в преступлении. Я представляю себе общество, в котором оно будет принято этот инцест (давайте включим это преступление вместе со всеми другие), этот инцест, я говорю, является преступным: те, кто совершает инцест будет несчастным, потому что мнение, законы, убеждения, все будет концерт, чтобы расслабить их удовольствие; те, кто воздерживается от этого зло, те, кто из-за этих ограничений не посмеют, будут в равной степени несчастный: таким образом, закон, запрещающий инцест, ничего, кроме причины несчастья. Теперь я представляю другое общество соседний первый; в этом инцесте нет никакого преступления: те, кто не воздерживаются, не будут несчастны, и те, кто желают этого, будут будь счастлив. Следовательно, общество, которое разрешает этот акт, будет лучше подходит для человечества, чем тот, в котором акт представлен как преступление; то же самое относится ко всем другим поступкам, неуклюжим уголовное; рассматривайте их с этой точки зрения, и вы создаете толпы несчастных людей; разрешите их, а жалобу не слушайте; ибо тот, кто лелеет этот поступок, каким бы он ни был, идет о выполняя это в тишине и покое, и тот, кто не заботится об этом либо остается в нейтральном безразличии к нему, что конечно, не больно, или находит возмещение за боль, которую он может иметь поддержано, прибегая к множеству других травм, в связи с чем в его он превращает его в тех, кто его обидел; преступное общество либо очень счастливое, либо в раю безразличный; следовательно, ничего хорошего, ничего респектабельный, ничего, что может принести счастье в том, что они Зов добродетели. Пусть те, кто следует добродетельным путем, не будут хвастливо гордится уступками, которые нам принесли структурные особенности нашего общества; Это просто вопрос обстоятельств, случайность соглашения, что почтение требовало от нас принять добродетельная форма; но на самом деле это поклонение является галлюцинацией, и добродетель, которая получает немного благочестивого внимания на мгновение не на этот счет тем благороднее."

Such was the infernal logic of Rodin's wretched passions; but Rosalie, gentle and less corrupt, Rosalie, detesting the horrors to which she was submitted, was a more docile auditor and more receptive to my opinions. I had the most ardent desire to bring her to discharge her primary religious duties; but we would have been obliged to confide in a priest, and Rodin would not have one in the house; he beheld them, and the beliefs they professed, with horror: nothing in the world would have induced him to suffer one to come near his daughter; to lead the girl to a confessor was equally impossible: Rodin never allowed Rosalie to go abroad unless he accompanied her. We were therefore constrained to bide our time until some occasion might present itself; and while we waited I instructed the young person; by giving her a taste for virtue, I inspired in her another for Religion, I revealed to her its sacred dogmas and its sublime mysteries, and I so intimately attached these two sentiments to her youthful heart that I rendered them indispensable to her life's happiness.

"O Mademoiselle," I said one day, my eyes welling with tears at her compunction, "может ли человек ослепить себя до такой степени, чтобы поверить что ему не суждено лучше? Не факт, что он имеет был наделен способностью сознания своего Бога достаточное доказательство того, что это благословение не было предоставлено ему сохранить для выполнения обязанностей, которые оно налагает? Ну, что может быть основанием почитания мы обязаны Вечному, если это не так добродетель которого он является примером? Может ли Создатель так много чудеса есть, кроме хороших законов? И могут ли наши сердца быть приятными Ему, если их элемент не хорош? Мне кажется, что для чувствительные духи, единственные действительные мотивы любви к этому Всевышнему Бытие должно быть вдохновляет благодарность. Разве это не одолжение, таким образом, заставили нас наслаждаться красотами этой вселенной? и мы не должны ли Он дать некоторую благодарность в обмен на такое благословение? Но еще более сильный разум устанавливает, подтверждает универсальную цепь нашего обязанности; почему мы должны отказываться выполнять то, что требует Его указы, так как они те же самые, которые объединяют наши счастье среди смертных? Разве не сладко чувствовать, что человек оказывает быть достойным Высшего Существа, просто практикуя эти добродетели, которые должны вызвать наше удовлетворение на земле, и что средства, которые делают нас достойными жить среди наших братьев, идентичные, которые дают нам уверенность в перерождении, в жизнь еще впереди, рядом с престолом Бога! Ах, Розали! как слепы те, кто стремится изгнать эту нашу надежду! Ошибочные, успокоенные, соблазненные своими убогими страстями, они предпочитают отрицать вечные истины, а не отказываться от того, что может сделать их заслуживая их. Они скорее скажут: «Эти люди обманывают нас» чем признать, что они обманывают себя; затянувшаяся мысль о том, что они готовятся потерять неприятности их в их бунт и спорт; им кажется менее страшным уничтожить надежду на Небеса, чем быть лишенным того, что приобретет для них! Но когда эти тиранические страсти окончательно ослабевают и исчезают в них, когда вуаль срывается, когда в ней больше ничего не остается их съеденные болезнью сердца, чтобы противостоять властному голосу этого Боже, их бред пренебрежительно несправедлив, О Розали! что должно будь это жестокое пробуждение я и сколько сопутствующего ему раскаяния должен раздуть цену, которая должна быть заплачена за ошибку, Я ослепил их. Таково состояние, при котором человек должен быть в чтобы истолковать его правильное поведение: это ни когда пьянство, ни когда в транспорте, вызванном горящей лихорадкой, он должен верить или его высказывания отмечены, но когда его причина успокаивается и наслаждается своей полной ясной энергией, которую он должен искать после правда, тогда он предугадывает и видит это. «Тогда со всеми нашими будучи тоскующим после этого Священного из тех, кем мы когда-то были пренебрежительно; мы умоляем Его, Он становится всем нашим утешением; мы молимся Он слышит наши уговоры. Ах, почему тогда я должен отрицать Его, почему Должен ли я быть невнимательным к этому объекту так необходимо для счастья? Почему Должен ли я сказать с заблудшим человеком, что Бога нет, в то время как сердце разумной части человеческого рода каждое мгновение предлагает мне доказательства существования этого Божественного Существа? Тогда лучше мечтать среди сумасшедших, чем правильно думать с мудрыми? Все тем не менее вытекает из этого первоначального принципа: немедленно существует Бог, этот Бог заслуживает поклонения, и первичный Основой этого культа бесспорно является Добродетель."

Из этих элементарных истин я легко вывел другие и Деистическая Розали вскоре стала христианином. Но какими средствами я повторяю, могу ли я присоединиться к небольшой практике морали? Розали, обязан повиноваться своему отцу, может, в лучшем случае, сделать не больше, чем покажи ей отвращение к нему, и с таким человеком, как Роден, не стать опасным? Он был неразрешимым; не одно из моих учений победил его; но хотя я не победил его, он для его часть, по крайней мере, не поколебала меня.

Тем не менее, такая академия, опасность такая постоянная, такая реальная, мне трепетать за Розали, настолько сильно, что на самом деле я не мог найти Я в любом мудром виноват в том, чтобы привлечь ее, чтобы вылететь из этого извращенного домашнее хозяйство. Мне показалось, что вырвать ее из ее кровосмесительного отец был меньшим злом, чем оставить свою жертву перед всеми рисками она должна бежать, оставаясь с ним. Я уже деликатно намекнул на идея и, возможно, я был не так уж далек от успеха, когда все внезапно Розали исчезла из дома; все мои усилия, чтобы выяснить, где она провалилась Когда я допрашивал его женщин или самого Родена Мне сказали, что она ушла, чтобы провести летние месяцы с родственником который жил в десяти лигах. Когда я делал запросы по всему окрестности, они были сначала удивлены, услышав такой вопрос от члена семьи, а также Родена и его прислуга, они ответят, что ее видели, у всех было простился с ней накануне, в день, когда она ушла; я получил одни и те же ответы везде. Я спросил Родена, почему этот отъезд держался в секрете от меня; почему мне не разрешили сопровождать госпожа? Он заверил меня, что единственной причиной было избежать сцены трудно и для Розали, и для меня, и что я непременно увижу человек, которого я любил очень скоро. Я должен был быть доволен этим ответы, но было сложнее убедиться в их истинности. Было ли это предположительно, что Розали Ä и как велика была ее любовь к я, я ... мог бы согласиться оставить меня без единого слова? и согласно тому, что я знал о характере Родена, там не было бояться за судьбу бедной девочки? Я решил использовать каждый устройство, чтобы узнать, что с ней случилось, и чтобы узнать, каждое средство казалось оправданным.

На следующий день, заметив, что я был один в доме, я тщательно исследовал каждый угол этого; Я думал, что поймал звук стоны, исходящие из очень темного погреба ... Я подошел; куча дров, казалось, блокировал узкую дверь в конце проход; Удаляя препятствия, я могу продвинуться ... дальнейшие шумы должны быть услышаны ... Я верю, что я слышу голос ... Я слушай внимательнее ... я больше не сомневаюсь.

"Therese," I hear at last, "O Therese, is it you?"

"Yes, my dear, my most tender friend," I cry, recognizing Rosalie's accents.... "Yes, 'tis Therese Heaven sends to your rescue . . ."

И мои многочисленные вопросы едва ли позволят этой интересной девушке время ответить. Наконец я узнаю, что за несколько часов до нее исчезновение, Ромбо, друг и коллега Родена, исследовал она голая и что она получила приказ от своего отца готовая подвергнуться, от рук Ромбо, тем же ужасам Родена подвергать ее каждый день; что она сопротивлялась; этот Роден, в ярости, схватил ее и сам представил ее своему компаньону яростные атаки; что затем двое мужчин говорили вместе в шепчет очень долго, оставляя ее голой какое-то время, и периодически обновляя свои ощущения, они продолжали развлекать сами с ней таким же преступным способом и плохо обращались ее сотней разных способов; что после этой сессии, которая имела длилось четыре или пять часов, Родин наконец сказал, что собирается отправить ее в страну, чтобы навестить одного из ее семьи, но она должен уйти сразу и не разговаривая с Терезой, по причинам, которые он объяснил бы послезавтра, потому что он собирался присоединиться к ней немедленно. Он дал Розали понять, что он хочет жениться она и это составляло экзамен, который дал ей Ромбо, который должен был определить, способна ли она стать мать. Розали действительно осталась под опекой старухи; она пересекла город, попутно попрощавшись с несколько знакомых; но сразу наступила ночь, ее проводница привела ее обратно в дом ее отца; она вошла в полночь. Родин, который ждал ее, схватил ее, имел положил ладонь ей на рот, чтобы подавить ее голос, и без словом, погрузил ее в этот погреб, где, по правде говоря, она была прилично хорошо кормили и ухаживали.

"I have everything to fear," the poor thing added; "my father's conduct toward me since he put me here, his discourses, what preceded Rombeau's examination, everything, Therese, everything suggests that these monsters are going to use me in one of their experiments, and that your poor Rosalie is doomed."

After copious tears had flowed from my eyes, I asked the unhappy girl whether she knew where the key to the cellar was kept; she did not; but she did not believe their custom was to take it with them. I sought for it everywhere; in vain; and by the time the hour arrived œor me to return upstairs I had been able to give the dear child no more by way of aid than consoling words, a few hopes, and many tears. She made me swear to come back the next day; I promised, even assuring her that if by that time I had discovered nothing satisfactory regarding her, I would leave the house directly, fetch the police and extricate her, at no matter what price, from the terrible fate threatening her.

 

18.

 

I went up; Rombeau was dining with Rodin that evening. Determined to stick at nothing to clarify my mistress' fate, I hid myself near the room where the two friends were at table, and their conversation was more than enough to convince me of the horror of the project wherewith both were occupied.

It was Rodin who was speaking: "Anatomy will never reach its ultimate state of perfection until an examination has been performed upon the vaginal canal of a fourteen- or fifteen-year-old child who has expired from a cruel death; it is only from the contingent contraction we can obtain a complete analysis of a so highly interesting part."

"The same holds true," Rombeau replied, "for the hymeneal membrane; we must, of course, find a young girl for the dissection. What the deuce is there to be seen after the age of puberty? nothing; the menstrual discharges rupture the hymen, and all research is necessarily inexact; your daughter is precisely what we need; although she is fifteen! she is not yet mature; the manner in which we have enjoyed her has done no damage to the membranous tissue, and we will be able to handle her with complete immunity from interference. I am delighted you have made up your mind at last."

"Oh, I certainly have," Rodin rejoined; "I find it odious that futile considerations check the progress of science; did great men ever allow themselves to be enslaved by such contemptible chains? And, when Michelangelo wished to render a Christ after Nature, did he make the crucifixion of a young man the occasion for a fit of remorse? Why no: he copied the boy in his death agonies. But where it is a question of the advance of our art, how absolutely essential such means become I And how the evil in permitting them dwindles to insignificance! Only think of it! you sacrifice one, but you save a million, perhaps; may one hesitate when the price is so modest? Is the murder operated by the law of a species different from the one we are going to perform? and is not the purpose of those laws, which are commonly found so wise, the sacrifice of one in order to save a thousand?"

"But what other way can one approach the problem?" Rombeau demanded; "there is certainly no other by which to obtain any information. In those hospitals where I worked as a young man I saw similar experiments by the thousand; but in view of the ties which attach you to this creature, I must confess I was afraid you would hesitate."

"What! because she is my daughter? A capital reason!" Rodin roared, "и какое звание вы тогда себе представляете? в моем сердце? Я ставлю примерно одинаковое значение (взвешивая вопрос очень мило) на маленькую сперму, которая вынашивала свою цыпочку, и на это я рад тратить, наслаждаясь собой. Один имеет сила вернуть то, что дал; среди ни одной расы, которая когда-либо было ли на земле оспаривание права распоряжаться своих детей по своему усмотрению. Персы, мидяне, Армяне-греки пользовались этим правом в полной мере. Конституция, указанная Ликургом, этот образец законодателей, а не только отцы имеют полное право на потомство, но даже приговоренных к смерти тех детей, родители не хотели кормить, или те, которые были обнаружены уродливыми. Большая доля дикарей народы убивают своих молодых сразу же после рождения. Почти все женщины из Азии, Африки и Америки делают аборты и не по этой причине покрыта дискредитацией; Повар обнаружил обычай широко распространен на всех островах Южного моря. Ромул разрешен детоубийство; закон двенадцати таблиц так же терпимо и до эпохи Константина римляне разоблачили или убили их дети безнаказанно Аристотель рекомендовал это притворное преступление; стоическая секта считала это достойным похвалы; это все еще очень в использовать в Китае. Каждый день считаются, лежа на улицах и плавая в каналах Пекина, более десяти тысяч человек оставленные или оставленные их родителями, и в этом мудро управляемом империя, какой бы ни был возраст ребенка, отец должен, но положить его в руки судьи, чтобы избавиться от этого. По законам Парфяне, один убил своего сына, свою дочь или своего брата, даже в возрасте зрелости; Цезарь открыл обычай универсальный среди галлов; несколько отрывков в Пятикнижии доказывают, что среди детей Божьих было разрешено убивать своих детей; и, наконец, Сам Бог приказал Аврааму сделать именно это. это было долго верил, заявляет известный современный автор, что процветание империй зависит от рабства детей; это Мнение поддерживается здравой логикой. Почему! монарх будет воображать себя уполномоченным пожертвовать двадцать или тридцать тысяч его предметы в один день, чтобы достичь своих целей, и отец не должно быть позволено, когда он считает это благоприятным, стать мастер жизни своих детей! Какой абсурд! О глупость! Ох что эта непоследовательность, эта слабость в тех, на кого такие цепи обязательны! Власть отца над своими детьми, единственная реальная один, тот, который служит основой для каждого другого, эта власть продиктовано нам голосом самой Природы, и разумным изучение ее операций дает примеры этого на каждом шагу и мгновенное. Царь Петр не сомневался в этом праве; он использовал это обычно и обратился с публичным заявлением ко всем приказам его империя, в которой он сказал, что, согласно законам человека и божественный, отец имел полное и абсолютное право приговорить его дети до смерти, без апелляции и без консультации с мнением никого вообще. Это нигде, но в нашей собственной варварской Франции ложная и смехотворная жалость могла подавить это прерогатива. нет," Rodin pursued with great feeling, "no, my friend, I will never understand how a father, who had the kindness to provide it with life, may not be at liberty to bestow death upon his issue. 'Tis the ridiculous value we attach to this life which eternally makes us speak drivel about the kind of deed to which a man resorts in order to disencumber himself of a fellow creature. Believing that existence is the greatest of all goods, we stupidly fancy we are doing something criminal when we convey someone away from its enjoyment; but the cessation of this existence, or at least what follows it, is no more an evil than life is a good; or rather, if nothing dies, if nothing is destroyed, if nothing is lost to Nature, if all the decomposed parts of any body whatsoever merely await.dissolution to reappear immediately under new forms, how indifferent is this act of murder! and how dare one find any evil in it? In this connection I ought to act according to nothing but my own whim; I ought to regard the thing as very simple indeed, especially so when it becomes necessary to an act of such vital importance to mankind... when it can furnish such a wealth of knowledge: henceforth it is an evil no longer, my friend, it is no longer a crime, no, not a petty misdemeanor, it is the best, the wisest, the most useful of all actions, and crime would exist only in refusing oneself the pleasure of committing it."

"Ha!" said Rombeau, full of enthusiasm for these appalling maxims, "I applaud you, my dear fellow, your wisdom enchants me, but your indifference is astonishing; I thought you were amorous -"

"I? in love with a girl?... Ah, Rombeau! I supposed you knew me better; I employ those creatures when I have nothing better to hand: the extreme penchant I have for pleasures of the variety you have watched me taste makes very precious to me all the temples at which this sort of incense can be offered, and to multiply my devotions, I sometimes assimilate a little girl into a pretty little boy; but should one of these female personages unhappily nourish my illusion for too long, my disgust becomes energetically manifest, and I have never found but one means to satisfy it deliciously... you understand me, Rombeau; Chilperic, the most voluptuous of France's kings, held the same views. His boisterous organ proclaimed aloud that in an emergency one could make use of a woman, but upon the express condition one exterminated her immediately one had done with her.

 

( Cf. a work entitled ‘The Jesuits in Fine Fettle’)

For five years this little wench has been serving my pleasures; the time has come for her to pay for my loss of interest by the loss of her existence."

The meal ended; from those two madmen's behavior, from their words, their actions, their preparations, from their very state, which bordered upon delirium, I was very well able to see that there was not a moment to be lost, and that the hour of the unhappy Rosalie's destruction had been fixed for that evening. I rushed to the cellar, resolved to deliver her or die.

"O dear friend," I cried, "there is not an instant to waste... the monsters ... it is to be tonight ... they are going to come...."

And upon saying that, I make the most violent efforts to batter down the door. One of my blows dislodges something, I reach out my hand, it is the key, I seize it, I hasten to open the door... I embrace Rosalie, I urge her to fly, I promise to follow her, she springs forward... Just Heaven! It was again decreed that Virtue was to succumb, and that sentiments of the tenderest commiseration were going to be brutally punished; lit by the governess, Rodin and Rombeau appeared of a sudden, the former grasped his daughter the instant she crossed the threshold of the door beyond which, a few steps away, lay deliverance.

"Ah, wretch, where are you going?" Rodin shouts, bringing her to a halt while Rombeau lays hands upon me.... "Why," he continues, glancing at me, "here's the rascal who has encouraged your flight! Therese, now we behold the results of your great virtuous principles... the kidnapping of a daughter from her father!"

"Certainly," was my steadfast reply, "and I must do so when that father is so barbarous as to plot against his daughter's life."

"Well, well! Espionage and seduction," Rodin pursued; "all a servant's most dangerous vices; upstairs, up with you, I say, the case requires to be judged."

Dragged by the two villains, Rosalie and I are brought back to the apartments; the doors are bolted. The unlucky daughter of Rodin is tied to the posts of a bed, and those two demoniacs turn all their rage upon me, their language is of the most violent, the sentence pronounced upon me appalling: it is nothing less than a question of a vivisection in order to inspect the beating of my heart, and upon this organ to make observations which cannot practicably be made upon a cadaver. Meanwhile, I am undressed, and subjected to the most impudicious fondlings.

"Before all else," says Rombeau, "my opinion is a stout attack ought to be delivered upon the fortress your lenient proceedings have respected.... Why, 'tis superb! do you mark that velvet texture, the whiteness of those two half-moons defending the portal! never was there a virgin of such freshness."

"Virgin! but so she is, or nearly," says Rodin, "once raped, and then it was despite her wishes; since then, untouched. Here, let me take the wheel a moment..." and the cruel one added to Rombeau's his homage made up of those harsh and savage caresses which degrade rather than honor the idol. Had whips been available I should have been cruelly dealt with; whips were indeed mentioned, but none were found, they limited themselves to what the bare hand could achieve; they set me afire... the more I struggled, the more rigidly I was held; when however I saw them about to undertake more serious matters, I flung myself prostrate before my executioners and offered them my life.

"But when you are no longer a virgin," said Rombeau, "what is the difference? What are these qualms? we are only going to violate you as you have been already and not the least peccadillo will sit on your conscience; you will have been vanquished by force..." and comforting me in this manner, the infamous one placed me on a couch.

"No," spoke up Rodin, interrupting his colleague's effervescence, of which I was on the brink of becoming the victim, "no, let's not waste our powers with this creature; remember we cannot further postpone the operations scheduled for Rosalie, and our vigor is necessary to carry them out; let's punish this wretch in some other manner."

Upon saying which, Rodin put an iron in the fire. "Yes," he went on, "let's punish her a thousand times more than we would were we to take her life, let's brand her; this disgrace, joined to all the sorry business about her body, will get her hanged if she does not first die of hunger; until then she will suffer, and our more prolonged vengeance will become the more delicious."

Wherewith Rombeau seized me, and the abominable Rodin applied behind my shoulder the red-hot iron with which thieves are marked.

"Let her dare appear in public, the whore," the monster continued, exhibiting the ignominious letter, "and I'll sufficiently justify my reasons for sending her out of the door with such secrecy and promptitude."

They bandage me, dress me, and fortify me with a few drops of brandy, and under the cover of night the two scientists conduct me to the forest's edge and abandon me cruelly there after once again having sketched what dangers a recrimination would expose me to were I to dare bring complaint in my present state of disgrace.

Anyone else might have been little impressed by the menace; what would I have to fear as soon as I found the means to prove that what I had just suffered had been the work not of a tribunal but of criminals? But my weakness, my natural timidity, the frightful memory of what I had undergone at Paris and recollections of the chateau de Bressac Ä it all stunned me, terrified me; I thought only of flight, and was far more stirred by anguish at having to abandon an innocent victim to those two villains, who were without doubt ready to immolate her, than I was touched by my own ills. More irritated, more afflicted morally than in physical pain, I set off at once; but, completely unoriented, never stopping to ask my way, I did but swing in a circle around Paris and on the fourth day of traveling I found I had got no further than Lieursaint. Knowing this road would lead me to the southern provinces, I resolved to follow it and try to reach those distant regions, fancying to myself that the peace and calm so cruelly denied me in those parts of France where I had grown up were, perhaps, awaiting me in others more remote; fatal error! how much there remained of grief and pain yet to experience.

 

19.

 

Какими бы ни были мои испытания до того времени, по крайней мере, я был в владение моей невиновностью. Просто жертва нескольких монстров попыток, я все еще мог считать себя более или менее в категория честной девушки. Дело в том, что я никогда не был по-настоящему запятнанный спасите от изнасилования эксплуатируемого пятью годами ранее, и его следы исцелился ... изнасилование завершилось в тот момент, когда мое оцепенение даже не оставил мне способности ощущения. Кроме того, что было ли в чем я мог упрекнуть себя? Ничего, ах! ничего, несомненно; и мое сердце было целомудренным, я чрезмерно гордился этим, мое предположение должно было быть наказано; безобразия, ожидающие меня, должны были быть таким, что в скором времени это будет невозможно, каким бы незначительным не было мое участие, чтобы я сформировал то же самое Утешительные идеи в глубине моего сердца.

На этот раз у меня было целое состояние обо мне; то есть о сто крон, составляющих всего того, что я спас от Брессак и клатчи заработали от Родена. В своем крайнем страдании я был в состоянии чувствовать радость, что эти деньги, по крайней мере, не были взяты из меня; Я польщился тем, что благодаря бережливости, умеренность и экономика, к которой я привык, эта сумма достаточно, пока я не окажусь в таком положении, чтобы найти место какой-то Испытание, которое они только что отпечатали на моей плоти, не показывать, я предполагал, что всегда смогу замаскировать его и что этот бренд не был бы баром, чтобы зарабатывать на жизнь. Мне было двадцать два лет, в добром здравии, и имел лицо, которое, к моему сожалению, было объект восхваления слишком частый; Я обладал некоторыми достоинствами который, хотя они и принесли мне неизлечимую травму, тем не менее, как я только что сказал вам, все мое утешение и заставил меня надеяться, что небеса наконец-то дадут мне, если не награды, по крайней мере, некоторая приостановка зла, которое они опустили на меня. Полный надежд и смелости, я держал свой путь, пока я не получил Сенс, где я отдыхал несколько дней. Неделю от этого и я полностью восстановлена; Возможно, я мог бы найти работу в этом городе, но, проникнутый необходимостью уйти дальше, я возобновил путешествовать с целью поиска счастья в Дофине; я имел много слышал об этой провинции, мне показалось, что счастье пришло ко мне там, и мы увидим, с каким успехом я его искал.

Никогда, ни в одном из обстоятельств моей жизни, не было настроения религии покинули меня. Презирая тщетные казуистры сильных мыслителей, полагая, что все они исходят от разврат, а не следование твердому убеждению, я имел одели мою совесть и свое сердце против них и посредством и то, и другое, я нашел то, что было нужно для того, чтобы сделать их полный ответ. К моим несчастьям часто приходится пренебрегать моим благочестивым обязанности, я бы сделал компенсацию за эти недостатки всякий раз, когда я мог найти возможность.

Я только что, 7 августа, покинул Осер; Я никогда не буду забудь эту дату. Я прошел около двух лиг: полуденная жара начав бесчувствовать меня, я поднялся на маленькое возвышение, увенчанное роща деревьев; место было недалеко от дороги, я поехал там с целью освежиться и получить несколько часы сна без необходимости платить за гостиницу, и до там я был в большей безопасности, чем на шоссе. Я установил Я у подножия дуба и, после скудного обеда, я дрейфовал в сладкий сон. Хорошо я отдыхал, в течение значительного времени, и в состоянии полного спокойствия; а потом, открыв глаза, это с большим удовольствием размышлял над пейзажем, который был виден на большое расстояние. Из середины леса, что Я подумал, что смогу обнаружить около трех или в четырех лигах от меня была маленькая колокольня в воздух.... "Beloved solitude," I murmured, "what a desire I have to dwell a time in thee; and thou afar," said I, addressing the abbey, "thou must be the asylum of a few gentle, virtuous recluses who are occupied with none but God... with naught but their pious duties; or a retreat unto some holy hermits devoted to Religion alone... men who, far removed from that pernicious society where incessant crime, brooding heavily, threatfully over innocence, degrades it, annihilates it... ah! there must all virtues dwell, of that I am certain, and when mankind's crimes exile them out of the world, 'tis thither they go in that isolated place to commune with the souls of those fortunate ones who cherish them and cultivate them every day."

I was absorbed in these thoughts when a girl of my age, keeper of a flock of sheep grazing upon the plateau, suddenly appeared before my eyes; I question her about that habitation, she tells me what I see is a Benedictine monastery occupied by four solitary monks of peerless devotion, whose continence and sobriety are without example. Once a year, says the girl, a pilgrimage is made to a miraculous Virgin who is there, and from Her pious folk obtain all their hearts' desire. Singularly eager immediately to go and implore aid at the feet of this holy Mother of God, I ask the girl whether she would like to come and pray with me; 'tis impossible, she replies, for her mother awaits her; but the road there is easy. She indicates it to me, she assures me the superior of the house, the most respectable, the most saintly of men, will receive me with perfect good grace and will offer me all the aid whereof I can possibly stand in need. "Dom Severino, so he is called," continues the girl, "is an Italian closely related to the Pope, who overwhelms him with kindnesses; he is gentle, honest, correct, obliging, fifty-five years old, and has spent above two-thirds of his life in France... you will be satisfied with him, Mademoiselle," the shepherdess concluded, "go and edify yourself in that sacred quiet, and you will only return from it improved."

Этот концерт только разжигал мое усердие, тем больше я стал не в состоянии сопротивляться яростному желанию посетить это освященное церковь и там, с помощью нескольких актов благочестия, чтобы восстановить пренебрежение, в котором я был виновен. Как бы велика ни была моя собственная потребность благотворительные организации, я дал девушке корону и отправился в путь ведет к Святой Марии в лесу, как называли монастырь к которому я направил свои шаги.

Когда я спустился на равнину, я мог видеть шпиль нет Больше; для гида у меня не было ничего, кроме леса впереди меня и до долго я начал бояться, что расстояние, о котором я забыл осведомиться, было намного больше, чем я предполагал вначале; но был ни в коем случае не обескуражен. Я прибыл на опушку леса и, какое-то количество дневного света еще осталось, я решил подделать, учитывая, что я должен быть в состоянии добраться до монастыря, прежде чем стемнело. Однако ни один намек на человеческую жизнь не предстал перед моим взгляд, а не дом, и все, что я имел для дороги, был проторенный путь, который я следовал практически наугад; Я уже прошел как минимум пять лиги, не видя ничего, когда звезда полностью перестала освещать вселенную, казалось, я слышал звон колокол ... я слушаю, я двигаюсь к звуку, я спешу, путь расширяется очень мало, наконец, я чувствую несколько изгородей и вскоре после этого монастырь; чем эта изоляция, ничто не может быть более диким, более деревенский, соседнего жилья нет, ближайший - шесть лиги удалены, и густые лесные массивы окружают дом на все стороны; это было в депрессии, у меня было хорошее расстояние спуститься, чтобы добраться до него, и это было причиной, почему я потерял вид на башню; хижина садовника укрыта от стены монастыря; он был там один, прежде чем войти. я потребовал от этого привратника, было ли разрешено говорить с начальник; он попросил, чтобы меня проинформировали о моем поручении; Я посоветовал ему что религиозный долг привлек меня к этому святому убежищу и что я будет хорошо погашен за все трудности, с которыми я столкнулся, чтобы добраться до если бы я мог встать на колени мгновение перед ногами чудесного Богородица и святые церковники, в чьем доме божественный образ был сохранен. Садовник звонит, и я проникаю в монастырь; но, как час вперед, и отцы в ужин, он какое-то время возвращается. Наконец он появляется с одним из монахов:

"Mademoiselle," says he, "here is Dom Clement, steward to the house; he has come to see whether what you desire merits interrupting the superior."

Clement, whose name could not conceivably have been less descriptive of his physiognomy, was a man of forty-eight years, of an enormous bulk, of a giant's stature; somber was his expression, fierce his eye; the only words he spoke were harsh, and they were expelled by a raucous voice: here was a satyric personage indeed, a tyrant's exterior; he made me tremble.... And then despite all I could do to suppress it, the remembrance of my old miseries rose to smite my troubled memory in traits of blood....

"What do you want?" the monk asked me; his air was surly, his mien grim; "is this the hour to come to a church?... Indeed, you have the air of an adventuress."

"Saintly man," said I, prostrating myself, "I believed it was always the hour to present oneself at God's door; I have hastened from far off to arrive here; full of fervor and devotion, I ask to confess, if it is possible, and when what my conscience contains is known to you, you will see whether or not I am worthy to humble myself at the feet of the holy image."

"But this is not the time for confession," said the monk, his manner softening; "where are you going to spend the night? We have no hospice... it would have been better to have come in the morning." I gave him the reasons which had prevented me from doing so and, without replying, Clement went to report to the superior. Several minutes later the church was opened, Don Severino himself approached me, and invited me to enter the temple with him.

Dom Severino, of whom it would be best to give you an idea at once, was, as I had been told, a man of fifty-five, but endowed with handsome features, a still youthful quality, a vigorous physique, herculean limbs, and all that without harshness; a certain elegance and pliancy reigned over the whole and suggested that in his young years he must have possessed all the traits which constitute a splendid man. There were in all the world no finer eyes than his; nobility shone in his features, and the most genteel, the most courteous tone was there throughout. An agreeable accent which colored every one of his words enabled one to identify his Italian origin and, I admit it, this monk's outward graces did much to dispel the alarm the other had caused me.

"My dear girl," said he very graciously, "although the hour is unseasonable and though it is not our usage to receive so late, I will however hear your confession, and afterward we will confer upon the means whereby you may pass the night in decency; tomorrow you will be able to bow down before the sacred image which brings you here."

We enter the church; the doors are closed; a lamp is lit near the confessional. Severino bids me assume my place, he sits down and requests me to tell him everything with complete confidence.

I was perfectly at ease with a man who seemed so mild-mannered, so full of gentle sympathy. I disguised nothing from him: I confessed all my sins; I related all my miseries; I even uncovered the shameful mark wherewith the barbaric Rodin had branded me. Severino listened to everything with keenest attention, he even had me repeat several details, wearing always a look of pity and of interest; but a few movements, a few words betrayed him nevertheless Ä alas! it was only afterward I pondered them thoroughly. Later, when able to reflect calmly upon this interview, it was impossible not to remember that the monk had several times permitted himself certain gestures which dramatized the emotion that had heavy entrance into many of the questions he put to me, and those inquiries not only halted complacently and lingered lovingly over obscene details, but had borne with noticeable insistence upon the following five points: 1. Whether it were really so that I were an orphan and had been born in Paris. 2. Whether it were a certainty I were bereft of kin and had neither friends, nor protection, nor, in a word, anyone to whom I could write. 3. Whether I had confided to anyone, other than to the shepherdess who had pointed out the monastery to me, my purpose in going there, and whether I had not arranged some rendezvous upon my return. 4. Whether it were certain that I had known no one since my rape, and whether I were fully sure the man who had abused me had done so on the side Nature condemns as well as on the side she permits. 5. Whether I thought I had not been followed and whether anyone, according to my belief, might have observed me enter the monastery.

After I had answered these questions in all modesty, with great sincerity, and most naively: "Very well," said the monk, rising and taking me by the hand, "come, my child, tomorrow I shall procure you the sweet satisfaction of communing at the feet of the image you have come to visit; let us begin by supplying your primary needs," and he led me toward the depths of the church....

"Why!" said I, sensing a vague inquietude arise in me despite myself, "what is this, Father? Why are we going inside?"

"And where else, my charming pilgrim?" answered the monk, introducing me into the sacristy. "Do you really fear to spend the night with four saintly anchorites? Oh, we shall find the means to succor you, my dearest angel, and if we do not procure you very great pleasures, you will at least serve ours in their most extreme amplitude." These words sent a thrill of horror through me; I burst out in a cold sweat, I fell to shivering; it was night, no light guided our footsteps, my terrified imagination raised up the specter of death brandishing its scythe over my head; my knees were buckling... and at this point a sudden shift occurred in the monk's speech. He jerked me upright and hissed:

"Whore, pick up your feet and get along; no complaints, don't try resistance, not here, it would be useless."

These cruel words restore my strength, I sense that if I falter I am doomed, I straighten myself. "O Heaven!" I say to the traitor, "must I then be once again my good sentiments' victim, must the desire to approach what is most respectable in Religion be once again punished as a crime..."

We continue to walk, we enter obscure byways, I know not where I am, where I am going. I was advancing a pace ahead of Dom Severino; his breathing was labored, words flowed incoherently from his lips, one might have thought he was drunk; now and again he stopped me, twined his left arm about my waist while his right hand, sliding beneath my skirts from the rear, wandered impudently over that unseemly part of ourselves which, likening us to men, is the unique object of the homages of those who prefer that sex for their shameful pleasures. Several times the libertine even dared apply his mouth to these areas' most secluded lair; and then we recommenced our march. A stairway appears before us; we climb thirty steps or forty, a door opens, brightness dazzles my eyes, we emerge into a charmingly appointed, magnificently illuminated room; there, I see three monks and four girls grouped around a table served by four other women, completely naked. At the spectacle I recoil, trembling; Severino shoves me forward over the threshold and I am in the room with him.

"Gentlemen," says he as we enter, "allow me to present you with one of the veritable wonders of the world, a Lucretia who simultaneously carries upon her shoulder the mark stigmatizing girls who are of evil repute, and, in her conscience, all the candor, all the naivete of a virgin.... One lone violation, friends, and that six years ago; hence, practically a vestal... indeed, I do give her to you as such... the most beautiful, moreover... Oh Clement! how that cheerless countenance of yours will light up when you fall to work on those handsome masses... what elasticity, my good fellow! what rosiness!"

"Ah, fuck!" cried the half-intoxicated Clement, getting to his feet and lurching toward me: "we are pleasantly met, and let us verify the facts."

I will leave you for the briefest possible time in suspense about my situation, Madame, said Therese, but the necessity to portray these other persons in whose midst I discovered myself obliges me to interrupt the thread of my story. You have been made acquainted with Dom Severino, you suspect what may be his predilections; alas, in these affairs his depravation was such he had never tasted other pleasures Ä and what an inconsistency in Nature's operations was here! for with the bizarre fantasy of choosing none but the straiter path, this monster was outfitted with faculties so gigantic that even the broadest thoroughfares would still have appeared too narrow for him.

 

20.

 

Что касается Климента, он уже нарисован для вас. К Изложенные мной недостатки, присоединяйся к свирепости, склонности к сарказм, самое опасное мошенничество, невозмутимость в каждом точка, едкий, сатирический ум, испорченное сердце, жестокие вкусы Роден выставлен со своими молодыми подопечными, без чувств, без деликатности, без религия, темперамент того, кто в течение пяти лет не был в государство, чтобы добывать себе другие радости, кроме тех, ради которых подарил ему аппетит а ты там самый полный характеристика этого ужасного человека.

Антонин, третий главный герой этих отвратительных оргий, был сорок; маленький, маленький из структуры, но очень энергичный, как грозный организованный как Северино и почти такой же злой, как Климент; энтузиаст удовольствий этого коллеги, но отдавая себя им с несколько менее злокачественное намерение; пока Клемент, когда осуществление этой любопытной мании, не имело никакой цели, кроме как раздражать, дразнить женщину, и не мог наслаждаться ею иначе, Антонин используя его с восторгом от всей его естественной чистоты, прибегнул к Жемчужный аспект только для того, чтобы дать дополнительный огонь и дальнейшая энергия ей, которую он чтил со своими услугами. В Одним словом, один был жестоким по вкусу, другой по утонченности.

Джером, старший из четырех отшельников, был также самым развращенный; каждый вкус, каждая страсть, каждый из самых скотских неровности были объединены в душе этого монаха; к капризам буйный в других, он присоединился к тому, чтобы любить получать то, что его товарищи распределены среди девушек, и если он дал (что часто случалось), это всегда было при условии лечения аналогично, в свою очередь: все храмы Венеры были, более того, как один ему, но его полномочия начали уменьшаться и для несколько лет он предпочитал то, что, не требуя усилий агент оставил пациенту задачу пробуждения ощущений и создания экстаза. Рот был его любимым храмом, храм, где он любил лучше всего предлагать, и пока он был в погоне из этих избранных удовольствий он поддержит вторую женщину: она согрел его плетью. Характер этого человека был таким же хитрым, такой же злой, как и у других; в любой форме или аспекте порок мог проявить себя, уверен, что это было немедленно найти зритель в этой адской семье. Вы поймете это больше легко, мадам, если я объясню, как было организовано общество. Потрясающие средства были вылиты орденом в это непристойное учреждение, оно существовало более столетия и имело всегда жили четыре самых богатых монаха, самые могущественные в иерархии Ордена, они самого высокого рождения и развязывание достаточного момента, чтобы потребовать погребения в этом неясном отступление, раскрытие которого секрет был хорошо предоставлен против мои дальнейшие объяснения заставят вас увидеть продолжение; но пусть вернемся к портретам.

Восемь девушек, которые присутствовали на ужине, были так много разделенные по возрасту, я не могу описать их коллективно, но только один одним; что они были так непохожи на свои годы удивил меня, я буду говорить первым из самых молодых и продолжу в заказ.

Этой младшей из девочек едва исполнилось десять лет. нерегулярные черты лица, вид унижения из-за ее судьбы, воздух скорби и трепета.

Второму было пятнадцать: та же беда написана над ней качество, скромность качества, но завораживающее лицо, представляет значительный интерес для всех.

Третьему было двадцать: хорошенькая как картинка, самая красивая блондинка волосы; прекрасные, регулярные, нежные черты лица; она выглядела менее беспокойной, более сломанный к седлу.

Четвертой было тридцать: она была одной из самых красивых женщин мыслимые; искренность, качество, порядочность в ней, и все добродетели нежного духа.

Пятой была девушка тридцати шести лет, беременная шесть месяцев; темно- волосатый, очень живой, с красивыми глазами, но имеющий, так казалось для меня потерял все угрызения совести, все приличия, все сдержанность.

Шестой был того же возраста: высокое существо грандиозного пропорции, истинная великанша, светловолосый, но чья фигура была уже разрушен в избытке плоти; когда я впервые увидел ее, она была голой, и я с готовностью заметил, что ни одна часть ее тела не была не отмеченный признаками жестокости тех злодеев, чьи удовольствия, которым ее несчастная звезда обрекла ее служить.

Седьмого и восьмого были две очень милые женщины лет сорока.

Let us continue with the story of my arrival in this impure place.

I did tell you that no sooner had I entered than each one approached me: Clement was the most brazen, his foul lips were soon glued to my mouth; I twisted away in horror, but I was advised all resistance was pure affectation, pretense, and useless; I should do best by imitating my companions.

"You may without difficulty imagine," declared Dom Severino, "that a recalcitrant attitude will be to no purpose in this inaccessible retreat. You have, you say, undergone much suffering; but that greatest of all woes a virtuous girl can know is yet missing from the catalogue of your troubles. Is it not high time that lofty pride be humbled? and may one still expect to be nearly a virgin at twenty- two? You see about you companions who, upon entering here, like yourself thought to resist and who, as prudence will bid you to do, ended by submitting when they noticed that stubbornness could lead them to incur penalties; for I might just as well declare to you, Therese," the superior continued, showing me scourges, ferules, withes, cords, and a thousand other instruments of torture, "yes, you might just as well know it: there you see what we use upon unmanageable girls; decide whether you wish to be convinced. What do you expect to find here? Mercy? we know it not; humaneness? our sole pleasure is the violation of its laws. Religion? 'tis as naught to us, our contempt for it grows the better acquainted with it we become; allies... kin... friends... judges? there's none of that in this place, dear girl, you will discover nothing but cruelty, egoism, and the most sustained debauchery and impiety. The completest submissiveness is your lot, and that is all; cast a glance about the impenetrable asylum which shelters you: never has an outsider invaded these premises: the monastery could be taken, searched, sacked, and burned, and this retreat would still be perfectly safe from discovery: we are in an isolated outbuilding, as good as buried within the six walls of incredible thickness surrounding us entirely, and here you are, my child, in the midst of four libertines who surely have no inclination to spare you and whom your entreaties, your tears, your speeches, your genuflections, and your outcries will only further inflame. To whom then will you have recourse? to what? Will it be to that God you have just implored with such earnestness and who, by way of reward for your fervor, only precipitates you into further snares, each more fatal than the last? to that illusory God we ourselves outrage all day long by insulting his vain commandments?... And so, Therese, you conceive that there is no power, of whatever species you may suppose, which could possibly deliver you out of our hands, and there is neither in the category of things real nor in that of miracles, any sort of means which might permit you successfully to retain this virtue you yet glory in; which might, in fine, prevent you from becoming, in every sense and in every manner, the prey of the libidinous excesses to which we, all four of us, are going to abandon ourselves with you... Therefore, little slut, off with your clothes, offer your body to our lusts, let it be soiled by them instantly or the severest treatment will prove to you what risks a wretch like yourself runs by disobeying us."

This harangue... this terrible order, I felt, left me no shifts, but would I not have been guilty had I failed to employ the means my heart prompted in me ? my situation left me this last resource: I fall at Dom Severino's feet, I employ all a despairing soul's eloquence to supplicate him not to take advantage of my state or abuse it; the bitterest tears spring from my eyes and inundate his knees, all I Imagine to be of the strongest, all I believe the most pathetic, I try everything with this man.... Great God! what was the use? could I have not known that tears merely enhance the object of a libertine's coveting? how was I able to doubt that everything I attempted in my efforts to sway those savages had the unique effect of arousing them.... "Take the bitch," said Severino in a rage, "seize her, Clement, let her be naked in a minute, and let her learn that it is not in persons like ourselves that compassion stifles Nature." My resistance had animated Clement, he was foaming at the mouth: he took hold of me, his arm shook nervously; interspersing his actions with appalling blasphemies, he had my clothing torn away in a trice.

"A lovely creature," came from the superior, who ran his fingers over my flanks, "may God blast me if I've ever seen one better made; friends," the monk pursued, "let's put order into our procedures; you know our formula for welcoming newcomers: she might be exposed to the entire ceremony, don't you think? Let's omit nothing; and let's have the eight other women stand around us to supply our wants and to excite them."

A circle is formed immediately, I am placed in its center and there, for more than two hours, I am inspected, considered, handled by those four monks, who, one after the other, pronounce either encomiums or criticisms.

You will permit me, Madame, our lovely prisoner said with a blush, to conceal a part of the obscene details of this odious ritual; allow your imagination to figure all that debauch can dictate to villains in such instances; allow it to see them move to and fro between my companions and me, comparing, confronting, contrasting, airing opinions, and indeed it still will not have but a faint idea of what was done in those initial orgies, very mild, to be sure, when matched against all the horrors I was soon to experience.

"Let's to it," says Severino, whose prodigiously exalted desires will brook no further restraint and who in this dreadful state gives the impression of a tiger about to devour its prey, "let each of us advance to take his favorite pleasure." And placing me upon a couch in the posture expected by his execrable projects and causing me to be held by two of his monks, the infamous man attempts to satisfy himself in that criminal and perverse fashion which makes us to resemble none but the sex we do not possess while degrading the one we have; but either the shameless creature is too strongly proportioned, or Nature revolts in me at the mere suspicion of these pleasures; Severino cannot overcome the obstacles; he presents himself, and he is repulsed immediately.... He spreads, he presses, thrusts, tears, all his efforts are in vain; in his fury the monster lashes out against the altar at which he cannot speak his prayers; he strikes it, he pinches it, he bites it; these brutalities are succeeded by renewed challenges; the chastened flesh yields, the gate cedes, the ram bursts through; terrible screams rise from my throat; the entire mass is swifty engulfed, and darting its venom the next moment, robbed then of its strength, the snake gives ground before the movements I make to expel it, and Severino weeps with rage. Never in my life have I suffered so much.

Clement steps forward; he is armed with a cat-o'-nine-tails; his perfidious designs glitter in his eyes.

"'Tis I," says he to Severino, "'tis I who shall avenge you, Father, I shall correct this silly drab for having resisted your pleasures." He has no need of anyone else to hold me; with one arm he enlaces me and forces me, belly down, across his knees; what is going to serve his caprices is nicely discovered. At first, he tries a few blows, it seems they are merely intended as a prelude; soon inflamed by lust, the beast strikes with all his force; nothing is exempt from his ferocity; everything from the small of my back to the lower part of my thighs, the traitor lays cuts upon it all; daring to mix love with these moments of cruelty, he fastens his mouth to mine and wishes to inhale the sighs agony wrests from me... my tears flow, he laps them up, now he kisses, now he threatens, but the rain of blows continues; while he operates, one of the women excites him; kneeling before him, she works with each hand at diverse tasks; the greater her success, the more violent the strokes delivered me; I am nigh to being rent and nothing yet announces the end of my sufferings; he has exhausted every possibility, still he drives on; the end I await is to be the work of his delirium alone; a new cruelty stiffens him: my breasts are at the brute's mercy, he irritates them, uses his teeth upon them, the cannibal snaps, bites, this excess determines the Crisis, the incense escapes him. Frightful cries, terrifying blasphemies, shouts characterize its spurtings, and the monk, enervated, turns me over to Jerome.

&ququot;I will be no more of a threat to your virtue than Clement was," said this libertine as he caressed the blood-spattered altar at which Clement had just sacrificed, "but I should indeed like to kiss the furrows where the plow passed; I too am worthy to open them, and should like to pay them my modest respects; but I should like even more," went on the old satyr, inserting a finger where Severino had lodged himself, "I should like to have the hen lay, and 'twould be most agreeable to devour its egg... does one exist? Why, yes indeed, by God!... Oh, my dear, dear little girl! how very soft..."

His mouth takes the place of his finger... I am told what I have to do, full of disgust I do it. In my situation, alas, am I permitted to refuse? The infamous one is delighted... he swallows, then, forcing me to kneel before him, he glues himself to me in this position; his ignominious passion is appeased in a fashion that cannot justify any complaint on my part. While he acts thus, the fat woman flogs him, another puts herself directly above his mouth and acquits herself of the same task I have just been obliged to execute.

"'Tis not enough," says the monster, "each one of my hands has got to contain... for one cannot get one's fill of these goodies." The two prettiest girls approach; they obey: there you have the excesses to which satiety has led Jerome. At any rate, thanks to impurities he is happy, and at the end of half an hour, my mouth finally receives, with a loathing you must readily appreciate, this evil man's disgusting homage.

Antonin appears. "Well," says he, "let's have a look at this so very spotless virtue; I wonder whether, damaged by a single assault, it is really what the girl maintains." His weapon is raised and trained upon me; he would willingly employ Clement's devices: I have told you that active flagellation pleases him quite as much as it does the other monk but, as he is in a hurry, the state in which his colleague has put me suffices him: he examines this state, relishes it, and leaving me in that attitude of which they are all so fond, he spends an instant pawing the two hemispheres poised at the entrance; in a fury, he rattles the temple's porticos, he is soon at the sanctuary; although quite as violent as Severino's, Antonin's assault, launched against a less narrow passage, is not as painful to endure; the energetic athlete seizes my haunches and, supplying the movements I am unable to make, he shakes me, pulls me to him vivaciously; one might judge by this Hercules' redoubling efforts that, not content to be master of the place, he wishes to reduce it to a shambles. Such terrible attacks, so new to me, cause me to succumb; but unconcerned for my pain, the cruel victor thinks of nothing but increasing his pleasure; everything embraces, everything conspires to his voluptuousness; facing him, raised upon my flanks, the fifteen year-old girl, her legs spread open, offers his mouth the altar at which he sacrifices in me: leisurely, he pumps that precious natural juice whose emission Nature has only lately granted the young child; on her knees, one of the older women bends toward my vanquisher's loins, busies herself about them and with her impure tongue animating his desires, she procures them their ecstasy while, to inflame himself yet further, the debauchee excites a woman with either hand; there is not one of his senses which is not tickled, not one which does not concur in the perfection of his delirium; he attains it, but my unwavering horror for all these infamies inhibits me from sharing it.... He arrives there alone; his jets, his cries, everything proclaims it and, despite myself, I am flooded with the proofs of a fire I am but one of six to light; and thereupon I fall back upon the throne which has just been the scene of my immolation, no longer conscious of my existence save through my pain and my tears... my despair and my remorse.

 

21.

 

However, Dom Severino orders the women to bring me food; but far from being quickened by these attentions, an access of furious grief assails my soul. I, who located all my glory, all my felicity in my virtue, I who thought that, provided I remained well-behaved at all times, I could be consoled for all fortune's ills, I cannot bear the horrible idea of seeing myself so cruelly sullied by those from whom I should have been able to expect the greatest comfort and aid: my tears flowed in abundance, my cries made the vault ring; I rolled upon the floor, I lacerated my breast, tore my hair, invoked my butchers, begged them to bestow death upon me... and, Madame, would you believe it? this terrible sight excited them all the more.

"Ah!" said Severino, "I've never enjoyed a finer spectacle: behold, good friends, see the state it puts me in; it is really unbelievable, what feminine anguish obtains from me."

"Let's go back to work," quoth Clement, "and in order to teach her to bellow at fate, let the bitch be more sharply handled in this second assault."

The project is no sooner conceived than put into execution; up steps Severino, but his speeches notwithstanding, his desires require a further degree of irritation and it is only after having used Clement's cruel measures that he succeeds in marshaling the forces necessary to accomplish his newest crime. Great God! What excess of ferocity! Could it be that those monsters would carry it to the point of selecting the instant of a crisis of moral agony as violent as that I was undergoing, in order to submit me to so barbarous a physical one! "'Twould be an injustice to this novice," said Clement, "were we not to employ in its major form what served us so well in its merely episodic dimension," and thereupon he began to act, adding: "My word upon it, I will treat her no better than did you." "One instant." said Antonin to the superior whom he saw about to lay hands upon me again; "while your zeal is exhaled into this pretty maiden's posterior parts, I might, it seems to me, make an offering to the contrary God; we will have her between us two."

The position was so arranged I could still provide Jerome with a mouth; Clement fitted himself between my hands, I was constrained to arouse him; all the priestesses surrounded this frightful group; each lent an actor what she knew was apt to stir him most profoundly; however, it was I supported them all, the entire weight bore down upon me alone; Severino gives the signal, the other three follow close after him and there I am a second time infamously defiled by the proofs of those blackguards' disgusting luxury.

"Well," cries the superior, "that should be adequate for the first day; we must now have her remark that her comrades are no better treated than she." Я нахожусь на высоком кресле и оттуда я вынужден стать свидетелем тех других ужасов, которые прекратить оргии.

Монахи стоят в очереди; все сестры файл перед ними и получать кнуты от каждого; Далее они обязаны возбудить их мучители с их ртами, а последние мучают и душ оскорбления на них.

Самая младшая из десяти человек сидит на диване и у каждого монаха. делает шаг вперед, чтобы подвергнуть ее пыткам по своему выбору; рядом с ней девушка пятнадцати лет; это с ней каждый монах, после того как вне наказания, получает удовольствие; она задница; старейший в наше время женщина обязана оставаться при монахе выполнение, чтобы быть полезным для него либо в этом операция или акт, который ее завершает. Северино использует только его руки, чтобы приставать к тому, что ему предлагают, и мчится поглотить себя святилище всего его восторга и который она, кого они имеют разместил рядом с ним подарки; вооруженный горсткой крапивы, старшая женщина отвечает ему тем, что он сделал минуту назад ребенку; это в глубине мучительных ударов транспорты развратника родились .... проконсультируйтесь с ним; он признается жестокость? Но он ничего не сделал, он не терпит в свою очередь.

Климент слегка сжимает плоть маленькой девочки; наслаждение предложенный внутри находится за пределами его возможностей, но он рассматривается как он имеет дело с девушкой, и у ног идола он оставляет ладана ему не хватает силы, чтобы швырнуть в его святилище.

Антонин развлекает себя, меся более плотные части тело жертвы; уволенный ее судорожной борьбой, он ускоряет Сам в район предлагал избранным им удовольствиям. В его В свою очередь, он избит, избит, и экстаз - плод его мучений.

Старый Джером использует только свои зубы, но каждый укус оставляет рану откуда кровь прыгает мгновенно вперед; после получения дюжины, цель подает ему открытый рот; в этом его ярость утихла в то время как его укусили так же сильно, как он укусил.

Святые отцы пьют и восстанавливают силы.

Тридцать шесть лет, как и у меня, на шестом месяце беременности. сказал вам, находится на постаменте восемь футов высотой; не в состоянии позировать но одной ногой она обязана держать другую в воздухе; круглый о ней, на полу, украшены матрацы глубиной три фута с шипами, сплайнами, падубом; ей дан гибкий стержень, чтобы она может держать себя в вертикальном положении; Легко видеть, с одной стороны, что это ей интересно не падать, а с другой стороны, что она не может возможно сохранить ее равновесие; альтернативы отвлекают монахов; все четыре из них группируются вокруг нее, во время спектакля у каждого есть один или две женщины, чтобы возбудить его различными способами; отлично с ребенком как она, незадачливое существо остается в этом отношении в течение почти четверть часа; наконец, сила покидает ее, она падает на шипы и наши злодеи, дикие от похоти, последний шаг вперед, чтобы расточить ее тело отвратительно их свирепость дань уважения ... компания уходит в отставку.

Начальник посадил меня на попечение тридцатилетней девочки из которых я упомянул; ее звали Омфал; ей было поручено проинструктировать меня, чтобы поселить меня в моем новом месте жительства. Но в ту ночь я не видел и не слышал ничего. Уничтоженный, отчаянный, я думал о ничего, кроме как захватить немного отдыха. В комнате, где я был Установил, я заметил других женщин, которые не были на ужине; я отложено рассмотрение этих новых объектов до следующего день, и занял себя ничем иным, кроме покоя. Омфал слева я для себя; она пошла спать; едва я ступил в мою, когда полный ужас моих обстоятельств представился для меня в еще более ярких цветах: я не мог рассеять мысль о страдания, от которых я страдал, и от тех, к которым я был свидетель. Увы! если в определенное время эти удовольствия происходили с мое странствующее воображение, я считал их целомудренными, как и Бог Кто вдохновляет их, данные Природой, чтобы утешить людей; Я представлял им продукт любви и деликатности. Я был очень отнюдь не веря этому человеку по примеру диких зверей, мог только наслаждаться ими, заставляя своего спутника содрогаться ... тогда, возвращаясь к моей собственной черной судьбе... "O Just Heaven," I said to myself, "it is then absolutely certain that no virtuous act will emanate from my heart without being answered at once by an agonizing echo! And of what evil was I guilty, Great God! in desiring to come to accomplish some religious duties in this monastery? Do I offend Heaven by wanting to pray? Incomprehensible decrees of Providence, deign," I continued, "deign to open wide my eyes, cause me to see if you do not wish me to rebel against you!" Bitterest tears followed these musings, and I was still inundated with them when daylight appeared; then Omphale approached my bed.

"Dear companion," she said, "I come to exhort you to be courageous; I too wept during my first days, but now the thing has become a habit; as have I, you will become accustomed to it all; the beginnings are terrible: it is not simply the necessity to sate these debauchees' hungers which is our life's torture, it is the loss of our freedom, it is the cruel manner in which we are handled in this terrible house."

The wretched take comfort in seeing other sufferers about them. However trenchant were my anguishes, they were assuaged for an instant; I begged my companion to inform me of the ills I had to expect.

"In a moment," my instructress said, "but first get up and let me show you about our retreat, observe your new companions; then we'll hold our conversation."

Following Omphale's suggestion, I began by examining the chamber we were in. It was an exceedingly large chamber, containing eight little beds covered with clean calico spreads; by each bed was a partitioned dressing room; but all the windows which lit both these closets and the room itself were raised five feet above the floor and barred inside and out. In the middle of the room was a large table, secured to the floor, and it was intended for eating or work; three doors bound and braced with iron closed the room; on our side no fittings or keyholes were to be seen; on the other, enormous bolts.

"And this is our prison?"

"Alas! yes, my dear," Omphale replied; "such is our unique dwelling place; not far from here, the eight other girls have a similar room, and we never communicate with each other save when the monks are pleased to assemble us all at one time."

Я заглянул в нишу, предназначенную для меня; было восемь футов площадь, дневной свет вошел в нее, как в большой комнате, очень высоко Окна обтянуты железом. Единственной мебелью была биде, унитаз и шезлонг. Я вновь появился; мои спутники, стремясь увидеть меня, собрались в круг: их было семь, я сделал Восьмой. Omphale, населявший другую комнату, был только в этом, чтобы внушать мне; если бы я этого пожелал, она бы осталась со мной, и один из других занял бы ее место в ее собственной комнате; я попросил иметь договоренность. Но прежде чем перейти к истории Омфала, мне кажется необходимым описать судьбу семи новых спутников дал мне; Я буду действовать в соответствии с возрастом, как я сделал с другие.

Самому младшему было двенадцать лет: очень оживленный, очень энергичный физиономия, самые красивые волосы, самый красивый рот.

Второму было шестнадцать: она была одной из самых красивых блондинок мыслимый, с по-настоящему восхитительными чертами и всей грацией, всем сладости ее возраста, смешанные с определенным интересным качеством, продукт ее печали, которая сделала ее еще тысячу раз более красивый.

Третьему было двадцать три; очень красиво, но чрезмерно Слишком много наглости, поэтому я подумал, что прелести Природа наделила ее.

Четвертой было двадцать шесть: у нее была фигура Венеры; но возможно, ее формы были слишком ярко выражены; ослепительно светлая кожа; сладкое, открытое, смеющееся лицо, красивые глаза, рот мелкие большие, но великолепно обставленные и превосходные светлые волосы.

Пятому было тридцать два; она была на четвертом месяце беременности; с овальное, несколько меланхоличное лицо, большие одухотворенные глаза; она была очень бледная, ее здоровье было нежным, у нее был гармоничный голос, но отдых казался каким-то испорченным. Она была естественно развратницей: она была, я сказала, изнуряя себя.

Шестому было тридцать три; высокая стройная женщина, самая красивая лицо в мире, самая прекрасная плоть.

Седьмому было тридцать восемь; настоящая модель фигуры и красоты: она была начальником моей комнаты; Омфал предупреждал меня о ней злой характер и, в основном, ее вкус к женщинам.

"To yield is the best way of pleasing her," my companion told me; "resist her, and you will bring down upon your head every misfortune that can befall you in this house. Bear it in mind."

Omphale asked permission of Ursule, which was the superintendent's name, to instruct me; Ursule consented upon condition I kiss her. I approached: her impure tongue sought to attach itself to mine, and meanwhile her fingers labored to determine sensations she was far indeed from obtaining. However, I had to lend myself to everything, my own feelings notwithstanding, and when she believed she had triumphed, she sent me back to my closet where Omphale spoke to me in the following manner:

"All the women you saw yesterday, my dear Therese, and those you have just seen, are divided into four classes, each containing four girls; the first is called the children's class: it includes girls ranging from the most tender age to those of sixteen; a white costume distinguishes them.

"The second class, whose color is green, is called the youthful class; it contains girls of from sixteen to twenty-one.

"The third is the class of the age of reason; its vestments are blue; its ages are from twenty-one to thirty, and both you and I belong to it.

"The fourth class, dressed in reddish brown, is intended for those of mature years; it is composed of anyone over thirty.

"These girls are either indiscriminately mingled at the Reverend Fathers' suppers, or they appear there by class: it all depends upon the whims of the monks but, when not at the meals, they are mixed in the two dormitories, as you are able to judge by those who are lodged in ours.

"The instruction I have to give you," said Omphale, "divides under the headings of four primary articles; in the first, we will treat of what pertains to the house; in the second we will place what regards the behavior of the girls, their punishment, their feeding habits, etc., etc., etc.; the third article will inform you of the arrangement of these monks' pleasures, of the manner in which the girls serve them; the fourth will contain observations on personnel changes.

"Я не буду, Тереза, описывать окрестности этого ужасного дом, потому что вы знакомы с ними, как я; Я буду только обсуждать интерьер; они показали все это мне, чтобы я мог дать картина для новичков, чье образование является одним из моих дел, и в котором, с помощью этого счета, я должен разбить все надежды на побег. Вчера Северино объяснил некоторые его особенности, и он сделал не обманываю тебя, моя дорогая. Церковь и павильон образуют то, что есть правильно называется монастырь; но вы не знаете, где здание, в котором мы живем, находится и как сюда добраться; 'это так: в В глубине ризницы за алтарем скрыта дверь обшивка и открывание пружиной; эта дверь - вход в узкий проход, такой же темный, как и длинный, чьи обмотки ваши ужас при входе помешал вам заметить; туннель спускается сначала, потому что он должен пройти под ровом тридцать футов глубоко, затем он поднимается после рва и, выравнивая, продолжается в глубина не более шести футов под поверхностью; таким образом это прибывает в подвалы нашего павильона, пройдя четверть лиги от церкви; шесть толстых корпусов поднимаются до сбить все попытки увидеть это здание со стороны, даже были один залезть в башню церкви; причина этого Невидимость проста: павильон обнимает землю, ее высоту не достигает двадцати пяти футов, и составные вложения, одни каменные стены, другие живые частоколы, образованные деревьями, растущими в непосредственная близость друг к другу, всего их не менее пятидесяти футов в высоту: с какого бы направления не наблюдалось место, оно может только быть принятым за густой комок деревьев в лесу, никогда за жилье; следовательно, как я уже сказал, с помощью люка выходя в подвалы, человек выходит из темного коридора который я дал вам некоторую идею и которую вы не можете иметь воспоминание с учетом состояния, в котором вы должны были находиться во время ходьбы через это. Этот павильон, моя дорогая, не имеет ничего, кроме подвалы, цокольный этаж, антресоль и первый этаж; над ним там очень толстая крыша, покрытая большим подносом, облицованная свинец, наполненный землей, и в котором высажены вечнозеленые растения кустарники, которые, смешиваясь с окружающими нас экранами, дают все еще более реалистичный вид солидности; форма подвалов большой зал посередине, вокруг него распределены восемь меньших комнаты, две из которых служат темницами для заслуженных девушек тюремное заключение, а остальные шесть зарезервированы для содержания; выше расположены столовая, кухни, кладовые и два кабинеты монахи входят, когда они хотят изолировать свои удовольствия и попробуй их с нами вне поля зрения их коллег; промежуточная история состоит из восьми камер, из которых четыре имеют каждый шкаф: это клетки, где спят монахи и представьте нас, когда их смазывание заставляет нас делиться своими постелями; четыре другие комнаты - комнаты обслуживающих монахов, одна из которых наш тюремщик, еще один слуга монахов, третий врач, имеющий в его камера все, что ему нужно для чрезвычайных ситуаций, и четвертый повар; эти четыре монаха глухонемые; было бы трудно ожидайте, как вы заметили, какого-либо комфорта или помощи от них; более того, они никогда не проходят время в нашей компании, и это запрещено попытка с ними общаться. Над антресолями два seraglios; они одинаковые; как видите, каждая большая камера окаймленный восемью кабинами; Итак, вы понимаете, дорогая девушка, что, Предположим, что один должен был прорваться через решетку в створке и спуститься к окну, все равно будет далеко от возможности бежать, так как осталось бы пять частоколов, крепкая стена и Широкий ров, чтобы пройти: и был ли один, чтобы преодолеть эти препятствия, где бы вы были? Во дворе монастыря, который, Сам надежно закрытый, не позволил бы, в первый момент, очень безопасный выход. Возможно, менее опасное средство спасения будет, I признать, чтобы найти где-то в наших подвалах, открытие в туннель, который ведет; но как мы должны исследовать эти подземные погреба, вечно запертые как мы? был один, чтобы иметь возможность чтобы попасть туда, это отверстие все равно не будет найдено, потому что входит в здание в неведомом нам уголке забаррикадированные грилями, к которым они одни имеют ключ. Однако были все эти трудности преодолены, были одни в коридоре, маршрут все равно не будет более определенным для нас, потому что это усыпаны ловушками, с которыми только они знакомы и в которые всякий, кто пытался пройти через проходы, неизбежно падал без руководства монахов. И поэтому вы должны отказаться от всех мысль о побеге, ибо это невозможно, Тереза; верить я, если бы это было мыслимо, я должен был бы давно покинуть этот отвратительный место, но этого не может быть. Те, кто приходят сюда, никогда не уходят, кроме как их смерть; и отсюда рождается эта наглость, эта жестокость, это тиранию, которую эти злодеи используют с нами; ничто их не разжигает, ничего стимулирует их воображение как безнаказанность, гарантированную им это неприступное отступление; уверен, что никогда не будет других свидетелей их излишества, чем те жертвы, которых они пируют, конечно же их извращения никогда не будут раскрыты, они несут их к самые отвратительные крайности; освобожден от ограничений закона, имея взорвать чеки, которые навязывает религия, не обращая внимания на угрызения совести, нет злодеяний, в которых они не балуются эта криминальная апатия их отвратительные страсти намного больше приятно ушиблено, что ничего, мол, благовония им не нравятся одиночество и тишина, как беспомощность с одной стороны и безнаказанность на другой. Монахи регулярно спят каждую ночь в этом павильоне, они возвращаются сюда в пять часов дня и идут в монастырь на следующее утро в девять, кроме одного из четырех, выбранных ежедневно, который проводит здесь день: он известен как офицер День. Скоро мы увидим его обязанности. Что касается четырех подчиненных братья, они никогда не сдвигаются отсюда; в каждой камере у нас есть колокол который связывается с тюремной камерой; один управляющий имеет право звонить за него, но, когда она делает это во время ее нужны или наши, каждый прибегает мгновенно; когда они вернутся каждый день сами отцы приносят необходимые отдайте их повару, который готовит нам еду в соответствии с их инструкции; в подвалах есть артезианская скважина, Обильные вина всех сортов в погребах. Переходим к вторая статья, которая касается манер девочек, отношение, питание, наказание и т. д..

 

22.


 

"Our number is always maintained constant; affairs are so managed that we are always sixteen, eight in either chamber, and, as you observe, always in the uniform of our particular class; before the day is over you will be given the habit appropriate to the one you are entering; during the day we wear a light costume of the color which belongs to us; in the evening, we wear gowns of the same color and dress our hair with all possible elegance. The superintendent of the chamber has complete authority over us, disobedience to her is a crime; her duty is to inspect us before we go to the orgies and if things are not in the desired state she is punished as well as we. The errors we may commit are of several kinds. Each has its particular punishment, and the rules, together with the list of what is to be expected when they are broken, are displayed in each chamber; the Officer of the Day, the person who comes, as I explained a moment ago, to give us orders, to designate the girls for the supper, to visit our living quarters, and to hear the superintendents' complaints, this monk, I say, is the one who, each evening, metes out punishment to whoever has merited it: here are the crimes together with the punishments exacted for them.

"Неспособность встать утром в установленный час, тридцать удары кнутом (потому что это почти всегда с поркой мы наказанию; вполне можно было ожидать, что эпизод в этих удовольствия развратников стали бы их предпочтительным способом коррекция). Презентация во время приятного акта, либо через недоразумение или по какой-либо причине может быть причиной тело вместо какого-то другого, что было желательно, пятьдесят ударов; неподходящий платье или неподходящая прическа, двадцать ударов; неспособность дать предварительное уведомление о нетрудоспособности из-за менструации, шестьдесят ударов; на день, когда хирург подтверждает существование беременности, сто применяются инсульты; халатность, некомпетентность или отказ в связь с роскошными предложениями, двести ударов. И как часто их адская злоба находит нас желающими на эту голову, без нашего сделав наименьшую ошибку! Как часто случается, что один из они вдруг потребуют то, что он очень хорошо знает, что мы только что предоставили другой и не может сразу сделать снова! Один подвергается наказанию тем не менее; наши протесты, наши просьбы никогда не будут услышаны; кто-то должен либо соблюдай, либо страдай от последствий. Несовершенное поведение в камера или непослушание показано начальником, шестьдесят ударов; появление слез, огорчение, печаль, раскаяние, даже вид малейшее возвращение к религии, двести ударов. Если монах выбирает вас как его партнер, когда он хочет вкусить последний кризис удовольствия и если он не в состоянии достичь этого, будет ли его вина, которая является наиболее обычные, или будь ваши, на месте триста ударов; наименьший намек на отвращение к предложениям монахов, независимо от того, природой этих суждений может быть двести ударов; попытка или согласованный побег или восстание, девять дней заключения в темнице, полностью голая и триста ресниц каждый день; каббалы, разжигание заговоров, посев волнений и т. д. сразу после открытие, триста ударов; прогнозируемое самоубийство, отказ от еды оговоренная еда или необходимое количество, двести ударов; неуважение показано монахам, сто восемьдесят ударов. Те только преступления; помимо того, что там упомянуто, мы можем делать все, что пожелаем, спать вместе, ссориться, бороться, нести пьянство, бунт и Гурманство до крайности, клянусь, богохульство: ничего из этого имеет малейшее значение, мы можем совершить эти ошибки и никогда слово будет сказано нам; нас никто не оценил, кроме тех, кого я только что упоминается. Но если они хотят, суперинтенданты могут сэкономить нам много эти неприятности; однако эта защита, к сожалению, может быть покупается только самоуспокоением, зачастую более неприятным, чем страдания, для которых они являются заменителями; эти женщины в обоих камеры, имеют одинаковый вкус, и это только в соответствии с их благоволит тому, что человек входит в их благодать. Наташа один из них и ей не нужно никаких дополнительных мотивов, чтобы преувеличивать свой отчет о вашей злодеяния, монахи-суперинтенданты служат вдвое больше своих полномочий, и далеко не выговор им за их несправедливость, непрестанно поощряйте это в них; они сами связаны всеми этими правилами и являются более сурово наказан, если их подозревают в снисхождении: развратникам нужно все это, чтобы излить на нас свою ярость, но они добро пожаловать оправдания; вид законности, который может быть придан куску порочность делает его более приятным в их глазах, добавляет к его пикантность, ее шарм. По прибытии сюда каждому из нас предоставляется маленький магазин белья; нам дают все полдюжины, и наши поставки обновляются каждый год, но мы обязаны сдаться что мы приносим сюда с нами; нам не разрешено хранить наименьшее вещь. Жалобы четырех монахов, о которых я говорил, слышны так же, как являются руководителями; их простого отношения достаточно, чтобы обеспечить наше наказание; но они, по крайней мере, ничего не просят у нас и есть меньше бояться с этой четверти, чем от руководителей, которые, когда месть информирует их маневры, очень требовательны и очень опасно. Наша еда отличная и всегда обильная; если бы не это их страсть извлекает выгоду отсюда, эта статья может быть не так удовлетворительно, но так как их грязные развращения приносят прибыль, они Самим безболезненно насытить нас едой: тем, кто имеет склонность к порка стремиться нас откармливать, а те, о которых говорил Иероним вчера, кто любит видеть, как курица лежит, обеспечен обильным кормлением, большей урожайности яиц. Следовательно, мы едим четыре раза в день; в завтрак, с девяти до десяти часов нам регулярно дают au riz, свежие фрукты или компоты, чай, кофе или шоколад; в один o'cl excellence if it is taken with the monks; when we do not join them at table, as often happens, since but four of us from each chamber are allowed to go, we are given three roast plates and four entremets; each of us has a daily ration of one bottle of white wine, one of red, and an half-bottle of brandy; they who do not drink that much are at liberty to distribute their quota to the others; among us are some great gourmands who drink astonishing amounts, who get regularly drunk, all of which they do without fear of reprimand; and there are, as well, some for whom these four meals still do not suffice; they have but to ring, and what they ask for will be brought them at once.

"The superintendents require that the food be consumed, and if someone persists in not wishing to eat, for whatever reason, upon the third infraction that person will be severely punished; the monks' supper is composed of three roast dishes, six entrees followed by a cold plate and eight entremets, fruit, three kinds of wine, coffee and liqueurs: sometimes all eight of us are at table with them, sometimes they oblige four of us to wait upon them, and these four dine afterward; it also happens from time to time that they take only four girls for supper; they are, ordinarily, an entire class; when our number is eight, there are always two from each class. I need hardly tell you that no one ever visits us; under no circumstances is any outsider ever admitted into this pavilion. If we fall ill, we are entrusted to the surgeon friar only, and if we die, we leave this world without any religious ministrations; our bodies are flung into one of the spaces between the circumvallations, and that's an end to it; but, and the cruelty is signal, if the sick one's condition becomes too grave or if there is fear of contagion, they do not wait until we are dead to dispose of us; though still alive, we are carried out and dropped in the place I mentioned; During the eighteen years I have been here I have seen more than ten instances of this unexampled ferocity; concerning which they declare it is better to lose one than endanger sixteen; the loss of a girl, they continue, is of very modest import, and it may be so easily repaired there is scant cause to regret it. Let us move on to the arrangements concerning the monks' pleasures and to all of what pertains to the subject.

"We rise at exactly nine every morning, and in every season; we retire at a later or an earlier hour, depending upon the monks' supper. Immediately we are up, the Officer of the Day comes on his rounds; he seats himself in a large armchair and each of us is obliged to advance, stand before him with our skirts raised upon the side he prefers; he touches, he kisses, he examines, and when everyone has carried out this duty, he identifies those who are to participate at the evening's exercises: he prescribes the state in which they must be, he listens to the superintendent's report, and the punishments are imposed. Rarely does the officer leave without a luxurious scene in which all eight usually find roles. The superintendent directs these libidinous activities, and the most entire submission on our part reigns during them. Before breakfast it often occurs that one of the Reverend Fathers has one of us called from bed; the jailer friar brings a card bearing the name of the person desired, the Officer of the Day sees to it she is sent, not even he has the right to withhold her, she leaves and returns when dismissed. This first ceremony concluded, we breakfast; from this moment till evening we have no more to do; but at seven o'clock in summer, at six in winter, they come for those who have been designated; the jailer friar himself escorts them, and after the supper they who have not been retained for the night come back to the seraglio. Often, all return; other girls have been selected for the night, and they are advised several hours in advance in what costume they must make their appearance; sometimes only the Girls of the Watch sleep out of the chamber."

"Girls of the Watch?" I interrupted. "What function this?" "I will tell you," my historian replied. "Upon the first day of every month each monk adopts a girl who must serve a term as his servant and as the target of his shameful desires; only the superintendents are exempted, for they have the task of governing their chambers. The monks can neither exchange girls during the month, nor make them serve two months in succession; there is nothing more cruel, more taxing than this drudgery, and I have no idea how you will bear up under it. When five o'clock strikes, the Girl of the Watch promptly descends to the monk she serves and does not leave his side until the next day, at the hour he sets off for the monastery. She rejoins him when he comes back; she employs these few hours to eat and rest, for she must remain awake all night throughout the whole of the term she spends with her master; I repeat to you, the wretch remains constantly on hand to serve as the object of every caprice which may enter the libertine's head; cuffs, slaps, beatings, whippings, hard language, amusements, she has got to endure all of it; she must remain standing all night long in her patron'.c bedroom, at any instant ready to offer herself to the passions which may stir that tyrant; but the cruelest, the most ignominious aspect of this servitude is the terrible obligation she is under to provide her mouth or her breast for the relief of the one and the other of the monster's needs: he never uses any other vase: she has got to be the willing recipient of everything and the least hesitation or recalcitrance is straightway punished by the most savage reprisals. During all the scenes of lust these are the girls who guarantee pleasure's success, who guide and manage the monks' joys, who tidy up whoever has become covered with filth: for example, a monk dirties himself while enjoying a woman: it is his aide's duty to repair the disorder; he wishes to be excited? the task of rousing him falls to the wretch who accompanies him everywhere, dresses him, undresses him, is ever at his elbow, who is always wrong, always at fault, always beaten; at the suppers her place is behind her master's chair or, like a dog, at his feet under the table, or upon her knees, between his thighs, exciting him with her mouth; sometimes she serves as his cushion, his seat, his torch; at other times all four of them will be grouped around the table in the most lecherous, but, at the same time, the most fatiguing attitudes. "If they lose their balance, they risk either falling upon the thorns placed near by, or breaking a limb, or being killed, such cases have been known; and meanwhile the villains make merry, enact debauches, peacefully get drunk upon meats, wines, lust, and upon cruelty."

"O Heaven!" said I to my companion, trembling with horror, "is it possible to be transported to such excesses! What infernal place is this!"

"Listen to me, Therese, listen, my child, you have not yet heard it all, not by any means," said Omphale. "Pregnancy, reverenced in the world, is the very certitude of reprobation amongst these villains; here, the pregnant woman is given no dispensations: brutalities, punishments, and watches continue; on the contrary, a gravid condition is the certain way to procure oneself troubles, sufferings, humiliations, sorrows; how often do they not by dint of blows cause abortions in them whose fruits they decide not to harvest, and when indeed they do allow the fruit to ripen, it is in order to sport with it: what I am telling you now should be enough to warn you to preserve yourself from this state as best you possibly can."

"But is one able to ?"

"Of course, there are certain devices, sponges... But if Antonin perceives what you are up to, beware of his wrath; the safest way is to smother whatever might be the natural impression by striving to unhinge the imagination, which with monsters like these is not difficult.

"We have here as well," my instructress continued, "certain dependencies and alliances of which you probably know very little and of which it were well you had some idea; although this has more to do with the fourth article Ä with, that is to say, the one that treats of our recruitings, our retrenchments, and our exchanges Ä I am going to anticipate for a moment in order to insert the following details. "You are not unaware, Therese, that the four monks composing this brotherhood stand at the head of their Order; all belong to distinguished families, all four are themselves very rich: independently of the considerable funds allocated by the Benedictines for the maintenance of this bower of bliss into which everyone hopes to enter in his turn, they who do arrive here contribute a large proportion of their property and possessions to the foundation already established. These two sources combined yield more than a hundred thousand crowns annually which is devoted solely to finding recruits and meeting the house's expenses; they have a dozen discreet and reliable women whose sole task is to bring them every month a new subject, no younger than twelve nor older than thirty. The conscriptee must be free of all defects and endowed with the greatest possible number of qualities, but principally with that of eminent birth. These abductions, well paid for and always effected a great distance from here, bring no consequent discomfitures; I have never heard of any that resulted in legal action; their extreme caution protects them against everything. They do not absolutely confine themselves to virgins: a girl who has been seduced already or a married woman may prove equally pleasing, but a forcible abduction has got to take place, rape must be involved, and it must be definitely verified; this circumstance arouses them; they wish to be certain their crimes cost tears; they would send away any girl who was to come here voluntarily; had you not made a prodigious defense, had they not recognized a veritable fund of virtue in you, and, consequently, the possibility of crime, they would not have kept you twenty-four hours. Everyone here, Therese, comes of a distinguished line; my dear friend, you see before you the only daughter of the Comte de * * *, carried off from Paris at the age of twelve and destined one day to have a dowry of a hundred thousand crowns: I was ravished from the arms of my governess who was taking me by carriage, unoccupied save for ourselves, from my father's country seat to the Abbey of Panthemont where I was brought up; my guardian disappeared; she was in all likelihood bought; I was fetched hither by post chaise. The same applies to all the others. The girl of twenty belongs to one of the noblest families of Poitou. The one sixteen years old is the daughter of the Baron de * * *, one of the greatest of the Lorraine squires; Counts, Dukes, and Margraves are the fathers of the girls of twenty-three, twelve, and thirty-two; in a word, there is not one who cannot claim the loftiest titles, not one who is not treated with the greatest ignominy. But these depraved men are not content to stop at these horrors; they have wished to bring dishonor into the very bosom of their own family. The young lady of twenty-six, without doubt one of the most beautiful amongst us, is Clement's daughter; she of thirty-six is the niece of Jerome.

"As soon as a new girl has arrived in this cloaca, as soon as she has been sealed in here forever to become a stranger to the world, another is immediately retrenched: such is our sufferings' complement; the cruelest of our afflictions is to be in ignorance of what happens to us during these terrible and disquieting dismissals. It is absolutely impossible to say what becomes of one upon leaving this place. From all the evidence we in our isolation are able to assemble, it seems as if the girls the monks retire from service never appear again; they themselves warn us, they do not conceal from us that this retreat is our tomb, but do they assassinate us? Great Heaven! Would murder, the most execrable of crimes, would murder be for them what it was for that celebrated Marechal de Retz,

(See L'Historic de Bretagne by Dom Lobineau: Marechal de Retz: Gilles de Rais, marshal of Charles VII's army.ÄTr.)
a species of erotic entertainment whose cruelty, exalting their perfidious imaginations, were able to plunge their senses into a more intense drunkenness! Accustomed to extracting joy from suffering only, to know no delectation save what is derived from inflicting torment and anguish, would it be possible they were distracted to the point of believing that by redoubling, by ameliorating the delirium's primary cause, one would inevitably render it more perfect; and that, without principles as without faith, wanting manners as they are lacking in virtues, the scoundrels, exploiting the miseries into which their earlier crimes plunged us, were able to find satisfaction in the later ones which snatch our lives away from us.... I don't know.... If one questions them upon the matter, they mumble unintelligibilities, sometimes responding negatively, sometimes in the affirmative; what is certain is that not one of those who has left, despite the promises she made us to denounce these men to the authorities and to strive to procure our liberation, not one, I say, has ever kept her word.... Once again: do they placate us, dissuade us, or do they eliminate the possibility of our preferring charges? What we ask those who arrive for news of them who have gone, they never have any to communicate. What becomes of these wretches? That is what torments me, Therese, that is the fatal incertitude which makes for the great unhappiness of our existence. I have been in this house for eighteen years, I have seen more than two hundred girls depart from it.... Where are they? All of them having sworn to help us, why has not one kept her vow ?

"Nothing, furthermore, justifies our retirement; age, loss of looks, this is not what counts: caprice is their single rule. They will dismiss today the girl they most caressed yesterday, and for ten years they will keep another of whom they are the most weary: such is the story of this chamber's superintendent; she has been twelve years in the house, and to preserve her I have seen them get rid of fifteen-year-old children whose beauty would have rendered the very Graces jealous. She who left a week ago was not yet sixteen; lovely as Venus herself, they had enjoyed her for less than a year, but she became pregnant and, as I told you Therese, that is a great sin in this establishment. Last month they retired one of sixteen, a year ago one of twenty, eight months pregnant; and, recently, another when she began to feel the first pangs of childbirth. Do not imagine that conduct has any bearing upon the matter: I have seen some who flew to do their every bidding and who were gone within six months' time; others sullen, peevish, fantastical whom they kept a great number of years; hence, it is useless to prescribe any kind of behavior to our newly arrived; those monsters' whimsy bursts all circumscriptions, and caprice forms the unique law by which their actions are determined.

 

23.

 

"When one is going to be dismissed, one is notified the same morning, never earlier: as usual, the Officer of the Day makes his appearance at nine o'clock and says, let us suppose, ‘Omphale, the monastery is sending you into retirement; I will come to take you this evening.’ Then he continues about his business. But you do not present yourself for his inspection; he examines the others, then he leaves; the person about to be released embraces her comrades, she makes a thousand promises to strive in their behalf, to bring charges, to bruit abroad what transpires in the monastery: the hour strikes, the monk appears, the girl is led away, and not a word is heard of her. Supper takes place in the usual fashion; we have simply been able to remark that upon these days the monks rarely reach pleasure's ultimate episodes, one might say they proceed gingerly and with unwonted care. However, they drink a great deal more, sometimes even to inebriation; they send us to our chamber at a much earlier hour, they take no one to bed with them, even the Girls of the Watch are relegated to the seraglios."

"Very well," I say to my companion, "if no one has helped you it is because you have had to deal with frail, intimidated creatures, or women with children who dared not attempt anything for you. That they will kill us is not my fear; at least, I don't believe they do: that reasoning beings could carry crime to that point... it is unthinkable... I know that full well... After what I have seen and undergone I perhaps ought not defend mankind as I do, but, my dear, it is simply inconceivable that they can execute horrors the very idea of which defies the imagination. Oh dear companion!" I pursued with great emotion, "would you like to exchange that promise which for my part I swear I will fulfill!... Do you wish it ?"

"Yes."

"Ah, I swear to you in the name of all I hold most holy, in the name of the God Who makes me to breathe and Whom only I adore... I vow to you I will either die in the undertaking or destroy these infamies... will you promise me the same?"

"Do not doubt it," Omphale replied, "but be certain of these promises' futility; others more embittered than you, stauncher, no less resolute and not so scrupulous, in a word, friends who would have shed their last drop of blood for us, have not kept identical vows; and so, dear Therese, and so allow my cruel experience to consider ours equally vain and to count upon them no more."

"And the monks," I said, "do they also vary, do new ones often come here?"

"No," answered Omphale, "Antonin has been here ten years, Clement eighteen, Jerome thirty, Severino twenty-five. The superior was born in Italy, he is closely allied to the Pope with whom he is in intimate contact; only since his arrival have the so-called miracles of the Virgin assured the monastery's reputation and prevented scandalmongers from observing too closely what takes place here; but when he came the house was already furnished as presently you see it to be; it has subsisted in the same style and upon this footing for above a century, and all the superiors who have governed it have perpetuated a system which so amicably smiles upon their pleasures. Severino, the most libertine man of our times, has only installed himself here in order to lead a life consonant with his tastes. He intends to maintain this abbey's secret privileges as long as he possibly can. We belong to the diocese of Auxerre, but whether or not the bishop is informed, we never see him, never does he set foot in the monastery: generally speaking, very few outsiders come here except toward the time of the festival which is that of Notre Dame d'Aout; according to the monks, ten persons do not arrive at this house over the period of a twelvemonth; however, it is very likely that when strangers do present themselves, the superior takes care to receive them with hospitality; by appearances of religion and austerity he imposes upon them, they go away content, the monastery is eulogized, and thus these villains' impunity is established upon the people's good faith and the credulity of the devout."

Omphale had scarcely concluded her instruction when nine o'clock tolled; the superintendent called us to come quickly, and the Officer of the Day did indeed enter. 'Twas Antonin; according to custom, we drew ourselves up in a line. He cast a rapid glance upon the group, counted us, and sat down; then, one by one, we went forward and lifted our skirts, on the one side as high as the navel, on the other up to the middle of the back. Antonin greeted the homage with the blase unconcern of satiety; then, clapping an eye upon me, he asked how I liked this newest of my adventures. Getting no response but tears, "She'll manage," he said with a laugh; "in all of France there's not a single house where girls are finished as nicely as they are in this." From the superintendent's hands he took the list of girls who had misbehaved, then, addressing himself to me again, he caused me to shudder; each gesture, each movement which seemed to oblige me to submit myself to these libertines was for me as a sentence of death. Antonin commanded me to sit on the edge of a bed and when I was in this posture he bade the superintendent uncover my breast and raise my skirt to above my waist; he himself spread my legs as far apart as possible, he seats himself before this prospect, one of my companions comes and takes up the same pose on top of me in such a way that it is the altar of generation instead of my visage which is offered to Antonin; with these charms raised to the level of his mouth he readies himself for pleasure. A third girl, kneeling before him, begins to excite him with her hands, and a fourth, completely naked, with her fingers indicates where he must strike my body. Gradually, this girl begins to arouse me and what she does to me Antonin does as well, with both his hands, to two other girls on his left and right. One cannot imagine the language, the obscene speeches by which that debauchee stimulates himself; at last he is in the state he desires, he is led to me, but everyone follows him, moves with him, endeavors to inflame him yet further while he takes his pleasure; his naked hind parts are exposed, Omphale takes possession of them and neglects nothing in order to irritate him: rubbings, kisses, pollutions, she employs them all; completely afire, Antonin leaps toward me.... "I wish to stuff her this time," he says, beside himself.... These moral deviations determine the physical. Antonin, who has the habit of uttering terrible cries during the final instants of drunkenness, emits dreadful ones; everyone surrounds, everyone serves him, everyone labors to enrich his ecstasy, and the libertine attains it in the midst of the most bizarre episodes of luxury and depravation.

These groupings were frequent; for when a monk indulged in whatever form of pleasure, all the girls regularly surrounded him in order to fire all his parts' sensations, that voluptuousness might, if one may be forgiven the expression, more surely penetrate into him through every pore.

Antonin left, breakfast was brought in; my companions forced me to eat, I did so to please them. We had not quite finished when the superior entered: seeing us still at table, he dispensed us from ceremonies which were to have been identical with those we had just executed for Antonin. "We must give a thought to dressing her," said he, looking at me; and then he opened a wardrobe and threw upon my bed several garments of the color appropriate to my class, and several bundles of linen as well.

"Try that on," he said, "and give me what belongs to you."

Я надел новую одежду и сдал мою старую; но в предвкушение того, чтобы бросить их, у меня было ночью осторожно вытащил мои деньги из карманов и спрятал их в мои волосы. С каждым предметом одежды, который я снимал, Северино пылкий взгляд упал на недавно выставленную особенность, и его руки блуждали по это сразу. Наконец, когда я был полуголым, монах схватил меня, поставьте меня в положение, благоприятное для его удовольствия, то есть в тот, который прямо противоположен тому, что Антонин заставил меня принять; Я хочу попросить его пощадить меня, но слежка за яростью уже зажгла в его глазах я считаю, что послушание - более безопасный путь; Я беру место, остальные образуют кольцо вокруг меня, Северино может видеть ничего, кроме множества этих непристойных алтарей, в которых он благоволит; его руки сходятся на моих, его рот прилипает к нему, его глаза пожирают это ... он на вершине удовольствия.

С вашего одобрения, мадам, сказала прекрасная Тереза, я ограничиться кратким отчетом о первом месяце, который я провел в этом монастыре, то есть я ограничусь периодом главные анекдоты; остальное было бы чистым повторением; однообразие из этого пребывания сделало бы мой утомительный рассказ; немедленно потом, мне кажется, я должен перейти к событиям, которые наконец произвел мое появление из этой ужасной канализации.

Я не посещал ужин в первый день; Я просто был выбран, чтобы провести ночь с Домом Климентом. В соответствии с по обычаю, я был за пределами его камеры за несколько минут до того, как он ожидается возвращение к нему; тюремщик открыл дверь, затем запер ее когда я вошел.

Климент прибывает так же тепло от вина, как от вожделения, за ним следуют двадцатипятилетняя девочка, которая в то время исполняла обязанности его часы; ранее информированный о том, что я должен делать, я падаю на колени как как только я слышу его приход; он приближается ко мне, считает меня покорным позы, затем приказывает мне встать и поцеловать его в губы; он наслаждается поцелуем на несколько мгновений и передает ему все выражение ... всю амплитуду, которую можно себе представить. Тем временем, Арманд, как его назвали в плену, раздевает меня поэтапно; когда нижняя часть поясницы, с которой она начала, выставленный, она велит мне повернуться и показать ее дяде область его вкусы лелеять. Климент рассматривает это, чувствует это, затем, отдыхая сам в кресле, приказывает мне приблизить его, чтобы он мог поцелуй это; Арманд стоит на коленях, пробуждая его своим ртом, Климент помещает его в святилище храма, который я ему представляю и его язык отклоняется от пути в его центре; его руки закрепить на соответствующем алтаре в Арманде, но, как одежду девушка все еще в одежде мешает ему, он приказывает ей избавиться от это, это скоро сделано, и послушное существо возвращается к своему дяде занять позицию, в которой, возбуждая его только рука, она чувствует себя лучше в пределах досягаемости Климента. Нечистый монах непрерывно занят со мной таким же образом, а затем говорит мне чтобы дать как можно больше вентиляции тем ветрам, которые могут зависать в моих недрах, и это я должен направить в его рот; это Эксцентричность показалась мне отвратительной, но я был в то время далеко идеальное знакомство со всеми неровностями разврата: я подчиняюсь и сразу ощутишь эффект этой невоздержанности. Более взволнован, монах становится более страстным: он внезапно прикладывает укусы к шести различные места на мясистых шарах, которые я предоставил в его распоряжение; Я издаю крик и невольно иду вперед, где он стоит, приближается ко мне, ярость пылает в его глазах, и требует ли я знаю, чем я рискую, расстроив его .... я делаю тысячу извиняюсь, он все еще хватает корсет около моего торса, отрывает его, и моя блузка тоже, за меньшее время, чем нужно сказать .... Яростно он схватил мою грудь, извергая оскорбления, когда он сжимает, скручивает, давит их; Арманд раздевает его, и там мы Мы все трое голые. На Арманде его внимание приходит к потерпите на мгновение: он наносит ее дикие удары кулаками; поцелуи ее рот; грызет язык и губы, она кричит; боль сейчас и снова отправляет девушку в неконтролируемые бури плача; у него есть она стоит на стуле и извлекает из нее то, что он хотел от меня. Арманд удовлетворяет его, с одной стороны, я возбуждаю его, и, во время этой роскоши я нежно бью его другим, он тоже кусает Арманд, но она как-то держит себя под контролем, не смея пошевелиться волосы. Зубные следы монстра скоро будут напечатаны на прекрасном плоть девушки; их можно увидеть в нескольких местах; бесцеремонно катится на мне: "Therese," he says, "you are going to suffer cruelly" Ä he had no need to tell me so, for his eyes declared it but too emphatically. "You are going to be lashed everywhere," he continues, "everywhere, without exception," and as he spoke he again laid hands upon my breasts and mauled them brutally, he bruised their extremities with his fingertips and occasioned me very sharp pain; I dared not say a word for fear of irritating him yet more, but sweat bathed my forehead and, willy-nilly, my eyes filled with tears; he turns me about, makes me kneel on the edge of a chair upon whose back I must keep my hands without removing them for a single instant; he promises to inflict the gravest penalties upon me if I lift them; seeing me ready and well within range, he orders Armande to fetch him some birch rods, she presents him with a handful, slender and long; Clement snatches them, and recommending that I not stir, he opens with a score of stripes upon my shoulders and the small of my back; he leaves me for an instant, returns to Armande, brings her back, she too is made to kneel upon a chair six feet from where I am; he declares he is going to flog us simultaneously and the first of the two to release her grip, utter a cry, or shed a tear will be exposed on the spot to whatever torture he is pleased to inflict: he bestows the same number of strokes upon Armande he has just given me, and positively upon the identical places, he returns to me, kisses everything he has just left off molesting, and raising his sticks, says to me, "Steady, little slut, you are going to be used like the last of the damned." Whereupon I receive fifty strokes, all of them directed between the region bordered by the shoulders and the small of the back. He dashes to my comrade and treats her likewise: we pronounce not a word; nothing may be heard but a few stifled groans, we have enough strength to hold back our tears. There was no indication as to what degree the monk's passions were inflamed; he periodically excited himself briskly, but nothing rose. Returning now to me, he spent a moment eyeing those two fatty globes then still intact but about to undergo torture in their turn; he handled them, he could not prevent himself from prying them apart, tickling them, kissing them another thousand times. "Well," said he, "be courageous..." and a hail of blows descended upon these masses, lacerating them to the thighs. Extremely animated by the starts, the leaps, the grinding of teeth, the contortions the pain drew from me, examining them, battening upon them rapturously, he comes and expresses, upon my mouth which he kisses with fervor, the sensations agitating him.... "This girl entertains me," he cries, "I have never flogged another with as much pleasure," and he goes back to his niece whom he treats with the same barbarity; there remained the space between the upper thigh and the calves and this he struck with identical vehemence: first the one of us, then the other. "Ha !" he said, now approaching me, "let's change hands and visit this place here"; now wielding a cat-o'-nine-tails he gives me twenty cuts from the middle of my belly to the bottom of my thighs; then wrenching them apart, he slashed at the interior of the lair my position bares to his whip. "There it is," says he, "the bird I am going to pluck": several thongs having, through the precautions he had taken, penetrated very deep, I could not suppress my screams. "Well, well!" said the villain, "I must have found the sensitive area at last; steady there, calm yourself, we'll visit it a little more thoroughly"; however, his niece is put in the same posture and treated in the same manner; once again he reaches the most delicate region of a woman's body; but whether through habit, or courage, or dread of incurring treatment yet worse, she has enough strength to master herself, and about her nothing is visible beyond a few shivers and spasmodic twitchings. However, there was by now a slight change in the libertine's physical aspect, and although things were still lacking in substance, thanks to strokings and shakings a gradual improvement was being registered.

"On your knees," the monk said to me, "I am going to whip your titties."

"My titties, oh my Father!"

"Yes, those two lubricious masses which never excite me but I wish to use them thus," and upon saying this, he squeezed them, he compressed them violently.

"Oh Father! They are so delicate! You will kill me!"

"No matter, my dear, provided I am satisfied," and he applied five or six blows which, happily, I parried with my hands. Upon observing that, he binds them behind my back; nothing remains with which to implore his mercy but my countenance and my tears, for he has harshly ordered me to be silent. I strive to melt him... but in vain, he strikes out savagely at my now unprotected bosom; terrible bruises are immediately writ out in black and blue; blood appears as his battering continues, my suffering wrings tears from me, they fall upon the vestiges left by the monster's rage, and render them, says he, yet a thousand times more interesting... he kisses those marks, he devours them and now and again returns to my mouth, to my eyes whose tears he licks up with lewd delight. Armande takes her place, her hands are tied, she presents breasts of alabaster and the most beautiful roundness; Clement pretends to kiss them, but to bite them is what he wishes.... And then he lays on and that lovely flesh, so white, so plump, is soon nothing more in its butcher's eyes but lacerations and bleeding. stripes. "Wait one moment," says the berserk monk, "I want to flog simultaneously the most beautiful of behinds and the softest of breasts." He leaves me on my knees and, bringing Armande toward me, makes her stand facing me with her legs spread, in such a way that my mouth touches her womb and my breasts are exposed between her thighs and below her behind; by this means the monk has what he wants before him: Armande's buttocks and my titties in close proximity: furiously he beats them both, but my companion, in order to spare me blows which are becoming far more dangerous for me than for her, has the goodness to lower herself and thus shield me by receiving upon her own person the lashes that would inevitably have wounded me. Clement detects the trick and separates us: "She'll gain nothing by that," he fumes, "and if today I have the graciousness to spare that part of her, 'twill only be so as to molest some other at least as delicate." As I rose I saw that all those infamies had not been in vain: the debauchee was in the most brilliant state; and it made him only the more furious; he changes weapons Ä opens a cabinet where several martinets are to be found and draws out one armed with iron tips. I fall to trembling. "There, Therese," says he showing me the martinet, "you'll see how delicious it is to be whipped with this... you'll feel it, you'll feel it, my rascal, but for the instant I prefer to use this other one..." It was composed of small knotted cords, twelve in all; at the end of each was a knot somewhat larger than the others, about the size of a plum pit. "Come there! Up! The cavalcade!... the cavalcade!" says he to his niece; she, knowing what is meant, quickly gets down on all fours, her rump raised as high as possible, and tells me to imitate her; I do. Clement leaps upon my back, riding facing my rear; Armande, her own presented to him, finds herself directly ahead of Clement: the villain then discovering us both well within reach, furiously cuts at the charms we offer him; but, as this position obliges us to open as wide as possible that delicate part of ourselves which distinguishes our sex from men's, the barbarian aims stinging blows in this direction: the whip's long and supple strands, penetrating into the interior with much more facility than could withes or ferules, leave deep traces of his rage; now he strikes one, now his blows fly at the other; as skilled a horseman as he is an intrepid flagellator, he several times changes his mount; we are exhausted, and the pangs of pain are of such violence that it is almost impossible to bear them any longer. "Stand up," he tells us, catching up the martinet again, "yes, get up and stand in fear of me" Ä his eyes glitter, foam flecks his lips Ä like persons distracted, we run about the room, here, there, he follows after us, indiscriminately striking Armande, myself; the villain brings us to blood; at last he traps us both between the bed and the wall: the blows are redoubled: the unhappy Armande receives one upon the breast which staggers her, this last horror determines his ecstasy, and while my back is flailed by its cruel effects, my loins are flooded by the proofs of a delirium whose results are so dangerous.

 

24.

 

"We are going to bed," Clement finally says to me; "that has perhaps been rather too much for you, Therese, and certainly not enough for me; one never tires of this mania notwithstanding the fact it is a very pale image of what one should really like to do; ah, dear girl! you have no idea to what lengths this depravity leads us, you cannot imagine the drunkenness into which it plunges us, the violent commotion in the electrical fluid which results from the irritation produced by the suffering of the object that serves our passions; how one is needled by its agonies! The desire to increase them... 'tis, I know, the reef upon which the fantasy is doomed to wreck, but is this peril to be dreaded by him who cares not a damn for anything?"

Although Clement's mind was still in the grip of enthusiasm, I observed that his senses were much more calm, and by way of reply to what he had just said, I dared reproach him his tastes' depravation, and the manner in which this libertine justified them merits inclusion, it seems to me, amidst the confessions you wish to have from me.

"Without question the silliest thing in the world, my dear Therese," Clement said to me, "is to wish to dispute a man's tastes, to wish to contradict, thwart, discredit, condemn, or punish them if they do not conform either with the laws of the country he inhabits on with the prejudices of social convention. Why indeed! Will it never be understood that there is no variety of taste, however bizarre, however outlandish, however criminal it may be supposed, which does not derive directly from and depend upon the kind of organization we have individually received from Nature? That posed, I ask with what right one man will dare require another either to curb or get rid of his tastes or model them upon those of the social order? With what right will the law itself, which is created for man's happiness only, dare pursue him who cannot mend his ways, or who would succeed in altering his behavior only at the price of forgoing that happiness whose protection the law is obliged to guarantee him? Even were one to desire to change those tastes could one do so? Have we the power to remake ourselves? Can we become other than what we are? Would you demand the same thing from someone born a cripple? and is this inconformity of our tastes anything in the moral sphere but what the ill-made man's imperfection is in the physical?

"Shall we enter into details? Why, very well. The keen mind I recognize in you, Therese, will enable you to appreciate them. I believe you have been arrested by two irregularities you have remarked in us: you are astonished at the piquant sensation experienced by some of our friends where it is a question of matters commonly beheld as fetid or impure, and you are similarly surprised that our voluptuous faculties are susceptible of powerful excitation by actions which, in your view, bear none but the emblem of ferocity; let us analyze both these tastes and attempt, if 'tis possible, to convince you that there is nothing simpler or more normal in this world than the pleasures which are their result.

"Необычайно, вы заявляете, что все распалось, шумно и грязные способны произвести на наши чувства раздражение, необходимое ускорить их полный бред; но прежде чем позволить себе чтобы быть пораженным этим, было бы лучше понять, Тереза, что объекты не имеют для нас никакого значения, кроме того, что дает нам наше воображение им; поэтому очень возможно, принимая эту постоянную истину хорошо, что не только самый любопытный, но даже самый мерзкий и самые ужасные вещи могут очень сильно повлиять на нас. Человек воображение - это способность человеческого разума, после чего через Агентство чувств, объекты окрашены, посредством чего они изменены, и где, затем, идеи формируются, все по причине первоначального проблеск этих внешних объектов. Но это воображение само по себе Результатом специфической организации конкретного человека является наделенный, только принимает полученные объекты в такой-то манера и потом только создает идеи в соответствии с эффектами произведенный воздействием воспринятых объектов: позвольте мне дать вам сравнение чтобы помочь вам понять, что я разоблачаю. Тереза, разве ты не видел эти по-разному сформированные зеркала, некоторые из которых уменьшают объекты, другие из которых увеличивают их; некоторые отдают страшные образы вещи, некоторые украшают вещи; Вы теперь представляете, что каждый из эти типы зеркал обладают как творческим, так и объективным факультеты, они не будут давать совершенно разные портреты тот же человек, который стоит перед ними, и этот портрет не будет отличается благодаря тому, как каждое зеркало воспринималось объект? Если к двум способностям мы только что приписали зеркало, там были добавлены треть ощущения, не этот человек, виден им таким-то образом, быть источником такого рода чувствовать, что зеркало будет в состоянии, и действительно будет зачать за то, что зеркало было воспринято? Зеркало видит мужчину прекрасным, зеркало любит мужчину; другое зеркало видит человека как страшного и ненавидит его, и он всегда один и тот же существо, которое производит различные впечатления.

"Such is the human imagination, Therese; the same object is represented to it under as many forms as that imagination has various facets and moods, and according to the effect upon the imagination received from whatsoever be the object, the imagination is made to love or to hate it; if the perceived object's impact strikes it in an agreeable manner, the object is loved, preferred, even if this object has nothing really attractive about it; and if the object, though of a certain high value in the eyes of someone else, has only struck in a disagreeable manner the imagination we are discussing, hostility will be the result, because not one of our sentiments is formed save in reason of what various objects produce upon the imagination; these fundamentals once grasped, should not by any means be cause for astonishment that what distinctly pleases some is able to displease others, and, conversely, that the most extraordinary thing is able to find admirers.... The cripple also discovers certain mirrors which make him handsome.

"Now, if we admit that the senses' joy is always dependent upon the imagination, always regulated by the imagination, one must not be amazed by the numerous variations the imagination is apt to suggest during the pleasurable episode, by the infinite multitude of different tastes and passions the imagination's various extravagances will bring to light. Luxurious though these tastes may be, they are never intrinsically strange; there is no reason to find a mealtime eccentricity more or less extraordinary than a bed-room whim; and in the one and the other, it is not more astonishing to idolize what the common run of mankind holds detestable than it is to love something generally recognized as pleasant. To like what others like proves organic conformity, but demonstrates nothing in favor of the beloved object. Three-quarters of the universe may find the rose's scent delicious without that serving either as evidence upon which to condemn the remaining quarter which might find the smell offensive, or as proof that this odor is truly agreeable.

"If then in this world there exist persons whose tastes conflict with accepted prejudices, not only must one not be surprised by the fact, not only must one not scold these dissenters or punish them, but one must aid them, procure them contentment, remove obstacles which impede them, and afford them, if you wish to be just, all the means to satisfy themselves without risk; because they are no more responsible for having this curious taste than you are responsible for being live-spirited or dull-witted, prettily made or knock-kneed. It is in the mother's womb that there are fashioned the organs which must render us susceptible of such-and-such a fantasy; the first objects which we encounter, the first conversations we overhear determine the pattern; once tastes are formed nothing in the world can destroy them. Do what it will, education is incapable of altering the pattern, and he who has got to be a villain just as surely becomes a villain, the good education you give him notwithstanding; quite as he, however much he has lacked good example, flies unerringly toward virtue if his organs dispose him to the doing of good. Both have acted in accordance with their organic structure, in accordance with the impressions they have received from Nature, and the one is no more deserving of punishment than the other is of reward.

"Как ни странно, пока это просто вопрос мелочей, мы никогда не удивляемся существующим различиям среди вкусов; но пусть предмет принимает эротическую настойку, и послушайте, как распространяется слово! ходят слухи, женщины, всегда заботятся о защите своих прав - женщины, чьи непоследовательность делает их особенно склонными видеть врагов повсюду, женщины, я говорю, постоянно дрожат и трепет, чтобы что-то не было оторвано от них, и если, когда доставляя удовольствие, человек, к сожалению, применяет конфликт с поклонением женщине, вот! там у вас есть преступления, которые заслуживают петля. И какая несправедливость! Должно чувственное удовольствие оказать мужчине лучше, чем другие удовольствия жизни? Одним словом, наши писатели должны быть более сосредоточенным на храме поколения, не так ли? обязательно более наверняка пробудит наши желания, чем какая-то другая часть тела, наиболее противоречащего или наиболее удаленного от него? чем какое-то излучение тела или самый зловонный или самый отвратительный? По-моему, больше не должно появляться Удивительно видеть, как человек привносит необычность в свой развратник удовольствия, чем это должно показаться странным, чтобы увидеть его использовать необычный в любой другой жизненной деятельности. Еще раз, в любом случай, его особенность является результатом его органов: это его вина если то, что воздействует на вас, ничто для него, или если он только перемещен чем-то отталкивает тебя? Какой живой человек не станет сразу пересматривать свои вкусы, его привязанности, его сочинения и привести их в гармонию с Общая схема, что человек, а не продолжать урод, не будет предпочитаешь быть как все, было ли в его силах сделать это? Это самая варварская и самая глупая непереносимость желания летать на такое мужское горло; он больше не виноват в обществе, независимо о том, что может быть его расточительностью, чем, как я только что сказал, Человек, который ослеп и хромает в мире. И это было бы довольно настолько несправедливо, чтобы наказать или высмеять последнего, чтобы обидеть или оскорбить Другие. Человек, наделенный необычными вкусами, болен; если хочешь, он как женщина, подверженная истерическим парам. Есть идея наказать такого человека, когда-либо приходившего нам в голову? Давайте будем одинаково справедливы когда имеешь дело с человеком, чьи капризы нас пугают; отлично как больному мужчине или женщине, страдающей от паров, он заслуживает сочувствия, а не вины; это моральное извинение за лица, которых мы обсуждаем; физическое объяснение будет без сомнения можно найти так же легко, и когда изучение анатомии достигает совершенство они без труда смогут продемонстрировать отношение человеческой конституции к вкусам, которые оно влияет. Ах, вы педанты, палачи, под ключ, законодатели, вы сбривание, что вы будете делать, когда мы туда приедем? что это стать из ваших законов, вашей этики, вашей религии, вашей виселицы, ваши боги, ваши небеса и ваш ад, когда это будет доказано что такой поток жидкостей, это разнообразие волокон, что степень остроту в крови или в животном духе достаточно, чтобы сделать человека объектом твоих пожертвований и твоих взятий? Мы Продолжить. Жестокие вкусы удивляют вас.

"Какова цель человека, который ищет свою радость? это не дать его чувства все раздражение, которому они подвержены порядок, таким образом, лучше и теплее, чтобы достичь конечной кризис ... драгоценный кризис, который характеризует наслаждение как хорошо или плохо, в зависимости от большей или меньшей активности, которая происходит во время кризиса? Ну, один не виновен в несостоятельном софистика, когда кто-то смеет утверждать, что это необходимо, чтобы улучшите это, чтобы это было разделено с женщиной? Разве это не ясно Достаточно того, что женщина не может ничего поделиться с нами, не принимая что-то от нас? и что все, что она убирает, должно обязательно иметь ее за наш счет? И что же это за необходимость, я спросите, чтобы женщина получала удовольствие, когда мы веселились? в эта договоренность есть какие-либо чувства, но гордость, которая может быть польщен? и разве нельзя смаковать это гордое чувство в гораздо более пикантным образом, когда, наоборот, кто-то резко ограничивает это женщина отказаться от своего стремления к удовольствию и посвятить себя чтобы ты сам чувствовал это? Не тирании льстит гордость за куда более живой путь, чем благотворительность? Одним словом, не он кто навязывает гораздо более уверенного мастера, чем тот, кто разделяет? Но как мог ли он когда-нибудь прийти в голову разумного человека, что деликатес какой-либо ценности во время удовольствия? «Это абсурд, поддерживать это необходимо в такое время; это никогда не добавляет ничего к удовольствию чувства, почему, я утверждаю, что это отвлекает от них. Любить и наслаждаться - это две разные вещи: доказательство того, что каждый любит каждый день без удовольствия, и что еще чаще один наслаждается без любви. Что-нибудь в порядке рассмотрения для женщина, шевелящаяся в бульоне, должна разбавить свою силу и ухудшать его вкус для мужчины; до тех пор, пока последний проводит свое время доставляя удовольствие, он, конечно, сам не делает никакого наслаждения, или его наслаждение просто интеллектуальное, то есть химерическое и намного уступает чувственным удовольствиям. Нет, Тереза, нет, я не перестану повторяя это, нет абсолютно никакой необходимости в том, чтобы острый, удовольствие должно быть разделено; и для того, чтобы этот вид удовольствие может быть оказано пикантным до предела, это на напротив, очень важно, чтобы человек никогда не получал удовольствие, кроме за счет женщины, которую он у нее забирает (без учета для ощущения, которое она может испытать таким образом) все, что может каким-либо образом улучшить или увеличить сладострастные упражнения, которые он хочет с удовольствием, и это без малейшего беспокойства о том, что может быть последствия всего этого на женщину, для озабоченности тем, Сортировка будет надоедать ему; он либо хочет, чтобы женщина наслаждайся, и на этом его радости заканчиваются; или он страхи, чтобы она не пострадала, и он швыряется в замешательство, все остановлен. Если эгоизм является основной заповедью Природы, он безусловно, больше всего во время наших сладких удовольствий, что это Небесная Мать желает, чтобы мы были абсолютно полностью под ее властью; почему это очень маленькое зло, не так ли, что в интересах увеличение развратных удовольствий человека он получил либо пренебрегать или расстраивать женщину; ибо если это ее расстроило удовольствие заставляет его приобретать то, что потеряно для объекта, который служит ему не влияет на него мудро, экономить выгодно: это должно быть ему безразлично, счастлив ли этот предмет или несчастный, если это будет восхитительно для него; по правде говоря, нет отношение вообще между этим объектом и им самим. Он, следовательно, будет дурак беспокоиться о ощущениях объекта и забыть его своя; он был бы совершенно безумен, если бы, чтобы изменить эти Чувства, чуждые ему, он должен был отказаться от улучшения его. Это очень установлено, если, к сожалению, рассматриваемый человек, организованный таким образом, он не может быть взволнован, кроме как производя болевые ощущения в работающем объекте, вы признаете, что он вынуждены безжалостно идти на работу, так как смысл всего этого в том, чтобы иметь наилучшее возможное время, последствия для объекта полностью исключен из рассмотрения .... Вернемся к проблема; давайте продолжим упорядоченно.

"Поэтому изолированное наслаждение имеет свои прелести, поэтому оно может иметь их больше, чем все другие виды; почему я, если бы это было не так, как должны ли престарелые и многие деформированные или неполноценные люди веселиться? ибо они прекрасно знают, что их не любят и милый; совершенно уверен, что невозможно поделиться тем, что они опыт, является ли их радость менее сильной в этом отношении? Делать они желают даже иллюзии? Вести себя с полным эгоизмом в их беспорядки, вы будете наблюдать их в поисках удовольствия, вы увидите они жертвуют всем, чтобы получить это, и в объекте они ставят использовать никогда, кроме пассивных свойств. Следовательно, нет мудро необходимо давать удовольствия, чтобы их получать; счастлив или несчастная ситуация жертвы нашего разврата, следовательно, абсолютно как единое с точки зрения наших чувств, есть никогда не возникает вопроса о состоянии, в котором может находиться его сердце или разум; это не имеет значения, объект может быть доволен тем, что вы делаете для это, объект может страдать, он может любить или ненавидеть вас: все эти соображения аннулируются сразу же, это только вопрос ваше ощущение. Я допускаю, что женщины могут создавать противоположные теории, но женщины, которые являются ничем иным, как машинами, созданными для сладострастия, кто должен быть только целью похоти, не заслуживает доверия власти всякий раз, когда нужно построить подлинную доктрину на такого рода удовольствия. Есть ли один разумный человек, который Хотите иметь шлюху от его радости? И, тем не менее, есть ли не миллионы людей, которые очень развлекаются с этими существа? Ну, у вас есть много людей, убежденных в что я призываю, кто без колебаний применяет это на практике, и кто презирать тех, кто использует хорошие принципы, чтобы узаконить свои поступки, тех, смешные дураки, мир переполнен ими, которые иди и иди, кто делает то и то, кто ест, кто переваривает, никогда ощущая вещь.

"Having proven that solitary pleasures are as delicious as any others and much more likely to delight, it becomes perfectly clear that this enjoyment, taken in independence of the object we employ, is not merely of a nature very remote from what could be pleasurable to that object, but is even found to be inimical to that object's pleasure: what is more, it may become an imposed suffering, a vexation, or a torture, and the only thing that results from this abuse is a very certain increase of pleasure for the despot who does the tormenting or vexing; let us attempt to demonstrate this.

"Сладострастные эмоции - это не что иное, как вибрация в нашей душе потрясениями, которые воспалило воображение воспоминание о смазывающем объекте, регистрируется в наших чувствах, либо через присутствие этого объекта, или еще лучше этим объект подвергается тому особому виду раздражения, которое наиболее глубоко нас волнует; Таким образом, наш сладострастный транспорт - это неописуемая судорожная игла, которая сводит нас с ума, которая поднимает мы на высшем уровне счастья, к которому человек может прийти Ä никогда не зажигается, за исключением двух причин: либо восприятия в объект, который мы используем настоящую или воображаемую красоту, красоту, в которой мы восхищаемся больше всего, или при виде этого объекта, подвергающегося сильнейшее возможное ощущение; теперь нет более живой сенсации чем боль; его впечатления достоверны и надежны, они никогда не обманывайте, как те, которые женщины удовольствия постоянно притворяются и почти никогда не испытывают; и, кроме того, сколько уверенность в себе, молодость, энергичность, здоровье не нужны для того, чтобы быть уверен, что производит это сомнительное и вряд ли очень удовлетворительное впечатление удовольствия в женщине. Чтобы произвести болезненное впечатление, на напротив, вообще не требует никаких добродетелей: чем больше у человека недостатков есть, чем он старше, тем менее привлекательный, тем громче его успех. Что касается цели, это будет гораздо больше безусловно, достигнут, поскольку мы устанавливаем тот факт, что никогда Я хочу сказать, что лучше никогда не раздражать чувств, чем когда было произведено максимально возможное впечатление на занятом объекте, независимо от того, какие устройства; следовательно, тот, кто будет вызывать самые бурные впечатления от рождения у женщины, он кто наиболее тщательно потрясет весь кадр этой женщины, очень решительно удастся добыть себе самое тяжелое доза сладострастия, потому что шок, вызванный нами впечатления других, которые, в свою очередь, необходимы шок по нашему впечатлению о тех других, обязательно будет больше энергичнее, если впечатление, которое получают эти другие, будет болезненным, чем если впечатление, которое они получают, будет сладким и мягким; и из этого следует, что сладострастный эгоист, убежденный в своих удовольствиях только, если они целы, навязывают, когда он это в его силах сделать, сильнейшая доза боли на занятый объект, полностью уверенный в том, что путем сладострастия удовольствие, которое он извлекает, будет его только благодаря очень живой впечатление, которое он произвел."

"Oh, Father," I said to Clement, "these doctrines are dreadful, they lead to the cultivation of cruel tastes, horrible tastes."

"Why, what does it matter?" demanded the barbarian; "and, once again, have we any control over our tastes? Must we not yield to the dominion of those Nature has inserted in us as when before the tempest's force the proud oak bends its head? Were Nature offended by these proclivities, she would not have inspired them in us; that we can receive from her hands a sentiment such as would outrage her is impossible, and, extremely certain of this, we can give ourselves up to our passions, whatever their sort and of whatever their violence, wholly sure that all the discomfitures their shock may occasion are naught but the designs of Nature, of whom we are the involuntary instruments. And what to us are these passions' consequences? When one wishes to delight in any action whatsoever, there is never any question of consequences."

"I am not speaking to you of consequences," I put in abruptly, "but of the thing itself; if indeed you are the stronger and if through atrocious principles of cruelty you love to take your pleasure only by means of causing suffering with the intention of augmenting your sensations, you will gradually come to the point of producing them with such a degree of violence that you will certainly risk killing the employed object."

"So be it; that is to say that, by means of tastes given me by Nature, I shall have carried out the intentions of Nature who, never affecting her creations save through destructions, never inspires the thought of the latter in me save when she is in need of the former; that is to say that from an oblong portion of matter I shall have formed three or four thousand round or square ones. Oh Therese, is there any crime here? Is this the name with which to designate what serves Nature? Is it in man's power to commit crimes? And when, preferring his own happiness to that of others, he overthrows or destroys whatever he finds in his path, has he done anything but serve Nature whose primary and most imperious inspirations enjoin him to pursue his happiness at no matter whose expense? The doctrine of brotherly love is a fiction we owe to Christianity and not to Nature; the exponent of the Nazarene's cult, tormented, wretched and consequently in an enfeebled state which prompted him to cry out for tolerance and compassion, had no choice but to allege this fabulous relationship between one person and another; by gaining acceptance for the notion he was able to save his life. But the philosopher does not acknowledge these gigantic rapports; to his consideration, he is alone in the universe, he judges everything subjectively, he only is of importance. If he is thoughtful of or caresses another for one instant, it is never but in strait connection with what profit he thinks to draw from the business; when he is no longer in need of others, when he can forcefully assert his empire, he then abjures forever those pretty humanitarian doctrines of doing good deeds to which he only submitted himself for reasons of policy; he no longer fears to be selfish, to reduce everyone about him, and he sates his appetites without inquiring to know what his enjoyments may cost others, and without remorse."

"But the man you describe is a monster."

"The man I describe is in tune with Nature."

"He is a savage beast."

"Why, is not the tiger or the leopard, of whom this man is, if you wish, a replica, like man created by Nature and created to prosecute Nature's intentions? The wolf who devours the lamb accomplishes what this common mother designs, just as does the malefactor who destroys the object of his revenge or his lubricity."

"Oh, Father, say what you will, I shall never accept this destructive lubricity."

"Because you are afraid of becoming its object Ä there you have it: egoism. Let's exchange our roles and you will fancy it very nicely. Ask the lamb, and you will find he does not understand why the wolf is allowed to devour him; ask the wolf what the lamb is for: to feed me, he will reply. Wolves which batten upon lambs, lambs consumed by wolves, the strong who immolate the weak, the weak victims of the strong: there you have Nature, there you have her intentions, there you have her scheme: a perpetual action and reaction, a host of vices, a host of virtues, in one word, a perfect equilibrium resulting from the equality of good and evil on earth; the equilibrium essential to the maintenance of the stars, of vegetation and, lacking which, everything would be instantly in ruins. O Therese, mightily astonished she would be, this Nature, were she to be able to converse with us for a moment and were we to tell her that these crimes which serve her, these atrocities she demands and inspires in us are punished by laws they assure us are made in imitation of hers. 'Idiots' she would reply to us, 'sleep, eat, and fearlessly commit whatever crimes you like whenever you like: every one of those alleged infamies pleases me, and I would have them all, since it is I who inspire them in you. It is within your province to regulate what annoys me and what delights, indeed! be advised that there is nothing in you which is not my own, nothing I did not place in you for reasons it is not fitting you be acquainted with; know that the most abominable of your deeds is, like the most virtuous of some other, but one of the manners of serving me. So do not restrain yourself, flout your laws, a fig for your social conventions and your Gods; listen to me and to none other, and believe that if there exists a crime to be committed against me it is the resistance you oppose, in the forms of stubbornness or casuistries, to what I inspire in you."'

"Oh, Just Heaven!" I cried, "you make me shudder! Were there no crimes against Nature, whence would come that insurmountable loathing we experience for certain misdeeds?"

"That loathing is not dictated by Nature," the villain replied with feeling, "its one source is in the total lack of habit; does not the same hold true for certain foods? Although they are excellent, is not our repugnance merely caused by our being unaccustomed to them? would you dare say, upon the basis of your prejudices or ignorance, that they are good or bad? If we make the effort, we will soon become convinced and will find they suit our palate; we have a hostility toward medicaments, do we not, although they are salutary; in the same fashion, let us accustom ourselves to evil and it will not be long before we find it charming; this momentary revulsion is certainly a shrewdness, a kind of coquetry on the part of Nature, rather than a warning that the thing outrages her: thus she prepares the pleasures of our triumph; she even manages thus to augment those of the deed itself: better still, Therese, better still: the more the deed seems appalling to us, the more it is in contradiction with our manners and customs, the more it runs headlong against restraints and shatters them, the more it conflicts with social conventions and affronts them, the more it clashes with what we mistake for Nature's laws, then the more, on the contrary, it is useful to this same Nature. It is never but by way of crimes that she regains possession of the rights Virtue incessantly steals away from her. If the crime is slight, if it is at no great variance with Virtue, its weight will be less in re- establishing the balance indispensable to Nature; but the more capital the crime, the more deadly, the more it dresses the scales and the better it offsets the influence of Virtue which, without this, would destroy everything. Let him then cease to be in a fright, he who meditates a crime or he who has just committed one: the vaster his crime, the better it will serve Nature."

 

25.

 

These frightful theories soon led me to think of Omphale's doubts upon the manner in which we left the terrible house we were in. And it was then I conceived the plans you will see me execute in the sequel. However, to complete my enlightenment I could not prevent myself from putting yet a few more questions to Father Clement.

"But surely," I said, "you do not keep your passions' unhappy victims forever; you surely send them away when you are wearied of them?"

"Certainly, Therese," the monk replied; "you only entered this establishment in order to leave it when the four of us agree to grant your retirement. Which will most certainly be granted."

"But do you not fear," I continued, "lest the younger and less discreet girls sometimes go and reveal what is done here?"

"'Tis impossible."

"Impossible ?"

"Absolutely."

"Could you explain..."

"No, that's our secret, but I can assure you of this much: that whether you are discreet or indiscreet, you will find it perfectly impossible ever to say a word about what is done here when you are here no longer. And thus you see, Therese, I recommend no discretion to you, just as my own desires are governed by no restraining policy...."

And, having utter'd these words, the monk fell asleep. From that moment onward, I could no longer avoid realizing that the most violent measures were used with those unhappy ones of us who were retrenched and that this terrible security they boasted of was only the fruit of our death. I was only the more confirmed in my resolve; we will soon see its effect.

As soon as Clement was asleep, Armande came near to me.

"He will awake shortly," she said; "he will behave like a madman: Nature only puts his senses to sleep in order to give them, after a little rest, a much greater energy; one more scene and we will have peace until tomorrow."

"But you," I said to my companion, "aren't you going to sleep a little while ?"

"How can I ?" Armande replied, "when, were I not to remain awake and standing by his side, and were my negligence to be perceived, he would be the man to stab me to death."

"O Heaven!" I sighed, "why! even as he sleeps the villain would that those around him remain in a state of suffering !"

"Yes," my companion responded, "it is the very barbarity of the idea which procures the furious awakening you are going to witness; upon this he is like unto those perverse writers whose corruption is so dangerous, so active, that their single aim is, by causing their appalling doctrines to be printed, to immortalize the sum of their crimes after their own lives are at an end; they themselves can do no more, but their accursed writings will instigate the commission of crimes, and they carry this sweet idea with them to their graves: it comforts them for the obligation, enjoined by death, to relinquish the doing of evil."

"The monsters!" I cried....

Armande, who was a very gentle creature, kissed me as she shed a few tears, then went back to pacing about the roue's bed.

Two hours passed and then the monk did indeed awake in a prodigious agitation and seized me with such force I thought he was going to strangle me; his respiration was quick and labored, his eyes glittered, he uttered incoherent words which were exclusively blasphemous or libertine expressions; he summoned Armande, called for whips, and started in again with his flogging of us both, but in a yet more vigorous manner than before having gone to sleep. It seemed as if he wished to end matters with me; shrill cries burst from his mouth; to abridge my sufferings, Armande excited him violently, he lost his head entirely, and finally made rigid by the most violent sensations, the monster lost both his ardor and his desires together with smoking floods of semen.

Nothing transpired during the rest of the night; upon getting up, the monk was content to touch and examine each of us; and as he was going to say Mass, we returned to the seraglio. The superintendent could not be prevented from desiring me in. the inflamed state she swore I must be in; exhausted I indeed was and, thus weakened, how could I defend myself ? She did all she wished, enough to convince me that even a woman, in such a school, soon losing all the delicacy and restraint native to her sex, could only, after those tyrants' example, become obscene and cruel.

Two nights later, I slept with Jerome; I will not describe his horrors to you; they were still more terrifying. What an academy, great God! by week's end I had finally made the circuit, and then Omphale asked me whether it were not true that of them all, Clement was the one about whom I had the most to complain.

"Alas!" was my response, "in the midst of a crowd of horrors and messes of filth which now disgust and now revolt, it is very difficult to pronounce upon these villains' individual odiousness; I am mortally weary of them all and would that I were gone from here, whatever be the fate that awaits me."

"It might be possible that you will soon be satisfied," my companion answered; "we are nearing the period of the festival: this circumstance rarely takes place without bringing them victims; they either seduce girls by means of the confessional, or, if they can, they cause them to disappear: which means so many new recruits, each of whom always supposes a retrenchment."

Знаменитый праздник прибыл ... вы сможете поверить, Мадам, в каких чудовищных махинациях виноваты монахи во время это событие! Они воображали, что видимое чудо удвоит блеск их репутации; и поэтому они одели Флоретт, младшая из девушек, во всех нарядах и украшениях Богородицы; по средствами скрытых струн они привязали ее к стене нишу и приказал ей поднять руки очень внезапно и с угрызение совести к небу одновременно и воин вознесся. Как маленькое существо находилось под угрозой самого жестокого наказания, если она должны были сказать одно слово или неумело управлять в своей роли, она несла это на удивление хорошо, и мошенники пользовались всем успехом, который возможно, можно было ожидать. Люди громко плакали чудо, оставив богатые жертвы Богородице, и пошел домой больше убедился, чем когда-либо в эффективности небесной Матери Милости. Чтобы увеличить свою нечестивость, наши развратники хотели чтобы Флоретта появилась на оргиях в тот вечер, одетая в тот же костюм, который привлек так много уважения, и каждый подстрекал его одиозные желания представить ее, в этом облике, нерегулярность его капризов. Возбужденный этим первоначальным преступлением, кощунственные идут значительно дальше: у них есть ребенок раздетые, они лежат на животе на большом столе; они зажигают свечи, они помещают образ нашего Спасителя прямо на спине маленькой девочки и на ее ягодицах они смеют завершить самые грозные из наших загадок. Я упала в обморок это ужасное зрелище, «невозможно нести зрение. Северино, видя меня без сознания, говорит, что, чтобы привести меня в пятки, я должен служить алтарем в мою очередь. Я схвачен; Я нахожусь где Флоретт лгала; жертва завершена, и хозяин ... этот священный символ нашей августовской религии ... Северино догоняет его и вонзает его глубоко в непристойный язык его содомиста удовольствия ... давит клятвами и оскорблениями ... позорно ведет его дальше с усиленными ударами его чудовищного дротика и когда он богохульствует, изливается на само Тело нашего Спасителя, нечистые потоки его смазывающей ливни ....

Я был бесчувственным, когда они вытащили меня из его рук; Я должен был быть перенесли в мою комнату, где в течение недели я проливал непрерывные слезы отвратительное преступление, за которое, против моей воли, я был нанят. Память все еще грызет мою душу, я никогда не вспоминаю об этом сцена без содрогания .... Во мне Религия - это эффект настроения; все, что оскорбляет или оскорбляет это делает мое сердце кровоточить.

Конец месяца был близок, когда однажды утром девять Северино вошли в нашу комнату; он выглядел очень возбужденным; определенный сумасшедший взгляд витал в его глазах; он осматривает нас, один за другим другой, ставит нас в его заветное отношение, и особенно задерживается над омфалом; несколько минут он стоит, обдумывая ее в позе она приняла, он возбуждает себя, бормочет тупо, тайно, целует то, что ему предлагают, позволяет каждому увидеть он в состоянии совершить и ничего не совершает; затем он выпрямляется, бросает на нее взгляды, наполненные яростью и злоба; затем, размахивая ногой, он изо всех сил пинает она в животе, она откатывается назад и падает в шести ярдах.

"The company is retrenching you, whore," he says, "we are tired of you, be ready by this afternoon. I will come to fetch you myself." And he leaves.

When he is gone Omphale gets up and, weeping, casts herself into my arms.

"Ah!" she says, "by the infamy, by the cruelty of the preliminaries... can you still blind yourself as to what follows? Great God! what is to become of me?"

"Be easy," I say to the miserable girl, "I have made up my mind about everything; I only await the opportunity; it may perhaps present itself sooner than you think; I will divulge these horrors; if it is true the measures they take are as cruel as we have reason to believe, strive to obtain some delays, postpone it, and I will wrest you from their clutches."

In the event Omphale were to be released, she swore in the same way to aid me, and both of us fell to weeping. The day passed, nothing happened during it; at five o'clock Severino returned.

"Well," he asked Omphale, "are you ready?"

"Yes, Father," she answered between sobs, "permit me to embrace my friends."

" 'Tis useless," replied the monk; "we have no time for lachrymose scenes; they are waiting for us; come." Then she asked whether she were obliged to take her belongings with her.

"No," said the superior; "does not everything belong to the house? You have no further need of any of it"; then, checking himself, as might one who has said too much:

"Those old clothes have become useless; you will have some cut to fit your size, they will be more becoming to you; be content to take along only what you are wearing."

I asked the monk whether I might be allowed to accompany Omphale to the door of the house; his reply was a glance that made me recoil in terror.... Omphale goes out, she turns toward us eyes filled with uneasiness and tears, and the minute she is gone I fling myself down upon the bed, desperate.

 

26.

 

Привыкшие к этим явлениям или не замечая их значения, мой компаньоны были менее затронуты уходом Омфала, чем я; начальник вернулся через час, чтобы увести на ужин девушек кого я был один - нам было всего четыре: девушка двенадцати, она из шестнадцать, ей двадцать три, и мне. Все прошло более или менее как и в другие дни; Я только заметил, что Девушки Дозора были не под рукой, что монахи часто шептали друг другу в уши, что они много пили, что они жестоко ограничились возбуждающих желаний они ни разу не исполнили, и именно они нас послали в ранний час, не оставляя никого из нас для себя кровати .... Я вывел то, что я мог из того, что я наблюдал, потому что под В таких обстоятельствах нужно внимательно следить за всем, но что это доказательство предвещало? Ах, таково было мое недоумение, что нет ясного идея пришла мне в голову, но не сразу другим; вспомнив слова Клемента, я почувствовал, что все бояться ... конечно; но потом, надеюсь ... что предательская надежда, которая нас утешает, которая ослепляет нас и которая, таким образом, делает нас почти так же плохо, как хорошо ... надежда, наконец, вспыхнула, чтобы успокоить я .... Такое количество ужасов было настолько чуждо мне, что я был просто не в состоянии понять их. В этом ужасном состоянии растерянность, я ложусь в постель; теперь меня уговаривали Офхейл бы не не сдержать ее слова; и в следующий момент я убедился жестокие устройства, которые они использовали бы против нее, лишили бы ее всего сила, чтобы помочь нам, и это было мое окончательное мнение, когда я увидел конец Приходите на третий день, ничего не услышав.

После четвертого я снова оказался призванным к ужину; Компания была многочисленной и избранной: восемь самых красивых женщин были там в тот вечер мне заплатили честь быть включенным среди них; Девушки Дозора тоже присутствовали. Мы сразу вошли мы увидели нашего нового компаньона.

"Here is the young lady the corporation has destined to replace Omphale, Mesdemoiselles," said Severino.

And as the words escaped his lips he tore away the mantlets and lawn which covered the girl's bust, and we beheld a maiden of fifteen, with the most agreeable and delicate face: she raised her lovely eyes and graciously regarded each of us; those eyes were still moist with tears, but they contained the liveliest expression; her figure was supple and light, her skin of a dazzling whiteness, she had the world's most beautiful hair, and there was something so seductive about the whole that it was impossible not to feel oneself automatically drawn to her. Her name was Octavie; we were soon informed she was a girl of the highest quality, born in Paris, and had just emerged from a convent in order to wed the Comte de * * *: she had been kidnaped while en route in the company of two governesses and three lackeys; she did not know what had become of her retinue; it had been toward nightfall and she alone had been taken; after having been blindfolded, she had been brought to where we were and it had not been possible to know more of the matter.

As yet no one had spoken a word to her. Our libertine quartet, confronted by so much charm, knew an instant of ecstasy; they had only the strength to admire her. Beauty's dominion commands respect; despite his heartlessness, the most corrupt villain must bow before it or else suffer the stings of an obscure remorse; but monsters of the breed with which we had to cope do not long languish under such restraints.

"Come, pretty child," quoth the superior, impudently drawing her toward the chair in which he was settled, "come hither and let's have a look to see whether the rest of your charms match those Nature has so profusely distributed in your countenance."

And as the lovely girl was sore troubled, as she flushed crimson and strove to fend him off, Severino grasped her rudely round the waist.

"Understand, my artless one," he said, "understand that what I want to tell you is simply this: get undressed. Strip. Instantly."

And thereupon the libertine slid one hand beneath her skirts while he grasped her with the other. Clement approached, he raised Octavie's clothes to above her waist and by this maneuver exposed the softest, the most appetizing features it is possible anywhere to find; Severino touches, perceives nothing, bends to scrutinize more narrowly, and all four agree they have never seen anything as beautiful. However, the modest Octavie, little accustomed to usage of this sort, gushes tears, and struggles.

"Undress, undress," cries Antonin, "we can't see a thing this way."

He assists Severino and in a trice we have displayed to us all the maiden's unadorned charms. Never, without any doubt, was there a fairer skin, never were there more happily modeled forms.... God! the crime of it!... So many beauties, such chaste freshness, so much innocence and daintiness Ä all to become prey to these barbarians! Covered with shame, Octavie knows not where to fly to hide her charms, she finds naught but hungering eyes everywhere about, nothing but brutal hands which sully those treasures; the circle closes around her, and, as did I, she rushes hither and thither; the savage Antonin lacks the strength to resist; a cruel attack determines the homage, and the incense smokes at the goddess' feet. Jerome compares her to our young colleague of sixteen, doubtless the seraglio's prettiest; he places the two altars of his devotion one next to the other.

"Ha! what whiteness! what grace!" says he as he fingers Octavie, "but what gentility and freshness may be discerned in this other one: indeed," continues the monk all afire, "I am uncertain"; then imprinting his mouth upon the charms his eyes behold, "Octavie," he cries, "to you the apple, it belongs to none but you, give me the precious fruit of this tree my heart adores.... Ah, yes! yes, one of you, give it me, and I will forever assure beauty's prize to who serves me sooner."

Severino observes the time has come to meditate on more serious matters; absolutely in no condition to be kept waiting, he lays hands upon the unlucky child, places her as he desires her to be; not yet being able to have full confidence in Octavie's aid, he calls for Clement to lend him a hand. Octavie weeps and weeps unheeded; fire gleams in the impudicious monk's glance; master of the terrain, one might say he casts about a roving eye only to consider the avenues whereby he may launch the fiercest assault; no ruses, no preparations are employed; will he be able to gather these so charming roses? will he be able to battle past the thorns? Whatever the enormous disproportion between the conquest and the assailant, the latter is not the less in a sweat to give fight; a piercing cry announces victory, but nothing mollifies the enemy's chilly heart; the more the captive implores mercy, the less quarter is granted her, the more vigorously she is pressed; the ill-starred one fences in vain: she is soon transpierced.

"Never was laurel with greater difficulty won," says Severino, retreating, "I thought indeed that for the first time in my life I would fall before the gate... ah! 'twas never so narrow, that way, nor so hot; 'tis the God's own Ganymede."

"I had better bring her round to the sex you have just soiled," cries Antonin, seizing Octavie where she is, and not wishing to let her stand up; "there's more than one breach to a rampart," says he, and proudly, boldly marching up, he carries the day and is within the sanctuary in no time at all. Further screams are heard.

"Praise be to God," quoth the indecent man, "I thought I was alone; and would have doubted of my success without a groan or two from the victim; but my triumph is sealed. Do you observe? Blood and tears."

"In truth," says Clement, who steps up with whip in hand, "I'll not disturb her sweet posture either, it is too favorable to my desires." Jerome's Girl of the Watch and the twenty-year-old girl hold Octavie: Clement considers, fingers; terrified, the little girl beseeches him, and is not listened to.

"Ah, my friends!" says the exalted monk, "how are we to avoid flogging a schoolgirl who exhibits an ass of such splendor !"

The air immediately resounds to the whistle of lashes and the thud of stripes sinking into lovely flesh; Octavie's screams mingle with the sounds of leather, the monk's curses reply: what a scene for these libertines surrendering themselves to a thousand obscenities in the midst of us all I They applaud him, they cheer him on; however, Octavie's skin changes color, the brightest tints incarnadine join the lily sparkle; but what might perhaps divert Love for an instant, were moderation to have direction of the sacrifice, becomes, thanks to severity, a frightful crime against Love's laws; nothing stops or slows the perfidious monk, the more the young student complains, the more the professor's harshness explodes; from the back to the knee, everything is treated in the same way, and it is at last upon his barbaric pleasures' blood-drenched vestiges the savage quenches his flames.

"I shall be less impolite, I think," says Jerome, laying hands upon the lovely thing and adjusting himself between her coral lips; "where is the temple where I would sacrifice? Why, in this enchanting mouth...."

Я замолкаю ... - Это нечистая рептилия, увядающая розу - мой фигура речи связывает все это.

Остальная часть вечера была бы похожа на все остальные не был для красоты и трогательного возраста этой молодой девы кто более чем обычно разжигал этих злодеев и заставил их умножить их позоры; это было сытость, а не сочувствие который отправил несчастного ребенка обратно в ее комнату и дал ей, на несколько часов минимум, покой и тишина ей нужны.

Мне действительно хотелось бы быть в состоянии утешить ее, что первую ночь, но, обязан провести его с Северино, вполне может был ли я наоборот, кто больше нуждался в помощи, потому что я имел несчастье, нет, не угодить, слово не будет подходит, нет, но самым живым образом, чтобы возбудить этого содомита печально известные страсти; в этот период он желал меня почти каждую ночь; будучи исчерпан на этом конкретном, он провел некоторые исследования; несомненно, боится страшного меча, с которым он был наделенный не причинит мне достаточного количества боли, он воображал, на этот раз он может перфорировать меня одной из тех статей мебель обычно встречается в женских монастырях, что приличие запрещает мне наименование и которое имело непомерную толщину; здесь один был обязан быть готовым ко всему. Он сам сделал оружие проникнуть в его любимый храм; благодаря мощным ударам это было везут очень глубоко; Я кричал; монах был удивлен, после нескольких проходя назад и вперед, он внезапно освободил инструмент и окунулся в пропасть, которую он только что вырыл ... что прихоть! Разве это не является положительным противоречием всему, что мужчины способен желать! Но кто может определить дух свободы? Для долгое время мы осознавали, что это загадка природы; у нее есть еще не произносится волшебное слово.

Утром, чувствуя себя немного обновленным, он хотел попробовать другая пытка: он произвел гораздо более массовую машину: этот был полый и оснащен насосом высокого давления, который невероятно мощный поток воды через отверстие, которое дало струя окружность более трех дюймов; огромный Сам инструмент был длиной девять дюймов и двенадцатью. Северино загрузил его горячей водой и приготовил похоронить внешний интерфейс; в ужасе от такого проекта я бросаюсь на колени просить пощады, но он в одной из этих проклятых ситуаций там, где не слышно жалости, где подавляются куда более красноречивые страсти это и заменяет часто чрезвычайно опасную жестокость. Монах угрожает мне всей своей яростью, если я не соглашусь; Мне пришлось подчиниться. Вероломная машина проникает до отметки две трети и разрыв, который он вызывает в сочетании с его сильной жарой, вот-вот лишить меня возможности использовать свои чувства; между тем, начальник, поливая непрерывный поток инвектив на части, которые он растлит, возбуждает себя своим последователем; после пятнадцати минут потертости, которая раздирает меня, он отпускает весну, литр почти кипящей воды выстрелил в последние глубины моего матка ... я падаю в обморок. Северино был в экстазе ... он был в бред как минимум равный моей агонии.

"Why," said the traitor, "that's nothing at all. When I recover my wits, we'll treat those charms much more harshly... a salad of thorns, by Jesus! well peppered, a copious admixture of vinegar, all that tamped in with the point of a knife, that's what they need to buck them up; the next mistake you make, I condemn you to the treatment," said the villain while he continued to handle the object of his worship; but two or three homages after the preceeding night's debauches had near worked him to death, and I was sent packing.

Upon returning to my chamber I found my new companion in tears; I did what I could to soothe her, but it is not easy to adjust to so frightful a change of situation; this girl had, furthermore, a great fund of religious feeling, of virtue, and of sensitivity; owing to it, her state only appeared to her the more terrible. Omphale had been right when she told me seniority in no way influenced retirement; that, simply by the monks' caprice, or by their fear of ulterior inquiries, one could undergo dismissal at the end of a week as easily as at the end of twenty years. Octavie had not been with us four months when Jerome came to announce her departure; although 'twas he who had most enjoyed her during her sojourn at the monastery, he who had seemed to cherish her and seek her more than any other, the poor child left, making us the same promises Omphale had given; she kept them just as poorly.

From that moment on, my every thought was bent upon the plan I had been devising since Omphale's departure; determined to do everything possible to escape from this den of savages, nothing that might help me succeed held any terrors for me. What was there to dread by putting my scheme into execution? Death. And were I to remain, of what could I be certain? Of death. And successful flight would save me; there could be no hesitation for there was no alternative; but it were necessary that, before I launched my enterprise, fatal examples of vice rewarded be yet again reproduced before my eyes; it was inscribed in the great book of fate, in that obscure tome whereof no mortal has intelligence, 'twas set down there, I say, that upon all those who had tormented me, humiliated me, bound me in iron chains, there were to be heaped unceasing bounties and rewards for what they had done with regard to me, as if Providence had assumed the task of demonstrating to me the inutility of virtue.... Baleful lessons which however did not correct me, no, I wavered not; lessons which, should I once again escape from the blade poised above my head, will not prevent me from forever remaining the slave of my heart's Divinity.

 

27.

 

One morning, quite unexpectedly, Antonin appeared in our chamber and announced that the Reverend Father Severino, allied to the Pope and his protege, had just been named General of the Benedictine Order by His Holiness. The next day that monk did in effect depart, without taking his leave of us; 'twas said another was expected to replace him, and he would be far superior in debauch to all who remained; additional reasons to hasten ahead with my plans.

The day following Severino's departure, the monks decided to retrench one more of my companions; I chose for my escape the very day when sentence was pronounced against the wretched girl, so that the monks, preoccupied with her, would pay less attention to me.

It was the beginning of spring; the length of the nights still somewhat favored my designs: for two months I had been preparing them, they were completely unsuspected; little by little I sawed through the bars over my window, using a dull pair of scissors I had found; my head could already pass through the hole; with sheets and linen I had made a cord of more than sufficient length to carry me down the twenty or twenty-five feet Omphale had told me was the building's height. When they had taken my old belongings, I had been careful, as I told you, to remove my little fortune which came to about six louis, and these I had always kept hidden with extreme caution; as I left, I put them into my hair, and nearly all of our chamber having left for that night's supper, finding no one about but one of my companions who had gone to bed as soon as the others had descended, I entered my cabinet; there, clearing the hole I had scrupulously kept covered at all times, I knotted my cord to one of the undamaged bars, then, sliding down outside, I soon touched the ground Ä 'twas not this part which troubled me: the six enclosures of stone and trees my companion had mentioned were what intrigued me far more.

Once there, I discovered that each concentric space between one barrier and the next was no more than eight feet wide, and it was this proximity which assured a casual glance that there was nothing in the area but a dense cluster of trees. The night was very dark; as I turned round the first alley to discover where I might not find a gap in the palisade, I passed beneath the dining hall, which seemed deserted; my inquietude increased; however, I continued my search and thus at last came abreast the window to the main underground room, located directly below that in which the orgies were staged. Much light flooded from the basement, I was bold enough to approach the window and had a perfect view of the interior. My poor companion was stretched out upon a trestle table, her hair in disarray; she was doubtless destined for some terrible torture by which she was going to find freedom, the eternal end of her miseries.... I shuddered, but what my glances fell upon soon astonished me more: Omphale had either not known everything, or had not told all she knew; I spied four naked girls in the basement, and they certainly did not belong to our group; and so there were other victims of these monsters' lechery in this horrible asylum... other wretches unknown to us.... I fled away and continued my circuit until I was on the side opposite the basement window; not yet having found a breach, I resolved to make one; all unobserved, I had furnished myself with a long knife; I set to work; despite my gloves, my hands were soon scratched and torn; but nothing daunted me; the hedge was two feet thick, I opened a passage, went through, and entered the second ring; there, I was surprised to find nothing but soft earth underfoot; with each step I sank in ankle-deep: the further I advanced into these copses, the more profound the darkness became. Curious to know whence came the change of terrain, I felt about with my hands... O Just Heaven! my fingers seized the head of a cadaver! Great God! I thought, whelmed with horror, this must then be the cemetery, as indeed I was told, into which those murderers fling their victims; they have scarcely gone to the bother of covering them with earth!... this skull perhaps belongs to my dear Omphale, perhaps it is that of the unhappy Octavie, so lovely, so sweet, so good, and who while she lived was like unto the rose of which her charms were the image. And I, alas! might that this have been my resting place! Wouldst that I had submitted to my fate! What had I to gain by going on in pursuit of new pitfalls? Had I not committed evil enough? Had I not been the occasion of a number of crimes sufficiently vast? Ah! fulfill my destiny! O Earth, gape wide and swallow me up I Ah, 'tis madness, when one is so forsaken, so poor, so utterly abandoned, madness to go to such pains in order to vegetate yet a few more instants amongst monsters!... But no! I must avenge Virtue in irons.... She expects it of my courage.... Let her not be struck down... let us advance: it is essential that the universe be ridded of villains as dangerous as these. Ought I fear causing the doom of three or four men in order to save the millions of individuals their policy or their ferocity sacrifice?

And therewith I pierce the next hedge; this one was thicker than the first: the further I progressed, the stouter they became. The hole was made, however, but there was firm ground beyond... nothing more betrayed the same horrors I had just encountered; and thus I arrived at the brink of the moat without having met with the wall Omphale had spoken of; indeed, there turned out to be none at all, and it is likely that the monks mentioned it merely to add to our fear. Less shut in when beyond the sextuple enclosure, I was better able to distinguish objects: my eyes at once beheld the church and the bulk of the adjacent building; the moat bordered each of them; I was careful not to attempt to cross it at this point; I moved along the edge and finally discovering myself opposite one of the forest roads, I resolved to make my crossing there and to dash down that road as soon as I had climbed up the other side of the ditch; it was very deep but, to my good fortune, dry and lined with brick, which eliminated all possibilities of slipping; then leapt: a little dazed by my fall, it was a few moments before I got to my feet... I went ahead, got to the further side without meeting any obstacle, but how was I to climb it! I spent some time seeking a means and at last found one where several broken bricks at once gave me the opportunity to use the others as steps and to dig foot-holds in order to mount; I had almost reached the top.when something gave way beneath my weight and I fell back into the moat under the debris I dragged with me; I thought myself dead; this involuntary fall had been more severe than the other; I was, as well, entirely covered with the material which had followed me; some had struck my head... it was cut and bleeding. O God! I cried out in despair, go no further; stay there; 'tis a warning sent from Heaven; God does not want me to go on: perhaps I am deceived in my ideas, perhaps evil is useful on earth, and when God's hand desires it, perhaps it is a sin to resist it! But, soon revolted by that doctrine, the too wretched fruit of the corruption which had surrounded me, I extricated myself from the pile of rubble on top of me and finding it easier to climb by the breach I had just made, for now there were new holes, I try once again, I take courage, a moment later I find myself at the crest. Because of all this I had strayed away from the path I had seen, but having taken careful note of its position, I found it again, and began to run. Before day-break I reached the forest's edge and was soon upon that little hill from which, six long months before, I had, to my sorrow, espied that frightful monastery; I rest a few minutes, I am bathed in perspiration; my first thought is to fall upon my knees and beg God to forgive the sins I unwillingly committed in that odious asylum of crime and impurity; tears of regret soon flowed from my eyes. Alas! I said, I was far less a criminal when last year I left this same road, guided by a devout principle so fatally deceived! O God! In what state may I now behold myself! These lugubrious reflections were in some wise mitigated by the pleasure of discovering I was free; I continued along the road toward Dijon, supposing it would only be in that capital my complaints could be legitimately lodged....

At this point Madame de Lorsange persuaded Therese to catch her breath for a few minutes at least; she needed the rest; the emotion she put into her narrative, the wounds these dreadful recitals reopened in her soul, everything, in short, obliged her to resort to a brief respite. Monsieur de Corville had refreshments brought in, and after collecting her forces, our heroine set out again to pursue her deplorable adventures in great detail, as you shall see.

By the second day all my initial fears of pursuit had dissipated; the weather was extremely warm and, following my thrifty habit, I left the road to find a sheltered place where I could eat a light meal that would fortify me till evening. Off the road to the right stood a little grove of trees through which wound a limpid stream; this seemed a good spot for my lunch. My thirst quenched by this pure cool water, nourished by a little bread, my back leaning against a tree trunk, I breathed deep draughts of clear, serene air which relaxed me and was soothing. Resting there, my thoughts dwelled upon the almost unexampled fatality which, despite the thorns strewn thick along the career of Virtue, repeatedly brought me back, whatever might happen, to the worship of that Divinity and to acts of love and resignation toward the Supreme Being from Whom Virtue emanates and of Whom it is the image. A kind of enthusiasm came and took possession of me; alas! I said to myself, He abandons me not, this God I adore, for even at this instant I find the means to recover my strength. Is it not to Him I owe this merciful favor? And are there not persons in the world to whom it is refused? I am then not completely unfortunate because there are some who have more to complain of than I.... Ah! am I not much less so than the unlucky ones I left in that den of iniquity and vice from which God's kindness caused me to emerge as if by some sort of miracle?... And full of gratitude I threw myself upon my knees, raised my eyes, and fixing the sun, for it seemed to me the Divinity's most splendid achievement, the one which best manifests His greatness, I was drawing from that Star's sublimity new motives for prayer and good works when all of a sudden I felt myself seized by two men who, having cast something over my head to prevent me from seeing and crying out, bound me like a criminal and dragged me away without uttering a word.

And thus had we walked for nearly two hours during which I knew not whither my escorts were taking me when one of them, hearing me gasp for air, proposed to his comrade that I be freed of the sack covering my head; he agreed, I drank in fresh air and observed that we were in the midst of a forest through which we were traveling along a fairly broad although little frequented road. A thousand dark ideas rushed straightway into my mind. I feared I was being led back to their odious monastery.

"Ah," I say to one of my guides, "ah Monsieur, will you tell me where I am being conducted? May I not ask what you intend to do with me ?"

"Be at ease, my child," the man replied, "and do not let the precautions we are obliged to take cause you any fright; we are leading you to a good master; weighty considerations engage him to procure a maid for his wife by means of this mysterious process, but never fear, you will find yourself well off."

"Alas! Messieurs," I answered, "if 'tis my welfare for which you labor it is to no purpose I am constrained; I am a poor orphan, no doubt much to be commiserated; I ask for nothing but a place and since you are giving me one, I have no cause to run away, do I ?"

"She's right," said one of my escorts, "let's make her more comfortable; untie everything but her hands."

They do so and we resume our march. Seeing me calmed, they even respond to my questions, and I finally learn that I am destined to have for master one Comte de Gernande, a native of Paris, but owning considerable property in this country and rich to the tune of five hundred thousand pounds a year, all of which he consumes alone Ä so said one of my guides.

"Alone ?"

"Yes, he is a solitary man, a philosopher: he never sees a soul; but on the other hand he is one of Europe's greatest epicures; there is not an eater in all the world who can hold a candle to him. But I'll say no more about it; you'll see."

"But what do these cautious measures signify, Monsieur?"

"Well, simply this. Our master has the misfortune to have a wife who has become insane; a strict watch must be kept over her, she never leaves her room, no one wishes to be her servant; it would have done no good to propose the work to you, for had you been forewarned you'd never have accepted it. We are obliged to carry girls off by force in order to have someone to exercise this unpleasant function."

"What ? I will be made this lady's captive ?"

"Why, forsooth, yes, you will, and that's why we have you tied this way; but you'll get on... don't fret, you'll get on perfectly; apart from this annoyance, you'll lack nothing."

"Ah! Merciful Heaven! what thralldom!"

"Come, come, my child, courage, you'll get out of it someday and you'll have made your fortune."

 

28.

 

My guide had no sooner finished speaking than we caught sight of the chateau. It was a superb and vast building isolated in the middle of the forest, but this great edifice which could have accommodated hundreds of persons, seemed to be inhabited hardly at all. I only noticed a few signs of life coming from kitchens situated in the vaults below the central part of the structure; all the rest was as deserted as the chateau's site was lonely. No one was there to greet us when we entered; one of my guides went off in the direction of the kitchens, the other presented me to the Count. He was at the far end of a spacious and superb apartment, his body enveloped in an oriental satin dressing gown, reclining upon an ottoman, and having hard by him two young men so indecently, or rather so ridiculously, costumed, their hair dressed with such elegance and skill, that at first I took them for girls; a closer inspection allowed me to recognize them for two youths, one of about fifteen, the other perhaps sixteen. Their faces struck me as charming, but in such a state of dissipated softness and weariness, that at the outset I thought they were ill.

"My Lord, here is a girl," said my guide, "she seems to us to be what might suit you: she is properly bred and gentle and asks only to find a situation; we hope you will be content with her."

" 'Tis well," the Count said with scarcely a glance in my direction; "you, Saint-Louis, will close the doors when you go out and you will say that no one is to enter unless I ring."

Then the Count rose to his feet and came up to examine me. While he makes a detailed investigation I can describe him to you: the portrait's singularity merits an instant's attention. Monsieur de Gernande was at that time a man of fifty, almost six feet tall and monstrously fat. Nothing could be more terrifying than his face, the length of his nose, his wicked black eyes, his large ill-furnished mouth, his formidable high forehead, the sound of his fearful raucous voice, his enormous hands; all combined to make a gigantic individual whose presence inspired much more fear than reassurance. We will soon be able to decide whether the morals and actions of this species of centaur were in keeping with his awesome looks. After the most abrupt and cavalier scrutiny, the Count demanded to Know my age.

"I am twenty-three, Monsieur," I replied.

And to this first question he added some others of a personal nature. I made him privy to everything that concerned me; I did not even omit the brand I had received from Rodin, and when I had represented my misery to him, when I had proven to him that unhappiness had constantly dogged my footsteps:

"So much the better," the dreadful man replied, "so much the better, it will have made you more pliable Ä adaptability counts heavily toward success in this household Ä I see nothing to regret in the wretchedness that hounds an abject race of plebeians Nature has doomed to grovel at our feet throughout the period allotted them to live on the same earth as we. Your sort is more energetic and less insolent, the pressures of adversity help you fulfill your duties toward us."

"But, Monsieur, I told you that I am not of mean birth."

"Yes, yes, I have heard that before, they always pass themselves off for all kinds of things when in fact they are nothing or miserable. Oh indeed, pride's illusions are of the highest usefulness to console fortune's ills, and then, you see, it is up to us to believe what we please about these lofty estates beaten down by the blows of destiny. Pish, d'ye know, it's all the same to me if you fancy yourself a princess. To my consideration you have the look and more or less the costume of a servant, and as such you may enter my hire, if it suits you. However," the hard-hearted man continued, "your welfare, your happiness Ä they are your concern, they depend on your performance: a little patience, some discretion, and in a few years you will be sent forth in a way to avoid further service."

Then he took one after the other of my arms, rolled my sleeves to the elbows, and examined them attentively while asking me how many times I had been bled.

"Twice, Monsieur," I told him, rather surprised at the question, and I mentioned when and under what circumstances it had happened. He pressed his fingers against the veins as one does when one wishes to inflate them, and when they were swollen to the desired point, he fastened his lips to them and sucked. From that instant I ceased to doubt libertinage was involved in this dreadful person's habits, and tormenting anxieties were awakened in my heart.

"I have got to know how you are made," continued the Count, staring at me in a way that set me to trembling; "the post you are to occupy precludes any corporeal defects; show me what you have about you."

I recoiled; but the Count, all his facial muscles beginning to twitch with anger, brutally informed me that I should be ill-advised to play the prude with him, for, said he, there are infallible methods of bringing women to their senses.

"What you have related to me does not betoken a virtue of the highest order; and so your resistance would be quite as misplaced as ludicrous."

Whereupon he made a sign to his young boys who, approaching immediately, fell to undressing me. Against persons as enfeebled, as enervated as those who surrounded me, it is certainly not difficult to defend oneself; but what good would it have done? The cannibal who had cast me into their hands could have pulverized me, had he wished to, with one blow of his fist. I therefore understood I had to yield: an instant later I was unclothed; 'twas scarcely done when I perceived I was exciting those two Ganymedes to gales of laughter.

"Look ye, friend," said the younger, "a girl's a pretty thing, eh ? But what a shame there's that cavity there."

"Oh!" cried the other, "nothing nastier than that hole, I'd not touch a woman even were my fortune at stake."

And while my fore end was the subject of their sarcasms, the Count, an intimate partisan of the behind (unhappily, alas! like every libertine), examined mine with the keenest interest: he handled it brutally, he browsed about with avidity; taking handfuls of flesh between his fingers, he rubbed and kneaded them to the point of drawing blood. Then he made me walk away from him, halt, walk backward in his direction, keeping my behind turned toward him while he dwelled upon the sight of it. When I had returned to him, he made me bend, stoop, squat, stand erect, squeeze and spread. Now and again he slipped to his knees before that part which was his sole concern. He applied kisses to several different areas of it, even a few upon that most secret orifice; but all his kisses were distinguished by suction, his lips felt like leeches. While he was applying them here and there and everywhere he solicited numerous details concerning what had been done to me at the monastery of Saint Mary-in-the-Wood, and without noticing that my recitations doubled his warmth, I was candid enough to give them all with naivete. He summoned up one of his youths and placing him beside me, he untied the bow securing a great red ribbon which gathered in white gauze pantaloons, and brought to light all the charms this garment concealed. After some deft caresses bestowed upon the same altar at which, in me, the Count had signaled his devotion, he suddenly exchanged the object and fell to sucking that part which characterized the child's sex. He continued to finger me: whether because of habit in the youth, whether because of the satyr's dexterity, in a very brief space Nature, vanquished, caused there to flow into the mouth of the one what was ejected from the member of the other. That was how the libertine exhausted the unfortunate children he kept in his house, whose number we will shortly see; 'twas thus he sapped their strength, and that was what caused the languor in which I beheld them to be. And now let us see how he managed to keep women in the same state of prostration and what was the true cause of his own vigor's preservation.

The homage the Count rendered me had been protracted, but during it not a trace of infidelity to his chosen temple had he revealed; neither his glances, nor his kisses, nor his hands, nor his desires strayed away from it for an instant; after having sucked the other lad and having in likewise gathered and devoured his sperm:

"Come," he said to me, drawing me into an adjacent room before I could gather up my clothes, "come, I am going to show you how we manage."

I was unable to dissimulate my anxiety, it was terrible; but there was no other way to put a different aspect upon my fate, I had to quaff to the lees the potion in the chalice tendered to me.

Two other boys of sixteen, quite as handsome, quite as peaked as the first two we had left in the salon, were working upon a tapestry when we entered the room. Upon our entrance they rose.

"Narcisse," said the Count to one of them, "here is the Countess' new chambermaid; I must test her; hand me the lancets."

Narcisse opens a cupboard and immediately produces all a surgeon's gear. I allow your imagination to fancy my state; my executioner spied my embarrassment, and it merely excited his mirth.

"Put her in place, Zephire," Monsieur de Gernande said to another of the youths, and this boy approached me with a smile.

"Don't be afraid, Mademoiselle," said he, "it can only do you the greatest good. Take your place here."

It was a question of kneeling lightly upon the edge of a tabouret located in the middle of the room; one's arms were elevated and attached to two black straps which descended from the ceiling.

No sooner have I assumed the posture than the Count steps up scalpel in hand: he can scarcely breathe, his eyes are alive with sparks, his face smites me with terror; he ties bands about both my arms, and in a flash he has lanced each of them. A cry bursts from between his teeth, it is accompanied by two or three blasphemies when he catches sight of my blood; he retires to a distance of six feet and sits down. The light garment covering him is soon deployed; Zephire kneels between his thighs and sucks him; Narcisse, his feet planted on his master's armchair, presents the same object to him to suckle he is himself having drained by Zephire. Gernande gets his hands upon the boy's loins, squeezes them, presses them to him, but quits them long enough to cast his inflamed eyes toward me. My blood is escaping in floods and is falling into two white basins situated underneath my arms. I soon feel myself growing faint.

"Monsieur, Monsieur," I cry, "have pity on me, I am about to collapse." I sway, totter, am held up by the straps, am unable to fall; but my arms having shifted, and my head slumping upon my shoulder, my face is now washed with blood. The Count is drunk with joy... however, I see nothing like the end of his operation approaching, I swoon before he reaches his goal; he was perhaps only able to attain it upon seeing me in this state, perhaps his supreme ecstasy depended upon this morbid picture.... At any rate, when I returned to my senses I found myself in an excellent bed, with two old women standing near me; as soon as they saw me open my eyes, they brought me a cup of bouillon and, at three-hour intervals, rich broths; this continued for two days, at the end of which Monsieur de Gernande sent to have me get up and come for a conversation in the same salon where I had been received upon my arrival. I was led to him; I was still a little weak and giddy, but otherwise well; I arrived.

"Therese," said the Count, bidding me be seated, "I shall not very often repeat such exercises with you, your person is useful for other purposes; but it was of the highest importance I acquaint you with my tastes and the manner in which you will expire in this house should you betray me one of these days, should you be unlucky enough to let yourself be suborned by the woman in whose society you are going to be placed.

"That woman belongs to me, Therese, she is my wife and that title is doubtless the most baleful she could have, since it obliges her to lend herself to the bizarre passion whereof you have been a recent victim; do not suppose it is vengeance that prompts me to treat her thus, scorn, or any sentiment of hostility or hatred; it is merely a question of passion. Nothing equals the pleasure I experience upon shedding her blood... I go mad when it flows; I have never enjoyed this woman in any other fashion. Three years have gone by since I married her, and for three years she has been regularly exposed every four days to the treatment you have undergone. Her youth (she is not yet twenty), the special care given her, all this keeps her aright; and as the reservoir is replenished at the same rate it is tapped, she has been in fairly good health since the regime began. Our relations being what they are, you perfectly well appreciate why I can neither allow her to go out nor to receive visitors. And so I represent her as insane and her mother, the only living member of her family, who resides in a chateau six leagues from here, is so firmly convinced of her derangement that she dares not even come to see her. Not infrequently the Countess implores my mercy, there is nothing she omits to do in order to soften me; but I doubt whether she shall ever succeed. My lust decreed her fate, it is immutable, she will go on in this fashion so long as she is able; while she lives she will want nothing and as I am incredibly fond of what can be drained from her living body, I will keep her alive as long as possible; when finally she can stand it no more, well, tush, Nature will take its course. She's my fourth; I'll soon have a fifth. Nothing disturbs me less than to lose a wife. There are so many women about, and it is so pleasant to change.

 

29.

 

"In any event, Therese, your task is to look after her. Her blood is let once every ninety-six hours; she loses two bowls of it each time and nowadays no longer faints, having got accustomed to it. Her prostration lasts twenty-four hours; she is bedridden one day out of every four, but during the remaining three she gets on tolerably well. But you may easily understand this life displeases her; at the outset there was nothing she would not try to deliver herself from it, nothing she did not undertake to acquaint her mother with her real situation: she seduced two of her maid-servants whose maneuvers were detected early enough to defeat their success: she was the cause of these two unhappy creatures' ruin, today she repents what she did and, recognizing the irremediable character of her destiny, she is co-operating cheerfully and has promised not to make confederates of the help I hire to care for her. But this secret and what becomes of those who conspire to betray me, these matters, Therese, oblige me to put no one in her neighborhood but persons who, like yourself, have been impressed; and thus inquiries are avoided. Not having carried you off from anyone's house, not having to render an account of you to anyone at all, nothing stands in the way of my punishing you, if you deserve to be, in a manner which, although you will be deprived of mortal breath, cannot nevertheless expose me to interrogations or embroil me in any unpleasantnesses. As of the present moment you inhabit the world no longer, since the least impulse of my will can cause you to disappear from it. What can you expect at my hands? Happiness if you behave properly, death if you seek to play me false. Were these alternatives not so clear, were they not so few, I would ask for your response; but in your present situation we can dispense with questions and answers. I have you, Therese, and hence you must obey me.... Let us go to my wife's apartment."

Having nothing to object to a discourse as precise as this, I followed my master: we traversed a long gallery, as dark, as solitary as the rest of the chateau; a door opens, we enter an antechamber where I recognize the two elderly women who waited upon me during my coma and recovery. They got up and introduced us into a superb apartment where we found the unlucky Countess doing tambour brocade as she reclined upon a chaise longue; she rose when she saw her husband.

"Be seated," the Count said to her, "I permit you to listen to me thus. Here at last we have a maid for you, Madame," he continued, "and I trust you will remember what has befallen the others Ä and that you will not try to plunge this one into an identical misfortune."

"It would be useless," I said, full eager to be of help to this poor woman and wishing to disguise my designs, "yes, Madame, I dare certify in your presence that it would be to no purpose, you will not speak one word to me I shall not report immediately to his Lordship, and I shall certainly not jeopardize my life in order to serve you."

"I will undertake nothing, Mademoiselle, which might force you into that position," said this poor woman who did not yet grasp my motives for speaking in this wise; "rest assured: I solicit nothing but your care."

"It will be entirely yours, Madame," I answered, "but beyond that, nothing."

And the Count, enchanted with me, squeezed my hand as he whispered: "Nicely done, Therese, your prosperity is guaranteed if you conduct yourself as you say you will." The Count then showed me to my room which adjoined the Countess' and he showed me as well that the entirety of this apartment, closed by stout doors and double grilled at every window, left no hope of escape.

"And here you have a terrace," Monsieur de Gernande went on, leading me out into a little garden on a level with the apartment, "but its elevation above the ground ought not, I believe, give you the idea of measuring the walls; the Countess is permitted to take fresh air out here whenever she wishes, you will keep her company... adieu."

I returned to my mistress and, as at first we spent a few moments examining one another without speaking, I obtained a good picture of her Ä but let me paint it for you.

Madame de Gernande, aged nineteen and a half, had the most lovely, the most noble, the most majestic figure one could hope to see, not one of her gestures, not a single movement was without gracefulness, not one of her glances lacked depth of sentiment: nothing could equal the expression of her eyes, which were a beautiful dark brown although her hair was blond; but a certain languor, a lassitude entailed by her misfortunes, dimmed their e'clat, and thereby rendered them a thousand times more interesting; her skin was very fair, her hair very rich; her mouth was very small, perhaps too small, and I was little surprised to find this defect in her: 'twas a pretty rose not yet in full bloom; but teeth so white... lips of a vermillion... one might have said Love had colored them with tints borrowed from the goddess of flowers; her nose was aquiline, straight, delicately modeled; upon her brow curved two ebony eyebrows; a perfectly lovely chin; a visage, in one word, of the finest oval shape, over whose entirety reigned a kind of attractiveness, a naivete, an openness which might well have made one take this adorable face for an angelic rather than mortal physiognomy. Her arms, her breasts, her flanks were of a splendor... of a round fullness fit to serve as models to an artist; a black silken fleece covered her mons veneris, which was sustained by two superbly cast thighs; and what astonished me was that, despite the slenderness of the Countess' figure, despite her sufferings, nothing had impaired the firm quality of her flesh: her round, plump buttocks were as smooth, as ripe, as firm as if her figure were heavier and as if she had always dwelled in the depths of happiness. However, frightful traces of her husband's libertinage were scattered thickly about; but, I repeat, nothing spoiled, nothing damaged... the very image of a beautiful lily upon which the honeybee has inflicted some scratches. To so many gifts Madame de Gernande added a gentle nature, a romantic and tender mind, a heart of such sensibility!... well-educated, with talents... a native art for seduction which no one but her infamous husband could resist, a charming timbre in her voice and much piety: such was the unhappy wife of the Comte de Gernande, such was the heavenly creature against whom he had plotted; it seemed that the more she inspired ideas, the more she inflamed his ferocity, and that the abundant gifts she had received from Nature only became further motives for that villain's cruelties.

"When were you last bled, Madame?" I asked in order to have her understand I was acquainted with everything.

"Three days ago," she said, "and it is to be tomorrow...." Then, with a sigh: "... yes, tomorrow... Mademoiselle, tomorrow you will witness the pretty scene."

"And Madame is not growing weak?"

"Oh, Great Heaven! I am not twenty and am sure I shall be no weaker at seventy. But it will come to an end, I flatter myself in the belief, for it is perfectly impossible for me to live much longer this way: I will go to my Father, in the arms of the Supreme Being I will seek a place of rest men have so cruelly denied me on earth."

These words clove my heart; wishing to maintain my role, I disguised my trouble, but upon the instant I made an inward promise to lay down my life a thousand times, if necessary, rather than leave this ill-starred victim in the clutches of this monstrous debauchee.

The Countess was on the point of taking her dinner. The two old women came to tell me to conduct her into her cabinet; I transmitted the message; she was accustomed to it all, she went out at once, and the two women, aided by the two valets who had carried me off, served a sumptuous meal upon a table at which my place was set opposite my mistress. The valets retired and the women informed me that they would not stir from the antechamber so as to be near at hand to receive whatever might be Madame's orders. I relayed this to the Countess, she took her place and, with an air of friendliness and affability which entirely won my heart, invited me to join her. There were at least twenty dishes upon the table.

"With what regards this aspect of things, Mademoiselle, you see that they treat me well."

"Yes, Madame," I replied, "and I know it is the wish of Monsieur le Comte that you lack nothing." "Oh yes! But as these attentions are motivated only by cruelty, my feelings are scarcely of gratitude."

Her constant state of debilitation and perpetual need of what would revive her strength obliged Madame de Gernande to eat copiously. She desired partridge and Rouen duckling; they were brought to her in a trice. After the meal, she went for some air on the terrace, but upon rising she took my arm, for she was quite unable to take ten steps without someone to lean upon. It was at this moment she showed me all those parts of her body I have just described to you; she exhibited her arms: they were covered with small scars.

"Ah, he does not confine himself to that," she said, "there is not a single spot on my wretched person whence he does not love to see blood flow."

And she allowed me to see her feet, her neck, the lower part of her breasts and several other fleshy areas equally speckled with healed punctures. That first day I limited myself to murmuring a few sympathetic words and we retired for the night.

The morrow was the Countess' fatal day. Monsieur de Gernande, who only performed the operation after his dinner Ä which he always took before his wife ate hers Ä had me join him at table; it was then, Madame, I beheld that ogre fall to in a manner so terrifying that I could hardly believe my eyes. Four domestics, amongst them the pair who had led me to the chateau, served this amazing feast. It deserves a thorough description: I shall give it you without exaggeration. The meal was certainly not intended simply to overawe me. What I witnessed then was an everyday affair.

Two soups were brought on, one a consomme flavored with saffron, the other a ham bisque; then a sirloin of English roast beef, eight hors d'oeuvres, five substantial entrees, five others only apparently lighter, a boar's head in the midst of eight braised dishes which were relieved by two services of entremets, then sixteen plates of fruit; ices, six brands of wine, four varieties of liqueur and coffee. Monsieur de Gernande attacked every dish, and several were polished off to the last scrap; he drank a round dozen bottles of wine, four, to begin with, of Burgundy, four of Champagne with the roasts; Tokay, Mulseau, Hermitage and Madeira were downed with the fruit. He finished with two bottles of West Indies rum and ten cups of coffee.

As fresh after this performance as he might have been had he just waked from sleep, Monsieur de Gernande said:

"Off we go to bleed your mistress; I trust you will let me know if I manage as nicely with her as I did with you."

Two young boys I had not hitherto seen, and who were of the same age as the others, were awaiting at the door of the Countess' apartment; it was then the Count informed me he had twelve minions and renewed them every year. These seemed yet prettier than the ones I had seen hitherto; they were livelier... we went in.... All the ceremonies I am going to describe now, Madame, were part of a ritual from which the Count never deviated, they were scrupulously observed upon each occasion, and nothing ever changed except the place where the incisions were made.

The Countess, dressed only in a loose-floating muslin robe, fell to her knees instantly the Count entered.

"Are you ready?" her husband inquired.

"For everything, Monsieur," was the humble reply; "you know full well I am your victim and you have but to command me. '

Monsieur de Gernande thereupon told me to undress his wife and lead her to him. Whatever the loathing I sensed for all these horrors, you understand, Madame, I had no choice but to submit with the most entire resignation. In all I have still to tell you, do not, I beseech you, do not at any time regard me as anything but a slave; I complied simply because I could not do otherwise, but never did I act willingly in anything whatsoever.

I removed my mistress' simar, and when she was naked conducted her to her husband who had already taken his place in a large armchair: as part of the ritual she perched upon this armchair and herself presented to his kisses that favorite part over which he had made such a to-do with me and which, regardless of person or sex, seemed to affect him in the same way.

"And now spread them, Madame," the Count said brutally.

And for a long time he rollicked about with what he enjoyed the sight of; he had it assume various positions, he opened it, he snapped it shut; with tongue and fingertip he tickled the narrow aperture; and soon carried away by his passions' ferocity, he plucked up a pinch of flesh, squeezed it, scratched it. Immediately he produced a small wound he fastened his mouth to the spot. I held his unhappy victim during these preliminaries, the two boys, completely naked, toiled upon him in relays; now one, now the other knelt between Gernande's thighs and employed his mouth to excite him. It was then I noticed, not without astonishment, that this giant, this species of monster whose aspect alone was enough to strike terror, was howbeit barely a man; the most meager, the most minuscule excrescence of flesh or, to make a juster comparison, what one might find in a child of three was all one discovered upon this so very enormous and otherwise so corpulent individual; but its sensations were not for that the less keen and each pleasurable vibration was as a spasmodic attack. After this prologue he stretched out upon a couch and wanted his wife, seated astride his chest, to keep her behind poised over his visage while with her mouth she rendered him, by means of suckings, the same service he had just received from the youthful Ganymedes who were simultaneously, one to the left, one to the right, being excited by him; my hands meanwhile worked upon his behind: I titillated it, I polluted it in every sense; this phase of activities lasted more than a quarter of an hour but, producing no results, had to be given up for another; upon her husband's instructions I stretched the Countess upon a chaise longue: she lay on her back, her legs spread as wide as possible. The sight of what she exposed put her husband in a kind of rage, he dwelt upon the perspective... his eyes blaze, he curses; like one crazed he leaps upon his wife, with his scalpel pricks her in several places, but these were all superficial gashes, a drop or two of blood, no more, seeped from each. These minor cruelties came to an end at last; others began. The Count sits down again, he allows his wife a moment's respite, and, turning his attention to his two little followers, he now obliges them to suck each other, and now he arranges them in such a way that while he sucks one, the other sucks him, and now again the one he sucked first brings round his mouth to render the same service to him by whom he was sucked: the Count received much but gave little. Such was his satiety, such his impotence that the extremest efforts availed not at all, and he remained in his torpor: he did indeed seem to experience some very violent reverberations, but nothing manifested itself; he several times ordered me to suck his little friends and immediately to convey to his mouth whatever incense I drained from them; finally he flung them one after the other at the miserable Countess. These young men accosted her, insulted her, carried insolence to the point of beating her, slapping her, and the more they molested her, the more loudly the Count praised and egged them on.

 

30.

 

Then Gernande turned to me; I was in front of him, my buttocks at the level of his face, and he paid his respects to his God; but he did not abuse me; nor do I know why he did not torment his Ganymedes; he chose to reserve all his unkindness for the Countess. Perhaps the honor of being allied to him established one's right to suffer mistreatment at his hands; perhaps he was moved to cruelty only by attachments which contributed energy to his outrages. One can imagine anything about such minds, and almost always safely wager that what seems most apt to be criminal is what will inflame them most. At last he places his young friends and me beside his wife and enlaces our bodies; here a man, there a woman, etc., all four dressing their behinds; he takes his stand some distance away and muses upon the panorama, then he comes near, touches, feels, compares, caresses; the youths and I were not persecuted, but each time he came to his wife, he fussed and bothered and vexed her in some way or other. Again the scene changes: he has the Countess lie belly down upon a divan and taking each boy in turn, he introduces each of them into the narrow avenue Madame's posture exposes: he allows them to become aroused, but it is nowhere but in his mouth the sacrifice is to be consummated; as one after another they emerge he sucks each. While one acts, he has himself sucked by the other, and his tongue wanders to the throne of voluptuousness the agent presents to him. This activity continues a long time, it irritates the Count, he gets to his feet and wishes me to take the Countess' place; I instantly beg him not to require it of me, but he insists. He lays his wife upon her back, has me superimpose myself upon her with my flanks raised in his direction and thereupon he orders his aides to plumb me by the forbidden passage: he brings them up, his hands guide their introduction; meanwhile, I have got to stimulate the Countess with my fingers and kiss her mouth; as for the Count, his offertory is still the same; as each of the boys cannot act without exhibiting to him one of the sweetest objects of his veneration, he turns it all to his profit and, as with the Countess, he who has just perforated me is obliged to go, after a few lunges and retreats, and spill into his mouth the incense I have warmed. When the boys are finished, seemingly inclined to replace them, the Count glues himself to my buttocks.

"Superfluous efforts," he cries, "this is not what I must have... to the business... the business... however pitiable my state... I can hold back no longer... come, Countess, your arms!"

He seizes her ferociously, places her as I was placed, arms suspended by two black straps; mine is the task of securing the bands; he inspects the knots: finding them too loose, he tightens them, "So that," he says, "the blood will spurt out under greater pressure"; he feels the veins, and lances them, on each arm, at almost the same moment. Blood leaps far: he is in an ecstasy; and adjusting himself so that he has a clear view of these two fountains, he has me kneel between his legs so I can suck him; he does as much for first one and then the other of his little friends, incessantly eyeing the jets of blood which inflame him. For my part, certain the instant at which the hoped for crisis occurs will bring a conclusion to the Countess' torments, I bring all my efforts to bear upon precipitating this denouement, and I become, as, Madame, you observe, I become a whore from kindness, a libertine through virtue. The much awaited moment arrives at last; I am not familiar with its dangers or violence, for the last time it had taken place I had been unconscious... Oh, Madame! what extravagance! Gernande remained delirious for ten minutes, flailing his arms, staggering, reeling like one falling in a fit of epilepsy, and uttering screams which must have been audible for a league around; his oaths were excessive; lashing out at everyone at hand, his strugglings were dreadful. The two little ones are sent tumbling head over heels; he wishes to fly at his wife, I restrain him: I pump the last drop from him, his need of me makes him respect me; at last I bring him to his senses by ridding him of that fiery liquid, whose heat, whose viscosity, and above all whose abundance puts him in such a frenzy I believe he is going to expire; seven or eight tablespoons would scarcely have contained the discharge, and the thickest gruel would hardly give a notion of its consistency; and with all that, no appearance of an erection at all, rather, the limp look and feel of exhaustion: there you have the contrarieties which, better than might I, explain artists of the Count's breed. The Count ate excessively and only dissipated each time he bled his wife, every four days, that is to say. Would this be the cause of the phenomenon? I have no idea, and not daring to ascribe a reason to what I do not understand, I will be content to relate what I saw.

However, I rush to the Countess, I stanch her blood, untie her, and deposit her upon a couch in a state of extreme weakness; but the Count, totally indifferent to her, without condescending to cast even a glance at this victim stricken by his rage, abruptly goes out with his aides, leaving me to put things in whatever order I please. Such is the fatal apathy which better than all else characterizes the true libertine soul: if he is merely carried away by passion's heat, limned with remorse will be his face when, calmed again, he beholds the baleful effects of delirium; but if his soul is utterly corrupt? then such consequences will affright him not: he will observe them with as little trouble as regret, perhaps even with some of the emotion of those infamous lusts which produced them.

I put Madame de Gernande to bed. She had, so she said, lost much more this time than she ordinarily did; but such good care and so many restoratives were lavished upon her, that she appeared well two days later. That same evening, when I had completed all my chores in the Countess' apartment, word arrived that the Count desired to speak to me; Gernande was taking supper; I was obliged to wait upon him while he fed with a much greater intemperance than at dinner; four of his pretty little friends were seated round the table with him and there, every evening, he regularly drank himself into drunkenness; but to that end, twenty bottles of the most excellent wine were scarcely sufficient and I often saw him empty thirty. And every evening, propped up by his minions, the debauchee went to bed, and took one or two of the boys with him; these were nothing but vehicles which disposed him for the great scene.

But I had discovered the secret of winning this man's very highest esteem: he frankly avowed to me that few women had pleased him so much; and thereby I acquired the right to his confidence, which I only exploited in order to serve my mistress.

One morning Gernande called me to his room to inform me of some new libertine schemes; after having listened closely and approved enthusiastically, and seeing him in a relatively calm state, I undertook to persuade him to mitigate his poor wife's fate. "Is it possible, Monsieur," I said to him, "that one may treat a woman in this manner, even setting aside all the ties which bind you to her ? Condescend to reflect upon her sex's touching graces."

"Oh Therese!" the Count answered with alacrity, "why in order to pacify me do you bring me arguments which could not more positively arouse me? Listen to me, my dear girl," he continued, having me take a place beside him, "and whatever the invectives you may hear me utter against your sex, don't lose your temper; no, a reasoned discussion; I'll yield to your arguments if they're logically sound.

"How are you justified, pray tell me, Therese, in asserting that a husband lies under the obligation to make his wife happy? and what titles dares this woman cite in order to extort this happiness from her husband? The necessity mutually to render one another happy cannot legitimately exist save between two persons equally furnished with the capacity to do one another hurt and, consequently, between two persons of commensurate strength: such an association can never come into being unless a contract is immediately formed between these two persons, which obligates each to employ against the other no kind of force but what will not be injurious to either; but this ridiculous convention assuredly can never obtain between two persons one of whom is strong and the other weak. What entitles the latter to require the former to treat kindly with him? and what sort of a fool would the stronger have to be in order to subscribe to such an agreement? I can agree not to employ force against him whose own strength makes him to be feared; but what could motivate me to moderate the effects of my strength upon the being Nature subordinates to me? Pity, do you say? That sentiment is fitting for no one but the person who resembles me and as he is an egoist too, pity's effects only occur under the tacit circumstances in which the individual who inspires my commiseration has sympathy for me in his turn; but if my superiority assures me a constant ascendancy over him, his sympathy becoming valueless to me, I need never, in order to excite it, consent to any sacrifice. Would I not be a fool to feel pity for the chicken they slaughtered for my dinner? That object, too inferior to me, lacking any relation to me, can never excite any feelings in me; well, the relationships of a wife to her husband and that of the chicken to myself are of identical consequence, the one and the other are household chattels which one must use, which one must employ for the purpose indicated by Nature, without any differentiation whatsoever. But, I ask, had it been Nature's intention to create your sex for the happiness of ours and vice versa, would this blind Nature have caused the existence of so many ineptitudes in the construction of the one and the other of those sexes? Would she have implanted faults so grave in each that mutual estrangement and antipathy were bound infallibly to be their result? Without going any further in search of examples, be so good as to tell me, Therese, knowing my organization to be what it is, what woman could I render happy? and, reversibly, to what man can the enjoyment of a woman be sweet when he is not endowed with the gigantic proportions necessary to satisfy her? In your opinion, will they be moral qualities which will compensate his physical shortcomings? And what thinking being, upon knowing a woman to her depths, will not cry with Euripides: 'That one amongst the Gods who brought women into the world may boast of having produced the worst of all creatures and the most afflicting to man.' If then it is demonstrated that the two sexes do not at all sort agreeably with each other and that there is not one well-founded grievance of the one which could not equally and immediately be voiced by the other, it is therefore false, from this moment, to say that Nature created them for their reciprocal happiness. She may have permitted them the desire to attain each other's vicinity in order to conjugate in the interests of propagation, but in no wise in order to form attachments with the design of discovering a mutual felicity. The weaker therefore having no right to mouth complaints with the object of wresting pity from the stronger and no longer being able to raise the objection that the stronger depends for his happiness upon her, the weaker, I say, has no alternative but to submit; and as, despite the difficulty of achieving that bilateral happiness, it is natural that individuals of both sexes labor at nothing but to procure it for themselves, the weaker must reconcile herself to distilling from her submissiveness the only dose of happiness she can possibly hope to cull, and the stronger must strive after his by whatever oppressive methods he is pleased to employ, since it is proven that the mighty's sole happiness is yielded him by the exercise of his strong faculties, by, that is to say, the most thorough-going tyranny; thus, that happiness the two sexes cannot find with each other they will find, one in blind obedience, the other in the most energetic expression of his domination. Why! were it not Nature's intention that one of the sexes tyrannize the other, would she not have created them equally strong? By rendering one in every particular inferior to the other, has she not adequately indicated that she wills the mightier to exploit the rights she has given him? the more the latter broadens his authority, the more, by means of his preponderance, he worsens the misery of the woman enthralled by her destiny, the better he answers Nature's intentions; the frail being's complaints do not provide a correct basis for analyzing the process; judgments thus come by would be nothing if not vicious, since, to reach them, you would have to appropriate none but the feeble's ideas: the suit must be judged upon the stronger party's power, upon the scope he has given to his power, and when this power's effects are brought to bear upon a woman, one must examine the question, What is a woman? and how has this contemptible sex been viewed in ancient times and in our own by seventy-five per cent of the peoples of this earth?

"Now, what do I observe upon coolly proceeding to this investigation? A puny creature, always inferior to man, infinitely less attractive than he, less ingenious, less wise, constructed in a disgusting manner entirely opposite to what is capable of pleasing a man, to what is able to delight him... a being three-quarters of her life untouchable, unwholesome, unable to satisfy her mate throughout the entire period Nature constrains her to childbearing, of a sharp turn of humor, shrill, shrewish, bitter, and thwart; a tyrant if you allow her privileges, mean, vile, and a sneak in bondage; always false, forever mischievous, constantly dangerous; in short, a being so perverse that during several convocations the question was very soberly agitated at the Council of Macon whether or not this peculiar creature, as distinct from man as is man from the ape, had any reasonably legitimate pretensions to classification as a human; but this quandary might be merely an error of the times; were women more favorably viewed in earlier ages? Did the Persians, the Medes, the Babylonians, the Greeks, the Romans honor this odious sex we are able to dare make our idol today? Alas! I see it oppressed everywhere, everywhere rigorously banished from affairs, condemned everywhere, vilified, sequestered, locked up; women treated, in a word, like beasts one stables in the barn and puts to use when the need arises. Do I pause a moment at Rome? then I hear the wise Cato exclaim from the heart of the ancient world's capital: 'Were women lacking to men, they would yet hold conversation with the Gods.' I hear a Roman censor begin his harangue with these words: 'Gentlemen, were we ever to find a means to live without women, thereupon unto us should true happiness be known.' I hear the Greek theater resound to these lines intoned: 'O Zeus! what reason was it obliged thee to create women? couldst not have given being to humankind by better devices and wiser, by schemes which in a word would have spared us this female pestilence?' I see this same Greek race hold that sex in such high contempt legislation was needed to oblige a Spartan to reproduce, and one of the penalties decreed in those enlightened republics was to compel a malefactor to garb himself in a woman's attire, that is to say, to wear the raiments of the vilest and most scorned creature of which man had acquaintance.

"But without inquiring for examples in ages at such a great remove from ours, with what sort of an eye is this wretched sex still viewed upon the earth's surface? How is it dealt with? I behold it imprisoned throughout Asia and serving there as slave to the barbarous whims of a despot who molests it, torments it, and turns its sufferings into a game. In America I find a naturally humane race, the Eskimos, practicing all possible acts of beneficence amongst men and treating women with all imaginable severity: I see them humiliated, prostituted to strangers in one part of the world, used as currency in another. In Africa, where without doubt their station is yet further degraded, I notice them toiling in the manner of beasts of burden, tilling the soil, fertilizing it and sowing seed, and serving their husbands on their knees only. Will I follow Captain Cook in his newest discoveries? Is the charming isle of Tahiti, where pregnancy is a crime sometimes meriting death for the mother and almost always for the child, to offer me women enjoying a happier lot? In the other islands this same mariner charted, I find them beaten, harassed by their own offspring, and bullied by the husband himself who collaborates with his family to torment them with additional rigor.

"Oh, Therese I let not all this astonish you, nor be more surprised by the general pre-eminence accorded men over their wives in all epochs: the more a people is in harmony with Nature, the better will be its use of her laws; the wife can have no relation to her husband but that of a slave to his master; very decidedly she has no right to pretend to more cherished titles. One must not mistake for a prerogative the ridiculous abuses which, by degrading our sex, momentarily elevates yours: the cause for these travesties must be sought out, enunciated, and afterward one must only the more constantly return to reason's sagacious counsels. Well, Therese, here is the cause of the temporary respect your sex once upon a time enjoyed and which it still misuses today while they who perpetuate it are unaware of what they are doing.

"In the Gaul of long ago, that is to say, in that one part of the world where women were not totally treated as slaves, women had the habit of prophesying, of predicting the happy event: the people fancied they plied their trade successfully only because of the intimate commerce they doubtless had with the Gods; whence they were, so to speak, associated with the sacerdotal and enjoyed a measure of the consideration lavished upon priests. French chivalry was founded upon these inanities and finding them favorable to its spirit, adopted them: but what happened next was what happens always: the causes became extinct, the effects were preserved; chivalry vanished, the prejudices it nourished persevered. This ancient veneration accorded for no sound reason could not itself be annihilated when what founded the illusion had dissipated: we no longer stand in awe of witches, but we reverence whores and, what is worse, we continue to kill each other for them. May such platitudes cease to influence these our philosophers' minds, and restoring women to their true position, may the intelligent spirit conceive them, as Nature indicates, as the wisest peoples acknowledge, to be nothing but individuals created for their pleasures, submitted to their caprices, objects whose frailty and wickedness make them deserving of naught but contempt.

"But not only, Therese, did all the peoples of the earth enjoy the most extensive rights over their women, there were even to be found certain races which condemned women to death immediately they were born into the world, and of their numbers retained only those few necessary to the race's reproduction. The Arabs known as Koreish interred their daughters at the age of seven upon a mountain near Mecca, because, said they, so vile a sex appeared to them unworthy of seeing the light; in the seraglio of the King of Achem, the most appalling tortures are applied as punishment for the mere suspicion of infidelity, for the slightest disobedience in the service of the prince's lusts, or as soon as his women inspire his distaste; upon the banks of the River Ganges they are obliged to immolate themselves over their husbands' ashes, for they are esteemed of no further purpose in the world once their lords are able to enjoy them no more; in other regions they are hunted like wild beasts, 'tis an honor to kill a quantity of them; in Egypt they are sacrificed to the Gods; they are trampled under foot in Formosa if they become pregnant; German law condemned the man who killed a foreign woman to pay a fine of about ten crowns, nothing at all if the woman was his own or a courtesan; everywhere, to be brief, everywhere, I repeat, I see women humiliated, molested, everywhere sacrificed to the superstition of priests, to the savagery of husbands, to the playfulness of libertines. And because I have the misfortune to live amidst a people still so uncouth as not to dare abolish the most ludicrous of prejudices, I should deprive myself of the rights Nature has granted me! I should forgo all the pleasures to which these privileges give birth... Come, come, Therese, that's not just, no, 'tis unfair: I will conceal my behavior because I must, but I will be compensated, in the retreat where I have exiled myself, and silently, for the absurd chains to which I am condemned by legislation, and here I will treat my wife as I like, for I find my right to do so lettered in all the universe's codes, graved in my heart, and sealed in Nature."

"Oh Monsieur," said I, "your conversion is impossible."

"And I advise you not to attempt it, Therese," Gernande answered; "the tree is too long out of the nursery; at my age one can advance a few steps in the career of evil, but not one toward good. My principles and my tastes have brought me joy since childhood, they have always been the unique bases of my conduct and actions: I will, who knows? go further, I have the feeling it could be done, but return? never; I have too great a horror for mankind's prejudices, I too sincerely hate their civilization, their virtue and their Gods ever to sacrifice my penchants to them." From this moment I saw very clearly that nothing remained for me, in order either to extricate myself from this house or to save the Countess, but the employment of strategems and joint action with her.

 

31.

 

During the year I had spent in the house, what I had allowed her to read in my heart was more than sufficient to dispel any doubts she might have of my desire to serve her, and now she could not fail to divine what had at first prompted me to act differently. I became less guarded, then spoke; she assented; we settled upon a plan: it was to inform her mother, to expose the Count's infamies to her eyes. Madame de Gernande was certain that unfortunate lady would hasten with all expedition to sever her daughter's bonds; but how were we to approach her? for we were so securely imprisoned, so closely watched! Accustomed to coping with ramparts, I gauged those upon which the terrace was raised: their height was scarcely thirty feet; there was no other enclosure in sight; once at the foot of the wall I thought one would find oneself already on the road through the forest; but the Countess, having been brought to this apartment at night and never having left it since, was unable to confirm my ideas. I agreed to attempt the descent; the letter Madame de Gernande wrote to her mother could not have been better phrased to melt and persuade her to come to the rescue of her most unhappy daughter; I slipped the letter into my bosom, I embraced that dear and attractive woman, then, as soon as night had fallen, aided by our bed linen, I slid to the ground outside the fortress. What had become of me, O Heaven? I discovered that instead of being outside the enclosure I was simply in a park, and in a park girt by walls which the quantity and dense foliage of trees had camouflaged from sight: these battlements were more than forty feet high, all of them garnished at the top with broken glass, and of a prodigious thickness... what was to become of me? Dawn was not far off: what would they think when I was found in a place into which I could not have come without a certain plan of escape? Would I be able to keep the Count's fury at bay? Was it not very likely that ogre would drink my blood to punish such an offense? To return was out of the question, the Countess had drawn back the sheets; to knock at the door would be still more certainly to betray myself; a little more and I would have lost my head altogether and ceded to the violent effects of my despair. Had I been able to recognize some pity in the Count's soul, I might perhaps have been lulled into hopefulness, but a tyrant, a barbarian, a man who detested women and who, he said, had long been seeking the occasion to immolate one by draining away her blood drop by drop in order to find out how many hours she would be able to last... No doubt about it, he was going to put me to the test. Knowing not what would happen or what to do, discovering dangers everywhere, I threw myself down beside a tree, determined to await my fate and silently resigning myself to the Eternal's will.... The sun rose at last; merciful Heaven! the first object to present itself to me... is the Count himself: it had been frightfully warm during the night, he had stepped out to take a breath of air. He believes he is in error, he supposes this a specter, he recoils, rarely is courage a traitor's virtue: I get trembling to my feet, I fling myself at his knees.

"Therese! What are you doing here ?" he demands.

"Oh, Monsieur, punish me," I reply, "I am guilty and have nothing to answer you."

Unhappily, in my fright I had forgotten to destroy the Countess' letter: he suspects its existence, asks for it, I wish to deny I have it; but Gernande sees the fatal letter protruding above my kerchief, snatches, it, reads it, and orders me to follow him.

We enter the chateau, descend a hidden stairway leading down to the vaults: the most profound stillness reigns there below ground; after several detours, the Count opens a dungeon and casts me into it.

"Impudent girl," says he, "I gave you warning that the crime you have just committed is punished here by death: therefore prepare yourself to undergo the penalty you have been pleased to incur. When tomorrow I rise from dinner I am going to dispatch you."

Once again I fall prostrate before him but, seizing me by the hair, he drags me along the ground, pulls me several times around my prison, and ends by hurling me against the wall in such a manner I am nigh to having my brains dashed out.

"You deserve to have me open your four veins this instant," says he as he closes the door, "and if I postpone your death, be very sure it is only in order to render it the more horrible."

He has left; I am in a state of the most violent agitation; I shall not describe the night I passed: my tormented imagination together with the physical hurt done me by the monster's initial cruelties made it one of the most dreadful I had ever gone through. One has no conception of what anguish is suffered by the wretch who from hour to hour awaits his ordeal, from whom hope has fled, and who knows not whether this breath he draws may not be his last. Uncertain of the torture, he pictures it in a thousand forms, one more frightful than the other; the least noise he hears may be that of his approaching assassins; the blood freezes in his veins, his heart grows faint, and the blade which is to put a period to his days is less cruel than those terrible instants swollen with the menace of death.

In all likelihood the Count began by revenging himself upon his wife: you will be as convinced of it as I by the event which saved me. For thirty-six hours I lingered in the critical condition I have just described; during that time I was brought no relief; and then my door was opened and the Count appeared: he was alone, fury glittered in his eyes.

"You must be fully cognizant of the death you are going to undergo: this perverse blood has got to be made to seep out of you: you will be bled three times a day, I want to see how long you can survive the treatment. 'Tis an experiment I have been all afire to make, you know; my thanks to you for furnishing me the means."

And, for the time being occupying himself with no passion but his vengeance, the monster made me stretch forth an arm, pricked it and stopped the wound after he had drawn two bowls of blood. He had scarcely finished when cries were heard.

"Oh, my Lord, my Lord !" exclaimed one of the servants who came running up to him, "come as quick as ever you can, Madame is dying, she wishes to speak to you before she gives up her soul."

And the old woman turned and flew back to her mistress.

However habituated one may be to crime, it is rarely that news of its accomplishment does not strike terror into him who has committed it; this fear avenges Virtue: Virtue resumes possession of its rights: Gernande goes out in alarm, he forgets to secure the dungeon's doors; although enfeebled by a forty hours' fast and the blood I have lost, I exploit my opportunity, leap from my cell, find my way unimpeded, traverse the court, the park, and reach the forest without having been perceived. Walk, I say to myself, walk, walk, be courageous; if the mighty scorn the weak, there is an omnipotent God Who shields the latter and Who never abandons them. My head crowded with these ideas, I advance with a stout heart and before night closes I find myself in a cottage four leagues from the chateau. Some money remained to me, my needs were attended to, in a few hours I was rested. I left at daybreak and, renouncing all plans to register old or new complaints with the authorities, I asked to be directed toward Lyon; the road was pointed out to me and on the eighth day I reached that city, very weak, suffering much, but happy and unpursued; once arrived, I turned all my thoughts to recovery before striking out for Grenoble where, according to one of my persistent notions, happiness awaited me.

One day my eye fell upon a gazette printed in some distant place; what was my surprise to behold crime crowned once again and to see one of the principal authors of my miseries arrived at the pinnacle of success. Rodin, the surgeon of Saint-Michel, that infamous wretch who had punished me with such cruelty for having wished to spare him the murder of his daughter, had just, the news-paper declared, been named First Surgeon to the Empress of Russia with the considerable emoluments accompanying that post. May he prosper, the villain, I muttered to myself, may he be so whilst Providence so wills it; and thou, unhappy creature, suffer, suffer uncomplainingly, since it is decreed that tribulations and pain must be Virtue's frightful share; no matter, I shall never lose my taste for it.

But I was far from done with these striking examples of the triumph of vice, examples so disheartening for Virtue, and the flourishing condition of the personage whose acquaintance I was about to renew was surely to exasperate and amaze me more than any other, since it was that of one of the men at whose hands I had endured the bloodiest outrages. I was exclusively busied with preparing my departure when one evening a lackey clad in gray and completely unknown to me brought me a note; upon presenting it, he said his master had charged him to obtain my response without fail. The missive was worded this way: "A man who has somewhat wronged you, who believes he recognized you in the Place de Belle-cour, is most desirous to see you and to make amends for his conduct: hasten to come to meet him; he has things to tell you which may help liquidate his entire indebtedness to you."

The message carried no signature and the lackey offered no explanations. Having declared I was resolved to make no answer at all lest I was informed of who his master was:

"He is Monsieur de Saint-Florent, Mademoiselle," the lackey said; "he has had the honor to know you formerly in the neighbor-hood of Paris; you rendered him, he maintains, services for which he burns to attest his gratitude. Presently risen to a position of undisputed eminence in this city's commercial circles, he at once enjoys the consideration and the means which put him in a position to prove his regard for you. He awaits you."

My deliberations were soon completed. If this man had other than good intentions, I said to myself, would he be apt to write to me, to have me spoken to in this fashion? He repented his past infamies, was covered with remorse, it was with horror he remembered having torn from me what I cherished most and, by inaugurating a sequence of nightmares, having reduced me to the cruelest circumstances a woman may know... yes, yes, no doubt of it, this is repentance, I should be culpable before the Supreme Being were I not to consent to assuage his sufferings. Am I in a position, furthermore, to spurn the support that is proposed here? Rather, ought I not eagerly snatch at all that is offered to relieve me? This man wishes to see me in his town house: his prosperity must surround him with servants before whom he will have to act with enough dignity to prevent him from daring to fail me again, and in my state, Great God! can I inspire anything but sympathy in him? Therefore I assured Saint-Florent's lackey that upon the morrow at eleven o'clock I would take the privilege of going to salute his master; that I congratulated him upon his good fortune, and added that luck had treated me in nothing approaching the same manner.

I returned to my room, but I was so preoccupied with what this man might wish to say to me that I slept not a wink all night; the next day I arrived at the indicated address: a superb mansion, a throng of domestics, that insolent canaille's contemptuous glances at the poverty it scorned, everything afflicts me and I am about ready to retreat when up comes the same liveryman who had spoken to me the previous evening, and, reassuring me, he conducts me into a sumptuous drawing room where, although it is nine years since I have set eyes on him, I perfectly recognize my butcher who has now reached the age of forty-five. He does not rise upon my entrance, but gives the order we be left alone, and gestures me to come and seat myself near the vast armchair where he is enthroned.

"I wanted to see you again, my child," says he with a humiliating tone of superiority, "not that I thought I had much wronged you, not that a troublesome recollection bids me make restitutions from which I believe my position exempts me; but I remember that, however brief was our acquaintance, you exhibited some parts during it: wit and character are needed for what I have to propose to you and if you accept, the need I will then have of you will insure your discovery of the resources which are necessary to you, and upon which it should be in vain you were to count without signifying your agreement."

I wished to reply with some reproaches for the levity of this beginning, but Saint-Florent imposed silence upon me.

" 'Tis water under the bridge," says he, "a purely emotional episode, and my principles support the belief I have, that no brake should be applied to passion; when the appetites speak, they must be heard: that's my law. When I was captured by the thieves with whom you were, did you see me burst into tears? Swallow the bitter pill and act with diligence if one is weak, enjoy all one's rights if powerful: that's my doctrine. You were young and pretty, Therese, we found ourselves in the middle of a forest, nothing so arouses me sensually as the rape of a young virgin girl; such you were, I raped you; I might perhaps have done worse had what I attempted not met with success and had you put up any resistance. But I raped you, then left you naked and robbed in the middle of the night, upon a perilous road: two motives gave rise to that further villainy: I needed money and had none; as for the other reason which drove me to do this, 'twould be in vain were I to explain it, Therese, it would surpass your understanding. Only those spirits who are deep-learned in the heart of man, who have studied its innermost recesses, gained access to the most impenetrable nooks of this dim-lit labyrinth, they alone might be able to account for this consequence of an aberration."

"What, Monsieur! the money I gave you... the service I had just rendered you... to be paid for what I did in your behalf by the blackest treachery... that may, you think, be understood, justified ?"

"Why yes, Therese! yes indeed! the proof an explanation exists for all I did is that, having just pillaged you, molested you... (for, Therese, I did beat you, you know), why! having taken twenty steps, I stopped and, meditating upon the state in which I had left you, I at once found strength in these ideas, enough to perpetrate additional outrages I might not have committed had it not been for that: you had lost but one maidenhead.... I turned, retraced my steps, and made short work of the other.... And so it is true that in certain souls lust may be born from the womb of crime! What do I say? it is thus true that only crime awakes and stiffens lust and that there is not a single voluptuous pleasure it does not inflame and improve...."

"Oh Monsieur! what horror is this?"

"Could I not have acquitted myself of a still greater? I was close enough to it, I confess, but I was amply sure you were going to be reduced to the last extremities: the thought satisfied me, I left you. Well, Therese, let's leave the subject and continue to my reason for desiring to see you. "My incredible appetite for both of a little girl's maidenheads has not deserted me, Therese," Saint-Florent pursued; "with this it is as with all libertinage's other extravagances: the older you grow, the more deeply they take root; from former misdeeds fresh desires are born, and new crimes from these desires. There would be nothing to the matter, my dear, were not the means one employs to succeed exceedingly culpable. But as the desire of evil is the primum mobile of our caprices, the more criminal the thing we are led to do, the better our irritation. When one arrives at this stage, one merely complains of the mediocrity of the means: the more encompassing their atrociousness, the more piquant our joy becomes, and thus one sinks in the quagmire without the slightest desire to emerge.

"That, Therese, is my own history: two young children are necessary for my daily sacrifices; having once enjoyed them, - not only do I never again set eyes upon these objects, but it even becomes essential to my fantasies' entire satisfaction that they instantly leave the city: I should not at all savor the following day's pleasures were I to imagine that yesterday's victims still breathed the same air I inhale; the method for being rid of them is not complicated. Would you believe it, Therese? They are my debauches which populate Languedoc and Provence with the multitude of objects of libertinage with which those regions are teeming:

 

(Let this not be mistaken for a fable: this wretched figure existed in this same Lyon. What is herein related of his maneuvers is exact and authentic: he cost the honor of between fifteen and twenty thousand unhappy little creatures: upon the completion of each operation, the victim was embarked on the Rhone, and for thirty years the above-mentioned cities were peopled with the objects of this villain's debauchery, with girls undone by him. There is nothing fictitious about this episode but the gentleman's name.)

...one hour after these little girls have served me, reliable emissaries pack them off and sell them to the matchmakers of Montpellier, Toulouse, Nimes, Aix, and Marseilles: this trade, two-thirds of whose net profits go to me, amply recompenses the outlay required to procure my subjects, and thus I satisfy two of my most cherished passions, lust and greed; but reconnoitering and seduction are bothersome. Furthermore, the kind of subject is of infinite importance to my lubricity: I must have them all procured from those asylums of misery where the need to live and the impossibility of managing to do so eat away courage, pride, delicacy, finally rot the soul, and, in the hope of an indispensable subsistence, steel a person to undertake whatever appears likely to provide it. I have all these nests ransacked, all these dungheaps combed pitilessly: you've no idea what they yield; I would even go further, Therese: I say that civil activity, industry, a little social ease would defeat my subornations and divest me of a great proportion of my subjects: I combat these perils with the influence I enjoy in this city, I promote commercial and economic fluctuations or instigate the rise of prices which, enlarging the poverty-stricken class, depriving it, on the one hand, of possibilities of work and on the other rendering difficult those of survival, increases according to a predictable ratio the total number of the subjects misery puts into my clutches. The strategy is a familiar one, Therese: these scarcities of firewood, dearths of wheat and of other edibles where-from Paris has been trembling for so many years, have been created for the identical purposes which animate me: avarice, libertinage: such are the passions which, from the gilded halls of the rich, extend a multitude of nets to ensnare the poor in their humble dwellings. But whatever skill I employ to press hard in this sector, if dexterous hands do not pluck nimbly in another, I get nothing for my troubles, and the machine goes quite as badly as if I were to cease to exhaust my imagination in devising and my credit in operating. And so I need a clever woman, young and intelligent, who, having herself found her way through misery's thorny pathways, is more familiar than anyone else with the methods for debauching those who are in the toils; a woman whose keen eyes will descry adversity in its darkest caves and attics, whose suborning intelligence will determine destitution's victims to extricate themselves from oppression by the means I make available; a spirited woman, in a word, unscrupulous and ruthless, who will stop at nothing in order to succeed, who will even go to the point of cutting away the scanty reserves which, still bolstering up those wretches' hopes, inhibit them from taking the final step. I had an excellent woman and trustworthy, she has just died: it cannot be imagined to what lengths that brilliant creature carried effrontery; not only did she use to isolate these wretches until they would be forced to come begging on their knees, but if these devices did not succeed in accelerating their fall, the impatient villain would hasten matters by kidnaping them. She was a treasure; I need but two subjects a day, she would have got me ten had I wanted them. The result was I used to be able to make better selections, and the superabundance of raw material consumed by my operations reimbursed me for inflated labor costs. That's the woman I have got to replace, my dear, you'll have four people under your command and ten thousand crowns wages for your trouble; I have had my say, Therese; give me your answer, and above all do not let your illusions prevent you from accepting happiness when chance and my hand offer it to you."

 

32.

 

"Oh Monsieur," I say to this dishonest man, shuddering at his speech, "is it possible you have been able to conceive such joys and that you dare propose that I serve them? What horrors you have just uttered in my hearing! Cruel man, were you to be miserable for but two days, you would see these doctrines upon humanity swiftly obliterated from your heart: it is prosperity blinds and hardens you: mightily blase you are before the spectacle of the evils whence you suppose yourself sheltered, and because you hope never to suffer them, you consider you have the right to inflict them; may happiness never come nigh unto me if it can produce this degree of corruption! O Just Heaven! not merely to be content to abuse the misfortunate! To drive audacity and ferocity to the point of increasing it, of prolonging it for the unique gratification of one's desires! What cruelty, Monsieur! the wildest animals do not give us the example of a comparable barbarity."

"You are mistaken, Therese, there is no roguery the wolf will not invent to draw the lamb into his clutches: these are natural ruses, while benevolence has nothing to do with Nature: charity is but an appurtenance of the weakness recommended by the slave who would propitiate his master and dispose him to leniency; it never proclaimed itself in man save in two cases: in the event he is weak, or in the event he fears he will become weak; that this alleged virtue is not natural is proven by the fact it is unknown to the man who lives in a state of Nature. The savage expresses his contempt for charity when pitilessly he massacres his brethren from motives of either revenge or cupidity... would he not respect that virtue were it etched in his heart? but never does it appear there, never will it be found wherever men are equal. Civilization, by weeding certain individuals out of society, by establishing rank and class, by giving the rich man a glimpse of the poor, by making the former dread any change of circumstances which might precipitate him into the latter's misery, civilization immediately puts the desire into his head to relieve the poor in order that he may be helped in his turn should he chance to lose his wealth; and thus was benevolence born, the fruit of civilization and fear: hence it is merely a circumstantial virtue, but nowise a sentiment originating in Nature, who never inserted any other desire in us but that of satisfying ourselves at no matter what the price. It is thus by confounding every sentiment, it is by continually refusing to analyze a single one of them that these people are able to linger in total darkness about them all and deprive themselves of every pleasurable enjoyment."

"Ah, Monsieur," I interrupted with great emotion, "may there be one any sweeter than the succoring of misfortune? Leaving aside the dread lest someday one have to endure suffering oneself, is there any more substantial satisfaction than that to be had from obliging others?... from relishing gratitude's tearful thanks, from partaking of the well-being you have just distributed like manna to the downtrodden who, your own fellow creatures, nevertheless want those things which you take airily for granted; oh! to hear them sing your praise and call you their father, to restore serenity to brows clouded by failure, destitution, and despair; no, Monsieur, not one of this world's lewd pleasures can equal this: it is that of the Divinity Himself, and the happiness He promises to those who on earth will serve Him, is naught other than the possibility to behold or make happy creatures in Heaven. All virtues stem directly from that one, Monsieur; one is a better father, a better son, a better husband when one knows the charm of alleviating misfortune's lot. One might say that like unto the sun's rays, the charitable man's presence sheds fertility, sweetness, and joy everywhere about and upon all, and the miracle of Nature, after this source of celestial light, is the honest, delicate, and sensitive soul whose supreme felicity consists in laboring in behalf of that of others."

"Feeble Phoebus stuff, Therese," Saint-Florent smiled; "the character of man's enjoyment is determined by the kind of organs he has received from Nature; a weak individual's, and hence every woman's, incline in the direction of procuring moral ecstasies which are more keenly felt than any other by these persons whose physical constitution happens to be entirely devoid of energy; quite the opposite is the case for vigorous spirits who are far more delighted by powerful shocks imparted to what surround them than they would be by the delicate impressions the feeble creatures by whom they are surrounded inevitably prefer, as befits their constitution; similarly the vigorous spirits delight more in what affects others painfully than in what affects them agreeably: such is the only difference between the cruel and the meek; both groups are endowed with sensibility, but each is endowed with it in a special manner. I do not deny that each class knows its pleasures, but I, together with a host of philosophers, maintain of course that those of the individual constructed in the more vigorous fashion are incontestably more lively than all his adversary's; and, these axioms established, there may and

there must be men of one sort who take as much joy in everything cruelty suggests, as the other category of persons tastes delight in benevolence; but the pleasures of the latter will be mild, those of the former keen and strong: these will be the most sure, the most reliable, and doubtless the most authentic, since they characterize the penchants of every man who is still a creature of Nature, and indeed of all children before they have fallen under the sway of civilization; the others will merely be the eff civilization and, consequently, of deceiving and vapid delights. Well, my child, since we are met not so much in order to philosophize as to conclude a bargain, be so kind as to give me your final decision... do you or do you not accept the post I propose to you ?"

"I very decidedly reject it, Monsieur," I replied, getting to my feet, "... indeed I am poor... oh yes! very poor, Monsieur; but richer in my heart's sentiments than I could be in all fortune's blessings; never will I sacrifice the one in order to possess the other; I may die in indigence, but I will not betray Virtue."

"Get out," the detestable man said to me, "and, above all, should I have anything to fear from your indiscretion, you will be promptly conveyed to a place where I need dread it no longer."

Nothing heartens Virtue like the fear of vice; a good deal less timorous than I should have thought, I dared, upon promising he would have nothing to dread at my hands, remind him of what he had from me in the forest of Bondy and apprise him of my present circumstances which, I said, made this money indispensable to me. The monster gave me harsh answer, declaring it was up to me to earn it and that I had refused.

"No Monsieur, no," I replied firmly, "no, I repeat, I would rather perish a thousand times over than preserve my life at that price."

"And as for myself," Saint-Florent rejoined, "there is in the same way nothing I would not prefer to the chagrin of disbursing unearned money: despite the refusal you have the insolence to give me, I should relish passing another fifteen minutes in your company; and so if you please, we will move into my boudoir and a few moments of obedience will go far to straighten out your pecuniary difficulties."

"I am no more eager to serve your debauches in one sense than in another, Monsieur," I proudly retorted; "it is not charity I ask, cruel man; no, I should not procure you the pleasure of it; what I demand is simply most infamous manner.... Keep it, cruel wretch, keep it if you see fit: unpityingly observe my tears; hear, if you are able, hear without emotion need's sorrowing accents, but bear in mind that if you commit this newest outrage, I will have bought, for the price it costs me, the right to scorn you forever."

Furious, Saint-Florent ordered me to leave and I was able to read in his dreadful countenance that, had it not been for what he had confided in me and were he not afraid lest it get abroad, my bold plain speaking might perhaps have been repaid by some brutality.... I left. At the same instant they were bringing the debauchee one of the luckless victims of his sordid profligacy. One of those women whose horrible state he had suggested I share was leading into the house a poor little girl of about nine who displayed every attribute of wretchedness and dereliction: she scarcely seemed to have enough strength to keep er is it conceivable that such objects can inspire any feelings but those of pity? Woe unto the depraved one who will be able to suspect pleasures in the womb want consumes, who will seek to gather kisses from lips withered by hunger and which open only to curse him!

Tears spilled from my eyes; I should have liked to snatch that victim from the tiger awaiting her; I dared not. Could I have done it? I returned directly to my hotel, quite as humiliated by the misfortune which attracted such proposals as revolted by the opulence which ventured to make them.

The following day I left Lyon by way of the road to Dauphine, still filled with the mad faith which allowed me to believe happiness awaited me in that province. Traveling afoot as usual, with a pair of blouses and some handkerchiefs in my pockets, I had not proceeded two leagues when I met an old woman; she approached me with a look of suffering and implored alms. Far from I had just received such cruel examples, and knowing no greater worldly happiness than what comes of obliging a poor person, I instantly drew forth my purse with the intention of selecting a crown and giving it to this woman; but the unworthy creature, much quicker than I, although I had at first judged her aged and crippled, leaps nimbly at my purse, seizes it, aims a powerful blow of her fist at my stomach, topples me, and the next I see of her, she has put a hundred yards betwixt us; there she is, surrounded by four rascals who gesture threateningly and warn me not to come near.

"Great God!" I cried with much bitterness, "then it is Impossible for my soul to give vent to any virtuous impulse without my being instantly and very severely punished for it!" At this fatal moment all my courage deserted me; today I beg Heaven's forgiveness in all sincerity, for I faltered; but I was blinded by despair. I felt myself ready to give up a career bese two alternatives: that of going to join the scoundrels who had just robbed me, or that of returning to Lyon to accept Saint-Florent's offer. God had mercy upon me; I did not succumb, and though the fresh hope He quickened in me was misleading, since so many adversities yet lay in store for me, I nevertheless thank Him for having held me upright: the unlucky star which guides me, although innocent, to the gallows, will never lead me to worse than death; other supervision might have brought me to infamy, and the one is far less cruel than the other.

I continue to direct my steps toward Vienne, having decided to sell what remains to me in order to get on to Grenoble: I was walking along sadly when, at a quarter league's distance from this city, I spied a plain to the right of the highway, and in the fields were two riders busily trampling a man beneath their horses' hooves; after having left him for dead, the pair rode off at a gallop. Th an unluckier person than I; health and strength at least remain to me, I can earn my living, and if that poor fellow is not rich, what is to become of him ?"

However much I ought to have forbidden myself the self-indulgence of sympathy, however perilous it was for me to surrender to the impulse, I could not vanquish my extreme desire to approach the man and to lavish upon him what care I could offer. I rush to his side, I aid him to inhale some spirits I had kept about me: at last he opens his eyes and his first accents are those of gratitude. Still more eager to be of use to him, I tear up one of my blouses in order to bandage his wounds, to stanch his blood: I sacrificed for this wretched man one of the few belongings I still owned. These first attentions completed, I give him a little wine to drink: the unlucky one has completely come back to his senses, I cast an eye upon him a him more closely. Although traveling on foot and without baggage, he had some valuable effects Ä rings, a watch, a snuff box Ä but the latter two have been badly damaged during his encounter. As soon as he is able to speak he asks me what angel of charity has come to his rescue and what he can do to express his gratitude. Still having the simplicity to believe that a soul enchained by indebtedness ought to be eternally beholden to me, I judge it safe to enjoy the sweet pleasure of sharing my tears with him who has just shed some in my arms: I instruct him of my numerous reverses, he listens with interest, and when I have concluded with the latest catastrophe that has befallen me, the recital provides him with a glimpse of my poverty.

"How happy I am," he exclaims, "to be able at least to acknowledge all you have just done for me; my name is Roland," the adventurer continues, "I am the owner of an exceedingly fine chateau in the mountains fifteen leagues hence, I that this proposal cause your delicacy no alarm, I am going to explain immediately in what way you will be of service to me. I am unwedded, but I have a sister I love passionately: she has dedicated herself to sharing my solitude; I need someone to wait upon her; we have recently lost the person who held that office until now, I offer her post to you."

I thanked my protector and took the liberty to ask him how it chanced that a man such as he exposed himself to the dangers of journeying alone, and, as had just occurred, to being molested by bandits.

"A stout, youthful, and vigorous fellow, for several years," said Roland, "I have been in the habit of traveling this way between the place where I reside and Vienne. My health and pocketbook benefit from walking. It is not that I need avoid the expense of a coach, for I am wealthy, and you will soon see proof of it if you are good enough to return home with me; but thriftiness never hurts. men who insulted me a short while ago, they are two would-be gentlemen of this canton from whom I won a hundred louis last week in a gaming house at Vienne; I was content to accept their word of honor, then I met them today, asked for what they owe me, and you witnessed in what coin they paid me."

Together with this man I was deploring the double misfortune of which he was the victim when he proposed we continue our way.

"Thanks to your attentions I feel a little better," said Roland; "night is approaching, let's get on to a house which should be two leagues away; by means of the horses we will secure tomorrow, we might be able to arrive at my chateau the same afternoon."

Absolutely resolved to profit from the aid Heaven seemed to have sent me, I help Roland to get up, I give him my arm while we walk, and indeed, after progressing two leagues we find the inn he had mentioned. We take supper together, 'tis very proper and nice; after our meal Roland en following day we set off on two mules we have rented and which are led by a boy from the inn; we reach the frontier of Dauphine, ever heading into the highlands. We were not yet at our destination when the day ended, so we stopped at Virieu, where my patron showed me the same consideration and provided me with the same care; the next morning we resumed our way toward the mountains. We arrived at their foot toward four in the afternoon; there, the road becoming almost impassable, Roland requested my muleteer not to leave me for fear of an accident, and we penetrated into the gorges. We did but turn, wind, climb for the space of more than four leagues, and by then we had left all habitations and all traveled roads so far behind us I thought myself come to the end of the world; despite myself, I was seized by a twinge of uneasiness; Roland could not avoid seeing it, but he said nothing, and I was made yet more uncomfortable by his to a castle perched upon the crest of a mountain; it beetled over a dreadful precipice into which it seemed ready to plunge: no road seemed to lead up to it; the one we had followed, frequently by goats only, strewn with pebbles and stones, however did at last take us to this awful eyrie which much more resembled the hideaway of thieves than the dwelling place of virtuous folk.

"That is where I live," said Roland, noticing I was gazing up at his castle.

I confessed my astonishment to see that he lived in such isolation.

"It suits me," was his abrupt reply.

This response redoubled my forebodings. Not a syllable is lost upon the miserable; a word, a shift of inflection and, when 'tis a question of the speech of the person upon whom one depends, 'tis enough to stifle hope or revive it; but, being completely unable to do anything, I held my tongue and waited. We mounted by zigzags; the strange pile suddenly loomed up before us: roughly a quart separated it from us: Roland dismounted and having told me to do likewise, he returned both mules to the boy, paid him and ordered him to return. This latest maneuver was even more displeasing to me; Roland observed my anxiety.

"What is the trouble, Therese?" he demanded, urging me on toward his fortress; "you are not out of France; we are on the Dauphine border and within the bishopric of Grenoble."

"Very well, Monsieur," I answered; "but why did it ever occur to you to take up your abode in a place befitting brigands and robbers ?"

"Because they who inhabit it are not very honest people," said Roland; "it might be altogether possible you will not be edified by their conduct."

"Ah, Monsieur I" said I with a shudder, "you make me tremble; where then are you leading me ?"

"I am leading you into the service of the counterfeiters of whom I am the chief," said Roland, grasping my arm and driving me over a little drawbridge that was lowered at our immediately we had traversed it; "do you see that well?" he continued when we had entered; he was pointing to a large and deep grotto situated toward the back of the courtyard, where four women, nude and manacled, were turning a wheel; "there are your companions and there your task, which involves the rotation of that wheel for ten hours each day, and which also involves the satisfaction of all the caprices I am pleased to submit you and the other ladies to; for which you will be granted six ounces of black bread and a plate of kidney beans without fail each day; as for your freedom, forget it; you will never recover it. When you are dead from overwork, you will be flung into that hole you notice beside the well, where the remains of between sixty and eighty other rascals of your breed await yours, and your place will be taken by somebody else."

"Oh, Great God!" I exclaimed, casting myself at Roland's feet, "deign to remember, Monsieur, that I saved you gratitude for an instant, you seemed to offer me happiness and that it is by precipitating me into an eternal abyss of evils you reward my services. Is what you are doing just? and has not remorse already begun to avenge me in the depths of your heart?"

"What, pray tell, do you mean by this feeling of gratitude with which you fancy you have captivated me?" Roland inquired. "Be more reasonable, wretched creature; what were you doing when you came to my rescue? Between the two possibilities, of continuing on your way and of coming up to me, did you not choose the latter as an impulse dictated by your heart? You therefore gave yourself up to a pleasure? How in the devil's name can you maintain I am obliged to recompense you for the joys in which you indulge yourself? And how did you ever get it into your head that a man like myself, who is swimming in gold and opulence, should condescend to lower himself to owing something to a wretch of your species? you nothing immediately it were plain you had acted out of selfishness only: to work, slave, to work; learn that though civilization may overthrow the principles of Nature, it cannot however divest her of her rights; in the beginning she wrought strong beings and weak and intended that the lowly should be forever subordinated to the great; human skill and intelligence made various the positions of individuals, it was no longer physical force alone that determined rank, 'twas gold; the richest became the mightiest man, the most penurious the weakest; if the causes which establish power are not to be found in Nature's ordinations, the priority of the mighty has always been inscribed therein, and to Nature it made no difference whether the weak danced at the end of a leash held by the richest or the most energetic, and little she cared whether the yoke crushed the poorest or the most enfeebled; but these grateful impulses out of which you them not; it has never been one of her laws that the pleasure whereunto someone surrenders when he acts obligingly must become a cause for the recipient of his gratuitous kindness to renounce his rights over the donor; do you detect these sentiments you demand in the animals which serve us as examples? When I dominate you by my wealth or might is it natural for me to abandon my rights to you, either because you have enjoyed yourself while obliging me or because, being unhappy, you fancied you had something to gain from your action? Even were service to be rendered by one equal to another, never would a lofty spirit's pride allow him to stoop to acknowledge it; is not he who receives always humiliated? And is this humiliation not sufficient payment for the benefactor who, by this alone, finds himself superior to the other? Is it not pride's delight to be raised above one's fellow? Is any other necessary to the person wh obligation, by causing humiliation to him who receives, becomes a burden to him, by what right is he to be forced to continue to shoulder it? Why must I consent to let myself be humiliated every time my eyes fall upon him who has obliged me? Instead of being a vice, ingratitude is as certainly a virtue in proud spirits as gratitude is one in humble; let them do what they will for me if doing it gives them pleasure, but let them expect nothing from me simply because they have enjoyed themselves."

 

33.

 

Having uttered these words, to which Roland gave me no opportunity to reply, he summoned two valets who upon his instructions seized me, despoiled me, and shackled me next to my companions, so was I set to work at once, without a moment's rest after the fatiguing journey I had just made. Then Roland approaches me, he brutally handles all those parts of me designation of which modesty forbids, heaps sarcasms upon me, makes impertinent reference to the damning a brand Rodin printed upon me, then, catching up a bull's pizzle always kept in readiness nearby, he applies twenty cuts to my behind.

"That is how you will be treated, bitch," says he, "when you lag at the job; I'm not giving you this for anything you've already done, but only to show you how I cope with those who make mistakes."

I screamed, struggled against my manacles; my contortions, my cries, my tears, the cruel expressions of my pain merely entertained my executioner....

"Oh, little whore, you'll see other things," says Roland, "you're not by a long shot at the end of your troubles - and I want you to make the acquaintance of even the most barbaric refinements of misery."

He leaves me.

Located in a cave on the edge of that vast well were six dark kennels; they were barred like dungeons, and they served us as shelters for the night, which arrived not long after I was enlisted in this dreadful chain gang. They came to remove my fetters and my

and dry bread Roland had mentioned, we were locked up.

I was no sooner alone than, undistracted, I abandoned myself to contemplating my situation in all its horror. Is it possible, I wondered, can it be that there are men so hardened as to have stifled in themselves their capacity for gratitude? This virtue to which I surrender myself with such charm whenever an upright spirit gives me the chance to feel it... can this virtue be unknown to certain beings, can they be utter strangers to it? and may they who have suppressed it so inhumanly in themselves be anything but monsters ?

I was absorbed in these musings when suddenly I heard the door to my cell open; 'tis Roland: the villain has come to complete his outraging of me by making me serve his odious eccentricities: you may well imagine, Madame, that they were to be as ferocious as his other proceedings and that such a man's love-makings are necessarily by his abhorrent character. But how can I abuse your patience by relating these new horrors? Have I not already more than soiled your imagination with infamous recitations ? Dare I hazard additional ones?

"Yes, Therese," Monsieur de Corville put in, "yes, we insist upon these details, you veil them with a decency that removes all their edge of horror; there remains only what is useful to whoever seeks to perfect his understanding of enigmatic man. You may not fully apprehend how these tableaux help toward the development of the human spirit; our backwardness in this branch of learning may very well be due to the stupid restraint of those who venture to write upon such matters. Inhibited by absurd fears, they only discuss the puerilities with which every fool is familiar, and dare not, by addressing themselves boldly to the investigation of the human heart, offer its gigantic idiosyncrasies to our view."

"Very well, Monsieur, I shall proceed," Therese resumed, affected, "and proceeding as I have done until this point, I will strive to offer my sketches in the least revolting colors."

Roland, with whose portrait I ought to begin, was a short, heavy-set man, thirty-five years old, incredibly vigorous and as hirsute as a bear, with a glowering mien and fierce eye; very dark, with masculine features, a long nose, bearded to the eyes, black, shaggy brows; and in him that part which differentiates men from our sex was of such length and exorbitant circumference, that not only had I never laid eyes upon anything comparable, but was even absolutely convinced Nature had never fashioned another as prodigious; I could scarcely surround it with both hands, and its length matched that of my forearm. To this physique Roland joined all the vices which may be the issue of a fiery temperament, of considerable imagination, and of a luxurious life undisturbed by anything likely to distract from one's leisure pursuits. From his father Roland very early on in life he had become surfeited by ordinary pleasures, and begun to resort to nothing but horrors; these alone were able to revive desires in a person jaded by excessive pleasure; the women who served him were all employed in his secret debauches and to satisfy appetites only slightly less dishonest within which, nevertheless, this libertine was able to find the criminal spice wherein above all his taste delighted; Roland kept his own sister as a mistress, and it was with her he brought to a climax the passions he ignited in our company.

He was virtually naked when he entered; his inflamed visage was evidence simultaneously of the epicurean intemperance to which he had just given himself over, and the abominable lust which consumed him; for an instant he considers me with eyes that unstring my limbs.

"Get out of those clothes," says he, himself tearing off what I was wearing to cover me during the night... "yes, get rid of all that an follow me; a little while ago I made you sense what you risk by laziness; but should you desire to betray us, as that crime would be of greater magnitude, its punishment would have to be proportionally heavier; come along and see of what sort it would be."

I was in a state difficult to describe, but Roland, affording my spirit no time in which to burst forth, immediately grasped my arm and dragged me out; he pulls me along with his right hand, in his left he holds a little lantern that emits a feeble light; after winding this way and that, we reach a cellar door; he opens it, thrusts me ahead of him, tells me to descend while he closes this first barrier; I obey; a hundred paces further, a second door; he opens and shuts it in the same way; but after this one there is no stairway, only a narrow passage hewn in the rock, filled with sinuosities, whose downward slope is extremely abrupt. Not a word from Roland; the silence affrights me still more; he lights us along with his travel for about fifteen minutes; my frame of mind makes me yet more sensitive to these subterranean passages' terrible humidity. At last, we had descended to such a depth that it is without fear of exaggeration I assure you the place at which we were to arrive must have been more than a furlong below the surface of the earth; on either side of the path we followed were occasional niches where I saw coffers containing those criminals' wealth: one last bronze door appeared, Roland unlocked it, and I nearly fell backward upon perceiving the dreadful place to which this evil man had brought me. Seeing me falter, he pushed me rudely ahead, and thus, without wishing to be there, I found myself in the middle of that appalling sepulcher. Imagine, Madame, a circular cavern, twenty-five feet in diameter, whose walls, hung in black, were decorated by none but the most lugubrious objects, skeletons of all sizes, crossed bones, several heads, bundles of whips and collecti cutlasses, poignards, firearms: such were the horrors one spied on the walls illuminated by a three-wicked oil lamp suspended in one corner of the vault; from a transverse beam dangled a rope which fell to within eight or ten feet of the ground in the center of this dungeon and which, as very soon you will see, was there for no other purpose than to facilitate dreadful expeditions: to the right was an open coffin wherein glinted an effigy of death brandishing a threatful scythe; a prayer stool was beside it; above it was visible a crucifix bracketed by candles of jet; to the left, the waxen dummy of a naked woman, so lifelike I was for a long time deceived by it; she was attached to a cross, posed with her chest facing it so that one had a full view of her posterior and cruelly molested parts; blood seemed to ooze from several wounds and to flow down her thighs; she had the most beautiful hair in all the world, her lovely head was turned toward us and plainly wrought upon her lovely face, and there were even tears flowing down her cheeks: the sight of this terrible image was again enough to make me think I would collapse; the further part of the cavern was filled by a vast black divan which eloquently bespoke all the atrocities which occurred in this infernal place.

"And here is where you will perish, Therese," quoth Roland, "if ever you conceive the fatal notion of leaving my establishment; yes, it is here I will myself put you to death, here I will make you reverberate to the anguishes inflicted by everything of the most appalling I can possibly devise."

As he gave vent to this threat Roland became aroused; his agitation, his disorder made him resemble a tiger about to spring upon its prey: 'twas then he brought to light the formidable member wherewith he was outfitted; he had me touch it, asked me whether I had ever beheld its peer.

"Such as you see has, however, got to be introduced into the narrowest part of your body even if I must split you in half; my sister, considerably your junior, manages it in the same sector; never do I enjoy women in any other fashion," and so as to leave me in no doubt of the locale he had in mind, he inserted into it three fingers armed with exceedingly long nails, the while saying:

"Yes, 'tis there, Therese, it will be shortly into this hole I will drive this member which affrights you; it will be run every inch of the way in, it will tear you, you'll bleed and I will be beside myself."

Foam flecked his lips as he spoke these words interspersed with revolting oaths and blasphemies. The hand, which had been prying open the shrine he seemed to want to attack, now strayed over all the adjacent parts; he scratched them, he did as much to my breast, he clawed me so badly I was not to get over the pain for a fortnight. Next, he placed me on t mossy tonsure with which Nature ornaments the altar wherein our species finds regeneration; he set it afire and burned it. His fingers closed upon the fleshy protuberance which surmounts this same altar, he snatched at it and scraped roughly, then he inserted his fingers within and his nails ripped the membrane which lines it. Losing all control over himself, he told me that, since he had me in his lair, I might just as well not leave it, for that would spare him the nuisance of bringing me back down again; I fell to my knees and dared remind him again of what I had done in his behalf.... I observed I but further excited him by harping again upon the rights to his pity I fancied were mine; he told me to be silent, bringing up his knee and giving me a tremendous blow in the pit of the stomach which sent me sprawling on the flagstones. He seized a handful of my hair and jerked me erect.

"Very well!" he said, "come now! prepare yourself; it is a certainty, I am going to kill you...."

"Oh, Monsieur!"

"No, no, you've got to die; I do not want to hear you reproach me with your good little deeds; I don't like owing anything to anybody, others have got to rely upon me for everything.... You're going to perish, I tell you, get into that coffin, let's see if it fits."

He lifts me, thrusts me into it and shuts it, then quits the cavern and gives me the impression I have been left there. Never had I thought myself so near to death; alas! it was nonetheless to be presented to me under a yet more real aspect. Roland returns, he fetches me out of the coffin.

"You'll be well off in there," says he, "one would say 'twas made for you; but to let you finish peacefully in that box would be a death too sweet; I'm going to expose you to one of a different variety which, all the same, will have its agreeable qualities; so implore your God, whore, pray to him to come posthaste and avenge you if h really has it in him...."

I cast myself down upon the prie-dieu, and while aloud I open my heart to the Eternal, Roland in a still crueler manner intensifies, upon the hindquarters I expose to him, his vexations and his torments; with all his strength he flogs those parts with a steel-tipped martinet, each blow draws a gush of blood which springs to the walls.

"Why," he continued with a curse, "he doesn't much aid you, your God, does he? and thus he allows unhappy virtue to suffer, he abandons it to villainy's hands; ah! what a bloody fine God you've got there, Therese, what a superb God he is! Come," he says, "come here, whore, your prayer should be done," and at the same time he places me upon the divan at the back of that cell; "I told you Therese, you have got to die!"

He seizes my arms, binds them to my side, then he slips a black silken noose about my neck; he holds both ends of the cord and, by tightening, he can strangle and dispatch me to the other world ei quickly or slowly, depending upon his pleasure.

"This torture is sweeter than you may imagine, Therese," says Roland; "you will only approach death by way of unspeakably pleasurable sensations; the pressure this noose will bring to bear upon your nervous system will set fire to the organs of voluptuousness; the effect is certain; were all the people who are condemned to this torture to know in what an intoxication of joy it makes one die, less terrified by this retribution for their crimes, they would commit them more often and with much greater self-assurance; this delicious operation, Therese, by causing, as well, the contraction of the locale in which I am going to fit myself," he added as he presented himself to a criminal avenue so worthy of such a villain, "is also going to double my pleasure."

He thrusts, he sweats, 'tis in vain; he prepares the road, 'tis futile; he is too monstrously proportioned, his enterprises are repeatedly frustrated; and then his wrath nails, his hands, his feet fly to revenge him upon the opposition Nature puts up against him; he returns to the assault, the glowing blade slides to the edge of the neighboring canal and smiting vigorously, penetrates to nigh the midway mark; I utter a cry; Roland, enraged by his mistake, withdraws petulantly, and this time hammers at the other gate with such force the moistened dart plunges in, rending me. Roland exploits this first sally's success; his efforts become more violent; he gains ground; as he advances, he gradually tightens the fatal cord he has passed round my neck, hideous screams burst from my lips; amused by them, the ferocious Roland urges me to redouble my howlings, - for he is but too confident of their insufficiency, he is perfectly able to put a stop to them when he wishes; their shrill sharp notes inflame him, the noose's pressure is modulated by his degrees of delight; little by little my voice waxes faint; the tightenings now become so intense that my senses weaken although I do not lose the power to feel; brutally shaken by the enormous instrument with which Roland is rending my entrails, despite my frightful circumstances, I feel myself flooded by his lust's jetted outpourings; I still hear the cries he mouths as he discharges; an instant of stupor followed, I knew not what had happened to me, but soon my eyes open again to the light, I find myself free, untied, and my sensory organs seem to come back to life.

"Well, Therese," says my butcher, "I dare swear that if you'll tell the truth you'll say you felt pleasure only?"

"Only horror, Monsieur, only disgust, only anguish and despair."

"You are Lying, I am fully acquainted with the effects you have just experienced, but what does it matter what they were? I fancy you already know me well enough to be damned certain that when I undertake something with you, the joy you reap from it concerns me infinitely less than my own, and this voluptuousness I seek has been so keen that in an instant I am going to procure some more of it. It is now upon yourself, Therese," declares this signal libertine, "it is upon you alone your life is going to depend."

Whereupon he hitches about my neck the rope that hangs from the ceiling; he has me stand upon a stool, pulls the rope taut, secures it, and to the stool he attaches a string whose end he keeps in his hand as he sits down in an armchair facing me; I am given a sickle which I am to use to sever the rope at the moment when, by means of the string, he jerks the stool from beneath my feet.

"Notice, Therese," he says when all is ready, "that though you may miss your blow, I'll not miss mine; and so I am not mistaken when I say your life depends upon you."

He excites himself; it is at his intoxication's critical moment he is to snatch away the stool which, removed, will leave me dangling from the beam; he does everything possible to pretend the instant has come; he would be beside himself were I to miss my cue; but do what he will, I divine the crisis, the violence of his ecstasy betrays him, I see him make the telltale movement, the stool flies away, I cut the rope and fall to the ground; there I am, completely detached, and although five yards divide us, would you believe it, Madame? I feel my entire body drenched with the evidence of his delirium and his frenzy.

Anyone but I, taking advantage of the weapon she clutched in her hand, would doubtless have leapt upon that monster; but what might I have gained by this brave feat? for I did not have the keys to those subterranean passages, I was ignorant of their scheme, I should have perished before being able to emerge from them; Roland, furthermore, was armed; and so I got up, leaving the sickle on the ground so that he might not conceive the slightest suspicion of my intentions, and indeed he had none, for he had savored the full extent of pleasure and, far more content with my tractability, with my resignation, than with my agility, he signaled to me and we left.

 

34.

 

The next day I cast an appraising eye upon my companions: those four girls ranged from twenty-five to thirty years of age; although bestialized and besotted by misery and warped by excessive drudgery, they still had the remnants of beauty; their figures were handsome, and the youngest, called Suzanne, still had, together with charming eyes, very fine hair; Roland had seized her in Lyon, he had deflowered her, and after having sworn to her family he would marry her, he had brought her to this frightful chateau, where she had been three years his slave, and during that period she had been especially singled out to be the object of the monster's ferocities: by dint of blows from the bull's pizzle, her buttocks had become as calloused and toughened as would be cow's hide dried in the sun; she had a cancer upon her left breast and an abscess in her matrix which caused her unspeakable suffering; all that was the perfidious Roland's achievement; each of those horrors was the fruit of his lecheries.

It was she who informed me Roland was on the eve of departing for Venice if the considerable sums he had very recently shipped to Spain could be converted into letters of credit he needed for Italy, for he did not want to transport his gold east across the Alps; never did he send any in that direction: it was in a different country from the one he had decided to inhabit that he circulated his false coins; by this device, rich to be sure but only in the bank-notes of another kingdom, his rascalities could never be detected in the land where he planned to take up his next abode. But everything could be overthrown within the space of an instant and the retirement he envisioned wholly depended upon this latest transaction in which the bulk of his treasure was compromised. Were Cadiz to accept his false piasters, sequins, and louis, and against them send him letters negotiable in Venice, Roland would be established for the rest of his days; were the fraud to be detected, one single day would suffice to demolish the fragile edifice of his fortune.

"Alas!" I remarked upon learning these details, "Providence will be just for once. It will not countenance the success of such a monster, and all of us will be revenged...."

Great God I in view of the experience I had acquired, how was I able thus to reason!

Toward noon we were given a two-hour respite, which we always used to good advantage to go for a little individual rest and food in our cells; at two o'clock we were reattached to the wheel and were made to work till nightfall; never were we allowed to enter the chateau; if we were naked, 'twas not only because of the heat, but so as better to be able to receive the bull's pizzle beatings our savage master periodically came to inflict upon us; in winter we were given pantaloons and a light sweater which so closely hugged the skin that our bodies were not the less exposed to the blows of a villain whose unique pleasure was to beat us half-senseless.

A week passed during which I saw no sign of Roland; on the ninth day he visited us at work and maintained Suzanne and I were improperly applying ourselves to our task; he distributed thirty cuts with the pizzle upon each of us, slashing us from back to calf.

At midnight on that same day, the evil man came to get me in my kennel and, warmed by the sight of what his cruelties had produced, he once again introduced his terrible bludgeon into the shadowy lair I exposed by the posture he made me assume in order to inspect the vestiges of his rage. When his hungers were appeased I thought to profit from his momentary calm to supplicate him to mitigate my lot. Alas! I was unaware that in such a genius, whereas the delirious interlude stimulates the penchant for cruelty into greater activity, the subsequent reflux does not by any means restore the honest man's pacific virtues to it; 'tis a fire more or less quickened by the fuel wherewith it is fed, but one whose embers, though covered with cinder, burn nonetheless.

"And what right have you," Roland replied to me, "to expect me to sweeten your circumstances? Because of the fantasies I am pleased to put into execution with you? But am I to throw myself at your feet and implore you to accord favors for the granting of which you can implore some recompense? I ask nothing from you, I take, and I simply do not see that, because I exercise one right over you, it must result that I have to abstain from demanding a second; there is no love in what I do: love is a chivalric sentiment I hold in sovereign contempt and to whose assaults my heart is always impervious; I employ a woman out of necessity, as one employs a round and hollow vessel for a different purpose but an analogous need; but never according this individual, which my money and authority make subject to me, either esteem or tenderness, owing to myself what I get from her and never exacting from her anything but submission, I cannot be constrained, in the light of all this, to acknowledge any gratitude toward her. I ask them who would like to compel me to be thankful whether a thief who snatches a man's purse in the woods because he, the thief, is the stronger of the two, owes this man any gratitude for the wrong he has just done him; the same holds true for an outrage committed against a woman: it may justify a repetition of the abuse, but never is it a sufficient reason to grant her compensation."

"Oh, Monsieur," I said to him, "to what limits you do carry your villainy!"

"To the ultimate periods," Roland answered; "there is not a single extravagance in the world in which I have not indulged, not a crime I have not committed, and not one that my doctrines do not excuse or legitimate; unceasingly, I have found in evil a kind of attractiveness which always redounds to my lust's advantage; crime ignites my appetites; the more frightful it is, the more it stimulates; in committing it, I enjoy the same sort of pleasure ordinary folk taste in naught but lubricity, and a hundred times I have discovered myself, while thinking of crime, while surrendering to it, or just after having executed it, in precisely the same state in which one is when confronted by a beautiful naked woman; it irritates my senses in the same way, and I have committed it in order to arouse myself as, when one is filled with impudicious designs, one approaches a beautiful object."

"Oh, Monsieur! 'tis frightful, what you say, but I have beheld examples of it."

"There are a thousand, Therese. It must not be supposed that it is a woman's beauty which best stirs a libertine mind, it is rather the species of crime that the law has associated with possession of her: the proof of which is that the more criminal this possession the more one is inflamed by it; the man who enjoys a woman he steals from her husband, a daughter he snatches from her parents, knows a far greater delectation, no doubt of it, than does the husband who enjoys no one but his wife, and the more the ties one breaks appear to be respected, the more the voluptuousness is compounded. If 'tis one's mother, or one's daughter, so many additional charms to the pleasures experienced; when you've savored all this, then you truly would have interdictions further increase in order to give the violation of them added difficulty and greater charm; now, if pleasure-taking is seasoned by a criminal flavoring, crime, dissociated from this pleasure, may become a joy in itself; there will then be a certain delight in naked crime. Well, it is impossible that what contributes the saline tang not itself be very salty. Thus, let me imagine, the abduction of a girl on one's own account will give a very lively pleasure, but abduction in the interests of someone else will give all that pleasure with which the enjoyment of this girl is improved by rape; the theft of a watch, the rape of a purse will also give the same pleasure, and if I have accustomed my senses to being moved by the rape of some girl qua rape, that same pleasure, that same delight will be found again in the seizing of the watch or of the purse, etc.; and that explains the eccentricity in so many honest folk who steal without needing to steal. Nothing more common; from this moment on, one both tastes the greatest pleasure in everything criminal, and, by every imaginable device, one renders simple enjoyments as criminal as they can possibly be rendered; by conducting oneself in this style, one but adds to enjoyment the dash of salt which was wanting and which became indispensable to happiness' perfection. These doctrines lead far, I know; perhaps, Therese, I shall even show you how far before too long, but what matter? enjoyment's the thing. Was there, for example, dear girl, anything more ordinary or more natural than for me to enjoy you? But you oppose it, you ask that it stop; it would seem that, in the light of my obligations toward you, I ought to grant what you request; however, I surrender to nothing, I listen to nothing, I slash through all the knots that bind fools, I submit you to my desires, and out of the most elementary, the most monotonous enjoyment I evolve one that is really delicious; therefore submit, Therese, submit, and if ever you are reincarnated and return to the world in the guise of the mighty, exploit your privileges in the same way and you will know every one of the most lively and most piquant pleasures."

These words gone out of his mouth, Roland went away and left me to ponder thoughts which, as you may well believe, presented him in no favorable aspect.

I had been six months in this household, from time to time serving the villain's disgraceful debauches, when one night I beheld him enter my prison with Suzanne.

"Come, Therese," said he, " 'tis already a long time, I find, since I took you down to that cavern which impressed you so deeply; both of you are going to accompany me there, but don't expect to climb back together, for I absolutely must leave one of you behind; well, we'll see which one fate designates."

I get to my feet, cast alarmed glances at my companion, I see tears rolling from her eyes... and we set off.

When we were locked into the underground vault, Roland examined each of us with ferocious eyes, he amused himself by reiterating our sentence and persuading us both that one of the two would certainly remain there below.

"Well," said he, seating himself and having us stand directly before him, "each of you take your turn and set to work exorcising this disabled object; there's a devil in it keeps it limp, and woe unto the one of you who restores its energy."

" 'Tis an injustice," quoth Suzanne; "she who arouses you most should be the one to obtain your mercy."

"Not at all," Roland retorted, "once it is manifest which of you arouses me most, it is established which one's death will give me the greater pleasure... and I'm aiming at pleasure, nothing else. Moreover, by sparing her who inflames me the more rapidly, you would both proceed with such industry that you might perhaps plunge my senses into their ecstasy before the sacrifice were consummated, and that must not happen."

" 'Tis to want evil for evil's sake, Monsieur," I said to Roland, "the completion of your ecstasy ought to be the only thing you desire, and if you attain it without crime, why do you want to commit one ?"

"Because I only deliciously reach the critical stage in this way, and because I only came down here in order to commit one. I know perfectly well I might succeed without it, but I want it in order to succeed."

And, during this dialogue, having chosen me to begin, I start exciting his behind with one hand, his front with the other, while he touches at his leisure every part of my body offered him by my nakedness.

"You've still a long way to go, Therese," said he, fingering my buttocks, "before this fine flesh is in the state of petrified callosity and mortification apparent in Suzanne's; one might light a fire under that dear girl's cheeks without her feeling a thing; but you, Therese, you... these are yet roses bound in lilies: we'll get to them in good time, in good time."

You simply have no idea, Madame, how much that threat set me at ease; Roland doubtless did not suspect, as he uttered it, the peace it sent flooding through me, for was it not clear that, since he planned to expose me to further cruelties, he was not yet eager to immolate me? I have told you, Madame, that everything the wretched hear drives home, and thenceforth I was reassured. Another increase of happiness! I was performing in vain, and that enormous mass telescoped into itself resisted all my shakings; Suzanne was in the same posture, she was palpated in the same areas, but as her flesh was toughened in a very different way, Roland treated it with much less consideration; however, Suzanne was younger.

"I am convinced," our persecutor was saying, "that the most awesome whips would now fail to draw a drop of blood from that ass."

He made each of us bend over and, our angle of inclination providing him with the four avenues of pleasure, his tongue danced wriggling into the two narrowest; the villain spat into the others; he turned us about, had us kneel between his thighs in such a manner our breasts found themselves at a level with what of him we were stimulating.

"Oh! as regards breasts," said Roland, "you've got to yield to Suzanne; never had you such fine teats; now then, let's take a look at this noble endowment."

And with those words he pressed the poor girl's breasts till, beneath his fingers, they were covered with bruises. At this point it was no longer I who was exciting him, Suzanne had replaced me; scarcely had she fallen into his clutches when his dart, springing from its quiver, began to menace everything surrounding it.

"Suzanne," said Roland, "behold an appalling triumph.... 'tis your death decreed, Suzanne; I feared as much," added that ferocious man as he nipped and clawed her breasts.

As for mine, he only sucked and chewed them. At length, he placed Suzanne on her knees at the edge of the sofa, he made her bend her head and in this attitude he enjoyed her according to the frightful manner natural to him; awakened by new pains, Suzanne struggles and Roland, who simply wishes to skirmish, is content with a brisk passage of arms, and comes to take refuge in me at the same shrine at which he has sacrificed in my companion whom he does not cease to vex and molest the while.

"There's a whore who excites me cruelly," he says to me, "I don't know what to do with her."

"Oh, Monsieur," say I, "have pity upon her; her sufferings could not be more intense."

"Oh, but you're wrong!" the villain replies, "one might . . . ah I if only I had with me that celebrated Emperor Kie, one of the greatest scoundrels ever to have sat on the Chinese throne,'

 

(Kie, the Emperor of China, had a wife as cruel and debauched as he; bloodshed was as naught to them, and for their exclusive pleasure they spilled rivers of it every day; Within their palace they had a secret chamber where victims were put to death before their eyes and while they enjoyed themselves. Theo, one of this Prince's successors had, like him, a very bloodthirsty wife; they invented a brass column and this great cylinder they would heat red hot; unlucky persons were bound to it while the royal couple looked on: "The Princess," writes the historian from whom we have borrowed these touches, "was infinitely entertained by these melancholy victims' contortions and screams; she was not content unless her husband gave her this spectacle frequently." Hist. des Conj. vol. 7, page 43.)

...with Kie we'd really be able to perform wonders. Both he and his wife, they say, immolated victims daily and would have them live twenty-four hours in death's cruelest agonies, and in such a state of suffering that they were constantly on the verge of expiring but never quite able to die, for those monsters administered that kind of aid which made them flutter between relief and torture and only brought them back to life for one minute in order to kill them the next.... I, Therese, I am too gentle, I know nothing of those arts, I'm a mere apprentice."

Roland retires without completing the sacrifice and hurts me almost as much by this precipitous withdrawal as he had upon inserting himself. He throws himself into Suzanne's arms, and joining sarcasm to outrage:

"Amiable creature," he apostrophizes, "with such delight I remember the first instants of our union; never had woman given me such thrilling pleasures, never had I loved one as I did you... let us embrace, Suzanne, for we're going to part, perhaps the season of our separation will be long."

"Monster!" my companion retorts, thrusting him away with horror, "begone; to the torments you inflict upon me, join not the despair of hearing your terrible remarks; sate your rage, tigerish one, but at least respect my sufferings."

Roland laid hands on her, stretched her upon the couch, her legs widespread, and the workshop of generation ideally within range.

"Temple of my ancient pleasures," the infamous creature intoned, "you who procured me delights so sweet when I plucked your first roses, I must indeed address to you my farewells...."

The villain! he drove his fingernails into it and, rummaging about inside for a few minutes while screams burst from Suzanne's mouth, he did not withdraw them until they were covered with blood. Glutted and wearied by these horrors, and feeling, indeed, he could restrain himself no longer:

"Come, Therese, come," he said, "let's conclude all this with a little scene of funambulism: it'll be cut-the-cord, dear girl."

 

(This game, described above, was in great use amongst the Celts from whom we are descended (see Monsieur Peloutier's ‘Histoire d'u Celts’); virtually all these extravagances of debauchery, these extraordinary libertine passions some part of which are described in this book and which, - how ridiculously! today awaken the law's attention, were, in days bygone, either our ancestors' sports, games far superior to our contemporary amusement, or legalized customs, or again, religious ceremonies; currently, they are transformed into crimes. In how many pious rituals did not the pagans employ flagellation! Several people used these identical tortures, or passions, to initiate their warriors; this was known as huscanaver (viz., the religious ceremonies of every race on earth). These pleasantries, whose maximum inconvenience may be at the very most the death of a slut, are capital crimes at the moment. Three cheers for the progress of civilization! How it conspires to the happiness of man, and how much more fortunate than our forebears we are!)

...that was the name he gave that deadly legerdemain of which I gave you a description when I mentioned Roland's cavern for the first time. I mount the three-legged stool, the evil fellow fits the halter about my neck, he takes his place opposite me; although in a frightful state, Suzanne excites him manually; an instant passes, then he snaps the stool from beneath me, but equipped with the sickle, I sever the cord immediately and fall uninjured to the ground.

"Nicely done, very neat!" says Roland, "your turn, Suzanne, there it is, and I'll spare you, if you manage as cleverly."

Suzanne takes my place. Oh, Madame, allow me to pass over that dreadful scene's details.... The poor thing did not recover from it.

"And now off we go, Therese," says Roland, "you'll not return to this place until your time has come."

"Whenever you like, Monsieur, whenever you like," I reply; "I prefer death to the frightful life you have me lead. Are there wretches such as we for whom life can be valuable?..."

 

35.

 

And Roland locked me into my cell. The next day my companions asked what had become of Suzanne and I told them; they were hardly surprised; all were awaiting the same fate and each, like me, seeing therein a term to their suffering, passionately longed for it.

And thus two years went by, Roland indulging in his customary debauchery, I lingering on with the prospect of a cruel death, when one day the news went about the chateau that not only were our master's expectations satisfied, not only had he received the immense quantity of Venetian funds he had wished, but that he had even obtained a further order for another six millions in counterfeit coin for which he would be reimbursed in Italy when he arrived to claim payment; the scoundrel could not possibly have enjoyed better luck; he was going to leave with an income of two millions, not to mention his hopes of getting more: this was the new piece of evidence Providence had prepared for me. This was the latest manner in which it wished to convince me that prosperity belongs to Crime only and indigence to Virtue.

Matters were at this stage when Roland came to take me to his cavern a third time. I recollect what he threatened me with on my previous visit, I shudder....

"Rest assured," he says, "you've nothing to fear, 'tis a question of something which concerns me alone... an uncommon joy I'd like to taste and from which you will incur no risks."

I follow him. When the doors are shut:

"Therese," says Roland, "there's no one in the house but you to whom I dare confide the problem; I've got to have a woman of impeccable honesty.... I've no one about but you, I confess that I prefer you to my sister....

Taken aback, I entreat him to clarify himself.

"Then listen," says he; "my fortune is made, but whatever be the favors I have received from fate, it can desert me at any instant; I may be trapped, I could be caught while transporting my bullion, and if that misfortune occurs, Therese, it's the rope that's waiting for me: 'tis the same delight I am pleased to have women savor: that's the one will serve as my undoing; I am as firmly persuaded as I can possibly be that this death is infinitely sweeter than cruel; but as the women upon whom I have tested its initial anguishes have never really wished to tell me the truth, it is in person I wish to be made acquainted with the sensation. By way of the experience itself I want to find out whether it is not very certain this asphyxiation impels, in the individual who undergoes it, the erectory nerve to produce an ejaculation; once convinced this death is but a game, I'll brave it with far greater courage, for it is not my existence's cessation terrifies me: my principles are determined upon that head and well persuaded matter can never become anything but matter again, I have no greater dread of Hell than I have expectation of Paradise; but a cruel death's torments make me apprehensive; I don't wish to suffer when I perish; so let's have a try. You will do to me everything I did to you; I'll strip; I'll mount the stool, you'll adjust the rope, I'll excite myself for a moment, then, as soon as you see things assume a certain consistency, you'll jerk the stool free and I'll remain hanging; you'll leave me there until you either discern my semen's emission or symptoms of death's throes; in the latter case, you'll cut me down at once; in the other, you'll allow Nature to take her course and you'll not detach me until afterward. You observe, Therese, I'm putting my life in your hands; your freedom, your fortune will be your good conduct's reward."

"Ah, Monsieur, there's folly in the proposition."

"No, Therese, I insist the thing be done," he answered, undressing himself, "but behave yourself well; behold what proof I give you of my confidence and high regard !"

What possibility of hesitation had I? Was he not my master? Furthermore, it seemed to me the evil I was going to do him would be immediately offset by the extreme care I would take to save his life: I was going to be mistress of that life, but whatever might be his intentions with respect to me, it would certainly only be in order to restore it to him.

We take our stations; Roland is stimulated by a few of his usual caresses; he climbs upon the stool, I put the halter round his neck; he tells me he wants me to curse him during the process, I am to reproach him with all his life's horrors, I do so; his dart soon rises to menace Heaven, he himself gives me the sign to remove the stool, I obey; would you believe it, Madame? nothing more true than what Roland had conjectured: nothing but symptoms of pleasure ornament his countenance and at practically the same instant rapid jets of semen spring nigh to the vault. When 'tis all shot out without any assistance whatsoever from me, I rush to cut him down, he falls, unconscious, but thanks to my ministrations he quickly recovers his senses.

"Oh Therese !" he exclaims upon opening his eyes, "oh, those sensations are not to be described; they transcend all one can possibly say: let them now do what they wish with me, I stand unflinching before Themis' sword! "You're going to find me guilty yet another time, Therese,"quot; Roland went on, tying my hands behind my back, "no thanks for you, but, dear girl, what can one expect? a man doesn't correct himself at my age.... Beloved creature, you have just saved my life and never have I so powerfully conspired against yours; you lamented Suzanne's fate; ah well, I'll arrange for you to meet again; I'm going to plunge you alive into the dungeon where she expired."

I will not describe my state of mind, Madame, you fancy what it was; in vain did I weep, groan, I was not heeded. Roland opened the fatal dungeon, he hangs out a lamp so that I can still better discern the multitude of corpses wherewith it is filled; next, he passes a cord under my arms which, as you know, are bound behind my back, and by means of this cord he lowers me thirty feet: I am twenty more from the bottom of the pit: in this position I suffer hideously, it is as if my arms are being torn from their sockets. With what terror was I not seized I what a prospect confronted my eyes! Heaps of bodies in the midst of which I was going to finish my life and whose stench was already infecting me. Roland cinches the rope about a stick fitted above the hole then, brandishing a knife, I hear him exciting himself.

"Well, Therese," he cries, "recommend your soul to God, the instant my delirium supervenes will be that when I plunge you into the eternal abyss awaiting you; ah... ah... Therese, ah..." and I feel my head covered with proof of his ecstasy; but, happily, he has not parted the rope: he lifts me out.

"Ha," says he, "were you afraid?"

"Oh, Monsieur -"

" 'Tis thus you'll die, be sure of it, Therese, be sure of it, and 'twas pleasant to familiarize you with your egress."

We climb back to the light.... Was I to complain? or be thankful? What a reward for what I had just done for him! But had the monster not been in a position to do more? Could he not have killed me ? Oh, what a man!

Roland prepared his departure; on the eve of setting out he pays me a visit; I fall before his feet, most urgently I beg him to free me and to give me whatever little sum of money he would like, that I might be able to reach Grenoble.

"Grenoble! Certainly not, Therese, you'd denounce us when you got there."

"Very well, Monsieur," I say, sprinkling his knees with my tears, "I swear to you I'll never go there and, to be sure of me, condescend to take me to Venice with you; I will perhaps find gentler hearts there than in my native land, and once you are so kind as to set me free, I swear to you by all that is holy I will never importune you."

"I'll not aid you, not a pennyworth of aid will you get from me," that peerless rogue answered; "everything connected with pity, commiseration, gratitude is so alien to my heart that were I three times as rich as I am, they'd not see me give one crown to the poor; the spectacle of misery irritates me, amuses me, and when I am unable to do evil myself, I have a delicious time enjoying that accomplished by the hand of destiny. Upon all this I have principles to which, Therese, I adhere faithfully; poverty is part of the natural order; by creating men of dissimilar strength, Nature has convinced us of her desire that inequality be preserved even in those modifications our culture might bring to Nature's laws. To relieve indigence is to violate the established order, to imperil it, it is to enter into revolt against that which Nature has decreed, it is to undermine the equilibrium that is fundamental to her sublimest arrangements; it is to strive to erect an equality very perilous to society, it is to encourage indolence and flatter drones, it is to teach the poor to rob the rich man when the latter is pleased to refuse the former alms, for it's a dangerous habit, and gratuities encourage it."

"Oh, Monsieur, how harsh these principles are! Would you speak thus had you not always been wealthy?"

"Who knows, Therese? everyone has a right to his opinion, that's mine, and I'll not change it. They complain about beggars in France: if they wished to be rid of them, the thing could soon be done; hang seven or eight thousand of 'em and the infamous breed will vanish overnight. The Body Politic should be governed by the same rules that apply to the Body Physical. Would a man devoured by vermin allow them to feed upon him out of sympathy? In our gardens do we not uproot the parasitic plant which harms useful vegetation? Why then should one choose to act otherwise in this case?"

"But Religion," I expostulated, "benevolence, Monsieur, humanity..."

"... are the chopping blocks of all who pretend to happiness," said Roland; "if I have consolidated my own, it is only upon the debris of all those infamous prejudices of mankind; 'tis by mocking laws human and divine; 'tis by constantly sacrificing the weak when I find them in my path, 'tis by abusing the public's good faith; 'tis by ruining the poor and stealing from the rich I have arrived at the summit of that precipice whereupon sits the temple sacred to the divinity I adore; why not imitate me? The narrow road leading to that shrine is as plainly offered to your eyes as mine; the hallucinatory virtues you have preferred to it, have they consoled you for your sacrifices? 'Tis too late, luckless one, 'tis too late, weep for your sins, suffer, and strive to find in the depths of the phantoms you worship, if any finding there is to be done, what the reverence you have shown them has caused you to lose."

With these words, the cruel Roland leaps upon me and I am again forced to serve the unworthy pleasures of a monster I had such good reason to abhor; this time I thought he would strangle me; when his passions were satisfied, he caught up the bull's pizzle and with it smote me above a hundred blows all over my body, the while assuring me I was fortunate he lacked the time to do more.

 

36.

 

On the morrow, before setting out, the wretch presented us with a new scene of cruelty and of barbarity whereof no example is furnished by the annals of Andronicus, Nero, Tiberius, or Wenceslaus. Everyone at the chateau supposed Roland's sister would leave with him, and he had indeed told her to dress and ready herself for the journey; at the moment of mounting his horse, he leads her toward us. "There's your post, vile creature," says he, ordering her to take off her clothes, "I want my comrades to remember me by leaving them as a token the woman for whom they thought I had a fancy; but as we need only a certain number and as I am going to follow a dangerous road upon which my weapons will perhaps be useful, I must try my pistols upon one of these rascals." Whereupon he loads one of his guns, aims it at each of our breasts, and comes at last to his sister. "Off you go, whore," says he, blasting out her brains, "go advise the devil that Roland, the richest villain on earth, is he who most insolently taunts the hand of Heaven and challenges Satan's own!" The poor girl did not expire at once: she writhed in her death throes for a considerable period: 'twas a hideous spectacle: that infamous scoundrel calmly considered it and did not tear his eyes away until he had left us forever.

Everything changed the day after Roland went away. His successor, a gentle and very reasonable man, had us released at once .

"That is hardly fit work for a frail and delicate sex," he said to us with kindness; "animals should be employed at this machine; our trade is criminal enough without further offending the Supreme Being with gratuitous atrocities."

He installed us in the chateau and, without requiring me to do so, suggested I assume possession of the duties Roland's sister had performed; the other women were busied cutting out counterfeit coins, a much less fatiguing task, no doubt, and one for which they were rewarded, as was I, with good lodgings and excellent food.

At the end of two months, Dalville, Roland's successor, informed us of his colleague's happy arrival at Venice; there he had established himself and there realized his fortune and there he enjoyed it in peace and quiet, wholly content, full of the felicity he had anticipated. The fate of the man who replaced him was of a distinctly different character. The unfortunate Dalville was honest in his profession, indeed, even more honest than was necessary in order to be destroyed.

One day, while all was calm at the chateau, while, under the direction of that good master, the work, although criminal, was however being carried on with gaiety, one day the gates were stormed, the moats bridged and the house, before our men had a moment's opportunity to look to their defense, found itself invaded by soldiers of the constabulary, sixty strong. Surrender was our sole alternative; we were shackled like beasts; we were attached to the horses and marches down to Grenoble. "O Heaven!" I said to myself as we entered, "'tis then the scaffold destiny holds for me in this city wherein I wildly fancied my happiness was to be born.... Oh! how deceived is man by his intuitions!"

The court was not long tarrying over the counterfeiters' case; they were all sentenced to the gallows; when the mark that branded me was detected, they scarcely gave themselves the trouble of interrogating me and I was about to be hanged along with the others when I made a last effort to obtain some pity from that famous magistrate who proved to be an honor to his tribunal, a judge of integrity, a beloved citizen, an enlightened philosopher whose wisdom and benevolence will grave his name for all time in letters of gold upon Themis' temple. He listened to me; convinced of my good faith and the authenticity of my wretched plight, he deigned to give my case a little more attention than his cohorts saw fit to lavish upon it.... O great man, 'tis to thee I owe an homage: a miserable creature's gratitude would not sit onerously with thee and the tribute she offers thee, by publishing abroad thy goodness of heart, will always be her sweetest joy.

Monsieur S*** himself became my advocate; my testimony was heard, and his male eloquence illumined the mind of the court. The general depositions of the false coiners they were going to execute fortified the zeal of the man who had the kindness to take an interest in me: I was declared an unwilling party to crime, innocent, and fully acquitted of all charges, was set at complete liberty to become what I wished; to those services my protector added a collection he had taken for my relief, and it totaled more than fifty louis; I began to see a dawning of happiness at last; my presentiments seemed finally about to be realized and I thought I had reached an end of my tribulations when it pleased Providence to convince me they were still far from their definitive cessation.

Upon emerging from jail I took up lodgings at an inn facing the Isere bridge on the side of the faubourgs where, I had been assured, I might find proper quarters. My plan, suggested by the advice of Monsieur S***, was to stay there awhile in order to try to find a situation in the town; in the event the letters of recommendation Monsieur S*** had so kindly given me produced no results, I was to return to Lyon. On the second day I was dining at my inn - -'twas what is called table d'hote Ä when I noticed I was being closely scrutinized by a tall, very handsomely attired woman who went under a baroness' title; upon examining her in my turn, I believed I recognized her; we both rose and approached each other, we embraced like two people who once knew each other but cannot remember under what circumstances.

Then the baroness drew me aside.

"Therese," says she, "am I in error? are you not the person I saved from the Conciergerie ten years ago? have you entirely forgotten your Dubois ?"

Little flattered by this discovery, I however replied to it with politeness, but I was dealing with the most subtle, the most adroit woman in contemporary France; there was no way of eluding her. Dubois overwhelmed me with attentions, she said that she, like the entire town, had taken an interest in my fate but that had she known who I really was, she would have resorted to all sorts of measures and made many a representation to the magistrates, amongst whom, she declared, she had several friends. As usual, I was weak, I permitted myself to be led to this woman's room and there I related my sufferings to her.

"My dear friend," said she, renewing her embraces, "if I have desired to see you more intimately, it is to tell you I have made my fortune and that all I possess is at your disposal; look here," she said, opening some caskets brimming with gold and diamonds, "these are the fruits of my industry; had I worshiped Virtue like you, I should be in prison today, or hanged."

"O Madame," I cried, "if you owe all that to naught but crime, Providence, which eventually is always just, will not suffer you to enjoy it for long."

"An error," said Dubois; "do not imagine that Providence invariably favors Virtue; do not let a brief interlude of prosperity blind you to this point. It is as one to the maintenance of Providence's scheme whether 'tis Peter or Paul who follows the evil career while the other surrenders himself to good; Nature must have an equal quantity of each, and the exercise of crime rather than the commission of good is a matter of you've no idea what indifference to her; listen Therese, pay a little attention to me," continued that corruptor, seating herself and bidding me take a nearby chair; "you have some wit, my child, and your intelligence will be speedily convinced.

"'Tis not man's election of Virtue which brings him happiness, dear girl, for Virtue, like vice, is nothing beyond a scheme of getting along in the world; 'tis not, hence, a question of adopting one course rather than another; 'tis merely a matter of following the road generally taken; he who wanders away from it is always wrong; in an entirely virtuous world, I would recommend virtue to you, because worldly rewards being associated therewith, happiness would infallibly be connected with it too; in a totally corrupt world, I would never advise anything but vice. He who does not walk along with others has inevitably to perish; everyone he encounters he collides with, and, as he is weak, he has necessarily to be crushed. It is in vain the law wishes to re-establish order and restore men to righteousness; too unjust to undertake the task, too insufficient to succeed in it, those laws will lure you away from the beaten path, but only temporarily; never will they make man abandon it. While the general interest of mankind drives it to corruption, he who does not wish to be corrupted with the rest will therefore be fighting against the general interest; well, what happiness can he expect who is in perpetual conflict with the interest of everyone else? Are you going to tell me it is vice which is at odds with mankind's welfare? I would grant this true in a world composed of equal proportions of good and bad people, because in this instance, the interest of the one category would be in clear contradiction with that of the other; however, that does not hold true in a completely corrupt society; in it, my vices outrage the vicious only and provoke in them other vices which they use to square matters: and thus all of us are happy: the vibration becomes general: we have a multitude of conflicts and mutual injuries whereby everyone, immediately recovering what he has just lost, incessantly discovers himself in a happy position. Vice is dangerous to naught but Virtue which, frail and timorous, dares undertake nothing; but when it shall no longer exist on earth, when its wearisome reign shall reach its end, vice thereafter outraging no one but the vicious, will cause other vices to burgeon but will cause no further damage to the virtuous. How could you help but have foundered a thousand times over in the course of your life, Therese? for have you not continually driven up the one-way street all the world has crowded down? Had you turned and abandoned yourself to the tide you would have made a safe port as well as I. Will he who wishes to climb upstream cover as much distance in a day as he who moves with the current? You constantly talk about Providence; ha! what proves to you this Providence is a friend of order and consequently enamored of Virtue? Does It not give you uninterrupted examples of Its injustices and Its irregularities? Is it by sending mankind war, plagues, and famine, is it by having formed a universe vicious in every one of its particulars It manifests to your view Its extreme fondness of good? Why would you have it that vicious individuals displease It since Providence Itself acts only through the intermediary of vices? since all is vice and corruption in Its works? since all is crime and disorder in what It wills? Moreover, whence do we derive those impulses which lead us to do evil? is it not Providence's hand which gives them to us? is there a single one of our sensations which does not come from It? one of our desires which is not Its artifact? is it then reasonable to say that It would allow us or give us penchants for something which might be harmful to It or useless? if then vices serve Providence, why should we wish to disown them, disclaim them, resist them? what would justify our labors to destroy them? and whence comes the right to stifle their voice? A little more philosophy in the world would soon restore all to order and would cause magistrates and legislators to see that the crimes they condemn and punish with such rigor sometimes have a far greater degree of utility than those virtues they preach without practicing and without ever rewarding."

"But when I become sufficiently enfeebled, Madame," I replied, "to be able to embrace your appalling doctrines, how will you manage to suppress the feelings of guilt in my heart whose birth they will cause at every instant?"

"Guilt is an illusion," Dubois answered; "my dear Therese, it it naught but the idiotic murmuring of a soul too debilitated to dare annihilate it."

"Annihilate it! May one?"

"Nothing simpler; one repents only of what one is not in the habit of doing; frequently repeat what makes you remorseful and you'll quickly have done with the business; against your qualms oppose the torch of your passions and self-interest's potent laws: they'll be put to rout in a trice. Remorse is no index of criminality; it merely denotes an easily subjugated spirit; let some absurd command be given you, which forbids you to leave this room, and you'll not depart without guilty feelings however certain it is your departure will cause no one any harm. And so it is not true that it is exclusively crime which excites remorse. By convincing yourself of crime's nullity, of its necessity with what regards Nature's universal scheme, it would therefore be as possible to vanquish the guilt one would sense after having committed it as it would be to throttle that which would be born from your leaving this room after having received the illegal order to stay here. One must begin with a precise analysis of everything mankind denominates as criminal; by convincing oneself that it is merely the infraction of its laws and national manners they characterize thus, that what is called crime in France ceases to be crime two hundred leagues away, that there is no act really considered criminal everywhere upon earth, none which, vicious or criminal here, is not praiseworthy and virtuous a few miles hence, that it is all a matter of opinion and of geography and that it is therefore absurd to tie oneself down to practicing virtues which are only vices somewhere else, and to flying from crimes which are excellent deeds in another climate - I ask you now if, after these reflections, I can still retain any feelings of guilt for having committed, either for the sake of pleasure or of self-interest, a crime in France which is nothing but a virtue in China? or if I ought to make myself very miserable or be prodigiously troubled about practicing actions in France which would have me burned in Siam? Now, if remorse exists only in reason of prohibition, if it is never but born of the wreckage of the inhibitory check and in no wise of the committed act, is it so very wise to allow the impulse in itself to subsist? is it not stupid not to extirpate it at once? Let one become accustomed to considering as inconsequential the act which has just excited remorse; let the scrupulously meditated study of the manners and customs of all the world's nations culminate in one's judging the act indifferent; as a result of this research, let one repeat this act, whatever it is, as often as possible; or, better still, let one commit more powerful versions of the act one is concerting so as better to habituate oneself to it, do this, and familiarity together with reason will soon destroy remorse for it; they will rapidly annihilate this shadowy, furtive impulse, issue of naught but ignorance and education. One will straightway feel that there being nothing really criminal in anything whatsoever, there is stupidity in repentance and pusillanimity in not daring to do everything that may be useful or agreeable to us, whatever be the dikes one must breach, the fences one must topple in order to do it. I am forty-five, Therese; I committed my first crime at fourteen. That one emancipated me from all the bonds that hampered me; since then I have not ceased to chase fortune throughout a career sown with crimes, there's not a single one I've not done or had done... and never have I known any remorse. However that may be, I am reaching my term, yet another two or three neat strokes and I pass from the mediocre condition wherein I was to have spent my life, to an income of above fifty thousand a year. I repeat, my dear, never upon this happily traveled road has remorse made me feel its stings; a catastrophic miscarriage might this instant plunge me from the pinnacle into the abyss, I'd not feel remorse, no: I would lament my want of skill or accuse men, but I should always be at peace with my conscience."

 

37.

 

"Very well," I replied, "very well, Madame, but let's spend a moment reasoning in terms of your own principles: what right have you to require that my conscience be as impregnable as yours when since childhood it has not been accustomed to vanquishing the same prejudices? By what title do you require that my mind, which is not constituted like your own, be able to adopt the same systems? You acknowledge sums of good and evil in Nature, you admit that, in consequence, there must be a certain quantity of beings who practice good and another group which devotes itself to evil; the course I elect is hence natural; therefore, how would you be able to demand that I take leave of the rules Nature prescribes to me ? You say you find happiness in the career you pursue; very well, Madame, why should it be that I do not also find it in the career I pursue ? Do not suppose, furthermore, that the law's vigilance long leaves in peace him who violates its codes, you have just had a striking example of the contrary; of the fifteen scoundrels with whom I was living, fourteen perish ignominiously...."

"And is that what you call a misfortune ?" Dubois asked. "But what does this ignominy mean to him who has principles no longer? When one has trespassed every frontier, when in our eyes honor is no more than a hallucination, reputation of perfect indifference, religion an illusion, death a total annihilation; is it then not the same thing, to die on the scaffold or in bed? There are two varieties of rascals in the world, Therese: the one a powerful fortune or prodigious influence shelters from this tragic end; the other one who is unable to avoid it when taken. The latter, born unprovided with possessions, must have but one desire if he has any esprit: to become rich at no matter what price; if he succeeds, he obtains what he wanted and should be content; if he is put on the rack, what's he to regret since he has nothing to lose? Those laws decreed against banditry are null if they are not extended to apply to the powerful bandit; that the law inspire any dread in the miserable is impossible, for the sword is the miserable man's only resource."

"And do you believe," I broke in, "that in another world Celestial Justice does not await him whom crime has not affrighted in this one?"

"I believe," this dangerous woman answered, "that if there were a God there would be less evil on earth; I believe that since evil exists, these disorders are either expressly ordained by this God, and there you have a barbarous fellow, or he is incapable of preventing them and right away you have a feeble God; in either case, an abominable being, a being whose lightning I should defy and whose laws contemn. Ah, Therese I is not atheism preferable to the one and the other of these extremes? that's my doctrine, dear lass, it's been mine since childhood and I'll surely not renounce it while I live."

"You make me shudder, Madame," I said, getting to my feet; "will you pardon me? for I am unable to listen any longer to your sophistries and blasphemies."

"One moment, Therese," said Dubois, holding me back, "if I cannot conquer your reason, I may at least captivate your heart. I have need of you, do not refuse me your aid; here are a thousand louis: they will be yours as soon as the blow is struck."

Heedless of all but my penchant for doing good, I immediately asked Dubois what was involved so as to forestall, if 'twere possible, the crime she was getting ready to commit.

"Here it is," she said: "have you noticed that young tradesman from Lyon who has been taking his meals here for the past four or five days?"

"Who? Dubreuil?"

"Precisely."

"Well?"

"He is in love with you, he told me so in confidence, your modest and gentle air pleases him infinitely, he adores your candor, your virtue enchants him; this romantic fellow has eight hundred thousand francs in gold or paper, it's all in a little coffer he keeps near his bed; let me give the man to understand you consent to hear him, whether that be true or not; for, does it matter? I'll get him to propose you a drive, you'll take a carriage out of the town, I'll persuade him he will advance matters with you during your promenade; you'll amuse him, you'll keep him away as long as possible, meanwhile I'll rob him, but I'll not flee; his belongings will reach Turin before I quit Grenoble, we will employ all imaginable art to dissuade him from settling his eyes upon us, we'll pretend to assist his searches; however, my departure will be announced, he'll not be surprised thereby, you'll follow me, and the thousand louis will be counted out to you immediately we get to the Piedmont."

"Agreed, Madame," I said to Dubois, fully determined to warn Dubreuil of the concerted theft, "but consider," I added in order more thoroughly to deceive this villain, "that if Dubreuil is fond of me, by revealing the business or by giving myself to him, I might get much more from him than you offer me to betray him."

"Bravo," replied Dubois, "that's what I call an adept scholar, I'm beginning to believe Heaven gave you a greater talent for crime than you pretend: ah well," she continued, picking up a quill, "here's my note for twenty thousand crowns, now dare say no to me."

"Not for the world, Madame," quoth I, taking her note, "but, at least, my weakness and my wrong in surrendering to your seductions are to be attributed only to my impecunious circumstances."

"I'd prefer to interpret it as a meritorious act of your intelligence," said Dubois, "but if you prefer me to blame your poverty, why then, as you like; serve me and you will always be content."

Everything was arranged; the same evening I began in earnest to play my game with Dubreuil, and indeed I discovered he had some taste for me.

Nothing could have been more embarrassing than my situation: I was without any doubt far from lending myself to the proposed crime even had it been worth ten thousand times as much gold; but the idea of denouncing this woman was also painful for me; I was exceedingly loath to expose to death a creature to whom I had owed my freedom ten years before. I should have liked to have been able to find a way of preventing the crime without having it punished, and with anyone else but a consummate villain like Dubois I should have succeeded; here then is what I resolved to do, all the while unaware that this horrible woman's base maneuvers would not only topple the entire edifice of my honorable schemes but even punish me for having dreamt of them.

Upon the day fixed for the projected outing, Dubois invites us both to dine in her room, we accept, and the meal over, Dubreuil and I descend to summon the carriage that has been prepared for us; Dubois does not accompany us, I find myself alone with Dubreuil the moment before we set out.

"Monsieur," I say, speaking very rapidly, "listen closely to me, don't be alarmed, no noise, and above all pay strict attention to what I am going to recommend; have you a reliable friend at this hotel ?"

"Yes, I have a young associate upon whom I can count with absolute confidence."

"Then, Monsieur, go promptly and order him not to leave your room for a second while we are on our drive."

"But I have the key to the room; what does this excess of precaution signify7"

"It is more essential than you believe, Monsieur, I beg you to employ it, or else I shall not go out with you; the woman with whom we dined is a bandit, she only arranged our outing in order more easily to rob you while we are gone; make haste, Monsieur, she is watching us, she is dangerous; quickly, turn your key over to your friend, have him go and install himself in your room and let him not budge until we're back. I'll explain the rest as soon as we are in the carriage."

Dubreuil heeds me, presses my hand in token of thanks, flies to give orders relative to the warning he has received, and returns; we leave; when en route, I disclose the entire adventure to him, I recite mine and inform him of the unhappy circumstances in my life which have caused me to make the acquaintance of such a woman. This correct and sensible young man expresses the deepest gratitude for the service I have just so kindly rendered him, he takes an interest in my misfortunes, and proposes to alleviate them with the bestowal of his hand.

"I am only too happy to be able to make you restitution for the wrongs fortune has done you, Mademoiselle," says he; "I am my own master, dependent upon no one, I am going on to Geneva to make a considerable investment with the funds your timely warning has saved me from losing; accompany me to Switzerland; when we arrive there I shall become your husband and you will not appear in Lyon under any other title, or, if you prefer, Mademoiselle, if you have any misgivings, it will only be in my own country I will give you my name."

Such an offer, so very flattering, was one I dared not refuse; but it did not on the other hand become me to accept it without making Dubreuil aware of all that might cause him to repent it; he was grateful for my delicacy and only insisted the more urgently... unhappy creature that I was! 'twas necessary that happiness be offered me only in order that I be more deeply penetrated with grief at never being able to seize it! it was then ordained that no virtue could be born in my heart without preparing torments for me!

Our conversation had already taken us two leagues from the city, and we were about to dismount in order to enjoy the fresh air along the bank of the Isere, when all of a sudden Dubreuil told me he felt very ill.... He got down, he was seized by dreadful vomitings; I had him climb into the carriage at once and we flew back posthaste to Grenoble. Dubreuil is so sick he has to be borne to his room; his condition startles his associate whom we find there and who, in accordance with instructions, has not stirred from the chamber; a doctor comes, Just Heaven! Dubreuil has been poisoned! I no sooner learn the fatal news than I dash to Dubois' apartment; the infamous creature! she's gone; I rush to my room, my armoire has been forced open, the little money and odds and ends I possess have been removed; Dubois, they tell me, left three hours ago in the direction of Turin. There was no doubt she was the author of this multitude of crimes; she had gone to Dubreuil's door; annoyed to find his room occupied, she revenged herself upon me and had envenomed Dubreuil at dinner so that upon our return, if she had succeeded with her theft, that unhappy young man would be more busied with his own failing life than concerned to pursue her who had made off with his fortune and would let her fly in safety; the accident of his death, occurring, so to speak, while he was in my arms, would make me appear more suspect than herself; nothing directly informed us of the scheme she had contrived, but could it have been different?

And then I rush back to Dubreuil's room; I am not allowed to approach his bedside. "But why?" I demand and am given the reason: the poor man is expiring and is no longer occupied with anyone save his God. However, he exonerates me, he gives assurance of my innocence; he expressly forbids that I be pursued; he dies. Hardly has he closed his eyes when his associate hastens to bring me the news and begs me to be easy. Alas I how could I be? how was I not to weep bitterly for the loss of a man who had so generously offered to extricate me from misery! how was I not to deplore a theft which forced me back into the wretchedness whence I had only a moment before emerged! Frightful creature! I cried; if 'tis to this your principles lead you, is it any wonder they are abhorred and that honest folk punish them! But I was arguing from the injured party's viewpoint and Dubois, who had only reaped happiness therefrom and saw nothing but her interest in what she had undertaken, Dubois, I say, had doubtless reached a very different conclusion.

To Dubreuil's associate, whose name was Valbois, I divulged everything, both what had been concerted against the man we had lost and what had happened to me. He sympathized with me, most sincerely regretted Dubreuil and blamed the overly nice scruples which had prevented me from lodging a complaint instantly I had been advised of Dubois' schemes; we agreed that this monster who needed but four hours to get to another country and security would arrive there before we would be able to organize her pursuit, that to follow her would involve considerable expense, that the inn-keeper, heavily compromised by the proceedings we would launch, by defending himself with vehemence might perhaps end by having me crushed, I... who seemed to be living in Grenoble as one who had missed the gallows by a hairsbreadth. These reasons convinced me and even terrified me to the point I resolved to leave the town without even saying farewell to my protector, Monsieur S * * *. Dubreuil's friend approved the idea; he did not conceal from me that if the entire adventure were to be revealed he would be obliged to make depositions which, his precautions notwithstanding, would involve me as much by my intimacy with Dubreuil as in reason of my last outing with his friend; in the light of which he urged me to leave at once without a word to anyone, and I could be perfectly sure that, on his side, he would never take steps against me, whom he believed innocent, and, in all that had just occurred, whom he could only accuse of weakness.

 

38.

 

Upon pondering Valbois' opinions, I recognized they were that much better the more certain it appeared I would be beheld with suspicion; the less my guilt, the wiser his suggestions; the one thing that spoke in my behalf, the recommendation I had made to Dubreuil at the outset of our promenade, which had, so they told me, been unsatisfactorily explained by the article of his death, would not appear so conclusive as I might hope; whereupon I promptly made my decision; I imparted it to Valbois.

"Would," said he, "that my friend had charged me with some dispositions favorable to you, I should carry out such requests with the greatest pleasure; I am sorry indeed he did not tell me 'twas to you he owed the advice to guard his room; but he said nothing of the sort, not a word did I have from him, and consequently I am obliged to limit myself to merely complying with his orders. What you have suffered by his loss would persuade me to do something in my own name were I able to, Mademoiselle, but I am just setting up in business, I am young, my fortune is not boundless, I am compelled to render an account of Dubreuil to his family and without delay; allow me then to confine myself to the one little service I beg you to accept: here are five louis and I have here as well an honest merchant from Chalon-sur-Saone, my native city; she is going to return there after a day and a night's stop at Lyon where she is called by business matters; I put you into her keeping."

"Madame Bertrand," Valbois continued, "here is the young lady I spoke of; I recommend her to you, she wishes to procure herself a situation. With the same earnestness which would apply were she my own sister, I beg you to take all possible steps to find something in our city which will be suitable to her person, her birth, and her upbringing; that until she is properly installed she incur no expense; do see to her requirements and I shall reimburse you immediately I am home."

Valbois besought me leave to embrace me. "Adieu, Mademoiselle," he continued, "Madame Bertrand sets off tomorrow at daybreak; accompany her and may a little more happiness attend you in a city where I shall perhaps soon have the satisfaction of seeing you again."

The courtesy of this young man, who was in no sort indebted to me, brought tears to my eyes. Kind treatment is sweet indeed when for so long one has experienced naught but the most odious. I accepted his gifts, at the same time swearing I was going to work at nothing but to put myself in a way to be able someday to reciprocate. Alas! I thought as I retired, though the exercise of yet another virtue has just flung me into destitution, at least, for the first time in my life, the hope of consolation looms out of this appalling pit of evil into which Virtue has cast me again.

The hour was not advanced; I needed a breath of air and so went down to the Isere embankment, desiring to stroll there for several instants; and, as almost always happens under similar circumstances, my thoughts, absorbing me entirely, led me far. Finding myself, at length, in an isolated place, I sat down, more leisurely to ponder. However, night descended before I thought to return; of a sudden I felt myself seized by three men: one clapped a hand over my mouth, the other two precipitated me into a carriage, climbed in, and for three full hours we sped along, during which time not one of these brigands deigned either to say a word to me or respond to any of my questions. The blinds were drawn down, I saw nothing; the carriage came to a halt before a house, gates swung wide, we entered, the gates clanged to immediately. My abductors pick me up, lead me through several unlit apartments, and finally leave me in one near which is a room wherein I perceive a light.

"Stay here," says one of my ravishers as he withdraws with his companions, "you're soon going to see an old acquaintance."

And they disappear, carefully shutting all the doors. At almost the same time, that leading into the room where I had spied illumination is opened, and carrying a candle in her hand, I see emerge... oh, Madame, fancy who it was... Dubois... Dubois herself, that frightful monster, devoured, no question of it, by the most ardent desire to be revenged.

"Hither, charming girl," said she in an arrogant tone, "come here and receive the reward for the virtues in which you indulged yourself at my expense..." And angrily clutching my hand: "...ah, you wretch I I'll teach you to betray me!"

"No, Madame, no," I say in great haste, " I betrayed you not at all: inform yourself: I uttered not one word which could cause you any inquietude, no, I spoke not the least word which might compromise you."

"But did you not offer resistance to the crime I meditated? have you not thwarted its execution, worthless creature! You've got to be chastened...."

And, as we were entering, she had no time to say more. The apartment into which I was made to pass was lit with equal sumptuousness and magnificence; at the further end, reclining upon an ottoman, was a man of about forty, wearing a billowing taffeta dressing robe.

"Monseigneur," said Dubois, presenting me to him, "here is the young lady you wanted, she in whom all Grenoble has become interested... the celebrated Therese, to be brief, condemned to hang with the counterfeiters, then delivered thanks to her innocence and her virtue. Acknowledge that I serve you with skill, Monseigneur; not four days ago you evinced your extreme desire to immolate her to your passions; and today I put her into your hands; you will perhaps prefer her to that pretty little pensionnaire from the Benedictine convent at Lyon you also desired and who should be arriving any minute: the latter has her physical and moral integrity this one here has nothing but a sentimental chastity; but it is deep-grained in her being and nowhere will you find a creature more heavily ballasted with candor and honesty. They are both at your disposition, Monseigneur: you'll either dispatch each this evening, or one today and the other tomorrow. As for myself, I am leaving you: your kindnesses in my regard engaged me to make you privy to my Grenoble adventure. One man dead, Monseigneur, one dead man; I must fly Ä"

"Ah no, no, charming woman!" cried the master of the place; "no, stay, and fear nothing while you have my protection! You are as a soul unto my pleasures; you alone possess the art of exciting and satisfying them, and the more you multiply your crimes, the more the thought of you inflames my mind.... But this Therese is a pretty thing...." and addressing himself to me: "what is your age, my child?"

"Twenty-six, Monseigneur," I replied, "and much grief."

"Ha, yes, grief indeed, lots of distress, excellent, I'm familiar with all that, hugely amusing, just what I like; we're going to straighten everything out, we'll put a stop to these tumbles; I guarantee you that in twenty-four hours you'll be unhappy no longer, ha!..." and, with that, dreadful flights of laughter... " 'tis true, eh, Dubois? I've a sure method for ending a young girl's misfortunes, haven't I?"

"Indeed you do," the odious creature replied; "and if Therese weren't a friend of mine, I'd never have brought her to you; but it is only fair I reward her for what she did for me. You'd never imagine how useful this dear thing was to me during my latest enterprise at Grenoble; you, Monseigneur, have had the kindness to accept my expression of gratitude, and, I pray you, repay what I owe her with interest."

The opaque ambiguity of these phrases, what Dubois had said to me upon entering, the species of gentleman with whom I had to do, this other girl whose forthcoming appearance had been announced, all this instantly troubled my imagination to a degree it would be difficult to describe. A cold sweat seeped from my pores and I was about to fall in a swoon Ä 'twas at that instant this man's projects finally became clear to me. He calls me to him, begins with two or three kisses whereby our mouths are obliged to unite; he seeks my tongue, finds and sucks it and his, running deep into my throat, seems to be pumping the very breath from my lungs. He has me bend my head upon his chest, he lifts my hair and closely observes the nape of my neck.

"Oh, 'tis delicious!" he cries, squeezing it vigorously; "I've never seen one so nicely attached; 'twill be divine to make it jump free."

This last remark confirmed all my intimations; I saw very clearly I was once again in the clutches of one of those libertines moved by cruel passions, whose most cherished delights consist in enjoying the agonies or the death of the luckless victims procured them by money; I observed I was in danger of losing my life.

And then a knock at the door; Dubois leaves and an instant later ushers in the young Lyonnaise she had mentioned shortly before. I'll now try to sketch the two personages in whose company you are going to see me for a while. The Monseigneur, whose name and estate T never discovered, was, as I told you, a man of forty years, slender, indeed slight of frame, but vigorously constituted, sinewy, with his muscles almost constantly tensed, powerful biceps showing upon arms that were covered with a growth of thick black hair; everything about him proclaimed strength and good health; his face was animated, his gaze ardent, his eyes small, black, and wicked, there were splendid white teeth in his mouth, and liveliness in his every feature; his height was above average, and this man's amatory goad, which I was to have but too frequent occasion to see and feel, was roughly a foot long and above eight inches around. This incisive, nervous, constantly alerted and oozing instrument, ribboned with great purple veins that rendered its aspect still more formidable, was levitated throughout the seance, which lasted five or six hours; never once did it sink or falter. I had never before or since found a more hirsute man: he resembled those fauns described in fables. His powerful hands ended in fingers whose strength was that of a vice; as for his character, it seemed to me harsh, abrupt, cruel, his mind was inclined to that sarcasm and teasing of a sort calculated to redouble the sufferings one was perfectly well able to see one had to expect such a man would strive to inflict.

The little Lyonnaise was called Eulalie. A glimpse of her was enough to convince one of her distinguished birth and virtue: she was the daughter of one of the City's foremost families from whose house Dubois' criminal hirelings had abducted her under the pretext of conveying her to a rendezvous with the lover she idolized; together with an enchanting forthrightness and naivete, she possessed one of the most delightful countenances imaginable. Barely sixteen years old, Eulalie had the face of a genuine Madonna; her features were embellished by an enviable innocence and modesty; she had little color but was only the more fetching for that; and the sparkle in her superb eyes endowed her pretty face with all the fire and warmth whereof, at first glance, this pallor seemed to deprive her; her rather generous mouth was filled with the prettiest teeth, her already fully matured breasts seemed yet whiter than her complexion; but she was no sense lacking in plumpness: her form was round and well furnished, all her flesh was firm, sweet, and succulent. Dubois asserted it were impossible to behold a more beautiful ass: little expert in these matters, you will permit me to abstain from judging here. A fine mossy growth shadowed her fore end; majestic blond hair floated about all those charms, rendering them still more piquant; and to complete the masterpiece, Nature, who seemed to have created it for pleasure, had endowed her with the sweetest and most lovable temperament. Tender and delicate flower, thus were you to grace the world for but an instant in order more swiftly to be withered!

"Oh, Madame!" she said upon recognizing Dubois, "is it in this way you have deceived me !... Just Heaven! where have you brought me ?"

"You shall see, my child," put in the master of the house, abruptly seizing Eulalie, drawing her to him and forthwith beginning his kisses while, upon his orders, I excited him with one hand.

Eulalie sought to protect herself, but, thrusting the girl toward the libertine, Dubois eliminated all possibility of her escape. The sitting was long; for very fresh, new-blown was that flower, and the hornet's desire to drain its pollen was commensurately great. His iterated suckings were succeeded by an inspection of Eulalie's neck; betimes, I palpated his member and felt it throb with growing insistence.

"Well," said Monseigneur, "here are two victims who shall fill my cup of joy to overflowing: Dubois, you shall be well paid, for I am well served. Let's move into my boudoir; follow us, dear woman, come," he continued as he led us away; "you'll leave tonight, but I need you for the party."

Dubois resigns herself, and we pass into the debauchee's pleasure chamber, where we are stripped naked.

Oh, Madame, I shall not attempt to represent the infamies of which I was at once victim and witness. This monster's pleasures were those of the executioner; his unique joy consisted in decapitating. My luckless companion... oh, no! Madame... no! do not require me to finish... I was about to share her fate; spurred on by Dubois, the villain had decided to render my torture yet more horrible when both experienced a need to revive their strength; whereupon they sat down to eat.... What a debauch! But ought I complain? for did it not save my life? Besotted with wine, exhausted by overeating, both fell dead drunk and slumbered amidst the litter that remained from their feast. No sooner do I see them collapse than I leap to the skirt and mantle Dubois had just removed in order to appear more immodest in her patron's view; I snatch up a candle and spring toward the stairway: this house, divested, or nearly so, of servants, contains nothing to frustrate my escape, I do encounter someone, I put on a terrified air and cry to him to make all haste to relieve his master who is dying, and I reach the door without meeting further obstacles. I have no acquaintance with the roads, I'd not been allowed to see the one whereby we had come, I take the first I see... 'tis the one leading to Grenoble; there is nothing denied us when fortune deigns momentarily to smile upon us; at the inn everyone was still abed, I enter secretly and fly to Valbois' room, knock, Valbois wakes and scarcely recognizes me in my disordered state; he demands to know what has befallen me, I relate the horrors whereof I was simultaneously an observer and object.

"You can have Dubois arrested," I tell him, "she's not far from here, I might even be able to point out the way.... Quite apart from all her other crimes, the wretch has taken both my clothing and the five louis you gave me."

"O Therese," says Valbois, "there's no denying it, you are without doubt the unluckiest girl on earth, but, nevertheless, my honest creature, do you not perceive, amidst all these afflictions which beset you, a celestial arm that saves you? may that be unto you as one additional motive for perpetual virtuousness, for never do good deeds go unrewarded. We will not chase after Dubois, my reasons for letting her go in peace are the same you expounded yesterday, let us simply repair the harm she has done you: here, first of all, is the money she stole from you. In an hour's time I'll have a seamstress bring two complete outfits for you, and some linen.

"But you have got to leave, Therese, you must leave this very day, Bertrand expects you, I've persuaded her to delay her departure a few hours more, join her...."

"O virtuous young man," I cried, falling into my benefactor's arms, "may Heaven someday repay you for the kindness you have done me."

"Ah, Therese," said Valbois, embracing me, "the happiness you wish me... I've enjoyed it already, 'tis presently mine, since your own is my doing... fare thee well."

And thus it was I left Grenoble, Madame, and though I had not found in that city all the felicity I had imagined was awaiting me there, at least I had never met in another so many kindly and goodhearted people assembled to sympathize with or assuage my woes.

My conductress and I were in a small covered carriage drawn by one horse we drove from within; we had with us, beside Madame Bertrand's baggage, her baby girl of fifteen months whom she was still suckling and for whom I straightway, to my vast misfortune, formed an attachment quite as deep as was that of the mother who had brought the infant into the world.

She was, this Bertrand, an unattractive person, suspicious, gossipy, noisy, monotonous, and dull-witted. Every night we regularly emptied the carriage and transported everything into our inn and then went to sleep in the same room. Until Lyon, everything went along very smoothly, but during the three days this woman needed for her business dealings, I fell upon someone I was far from expecting to encounter in that city.

Together with girls from the hotel whom I had got to accompany me, I would take walks on the Rhone quay; one day I all of a sudden espied the Reverend Father Antonin formerly of Saint Mary-in-the-Wood, now superior in charge of his order's establishment located in that city. That monk accosted me and after rebuking me in a very low and still sharper tone for my flight, and having given me to understand I would be running great risks of recapture were he to relay information to the Burgundian monastery, he added, softening his manner, that he would not breathe a word if I should be willing that very instant to come to visit him in his new quarters and to bring with me the girl I was with, who struck him as worth having; then repeating his proposal aloud, and to this other creature: "We shall reward you handsomely, both of you," quoth the monster; "there are ten of us in our house, and I promise you a minimum of one louis from each if your complacency is unlimited." I flush crimson upon hearing these words; I spend a moment trying to convince the monk he has made a mistake; failing at that, I attempt to use signs to induce him to be silent, but nothing prevails with this insolent fellow, and his solicitations become only the more heated; at last having received repeated refusals, he demands to know our address; in order to get rid of him, I immediately give a fictitious one, he writes it down, and leaves us with the assurance we will soon meet again.

 

39.

 

Upon returning to our inn I explained as best I could the history of this unfortunate acquaintance; but whether my companion was not at all satisfied by what I told her, or whether she may perhaps have been exceedingly annoyed by my virtuous performance which deprived her of an adventure wherefrom she might have earned much, she waggled her tongue, the effects of which were only too plainly revealed by Bertrand's remarks upon the occasion of the deplorable catastrophe I am going to relate to you in a moment; however, the monk never did reappear, and we left Lyon.

Having quit the city late, we could get no further than Villefranche that day, and there we stopped for the night; 'twas in that town, Madame, there took place the horrible event which today causes me to appear before you in a criminal guise, although I was no more a malefactor in that one of my life's fateful circumstances than in any other of those where you have observed me so unjustly assaulted by the blows of fate; and as in many another instance, so this time I was flung into the abyss by nothing other than the goodness of my heart and the wickedness of men.

Having made Villefranche toward six o'clock in the evening, we supped in haste and retired directly, that we might be able to undertake a longer stage on the morrow; we had not been two hours in bed when a dreadful smell of smoke roused us from sleep; convinced the flames are near at hand, we get instantly from bed. Just Heaven! the havoc wrought by the fire was already but too frightful; half-naked, we open our door and all around us hear nothing but the fracas of collapsing walls, the noise of burning timbers and woodwork and the shrieks of those who had fallen into the blaze; surrounded by devouring flames we have no idea in which direction to run; to escape their violence, we rush past them and soon find ourselves lost in a milling crush of wretches who, like ourselves, are seeking salvation in flight; at this point I remember that my conductress, more concerned for her own than for her child's safety, has not thought of preserving it from death; without a word to the woman, I fly to our chamber, having to pass through the conflagration and to sustain burns in several places: I snatch up the poor little creature, spring forward to restore her to her mother: I advance along a half-consumed beam, miss my footing, instinctively thrust out my hands, this natural reflex forces me to release the precious burden in my arms... it slips from my grasp and the unlucky child falls into the inferno before its own mother's eyes; at this instant I am myself seized... carried away; too upset to be able to distinguish anything, I am unaware whether 'tis aid or peril which surrounds me but, to my grief, I am but too fully enlightened when, flung into a post chaise, I discover myself beside Dubois who, clapping a pistol to my head, threatens to blow out my brains if I utter a syllable...

"Ah, little villain," says she, "I've got you now and this time for good."

"Oh, Madame! you?" I exclaim. "Here?"

"Everything that has just transpired is my doing," the monster replies, " 'twas by arson I saved your life; and by a fire you're going to lose it: in order to catch you I'd have followed you to Hell had it been necessary. Monseigneur was furious, believe me, when he found out you had escaped; I get two hundred louis for every girl I procure him, and not only did he not want to pay me for Eulalie, but he menaced me with all his anger could produce were I to fail to bring you back. I discovered I'd missed you by two hours at Lyon; yesterday I reached Villefranche an hour after your arrival, I had the hotel burned by the henchmen I always have in my employ, I wanted to incinerate you or get you back; I've got you, I m returning you to a house your flight has plunged into trouble and unquiet, and I'm taking you there, Therese, to be treated in a cruel manner. Monseigneur swore he'd not have tortures terrible enough for you, and we'll not step from this carriage until we are at his seat. Well, Therese, what is your present opinion of Virtue ?"

"Oh, Madame! that it is very frequently crime's prey; that it is happy when triumphant; but that it ought to be the unique object of the Heavenly God's rewards even though human atrocities bring about its downfall upon earth."

"You've not long to wait before you know, Therese, whether there is really a God who punishes or recompenses the deeds of mortals.... Ah! if, in the eternal inexistence you are shortly going to enter, if 'twere possible to cogitate in that state of annihilation, how much you would regret the fruitless sacrifices your inflexible stubbornness has forced you to make to phantoms who have never doled out any but the wages of sorrow.... Therese, there is yet time left to you: if you wish to be my accomplice I'll save you, for, I avow, 'tis more than I can bear to see you break down ever and ever again upon Virtue's routes all beset by perils. What? are you not yet sufficiently punished for your good behavior and false principles? What kind of misery do you have to know in order to be persuaded to mend your ways? What then are the examples you require in order to be convinced the attitude you have adopted is the worst of all and that, as I have told you a hundred times over, one must expect nothing but calamity when, breasting the crowd's headlong stampede, one wishes to be virtuous and alone in a completely corrupt society. You count upon an avenging God; cease to be a gull, Therese, disabuse yourself, the God you fabricate for yourself is but a fiction whose stupid existence is never found elsewhere but in the heads of the crazed; 'tis a phantom invented by human wickedness; the solitary purpose of this illusion is to deceive mankind or to create armed divisions among men. The service it were possible to render humankind would have been instantly to cut the throat of the first impostor who took it into his head to speak of God to men. How much blood that one murder would have spared the universe! Get on, get on with you, Therese, perpetually active Nature, Nature acting always, has no need of a master for her government. And if indeed this master did exist, after all the faults and sins with which he has stuffed creation, would he, think you, would he merit anything from us but scorn and outrage? Ah, if he exists, your God, how I do hate him! Therese, how I abhor him! Yes, were this existence authentic, I affirm that the mere pleasure of perpetually irritating whatever I found that bore his impress or bespoke his touch would become for me the most precious compensation for the necessity in which I would find myself to acknowledge some belief in him.... Once again, Therese, do you wish to become my confederate? A superb possibility presents itself, with courage we can execute the thing; I'll save your life if you'll undertake it. This Monseigneur to whose house we are going, and whom you know, lives alone in the country house where he gives his parties; their species, with which you are familiar, requires isolation; a single valet lives with him when he takes up residence there for the sake of his pleasures: the man riding ahead of the coach, you and I, dear girl, that's three of us against two; when that libertine is inflamed by his lecheries, I'll snatch away the saber with which he decapitates his victims, you'll hold him, we'll kill him, and meanwhile my man will have done in the valet. There's money hidden in that house; more than eight hundred thousand francs, Therese, I'm sure of it, the thing's well worth the trouble... Choose, clever creature, decide: death or an alliance; if you betray me, if you expose my plan to him, I'll accuse you of having contrived it alone, and don't doubt for a moment that the confidence he has always had in me will tip the balance my way... think carefully before you give me your answer: this man is a villain; hence, by assassinating him we merely aid the law whose rigorous treatment he deserves. A day does not go by, Therese, without this rascal murdering a girl; is it then to outrage Virtue by punishing Crime? And does the reasonable proposition I make you still alarm your wild principles?"

"Be certain of it, Madame," I answered; "it is not with object of chastening crime you propose this deed, it is rather with the sole intention of committing one yourself; consequently there cannot be but great evil in doing what you suggest, and no semblance of legitimacy can appear thereupon; better still, even were you to intend to avenge humanity for this man's horrors, you would still be committing evil by doing so, for this is not a problem which concerns you: there are laws decreed to punish the guilty; let those laws take their course, it is not unto our feeble hands the Supreme Being has entrusted their sword, never might we wield that blade without affronting justice."

"Well, then you'll have to die, worthless creature," retorted the furious Dubois, "you'll die; don't tease yourself with hopes of escaping your fate."

"What matters it to me?" I calmly answered, "I shall be delivered of all the ills that assail me; death holds no terrors for me, 'tis life's last sleep, 'tis the downtrodden's haven of repose...."

And, upon these words, that savage beast sprang at me, I thought she was going to strangle me; she struck several blows upon my breast, but released me, however, immediately I cried out, for she feared lest the postilion hear me.

We were moving along at a brisk pace; the man who was riding ahead arranged for new horses and we stopped only long enough to change teams. As the new pair was being harnessed, Dubois suddenly raised her weapon and clapped it to my heart... what was she about to do?... Indeed, my exhaustion and my situation had beaten me down to the point of preferring death to the ordeal of keeping it at bay.

We were then preparing to enter Dauphine, of a sudden six horsemen, galloping at top speed behind our coach, overtook it and, with drawn cutlasses, forced our driver to halt. Thirty feet off the highway was a cottage to which these cavaliers, whom we soon identified as constables, ordered the driver to lead the carriage; when we were alongside it, we were told to get out, and all three of us entered the peasant's dwelling. With an effrontery unthinkable in a woman soiled with unnumbered crimes, Dubois who found herself arrested, archly demanded of these officers whether she were known to them, and with what right they comported themselves thus with a woman of her rank.

"We have not the honor of your acquaintance, Madame," replied the officer in charge of the squadron; "but we are certain you have in your carriage the wretch who yesterday set fire to the principal hotel in Villefranche"; then, eyeing me closely: "she answers the description, Madame, we are not in error - ; have the kindness to surrender her to us and to inform us how a person as respectable as you appear to be could have such a woman in your keeping."

"Why, 'tis very readily accounted for," replied Dubois with yet greater insolence, "and, I declare, I'll neither hide her from you nor take her side in the matter if 'tis certain she is guilty of the horrible crime you speak of. I too was staying at that hotel in Villefranche, I left in the midst of all the commotion and as I am getting into my coach, this girl runs up, begs my compassion, says she has just lost everything in the fire, and implores me to take her with me to Lyon where she hopes to be able to find a place. Far less attentive to my reason than to my heart's promptings, I acquiesced, consented to fetch her along; once in the carriage she offered herself as my servant; once again imprudence led me to agree to everything and I have been taking her to Dauphine where I have my properties and family: 'tis a lesson, assuredly, I presently recognize with utmost clarity all of pity's shortcomings; I shall not again be guilty of them. There she is, gentlemen, there she is; God forbid that I should be interested in such a monster, I abandon her to the law's severest penalties, and, I beseech you, take every step to prevent it from being known that I committed the unfortunate mistake of lending an instant's credence to a single word she uttered."

I wished to defend myself, I wanted to denounce the true villain; my speeches were interpreted as calumniatory recriminations to which Dubois opposed nothing but a contemptuous smile. O fatal effects of misery and biased prepossession, of wealth and of insolence! Were it thinkable that a woman who had herself called Madame la Baronne de Fulconis, who proclaimed a high degree and displayed opulence, who asserted she owned extensive holdings and arrogated a family to herself; were it to be conceived that such a personage could be guilty of a crime wherefrom she did not appear to have the slightest thing to gain? And, on the other hand, did not everything condemn me? I was unprotected, I was poor, 'twas a very sure thing I'd done a fell deed.

The squadron officer read me the catalogue of Bertrand's deposed charges. 'Twas she had accused me; I'd set the inn afire to pillage her with greater ease, and she'd been robbed indeed to her last penny; I'd flung her infant into the flames in order that, blinded by the despair with which this event would overwhelm her, she'd forget all else and give not a thought to my maneuvers; and, furthermore, Bertrand had added, I was a girl of suspect virtue and bad habits who had escaped the gallows at Grenoble and whom she had only taken in charge, very foolishly, thanks to the excessive kindness she had shown a young man from her own district, my lover, no doubt. I had publicly and in broad daylight solicited monks in Lyon: in one word, there was nothing the unworthy creature had not exploited in order to seal my doom, nothing that calumny whetted by despair had not invented in order to besmirch me. Upon the woman's insistence, a juridical examination had been conducted on the premises. The fire had begun in a hayloft into which several persons had taken oath I had entered the evening of that fatal day, and that was true. Searching for a water closet to which I had not been very clearly directed by a maid I had consulted, I had entered this loft having failed to locate the sought after place, and there I had remained long enough to make what I was accused of plausible, or at least to furnish probabilities of its truth; and 'tis well known: in this day and age those are proofs. And so, do what I could to defend myself, the officer's single response was to ready his manacles.

"But, Monsieur," I expostulated before allowing him to put me in irons, "if I robbed my traveling companion at Villefranche, the money ought to be found upon my person; search me."

This ingenuous defense merely excited laughter; I was assured I'd not been alone, that they were certain I had accomplices to whom, as I fled, I had transferred the stolen funds. Then the malicious Dubois, who knew of the brand which to my misfortune Rodin had burned upon my flesh long ago, in one instant Dubois put all sympathy to rout.

"Monsieur," said she to the officer, "so many mistakes are committed every day in affairs of this sort that you will forgive me for the idea that occurs to me: if this girl is guilty of the atrocity she is accused of it is surely not her first; the character required to execute crimes of this variety is not attained in a night: and so I beg you to examine this girl, Monsieur... were you to find, by chance, something upon her wretched body... but if nothing denounces her, allow me to defend and protect her."

The officer agreed to the verification... it was about to be carried out...

"One moment, Monsieur," said I, "stay; this search is to no purpose; Madame knows full well I bear the frightful mark; she also knows very well what misfortune caused it to be put on me: this subterfuge of hers is the crowning horror which will, together with all the rest, be revealed at Themis' own temple. Lead me away, Messieurs: here are my hands, load them with chains; only Crime blushes to carry them, stricken Virtue is made to groan thereby, but is not terrified."

"Truth to tell," quoth Dubois, "I'd never have dreamt my idea would have such success; but as this creature repays my kindness by insidious inculpations, I am willing to return with her if you deem it necessary."

"There's no need whatsoever to do so, Madame la Baronne," rejoined the officer, "this girl is our quarry: her avowals, the mark branded on her body, it all condemns her; we need no one else, and we beg your pardon a thousand times over for having caused you this protracted inconvenience."

I was handcuffed immediately, flung upon the crupper of one of the constables' mounts, and Dubois went off, not before she had completed her insults by giving a few crowns to my guards, which generously bestowed silver was to aid me during my melancholy sojourn while awaiting trial.

O Virtue! I cried when I perceived myself brought to this dreadful humiliation; couldst thou suffer a more penetrating outrage? Were it possible that Crime might dare affront thee and vanquish thee with so much insolence and impunity!

We were soon come to Lyon; upon arrival I was cast into the keep reserved for criminals and there I was inscribed as an arsonist, harlot, child-murderer, and thief.

Seven persons had been burned to death in the hotel; I had myself thought I might be; I had been on the verge of perishing; but she who had been the cause of this horror was eluding the law's vigilance and Heaven's justice: she was triumphant, she was flying on to new crimes whereas, innocent and unlucky, I had naught for prospect but dishonor, castigation, and death.

For such a long time habituated to calumny, injustice, and wretchedness; destined, since childhood, to acquit myself of not a single virtuous deed or feel a single righteous sentiment without suffering instant retribution therefor, my anguish was rather mute and blunted than rending, and I shed fewer tears than I might have supposed... however, as 'tis instinctive in the distressed creature to seek after every possible device to extricate himself from the chasm into which his ill-fortune has plunged him, Father Antonin came to my mind; whatever the mediocre relief I could hope from him, I did not deny to myself I was anxious to see him: I asked for him, he appeared. He had not been informed of by whom he was desired; he affected not to recognize me; whereupon I told the turn-key that it was indeed possible he had forgotten me, having been my confessor only when I was very young, but, I continued, it was as my soul's director I solicited a private interview with him. 'Twas agreed by both parties. As soon as I was alone with this holy man I cast myself at his knees, rained tears upon them and besought him to save me from my cruel situation; I proved my innocence to him; I did not conceal that the culpable proposals he had made me some days before had provoked my young companion's enmity, and presently, said I, she accused me out of spite. The monk listened attentively.

"Therese," said he when I was done, "don't lose control of yourself as you customarily do when someone contradicts your damnable prejudices; you notice to what a pass they've brought you, and you can at present readily convince yourself that it's a hundred times better to be a rascal and happy than well-behaved and unprosperous; your case is as bad as it possibly could be, dear girl, there's nothing to be gained by hiding the fact from you: this Dubois you speak of, having the largest benefits to reap from your doom, will unquestionably labor behind the scene to ruin you: Bertrand will accuse you, all appearances stand against you, and, these days, appearances are sufficient grounds for decreeing the death sentence: you are, hence, lost, 'tis plain: one single means might save you: I get on well with the bailiff, he has considerable influence with this city's magistrature; I'm going to tell him you are my niece, and that by this title I am claiming you: he'll dismiss the entire business: I'll ask to send you back to my family; I'll have you taken away, but 'twill be to our monastery and incarceration there, whence you'll never emerge... and there, why conceal it? you, Therese, will be the bounden slave of my caprices, you'll sate them all without a murmur; as well, you will submit yourself to my colleagues: in a word, you will be as utterly mine as the most subordinated of victims... you heed me: the task is hard; you know what are the passions of libertines of our variety; so make up your mind, and make me prompt answer."

"Begone, Father," I replied, horror-struck, "begone, you are a monster to dare so cruelly take advantage of my circumstances in order to force upon me the alternatives of death or infamy; I shall know how to die, if die I must, but 'twill be to die sinless."

"As you like," quoth the cruel man as he prepared to withdraw; "I have never been one to impose happiness upon reluctant people.... Virtue has so handsomely served you until the present, Therese, you are quite right to worship at its altar... good-bye: above all, let it not occur to you to ask for me again."

He was leaving; an unconquerable impulse drew me to his knees yet another time.

"Tiger!" I exclaimed through my tears, "open your granite heart, let my appalling misadventures melt it, and do not, in order to conclude them, do not impose conditions more dreadful to me than death itself...."

The violence of my movements had disturbed what veiled my breast, it was naked, my disheveled hair fell in cascades upon it, it was wetted thoroughly by my tears; I quicken desires in the dishonest man... desires he wants to satisfy on the spot; he dares discover to me to what point my state arouses them; he dares dream of pleasures lying in the middle of the chains binding me and beneath the sword which is poised to smite me... I was upon my knees... he flings me backward, leaps upon me, there we lie upon the wretched straw I use for a bed; I wish to cry out, he stuffs his handkerchief into my mouth; he ties my arms; master of me, the infamous creature examines me everywhere... everything becomes prey to his gaze, his fingerings, his perfidious caresses; at last, he appeases his desires.

"Listen to me," says he, untying me and readjusting his costume, "you do not want me to be helpful, all very well; I am leaving you; I'll neither aid nor harm you, but if it enters your head to breathe a word of what has just happened, I will, by charging you with yet more enormous crimes, instantly deprive you of all means of defending yourself; reflect carefully before jabbering... I am taken for your confessor... now hark: we are permitted to reveal anything and all when 'tis a question of a criminal; fully approve what I am going to say to your warden, or else I'll crush you like a fly."

He knocks, the jailer appears.

"Monsieur," says the traitor, "the nice young lady is in error; she wished to speak to a Father Antonin who is now in Bordeaux; I have no acquaintance of her, never have I even set eyes upon her: she besought me to hear her confession, I did so, I salute you and her and shall always be ready to present myself when my ministry is esteemed important."

Upon uttering these words, Antonin departs and leaves me as much bewildered by his fraudulence as revolted by his libertinage and insolence.

My situation was so dreadful that, whatever it might be, I could ill afford not to employ every means at my disposal; I recollected Monsieur de Saint-Florent: in the light of my behavior toward him, I was incapable of believing this man could underestimate my character; once long ago I had rendered him a most important service, he had dealt most cruelly with me, and therefore I imagined he could not, in my presently critical plight, very well refuse to make reparation for the wrongs he had done me; no, I was sure he would at least have to acknowledge, as best he were able, what I had so generously done in his behalf; passions' heat might have blinded him upon the two occasions I had held commerce with him; there had been some sort of excuse for his former horrors, but in this instance, it seemed to me, no feeling should prevent him from coming to my aid.... Would he renew his last proposals? to the assistance I was going to request from him would he attach the condition I must agree to the frightful employments he had outlined to me before? ah, very well! I'd accept and, once free, I should easily discover the means to extricate myself from the abominable kind of existence into which he might have the baseness to lure me. Full of these ideas, I write a letter to him, I describe my miseries, I beg him to visit me; but I had not devoted adequate thought to analyzing this man's soul when I supposed it susceptible of infiltration by beneficence; I either did not sufficiently remember his appalling theories, or my wretched weakness constantly forcing me to use my own heart as the standard by which to judge others, fancied this man was bound to comport himself toward me as I should certainly have done toward him.

He arrives; and, as I have asked to see him alone, he is freely introduced into my cell. From the marks of respect showered profusely upon him it was easy to determine the eminent position he held in Lyon.

"Why, it's you!" said he, casting scornful eyes upon me, "I was deceived by the letter; I thought it written by a woman more honest than you and whom I would have helped with all my heart; but what would you have me do for an imbecile of your breed? What! you're guilty of a hundred crimes one more shocking than the other, and when someone suggests a way for you to earn your livelihood you stubbornly reject the proposal? Never has stupidity been carried to these lengths."

"Oh, Monsieur I" I cried, "I am not in the least guilty."

"Then what the devil must one do in order to be?" the harsh creature sharply rejoined. "The first time in my life I clapped eyes on you, there you were, in the thick of a pack of bandits who wanted to assassinate me; and now it is in the municipal prison I discover you, accused of three or four new crimes and wearing, so they tell me, a mark on your shoulder which proclaims your former misdeeds. If that is what you designate by the word honest, do inform me of what it would require not to be."

"Just Heaven, Monsieur!" I replied, "can you excoriate that period in my life when I knew you, and should it not rather be for me to make you blush at the memory of what passed then? You know very well, Monsieur, the bandits who captured you, and amongst whom you found me, kept me with them by force; they wanted to kill you, I saved your life by facilitating your escape while making mine; and what, cruel man, did you do to thank me for my aid? is it possible you can recall your actions without horror? You yourself wanted to murder me; you dazed me by terrible blows and, profiting from my half-unconscious state, you snatched from me what I prized most highly; through an unexampled refinement of cruelty, you plundered me of the little money I possessed quite as if you had desired to summon humiliation and misery to complete your victim's obliteration! And great was your success, barbaric one! indeed, it has been entire; 'tis you who precipitated me into desolation; 'tis you who made the abyss to yawn, and 'tis thanks to you I fell into it and have not ceased to fall since that accursed moment. "Nevertheless, Monsieur, I would forget it all, yes, everything is effaced from my memory, I even ask your pardon for daring to upbraid you for what is past, but can you hide from yourself the fact that some recompense, some gratitude is owing to me? Ah, deign not to seal up your heart when the wing of death brushes its shadow over my unhappy days; 'tis not death I fear, but disgrace; save me from the dread horror of a criminal's end: all I demand from you comes to that single mercy, refuse me it not, and both Heaven and my heart will reward you someday."

I was weeping, I was upon my knees before this ferocious man and, far from reading upon his face the effect I thought I should be able to expect from the disturbances I flattered myself I was producing in his soul, I distinguished nothing but a muscular alteration caused by that sort of lust whose germinal origins are in cruelty. Saint-Florent was seated opposite me; his wicked dark eyes considered me in a dreadful manner, and I noticed his hand glide to a certain sector and his fingers begin to perform those certain motions which indicated I was putting him in a state which was by no means that of pity; he concealed himself withal, and, getting to his feet:

"Look here," he said, "your case rests entirely in the hands of Monsieur de Cardoville; I need not tell you what official post he occupies; it suffices that you know your fate depends absolutely upon him; he and I have been intimate friends since childhood; I shall speak to him; if he agrees to a few arrangements, you will be called for at sunset and in order that he may see you, you'll be brought to either his home or mine; such an interrogation, wrapped in secrecy, will make it much simpler to turn matters in your favor, which could not possibly be done here. If he consents to bestow the favor, justify yourself when you have your interview with him, prove your innocence to him in a persuasive manner; that is all I can do for you. Adieu, Therese, keep yourself ready for any eventuality and above all do not have me waste my time taking futile measures." Saint-Florent left.

Nothing could have equaled my perplexity; there had been so little harmony between that man's remarks, the character I knew him to have, and his actual conduct, that I dreaded yet further pitfalls; but, Madame, pause a moment and decide whether I was right or wrong; was I in a position to hesitate? for my position was desperate; and was I not obliged to leap at everything which had the semblance of assistance? Hence I decided to accompany the persons who would come to fetch me; should I be compelled to prostitute myself, I would put up what defense I could; was it to death I was to be led? too bad; it would not, at least, be ignominious, and I would be rid of all my sufferings. Nine o'clock strikes, the jailer appears, I tremble.

"Follow me," that Cerberus says; "you are wanted by Messieurs Saint-Florent and de Cardoville; consider well and take advantage, as it befits you, of the favor Heaven offers you; there are many here who might desire such a blessing and who will never obtain it."

Arrayed as best I am able, I follow the warden who puts me into the keeping of two strange tall fellows whose savage aspect doubles my fright; not a word do they utter; the carriage rolls off and we halt before an immense mansion I soon recognize as Saint-Florent's. Silence enshrouds everything; it augments my dread, however, my guides grasp my arms, hustle me along, and we climb to the fourth floor; there we discover a number of small decorated apartments; they seem to me very mysterious indeed. As we progress through them every door closes shut behind us, and thus we advance till we reach a remote room in which, I notice, there are no windows; Saint-Florent awaits me, and also the man I am told is Monsieur de Cardoville, in whose hands my case rests; this heavy-set, fleshy personage, provided with a somber and feral countenance, could have been about fifty years of age; although he was in lounging costume, 'twas readily to be seen he was a gentleman of the bar. An air of severity seemed to distinguish his entire aspect; it made a deep impression upon me. O cruel injustice of Providence! 'tis then possible Virtue may be overawed by Crime. The two men who had led me hither, and whom I was better able to make out by the gleam of the twenty candles which lit this room, were not above twenty-five and thirty years old. The first, referred to as La Rose, was a dark handsome chap with Hercules' own figure; he seemed to me the elder; the other had more effeminate features, the loveliest chestnut locks and large brown eyes; he was at least five feet ten inches tall, a very Adonis, had the finest skin to be seen, and was called Julien. As for Saint-Florent, you are acquainted with him; as much of coarseness in his traits as in his character, yet, nevertheless, certain splendid features.

"Everything is secured fast?" Saint-Florent asked Julien.

"We're well shut in, yes, Monsieur," the young man replied; "your servants are off for the night in accordance with your orders and the gatekeeper, who alone is on watch, will follow his instructions to admit no one under any circumstances." These few words enlightened me, I shivered, but what could I have done, confronted as I was by four men?

"Sit down over there, my friends," said Cardoville, kissing the two men, "we'll call for your co-operation when the need arises."

Whereupon Saint-Florent spoke up: "Therese," said he, presenting me to Cardoville, "here is your judge, this is the man upon whom your fate depends; we have discussed your problem; but it appears to me that your crimes are of such a nature we will have much to do to come to terms about them."

"She has exactly forty-two witnesses against her," remarks Cardoville, who takes a seat upon Julien's knees, who kisses him upon the lips, and who permits his fingers to stray over the young man's body in the most immodest fashion; "it's a perfect age since we condemned anyone to die for crimes more conclusively established."

"I? Conclusively established crimes?"

"Conclusively established or inconclusively established," quoth Cardoville, getting to his feet and coming up to shout, with much effrontery, at my very nose, "you're going to burn pissing if you do not, with an entire resignation and the blindest obedience, instantly lend yourself to everything we are going to require of you."

"Yet further horrors!" I cried; "ah indeed! 'tis then only by yielding to infamies innocence can escape the snares set for it by the wicked!"

"That's it; 'tis ordained," Saint-Florent broke in; "you know, my dear: the weak yield to the strong's desires, or fall victims to their wickedness: that's all: that's your whole story, Therese, therefore obey."

And while he spoke the libertine nimbly pulled up my skirts. I recoiled, fended him off, horrified, but, having reeled backward into Cardoville's arms, the latter grasped my hands and thereupon exposed me, defenseless, to his colleague's assaults. The ribbons holding up my skirts were cut, my bodice torn away, my kerchief, my blouse, all were removed, and in no time I found myself before those monsters' eyes as naked as the day I came into the world.

"Resistance..." said one. "Resistance," chimed in the other, both proceeding to despoil me, "the whore fancies she can resist us...." and not a garment was ripped from my body without my receiving a few blows.

When I was in the state they wished, they drew up their chairs, which were provided with protruding armrests; thus a narrow space between the chairs was left and into it I was deposited; and thus they were able to study me at their leisure: while one regarded my fore end, the other mused upon my behind; then they turned me round, and turned me again. In this way I was stared at, handled, kissed for thirty minutes and more; during this examination not one lubricious episode was neglected, and I thought it safe to conjecture, upon the basis of those preliminaries, that each had roughly the same Idiosyncrasies.

"Well, now," Saint-Florent said to his friend, "did I not tell you she had a splendid ass!"

"Yes, by God! her behind is sublime," said the jurist who thereupon kissed it; "I've seen damned few buttocks molded like these: why! look ye! solid and fresh at the same time!... how d'ye suppose that fits with such a tempestuous career ?"

"Why, it's simply that she's never given herself of her own accord; I told you there's nothing as whimsical as this girl's exploits! She's never been had but by rape" Ä and then he drives his five fingers simultaneously into the peristyle of Love's temple Ä "but she's been had... unfortunately, for it's much too capacious for me: accustomed to virgins, I could never put up with this."

Then, swinging me around, he repeated the same ceremony with my behind wherein he found the same flaws.

"Ah well, you know our secret," said Cardoville.

"And I'll employ it too," replied Saint-Florent; "and you who have no need of the same resource, you, who are content with a factitious activity which, although painful for the woman, nevertheless brings enjoyment of her to perfection, you, I hope, will not have her till I'm done."

"Fair enough," Cardoville answered, "while watching you, I'll busy myself with those preludes so cherished by my lechery; I'll play the girl with Julien and La Rose while you masculinize Therese, and, so I think, the one's as good as the other."

"Doubtless a thousand times better; for you've no idea how fed up I am with women !... do you suppose I would be capable of enjoying those whores without the help of the auxiliary episodes we both use to add a tart flavor to the business?"

 

40.

 

With these words, having afforded me clear evidence their state called for more substantial pleasures, the impudicious creatures rose and made me mount upon a large chair, my forearms leaning upon its back, my knees propped upon its arms, and my behind arched so that it was prominently thrust toward them. I was no sooner placed in this attitude than they stepped out of their breeches, tucked up their shirts, and save for their shoes, they thus discovered themselves completely naked from the waist down; they exhibited themselves to me, passed several times to and fro before my eyes, making boastful display of their behinds of which they were overweeningly proud, for, they declared, they had parts far superior to anything I could offer; indeed, each was womanishly made in this region: 'twas especially Cardoville who was possessed of elegant lines and majestic form, snowy white color and enviable plumpness; they whiled away a minute or two polluting themselves in full view of me, but did not ejaculate: about Cardoville, nothing that was not of the most ordinary; as for Saint-Florent, 'twas monstrous: I shuddered to think that such was the dart which had immolated me. Oh Just Heaven! what need of maidenheads had a man of those dimensions? Could it be anything other than ferocity which governed such caprices? But what, alas I were the other weapons I was going to be confronted by! Julien and La Rose, plainly aroused by these exhibitions, also ridded themselves of their clothes and advanced pike in hand.... Oh, Madame! never had anything similar soiled my gaze, and whatever may have been my previous representations, what now I beheld surpassed everything I have been able to describe until the present: 'tis like unto the ascendancy the imperious eagle enjoys over the dove. Our two debauchees soon laid hands upon those menacing spears: they caressed them, polluted them, drew them to their mouths, and the combat straightway became more in earnest. Saint-Florent crouches upon the armchair supporting me; he is so adjusted my widespread buttocks are on an exact level with his mouth; he kisses them, his tongue penetrates into first one then the other temple. Saint-Florent provided Cardoville with amusement, the latter offers himself to the pleasures of La Rose whose terrific member instantly vanishes into the redoubt dressed before him, and Julien, situated beneath Saint-Florent, excites him with his mouth the while grasping his haunches and modulating them before the resolute blows of Cardoville who, treating his friend with intransigent rudeness, does not quit him before having wetted the sanctuary with his incense. Nothing could equal Cardoville's transports when the crisis deprives him of his senses; softly abandoning himself to the man who is serving as husband to him, but pressing hard after him of whom he is making a wife, this dastardly libertine, with hoarse gasps like unto those of a dying man, thereupon pronounces indescribable blasphemies; as for Saint-Florent, measure governs his evolutions, he restrains himself, and the tableau is dissolved without his having performed his beau geste.

"Truly," Cardoville says to his comrade, "you still give me as much pleasure as you did when you were fifteen.... Indeed," he continues, turning and kissing La Rose, " 'tis true this fine lad knows how to arouse me too.... Have you not found me rather gulfy this evening, angelic boy?... would you believe it, Saint-Florent? 'tis the thirty-sixth time I've had it today... only natural that the thing be somewhat dilated; I'm all yours, dear friend," the abominable man pursues, fitting himself into Julien's mouth, his nose glued to my behind, and his own offered to Saint-Florent, "I'm yours for the thirty-seventh." Saint-Florent takes his pleasure with Cardoville, La Rose his with Saint-Florent, and after a quick skirmish the latter burns in his friend the same offering his friend had burned in him. If Saint-Florent's ecstasy was of briefer duration, it was no less intense, less noisy, less criminal than Cardoville's; the one shouted, roared out everything that came to his mouth, the other restricted his transports' scope without their being the less energetic for that; Saint-Florent chose his words with care, but they were simply yet filthier and more impure: distraction and rage, to select precise terms, seemed to characterize the delirium of the one, wickedness and ferocity were the eminent qualities announced in the other's.

"To work, Therese, revive us," says Cardoville; "you see the lamps are extinguished, they've got to be lit again."

While Julien enjoyed Cardoville and La Rose Saint-Florent, the two libertines inclined over me and one after the other inserted their languishing instruments into my mouth; while I pumped one, I was obliged to go to the rescue of the other and pollute it with my hands, then I had to anoint the member itself and the adjacent parts with an alcoholic liquid I had been given; but I was not to limit myself to sucking, I had to revolve my tongue about the heads and I was required to nibble them with my teeth while my lips squeezed tightly about them. However, our two patients were being vigorously thumped and jolted; Julien and La Rose shifted in order to increase the sensations produced by entrances and exits. When at length two or three homages had flowed into those impure temples I began to perceive a degree of firmness; although the elder of the two, Cardoville's was the first to manifest solidity; he swung his hand and with all the strength at his command slapped one of my titties: that was my reward. Saint-Florent was not far behind him; he repaid my efforts by nearly tearing one of my ears from my head. They backed away, reviewed the situation, and then warned me to prepare to receive the treatment I richly deserved. An analysis of these libertines' appalling language allowed to me to conclude that vexations were about to descend like a hailstorm upon me. To have besought mercy in the state to which they had just reduced me would have been to have further aroused them: and so they placed me, completely naked as I was, in the center of the circle they formed by all four drawing up chairs. I was obliged to parade from one to the next and to receive the penance each in his turn chose to order me to do; I had no more compassion from the youths than from the older men, but 'twas above all Cardoville who distinguished himself by refined teasings which Saint-Florent, cruel as he was, was unable to duplicate without an effort.

A brief respite succeeded these vicious orgies, I was given a few instants to catch my breath; I had been beaten black and blue, but what surprised me was that they doctored and healed the damage done me in less time than it had taken to inflict it, whereof not the slightest trace remained. The lubricities were resumed.

There were moments when all those bodies seemed to form but one and when Saint-Florent, lover and mistress, received copious quantities of what the impotent Cardoville doled out with sparing economy: the next instant, no longer active but lending himself in every manner, both his mouth and hindquarters served as altars to frightful homages. Cardoville cannot resist such a profusion of libertine scenes. Seeing his friend brilliantly elevated, he comes up to offer himself to Saint-Florent's lust, and the tradesman enjoys him; I sharpen the spears, I steer them in the direction they are to thrust, and my exposed buttocks provide a perspective to the lubricity of some, a target for the bestiality of others. As all this wears on our two libertines become more circumspect, for considerable efforts are the price of reanimation; they emerge unscathed from their joustings and their new state is such to terrify me even more.

"Very well, La Rose," says Saint-Florent, "take the bitch; we'll tighten her up: it's time for the stricturing."

I am not familiar with the expression: a cruel experiment soon reveals its meaning. La Rose seizes me, he places my flanks upon a small circular repentance stool not a foot in diameter: once there, lacking any other support, my legs fall on one side, my head and arms on the other; my four limbs, stretched as far apart as possible, are tied to the floor; the executioner who is going to perform the stricturing catches up a long needle through whose eye he passes a stout waxed thread, and with complete unconcern for either the blood he is to shed or the sufferings he is going to cause me, the monster, directly before the two colleagues whom the spectacle amuses, sews shut the entrance to the temple of Love; when finished, he turns me over, now my belly rests upon the repentance stool; my limbs hang free, they are attached as before, and the indecent shrine of Sodom is barricaded in the same manner: I do not speak of my agonies, Madame, you must yourself fancy what they were, I was on the verge of losing consciousness.

"Splendid, that's how I must have them," quoth Saint-Florent when I had been turned over again and was lying on my buttocks, and when, in this posture, he spied well within striking range the fortress he wanted to invade. "Accustomed to reaping nothing but the first fruits, how, without this ceremony, should I be able to harvest any pleasures from this creature ?"

Saint-Florent had the most violent erection, they were currying and drubbing his device to keep it rampant; grasping that pike, he advances: in order to excite him further, Julien enjoys Cardoville before his eyes; Saint-Florent opens the attack, maddened by the resistance he encounters, he presses ahead with incredible vigor, the threads are strained, some snap. Hell's tortures are as naught to mine; the keener my agonies, the more piquant seem to be my tormenter's delights. At length, everything capitulates before his efforts, I am ripped asunder, the glittering dart sinks to the ultimate depths, but Saint-Florent, anxious to husband his strength, merely touches bottom and withdraws; I am turned over; the same obstacles: the savage one scouts them as he stands heating his engine and with his ferocious hands he molests the environs in order to put the place in fit condition for assault. He presents himself, the natural smallness of the locale renders his campaign more arduous to wage, my redoubtable vanquisher soon storms the gates, clears the entry; I am bleeding; but what does it matter to the conquering hero? Two vigorous heaves carry him into the sanctuary and there the villain consummates a dreadful sacrifice whose racking pains I should not have been able to endure another second.

"My turn," cries up Cardoville, causing me to be untied, "I'll have no tailoring done, but I'm going to place the dear girl upon a camping bed which should restore her circulation, and bring out all the warmth and mobility her temperament or her virtue refuse us."

Upon the spot La Rose opens a closet and draws out a cross made of gnarled, thorny, spiny wood. 'Tis thereon the infamous debauchee wishes to place me, but by means of what episode will he improve his cruel enjoyment? Before attaching me, Cardoville inserts into my behind a silver-colored ball the size of an egg; he lubricates it and drives it home: it disappears. Immediately it is in my body I feel it enlarge and begin to burn; without heeding my complaints, I am lashed securely to this thorn-studded frame; Cardoville penetrates as he fastens himself to me: he presses my back, my flanks, my buttocks on the protuberances upon which they are suspended. Julien fits himself into Cardoville; obliged to bear the weight of these two bodies, and having nothing to support myself upon but these accursed knots and knurs which gouge into my flesh, you may easily conceive what I suffered; the more I thrust up against those who press down upon me, the more I am driven upon the irregularities which stab and lacerate me. Meanwhile the terrible globe has worked its way deep into my bowels and is cramping them, burning them, tearing them; I scream again and again: no words exist which can describe what I am undergoing; all the same and all the while, my murderer frolics joyfully, his mouth glued to mine, he seems to inhale my pain in order that it may magnify his pleasures: his intoxication is not to be rendered; but, as in his friend's instance, he feels his forces about to desert him, and like Saint-Florent wants to taste everything before they are gone entirely. I am turned over again, am made to eject the ardent sphere, and it is set to producing in the vagina itself, the same conflagration it ignited in the place whence it has just been flushed; the ball enters, sears, scorches the matrix to its depths; I am not spared, they fasten me belly-down upon the perfidious cross, and far more delicate parts of me are exposed to molestation by the thorny excrescences awaiting them. Cardoville penetrates into the forbidden passage; he perforates it while another enjoys him in similar wise: and at last delirium holds my persecutor in its grasp, his appalling shrieks announce the crime's completion; I am inundated, then untied.

"Off you go, dear friends," Cardoville says to the pair of young men, "get your hands on this whore and amuse yourselves in whatever way your whims advise: she's yours, we're done with her." The two youthful libertines seize me. While one entertains himself with the front, the other buries himself in the rear; they change places and change again; I am more gravely torn by their prodigious thickness than I have been by Saint-Florent's artificial barricadings; both he and Cardoville toy with the young men while they occupy themselves with me. Saint-Florent sodomizes La Rose who deals in like manner with me, and Cardoville does as much to Julien who employs a more decent place to excite himself in me. I am the focal point of these execrable orgies, their absolute center and mainspring; La Rose and Julien have each four times done reverence at my altars, whilst Cardoville and Saint-Florent, less vigorous or more enervated, are content with one sacrifice offered to each of my lovers. And then the last measure of seed is sown by La Rose Ä 'twas high time, for I was ready to swoon.

"My comrade has certainly hurt you, Therese," says Julien, "and I am going to repair all the damage." He picks up a flask of spirits and several times rubs all my wounds. The traces of my executioners' atrocities vanish, but nothing assuages my pain, and never had I experienced any as sharp.

"What with our skill at making the evidence of our cruelties disappear, the ladies who would like to lodge complaints against us must have the devil's own time getting themselves believed, eh, Therese?" says Cardoville. "What proofs do you fancy could be presented to support an accusation ?"

"Oh," Saint-Florent interrupts, "the charming Therese is in no condition to level charges; on the eve of being immolated herself, we ought to expect nothing but prayers from her."

"Well, she'd be ill-advised to undertake the one or the other," Cardoville replies; "she might inculpate us; but would she be heard? I doubt it; our consequence and eminent stations in this city would scarcely allow anyone to notice suits which, anyhow, always come before us and whereof we are at all times the masters. Her final torture would simply be made crueler and more prolonged. Therese must surely sense we have amused ourselves with her person for the natural, common, and uncomplex reason which engages might to abuse feebleness; she must surely sense she can-not escape her sentence, that it must be undergone, that she will undergo it, that it would be in vain she might divulge this evening's absence from jail; she'd not be believed; the jailer Ä for he's ours Ä would deny it at once. And so may this lovely and gentle girl, so penetrated with the grandeur of Providence, peacefully offer up to Heaven all she has just suffered and all that yet awaits her; these will be as so many expiations for the frightful crimes which deliver her into the hands of the law; put on your clothes, Therese, day is not yet come, the two men who brought you hither are going to conduct you back to your prison."

I wanted to say a word, I wanted to cast myself a suppliant at these ogres' feet, either to unbend their hearts, or ask that their hands smite away my life. But I am dragged off, pitched into a cab, and my two guides climb in after me; we had hardly started off when infamous desires inflamed them again.

"Hold her for me," quoth Julien to La Rose, "I simply must sodomize her; I have never laid eyes on a behind which could squeeze me so voluptuously; I'll render you the same service."

There is nothing I can do to defend myself, the project is executed, Julien triumphs, and it is not without atrocious agonies I sustain this newest attack: the assailant's exorbitant bulk, the lacerated condition of those parts, the fire with which that accursed ball had devoured my intestines, everything combined to make me suffer tortures which La Rose renewed immediately his companion was finished. Before arriving I was thus yet another time victim of those wretched valets' criminal libertinage; we reached our destination at last. The jailer greeted us, he was alone, it was still night, no one saw me enter.

"Go to sleep, Therese," said he, restoring me to my cell, "and if ever you wish to tell, it makes no difference whom, that on this night you left prison, remember that I will contradict you, and that this useless accusation will get you nowhere...."

And, said I to myself when I was left alone, I should regret departing this world! I should dread to leave a universe freighted with such monsters! Ah! were the hand of God to snatch me from their clutches at whatever instant and in whatever manner He sees fit! why! I'd complain no more; the unique consolation which may remain to the luckless one bred up in this den of savage beasts, his one comfort is the hope of leaving it soon.

The next day I heard nothing and resolved to abandon myself to Providence, I languished and would touch no food. The day after that, Cardoville came to question me; I could not repress a shudder upon beholding the nonchalance wherewith that scoundrel walked in to execute his judiciary duties Ä he, Cardoville, the most villainous of mortals, he who, contrary to every article of the justice in which he was cloaked, had just so cruelly abused my innocence and exploited my misery; it was in vain I pled my cause, the dishonest man's artfulness devised more crimes than I could invent defenses; when all the charges had been well established in the view of this iniquitous judge, and when the case was made, he had the impudence to ask me whether I knew in Lyon one Monsieur de Saint-Florent, a wealthy and estimable citizen; I answered that I knew him, yes.

"Excellent," said Cardoville, "no more is needed. This Monsieur de Saint-Florent, whom you declare you know, also has a perfect knowledge of you; he has deposed that he saw you in a band of thieves, that you were the first to steal his money and his pocket- book. He further deposes that your comrades wished to spare his life, that you recommended they take it from him; nevertheless, he managed to escape. Saint-Florent adds that, several years later, having recognized you in Lyon, he yielded to your importunings and permitted you to come to pay him a call at his home upon condition you would give him your word to behave well in future and that, while he was delivering a lecture on manners to you, while he was seeking to persuade you to persist along the paths of righteousness, you carried insolence and crime to the point of choosing these moments of kindness to steal a watch and one hundred louis he had left lying upon the mantel...."

And, profiting from the resentment and anger such atrocious calumnies provoked in me, Cardoville ordered the court clerk to write that my silence and my facial expressions were ample acknowledgment of my guilt and were tantamount to a confession.

I threw myself upon the ground, I made the walls resound with my cries, I struck my head against the stone floor, hoping to obtain a speedier death, unable to find vehicles to give expression to my rage: "Villain!" I screamed, "I put my faith in the God of Justice who will revenge me for your crimes; He shall cry out innocence, He shall make you repent your disgraceful abuse of the authority vested in you!" Cardoville rings and tells the jailer to take me away, I appear, says he, to be unsettled by despair and remorse and, at any rate, in no state to follow the interrogation; "But, on the other hand, what remains to be asked or said? The dossier is complete; she has confessed to all her crimes." And the villain leaves peacefully I And divine lightning strikes him not!

The case was tried in short order; motivated and directed by hatred, vengeance, and lust, the court promptly condemned me and I was dispatched to Paris for the confirmation of my sentence. While on this fatal journey, which, though guiltless, I made in the character of the last of criminals, the most bitter and the most dolorous thoughts gathered in my head and completed the desolation of my heart. Under what doom-spelling star must I have been born, I wondered, in order that I be utterly incapable of conceiving a single generous sentiment without immediately being drowned in a sea of misfortunes! And why is it that this enlightened Providence whose justice I am pleased to worship, the while punishing me for my virtues, simultaneously shows me those who crush me with their crimes carried to the pinnacle of happiness!

During my childhood I meet a usurer; he seeks to induce me to commit a theft, I refuse, he becomes rich. I fall amongst a band of thieves, I escape from them with a man whose life I save; by way of thanks, he rapes me. I reach the property of an aristocratic debauchee who has me set upon and devoured by his dogs for not having wanted to poison his aunt. From there I go to the home of a murderous and incestuous surgeon whom I strive to spare from doing a horrible deed: the butcher brands me for a criminal; he doubtless consummates his atrocities, makes his fortune, whilst I am obliged to beg for my bread. I wish to have the sacraments made available to me, I wish fervently to implore the Supreme Being whence howbeit I receive so many ills, and the august tribunal, at which I hope to find purification in our most holy mysteries, becomes the bloody theater of my ignominy: the monster who abuses and plunders me is elevated to his order's highest honors and I fall back into the appalling abyss of misery. I attempt to preserve a woman from her husband's fury, the cruel one wishes to put me to death by draining away my blood drop by drop. I wish to relieve a poor woman, she robs me. I give aid to a man whom adversaries have struck down and left unconscious, the thankless creature makes me turn a wheel like an animal; he hangs me for his pleasure's sake; all fortune's blessings accrue to him, and I come within an ace of dying on the gallows for having been compelled to work for him. An unworthy woman seeks to seduce me for a new crime, a second time I lose the little I own in order to rescue her victim's treasure. A gentleman, a kind spirit wishes to compensate me for all my sufferings by the offer of his hand, he dies in my arms before being able to do anything for me. I risk my life in a fire in order to snatch a child, who does not belong to me, from the flames; the infant's mother accuses and launches legal proceedings against me. I fall into my most mortal enemy's hands; she wishes to carry me off by force and take me to a man whose passion is to cut off heads: if I avoid that villain's sword it is so that I can trip and fall under Themis'. I implore the protection of a man whose life and fortune I once saved; I dare expect gratitude from him, he lures me to his house, he submits me to horrors, and there I find the iniquitous judge upon whom my case depends; both abuse me, both outrage me, both accelerate my doom; fortune overwhelms them with favors, I hasten on to death.

That is what I have received from mankind, that is what I have learned of the danger of trafficking with men; is it any wonder that my soul, stung, whipsawed by unhappiness, revolted by outrage and injustice, aspires to nothing more than bursting from its mortal confines ?

A thousand pardons, Madame, said this unlucky girl, terminating her adventures at this point; a thousand times over I ask to be forgiven for having sullied your spirit with such a host of obscenities, for having, in a word, so long abused your patience. I have, perhaps, offended Heaven with impure recitals, I have laid open my old wounds, I have disturbed your ease and rest; farewell, Madame, Godspeed; the Star rises above the horizon, I hear my guards summon me to come, let me run on to meet my destiny, I fear it no more, 'twill abridge my torment: this last mortal instant is dreaded only by the favored being whose days have passed un-clouded; but the wretched creature who has breathed naught but the venomous effluvia of reptiles, whose tottering feet have trod only upon nettles, who has never beheld the torch of dawn save with feelings like unto those of the lost traveler who, trembling, perceives the thunderbolt's forked track; she from whom cruel accident has snatched away parents, all kin, friends, fortune, protection, aid; she who in all this world has nothing more than tears to quench her thirst and for sustenance her tribulations; she, I say, undismayed sees death advance, she even yearns for it as for a safe haven, a port wherein tranquillity will be born again unto her when she is clasped to the breast of a God too just to permit that innocence, defiled and ground under the heel on earth, may not find recompense for so many evils in another world.

The honest Monsieur de Corville had not heard this tale without profound emotion; as for Madame de Lorsange in whom, as we have said, the monstrous errors of her youth had not by any means extinguished sensibility, as for Madame de Lorsange, she was ready to swoon.

"Mademoiselle," said she to Justine, "it is difficult to listen to you without taking the keenest interest in you; but, and I must avow it! an inexplicable sentiment, one far more tender than this I describe, draws me invincibly toward you and does make of your ills my very own. You have disguised your name, you have concealed your birth, I beg you to disclose your secret to me; think not that it is a vain curiosity which bids me speak thus to you... Great God! may what I suspect be true?... O Therese! were you Justine?... were it that you would be my sister !"

"Justine ! Madame ! 'tis a strange name."

"She would have been your age -"

"Juliette! is it you I hear?" cried the unhappy prisoner, casting herself into Madame de Lorsange's arms; "... you... my sister!... ah, I shall die far less miserable, for I have been able to embrace you again!..."

And the two sisters, clasped in each other's arms, were prevented by their sobs from hearing one another, and found expression in naught but tears.

Monsieur de Corville was unable to hold back his own; aware of the overpowering significance of this affair and sensing his involvement in it, he moves into an adjoining room, sits down and writes a letter to the Lord Chancellor, with fiery strokes, in ardent ciphers he paints in all its horror the fate of poor Justine, whom we shall continue to call Therese; he takes upon himself responsibility for her innocence, he will guarantee it under oath; he asks that, until the time her case has been finally clarified, the allegedly guilty party be confined to no other prison but his chateau, and Corville gives his word he will produce her in court the instant the Chief Justice signals his desire to have her appear there; he makes himself known unto Therese's two guards, entrusts his correspondence to them, makes himself answerable for their prisoner; he is obeyed, Therese is confided to him; a carriage is called for.

"Come, my too unfortunate creature," Monsieur de Corville says to Madame de Lorsange's interesting sister, "come hither; all is going to be changed; it shall not be said your virtues ever remained unrewarded and that the beautiful soul you had from Nature ever encountered but steel; follow us, 'tis upon me you depend henceforth...."

And Monsieur de Corville gave a brief account of what he had just done.

"Dearly beloved and respectable man," said Madame de Lorsange, casting herself down before her lover, "this is the most splendid gesture you have performed in your life, it is such as comes from one who has true acquaintance with the human heart and the spirit of the law which is the avenger of oppressed innocence. There she stands, Monsieur, behold, there is your captive; go, Therese, go, run, fly at once and kneel down before this equitable protector who will not, as have all others, abandon you. O, Monsieur, if those attachments of love which have bound me to you have been cherished, how much more so are they to become now that they are strengthened by the most tender esteem...."

And one after the other the two women embraced the knees of a so generous friend, and upon him they did shed their tears.

A few hours later they arrived at the chateau; once there, Monsieur de Corville and Madame de Lorsange both strove with might and main to raise Therese from the ultimate deeps of unhappiness to the pure sunshine of contentment and well-being. They took greatest joy in giving her to eat of the most succulent foods, they laid her to sleep in the finest of beds, they did urge her to command and they made her will to be done, and into their hospitable proceedings they introduced all the gentility and understanding it were possible to expect from two sensitive souls. She was given medicines for several days, she was bathed, dressed, arrayed in elegant attire, embellished, the two lovers worshiped her, each labored at nothing but to make her forget her sorrows as quickly as might be. An excellent surgeon was fetched; he undertook to make the ignominious mark disappear, and soon the cruel result of Rodin's villainy was effectively gone; and everything responded to the cares her benefactors lavished upon Therese: the shadowed memories of misery were already effaced from that amiable girl's brow; already the Graces had re-established their empire thereupon. For the livid tints on her cheeks of alabaster were substituted the rosy hue appropriate to her years; what had been withered by such a multitude of griefs was called back to fresh new life. Laughter, for so many years banished from her lips, reappeared again under the wings of Pleasure. The very best news came from the Court; Monsieur de Corville had put all of France in action, he had reanimated the zeal of Monsieur S* * *, who collaborated with him to publicize Therese's ill-treatment and to restore her to a tranquillity to which she was so heavily entitled. At length letters came from the King, they nullified all the legal proceedings unjustly initiated against her, they gave her back the name of an honest citizen, imposed silence upon all the realm's tribunals before which efforts had been made to defame her, and accorded her a thousand crowns a year, interest realized upon the gold seized in the counterfeiters' Dauphine work-shop. They wished to make Cardoville and Saint-Florent answer for their misdeeds but, in accordance with the fatality of the star intending upon all of Therese's persecutors, one of them, Cardoville, had just, before his crimes were made known, been named to the administration of the Province of * * *, and the other to general supervision of Colonial Trade; each had already reached his destination, the edicts affected no one but the powerful families who soon found means to quiet the storm and, pacifically installed in Fortune's sanctuary, those monsters' depredations were quickly forgotten.

 

(As for the monks of Saint Mary-in-the-Wood, suppression of the religious orders will expose the atrocious crimes of that horrible crew.)

With what regards Therese, as soon as she learned of so many agreeable developments she came well-nigh to expiring from joy; for several days on end the sweetest tears flowed from her eyes and she rejoiced upon her guardians' breasts, and then, all of a sudden, her humor altered, and 'twas impossible to ferret out the cause. She became somber, uneasy, troubled, was given to dreaming, sometimes she burst into weeping before her friends, and was not herself able to explain what was the subject of her woe. "I was not born for such felicity," said she to Madame de Lorsange, "... oh, dear sister, 'tis impossible it last much longer." She was assured all her troubles were over, none remained, said they, no more inquietude for her; 'twas all in vain, nothing would quiet her; one might have said that this melancholy creature, uniquely destined for sorrow, and feeling the hand of misery forever raised above her head, already foresaw the final blow whereby she was going to be smitten down.

Monsieur de Corville was still residing on his country estate; 'twas toward summer's end, they had planned an outing when the approach of a dreadful storm obliged them to postpone their promenade; the excessive heat had constrained them to leave all the windows open. Lightning glitters, shakes, hail slashes down, winds blow wrathfully, heaven's fire convulses the clouds, in the most hideous manner makes them to seethe; it seems as if Nature were wearied out of patience with what she has wrought, as if she were ready to confound all the elements that she might wrench new forms from them. Terrified, Madame de Lorsange begs her sister to make all haste and close the shutters; anxious to calm her, Therese dashes to the windows which are already being broken; she would do battle with the wind, she gives a minute's fight, is driven back and at that instant a blazing thunderbolt reaches her where she stands in the middle of the room... transfixes her.

Madame de Lorsange emits a terrible cry and falls in a faint; Monsieur de Corville calls for help, attentions are given each woman, Madame de Lorsange is revived, but the unhappy Therese has been struck in such wise hope itself can no longer subsist for her; the lightning entered her right breast, found the heart, and after having consumed her chest and face, burst out through her belly. The miserable thing was hideous to look upon; Monsieur de Corville orders that she be borne away....

"No," says Madame de Lorsange, getting to her feet with the utmost calm; "no, leave her here before my eyes, Monsieur, I have got to contemplate her in order to be confirmed in the resolves I have just taken. Listen to me, Corville, and above all do not oppose the decision I am adopting; for the present, nothing in the world could swerve my designs.

"The unheard of sufferings this luckless creature has experienced although she has always respected her duties, have something about them which is too extraordinary for me not to open my eyes upon my own self; think not I am blinded by that false-gleaming felicity which, in the course of Therese's adventures, we have seen enjoyed by the villains who battened upon her. These caprices of Heaven's hand are enigmas it is not for us to sound, but which ought never seduce us. O thou my friend! The prosperity of Crime is but an ordeal to which Providence would expose Virtue, it is like unto the lightning, whose traitorous brilliancies but for an instant embellish the atmosphere, in order to hurl into death's very deeps the luckless one they have dazzled. And there, before our eyes, is the example of it; that charming girl's incredible calamities, her terrifying reversals and uninterrupted disasters are a warning issued me by the Eternal, Who would that I heed the voice of mine guilt and cast myself into His arms. Ah, what must be the punishment I have got to fear from Him, I, whose libertinage, irreligion, and abandon of every principle have stamped every instant of my life I What must I not expect if 'tis thus He has treated her who in all her days had not a single sin whereof to repent I Let us separate, Corville, the time has come, no chain binds us one to the other, forget me, and approve that I go and by an eternal penance abjure, at the Supreme Being's feet, the infamies wherewith I am soiled absolutely. That appalling stroke was necessary to my conversion in this life, it was needed for the happiness I dare hope for in another. Farewell, Monsieur; the last mark of your friendship I ask is that you institute no perquisitions to discover what shall have become of me. Oh, Corville! I await you in a better world, your virtues should lead you unto it; may the atonements I make, to expiate my crimes, in this place where I go to spend the unhappy years that remain to me, permit me to encounter you again someday."

Madame de Lorsange leaves the house immediately; she takes some money with her, leaps into a carriage, to Monsieur de Corville abandons the rest of her ownings after having recommended that they be turned into a pious legacy, and flies to Paris, where she takes a Carmelite's veil; not many years go by before she becomes the example of her order and the edification, as much by her great piety as by the wisdom of her mind and the regularity of her manners.

Monsieur de Corville, worthy of his country's highest posts, attained to them, and, whatever were his honors, he employed them for no end but to bring happiness to the people, glory to his master, whom, "although a minister," he served well, and fortune to his friends.

O you who have wept tears upon hearing of Virtue's miseries; you who have been moved to sympathy for the woe-ridden Justine; the while forgiving the perhaps too heavy brushstrokes we have found ourselves compelled to employ, may you at least extract from this story the same moral which determined Madame de Lorsange! May you be convinced, with her, that true happiness is to be found nowhere but in Virtue's womb, and that if, in keeping with designs it is not for us to fathom, God permits that it be persecuted on Earth, it is so that Virtue may be compensated by Heaven's most dazzling rewards.